


A Kiss on the Wrist

by niallersdirtymofo



Series: A Kiss on the Wrist Trilogy [1]
Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Blow Jobs, Cutting, Emotional Abuse, F/M, Falling In Love, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Forced Prostitution, He makes her fer feel pretty again, Inspired by Music, Larry fight over a girl, Love Letters, Multi, Niall falls for a girl with self harm issues, POV Alternating, POV First Person, Physical Abuse, Porn With Plot, Public Sex, Scars, Self-Harm, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Content, Shower Sex, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Threesome - F/M/M, and i'm just too lazy, anywhore i swear to u my writing has gotten so much stronger over the last year and a half, awe, but also some really serious moments, but c'mon this WAS my first fanfic, but then they just end up dating her at the same time, but u should really give this a chance, ffs i know like no one reads HET on Ao3, god i'm sorry this is 1st person POV, holy shit that feels like a life time ago, i coun't help it, i need his accent like i need air, i started in august 2012, i wish i could redo it into 3rd but that would take forever, i'm laughing bc this fandom is way too obsessed with buttsex tbh, idk it's got a lot of funny moments, it's a bit carroty in the beginning, just appreciate his irishness u punks, obama would want you to, oh and i write out niall's accent..., p.s like no use of condoms sorry, smut doesn't really start until ch 19 for those of u horny fucks only looking for some porn!, so just bare with me thru the cliche crap, so yeah that's a thing, sorry but there is no butt sex in this..., they just kill my mojo, threeway relationship, well there is but it's not boyxboy buttsex....
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2014-01-27
Packaged: 2017-12-25 19:33:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 27
Words: 178,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/956832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/niallersdirtymofo/pseuds/niallersdirtymofo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>It all started with a kiss on the wrist...</i>
</p>
<p>or, the one where Niall falls for a girl with a scarred body and broken past, Liam is just kinda there for moral support while he sorts out his own love life, Zayn is deep (as per usual) and preparing to propose to Perrie, and Harry and Louis are cock fighting over a pretty girl named Jetta... which eventually leads to a pretty sexy three way relationship.</p>
<p> <br/><i>[p.s you can also read this trilogy on wattpad, and if you'd prefer that, then here are the wattpad codes to add my stories to your library:</i></p>
<p> <br/>||a kiss on the wrist- <b>8650401</b></p>
<p>||a kiss on the cheek- <b>11642890</b></p>
<p>||a kiss on the lips- <b>33093821</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Please Stop, I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** I _wish_ I could say I own, cherish, and lovingly enslave every member of One Direction for my own sexual enjoyment... but I do not. However, I do own all of the original characters that you will find in this story ;) [aka the lucky bitches that get to fictionally steal their hearts, as well as the other morally corrupt and fucked up characters that just won't leave Channing the hell alone]
> 
> **OH...** one more thing. This is not a love story about Niall Horan and Channing Tatum you fucking weirdos. C'monnnnn...

**Channing's P.O.V**

I stood among the mass of screaming, withering fan girls, trying as hard as possible to keep my sanity. I was meant to come to this signing with my friend Jetta, but she'd bailed on me last minute. So now I'm standing here, looking like a creepy, friendless, loner; I mean technically that's true, but still, I would've felt so much better if she were here. She's the only one who understands just how important these boys are to me.

I crossed my arms over my chest, putting all of my weight on one heel while I tapped my other foot, impatiently. I had my skateboard on the ground and was gently rolling it back and forth with my injured foot; it still hurt to put any pressure on my left foot, so my right was starting to get really tired from baring my weight all day long.

Jeff had really done a number on me last night.

_*Flashback*_

_I placed the pizza into the oven and then sprinted up the stairs to call Jetta back since I promised to do so when I got the chance. I ran into my room and flopped onto my bed, wincing a little at the bruises that still remained on my ribs after pissing Jeff off a few nights ago. I dialed her number and rolled onto my back so that I was staring up at my only One Direction poster, feeling that familiar fluttering in the pit of my stomach._

_Some people may be obsessed with them for their music or their looks... but not me. I just was in love with the whole package. Their personalities are the greatest I've ever known, and it's safe to say that I would adore them even if they sounded terrible and looked like trolls. Jet finally picked up the phone after the fifth ring, "Hey Chan... what's up?" she asked, sounding unsure._

_"Nothing really... you ok?" I asked her as I absentmindedly twirled my long dark hair around my finger._

_"Channing ... I'm really sorry..." she trailed off, and my eyes shot wide open, because I knew what she was going to say, "But I can't come tomorrow to the signing..." she almost whispered the last part, probably because she knew that I'd feel upset. Not angry... just anxious about going alone._

_"O-Oh... Well that's okay, Jet," I stuttered, as I released the dark lock of hair and rubbed my hands down my face, "No really, it's okay. I'm still going to go. You know I need to see them," I said softly, trying to reassure her._

_"I'm sorry, I really am... but coach said she's going to put me in for Kelsey's spot at the swim meet in Chesterfield. I have to swim the 200 meter fly," she groaned. I smiled a little, because I knew Jetta absolutely hated the butterfly stroke, even though she was the absolute best at it._

_"Awe... you'll do great!" I smiled trying to sound excited for her, even though in the back of my mind I was a little depressed at the fact that I was going to have to go to the signing tomorrow all alone. Ugh I was going to feel like such a creep._

_"Have fun, okay? And make sure you give Niall the letters, Chan," she said seriously. I sucked in a deep breath, almost forgetting about that. I was about to reply when I heard my least favorite voice in the entire world screech up the steps, "C-H-A-N-N-I-N-G!" Jeff screamed from the first floor, and that's when I suddenly smelled it... that burnt smell. Oh shit, the pizza!_

_"I gotta go J, call me tomorrow!" I whispered hurriedly into the phone before hanging up and sprinting back down the stairs; I came to a stop suddenly to see Jeff standing there, with the burnt pizza in his hands, glaring at me like I was a piece of shit._

_"I'm sorry, Jeff! I was just talking to Jetta about her swim me---" before I could finish my plea, I felt a hard smack cross my face, and my head whipped to the side as I held my throbbing cheek. I could already feel the tears welling up in my eyes. You'd think after going through this bullshit day after day, I'd work up some kind of numbness to it... but no. Every slap, punch, and kick stung as bad as the first time he hit me, three years ago. Still holding the pizza in his hand, he came forward and backhanded me, causing me to lose my balance and I crumbled to the floor._

_After smacking me to the ground, I tried to crawl away, but he grabbed my ankle and dragged me back across the kitchen; my eyes widened in horror as he took the still hot pan, after dumping the pizza to the ground, he roughly pushed it against my bare foot. The blood curdling scream that was wrenched from my lips lasted for about 5 seconds, until he finally pulled the pan away. The tears were streaming down my cheeks as I cradled my red, angry looking heel in my hands. I was in total shock as I stared at the strange little pattern of dots left behind from the pan, which were quickly turning into blisters. This had to be a second degree burn._

_"Get up and order a pizza you useless bxtch!" he screamed as he grabbed me by my hair and lifted me to my feet. I quickly took hold of the counter to balance myself and without even looking over my shoulder I limped from the room, leaving my fuming step father and the burnt pizza remains on the floor._

_I stumbled up to my room, and after ordering the stupid dick his pizza, I went to my bathroom, locking myself inside. I turned on the shower and quickly stripped off my clothes, being careful when I pulled my left pant leg over my foot. I still felt like the pan was pressed up against my flesh, it was excruciating._

_I hobbled into my shower after switching my iPod onto shuffle. I sat against the cold shower wall as the scalding water rained down on me. I felt myself relaxing to Ed Sheeran's soothing voice as "Lego House" drifted into the shower, encircling me in whispered words of love. It was the only time I ever felt loved or protected. How sad is that? The only time I ever felt like I was worthy enough to feel love, was when I heard the voices of Ed and my five favorite boys._

_My tears mixed with the clean water, trailing down my cheeks and dying at my lips. The salty taste was something I was so used to, and the thought of it made me cry even harder._

_My body was shaking with sobs as I grabbed for one of my hidden razors I had taped up underneath my sink. I fumbled with the tape, finally pulling the razor free and bringing my arm back into the warmth of the shower. I was about to slide the glistening metal across my usual place, my thighs, but I looked at the condition they were in and decided against it, as they were still a bit torn up from the other night. My eyes slowly wandered to my wrists. I had a few scars along my forearms, but for the most part, I tried to avoid cutting my wrists... merely because it seemed so cliché. I didn't cut for the attention, I cut to feel control. However, at that moment, I didn't care about the fact I'd have to worry about hiding the cuts tomorrow... at that moment, I just wanted to feel the release._

_As I slid the razor across my marred flesh, I winced slightly as I pushed down hard enough to draw blood, but not deep enough to cause any serious damage. Although I truly hated my life at the moment, I never actually wanted to end it. I'm not sure why cutting felt so good to me, but it was like a drug, and I needed to reach that high in order to deal with the fxcked up things in my life and carry on. I just hoped that one day I'd be able to look back on these days and be proud of myself for getting through them._

_As the blood flowed freely from the open wound across my wrist, and I watched each droplet flow into the clean water, I felt my heartache lessen, and my resolve to overcome grow stronger. This was just a phase, I knew that eventually I'd be able to stop, at least I hoped I would... but for now, this was the only way I was able to cope. If it weren't for those boys though... I'm not sure I'd still be here._

_I sat in the shower for a long time, as I watched the streams of red tinted water disappear down the drain. I sat there feeling numb until the water ran cold and my teeth began to chatter. I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my wrist as I left the bathroom. I didn't have to worry about a mess, because I only ever cut in the shower, exactly for that reason. I also only used dark bath towels so that any blood stains wouldn't be noticeable._

_After taking my desk chair and ramming it under my bedroom door handle, just like I did every single night... I shrugged into my warm fuzzy robe and crawled under my sheets. As I pulled and cuddled my injured wrist against my chest; I felt sleep tugging at my eyelids. After a few moments, I gave in and let the darkness surround me as the promise of dreams of a better life carried me away._

_*End Flashback*_

I shivered slightly at the memory as I slipped my iPod out of my pocket and began shuffling through the songs until I came to one I hadn't listened to in a while, "Until the Day I Die", by Story of the Year. After pushing my ear buds in, I felt my back muscles immediately relax to the music. I started softly humming along with the tune, trying my best not to disturb anybody around me, but they were all so busy babbling with their friends about One Direction that I felt pretty much invisible, which I saw as a good thing. I liked being invisible, it was considered a super power after all, wasn't it?

Some people may accuse me of being overly dramatic when I say that One Direction saved me... but I honestly feel like they did. Before I found out who they were and began watching the video diaries and interviews last year, I honestly felt so hopeless and alone... like I was just existing in my horrible life as I let Jeff beat the shxt out of me every night. After I found them, things seemed to change for me. I found myself getting excited about little things again, like the boys appearing on a talk show or doing a twitcam. It may seem simple and juvenile, but I honestly didn't have much to look forward to in my life, and just reading about, listening to, and watching the boys made things seem a little better. They were just so honest and real. I was probably one of their biggest fans, not for their music or looks, but just because without knowing it, they gave me a distraction... and a way to feel happiness again.

I wasn't a typical fangirl... I didn't collect every single piece of merchandise, I didn't go to their concerts, or constantly ask them to follow me on twitter. I just kept up with the things they were doing and loved them from afar. Yep, that sounds pretty stalkerish and weird, but it's the only way I can explain it.

I gripped the envelope which housed the letters I'd written to Niall tightly in my hand, still unsure if I was going to deliver it to him. In the letters, I literally bared my soul,revealing all of my secrets, hopes, dreams and fears. I suppose the letters were somewhat of a diary. I just wanted the boys to know they helped me, and made me feel loved even though they had no idea who I was... and I just wanted them to know me, like I felt like I knew them. I shoved the envelope back into my pocket before clicking my iPod to change it to the next song.

Some of the other girls were beginning to sit down, since we'd been standing here for hours, so I decided to join in and plopped down rather ungracefully onto my skateboard, slowly rolling myself back and forth. The girls who were sitting behind me gave me a weird look and then whispered to each other; I shrugged my shoulders and continued listening to my iPod, I didn't really care what people thought or said about me. Honestly, their remarks couldn't hurt me at all compared to what I had to put with on a daily basis.

As I sat there pretty much twiddling my thumbs, (it's not like I could afford a phone, and hell would freeze over before Jeff ever bought me one... not to mention, my iPod was a hand-me-down from Jetta), I listened as the song changed. My heartbeat started racing as I listened to the gentle strumming of the opening of the song. This song always made me break down, because I felt like they were singing it right to me. I squeezed my eyes shut as I listened to Zayn's beautiful, even tone, followed by Liam. Truthfully, Little Things meant a lot to me, just because of its honesty and simplicity. I looked at my thighs and played with the frayed edges of my white cut-off jeans, pulling them down slightly to cover one of my scars that was slightly peeking out.

As I listened to my favorite part of the song, I slid my bracelets up a little and rubbed my fingers over the slash marks that decorated my left wrist. The part where I held my breath and imagined I had a different life... Niall's solo. He delivered it so well, and it just killed me that I felt so many emotions toward someone who would never even know I existed. Yeah, sure they'd meet me today and say hello, and maybe give me a high five, or if I'm really lucky, a hug... but honestly as soon as I left, I would just mix in with all of the memories they had of meeting their fans.

I felt a single tear escape, betraying my closed eyes as it slid down my cheek. I quickly swiped it away and opened my grey eyes to look up at the clouds as I lay back and rested my head on my arms. I was using my skateboard as a pillow, and oddly, it was rather comfortable. As Little Things came to a close, I felt that sinking in my stomach I always got after this song finished... emptiness. It was so beautiful and made me smile for 3 minutes and 38 seconds... but every time it ended, I remembered I was unwanted and utterly alone... and that's how it would always be.

Although the chatter happening around me was rather loud and obnoxious, it seemed to get ten times worse as the girls began suddenly screaming and jumping up and down. I realized that could only mean one thing, so I looked up just in time to see the boys standing by the table with big grins on their faces, staring out into the crowd. I quickly shot up to my feet and hugged my arms up to my chest as I watched the other fan girls go absolutely nuts. Sometimes I was embarrassed to be a directioner just because some of the fans could be so... intense. Though, at the end of the day, I remember I'm a directioner for the boys, not the fans... so I don't let it bother me. I mean, maybe the boys have helped some of these other girls to the extremes they helped me.

My eyes took a few seconds to absorb the perfection that radiated from each boy. First there was Louis, with his poised demeanor and adorable smile, then Zayn, who stood waving as he tried to hide a little smirk, always trying to seem mysterious. Liam was in middle of the boys, a big genuine smile covered his face as he waved enthusiastically to the crowd. God he looked like such a puppy. At the end of the table, sat Harry with his cute dimples and cheeky smile, and sitting next to him, last (you know, because he's Irish) but not least was Niall. Blond hair, dark roots, pale complexion, blue eyes, braces... God he was just so perfect. I had the biggest crush on the Irish one... seriously, I was probably borderline obsessed.

They passed a megaphone down the line of boys, when it reached Niall, he smiled and brought it up to his mouth; goosebumps skittered up my arms as I heard the ring of his Irish accent echoing through the crowd, "'Ello, how're yeh all doin' tahday?" he greeted happily to all the frantic girls. He was answered by a collective scream, as well as a few vulgar remarks.

"Well, the lads n' I are so exited tah be here, an' we wantah tank ev'ryone fer commin' out tahday. Yer all so amazin'," He said with a laugh as the girls screamed again. Well actually, they never stopped screaming... so they just continued to scream. The girls standing behind me were especially loud, and I was a little concerned for my ear drums.

I felt a big grin take over my face as I saw their body guards release the first mass of obnoxious girls to the boys' table. I watched on in awe as line after line of girls went through, giving them gifts, things to sign, high fives and quick one armed hugs if time allowed. As I got closer to the front of the line, I could feel my nerves coiling around into a big ball in my stomach. As I continued getting closer and closer, my anxiety continued to grow. I just wanted to get up there and stare at them... would they find that odd?

I watched closely as the boys interacted with their fans and couldn't help but to squeal (on the inside) at how cute they were with their bromances. Niall and Harry kept messing around and laughing, while Louis kept complaining, asking them all why he ended up sitting so far away from Harry. I rolled my eyes and grinned stupidly at their cuteness. I mean... Narry was my OTP, so I was in fangirl heaven at the moment... you know... if I was a fangirl.

By the time I reached the front of the line, I was feeling so nervous and self conscious I could puke. God... please don't let me barf on Niall... I beg of you. There were still about five girls waiting in front of me, and I stood, feeling like a complete bundle of nerves as I was ushered forward by one of the not so friendly body guards.

I suddenly began feeling very weird watching as all the other girls gripped onto their CD's and various merchandise because I hadn't brought anything for the boys to sign. Wow... this was going to be awkward. Um... hi. I'm Channing and I was just wondering if I could awkwardly stand here for five minutes and stare at your beautiful faces? Hopefully they'd go for it...

I was about ten feet away from the boys, and up next to walk to the table, "Keep moving, keep moving!" I kept hearing the body guards repeat harshly. I hated the way they rushed us through this... for some people (like me) this may be their only chance to meet the boys.

I felt my body trembling slightly as one of the body guards gave me a gentle shove toward the table. All the girls in front of and behind me had cameras ready and were laughing and sometimes squealing as they tried to gain the boys' attention. My eyes wandered to behind the table where they had boxes where they put the things their fans gave them... these events must be so overwhelming; honestly what on earth do they do with all of those gifts?

As I made my way to the table, I tried to tame my wandering thoughts and focus on the moment. This was my only chance to ever interact with them, and I didn't want to let it pass me by because I was nervous. Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, I reached the table and nearly fainted as Louis threw his bright, shining smile my way.

"'Ello, love... how are you today?" Louis chirped, in his beautiful little high pitched accent, as his eyes met mine. He looked toward my hands, I guess expecting me to thrust some random object in his face for him to sign. I smiled sheepishly as I put my hands up and shrugged my shoulders. "Nothing for us to sign?" he asked curiously as he slid his permanent marker smoothly behind his ear, I assume for safe keeping?

I felt my cheeks warm slightly as I awkwardly clapped my hands together shaking my head. I scrunched up my face in concentration as I thought about what to say without sounding like a deranged stalker.

I let out an awkward laugh as I gazed into his pretty eyes, "Yeah... sorry. I don't really want anything signed..." I stopped speaking when I heard one of Niall's famous laughs at the end of the table. Both Harry and himself were in hysterics about something a fan said. I felt a dumb smile slip onto my face as I watched Niall laugh, but then quickly snapped my head back to Louis when I heard him clear his throat.

"Oh! I'm sorry, I was just going to say that I... I just really wanted to meet you. All of you..." I motioned to all the boys sitting along the table, "I just wanted to let you all know how much you've helped me through some hard times in my life." I said, and I could hear my voice trembling. "I don't need any autographs, I know you're just normal people. I just really wanted to meet you, and say thanks... is that alright?," I trailed off as I looked up shyly.

I still felt like I was on the verge of tears, but I held myself together... I wasn't going to let myself fall to pieces in front these boys who I loved so much. Or these thousands of girls behind me who had freaking cameras.

When I looked up, I saw that I had the attention of the rest of the table; Louis was nodding his head approvingly as my eyes met his once more.

"Of course that's fine, love," Liam gushed as he gave me a huge smile.

"Not to mention refreshing," Zayn added softly as he stood up and leaned across the table to give me a hug. I was so stunned at first, it took me a few seconds to actually hug him back. I squeezed him tightly, still surprised that he did that. Usually it's the fans that initiate the hugs, right?

Louis nodded his head and took my hand. He kissed it quickly and also leaned across the table to hug me. I heard some of the girls still waiting in line making catty remarks. I let a single tear slip down my cheek as I hugged Louis tightly. He pulled back and looked me in the eye, swiping the tear off my cheek.

"A pretty girl like you should never cry," Louis whispered as he released me.

After giving Louis a grateful smile, I made my way down the table, stopping in front of Liam; he was also smiling at me as he stood, pulling me in for a hug, "We're so happy you came out to see us, ..." he trailed off, hinting to know my name.

"O-oh! My name is Channing," I said in an excited stutter, "Some people call me Chan..." I continued, lamely.

Liam smiled and squeezed me into another hug before saying, "Well Chan, we're so happy you came, and we're happy that we helped you in any way we could," he said seriously as he looked me in the eye, "Now, you take care of yourself, yeah?" he insisted.

I nodded my head, offering Liam a silent promise before he released me from the hug. As I turned and made my way towards the end of the table, I looked up to see a pair of bright green eyes as well as a pair colored in blue starring at me curiously. Oh be still my Narry heart...

**Niall's P.O.V**

I watched the girl give Liam a hug, as she did so, she squeezed her her eyes shut and a smile of pure happiness was etched on her face. As Liam released her, and whispered for her to take care of herself, the smallest hint of red decorated her cheeks. She seemed so genuinely happy to meet us. These were always my favorite fans to meet... the simple, honest, sweet ones.

She did a small wave to the three boys who'd just given her a hug, and proceeded down the table to meet me and Harry.

She honestly was stunning, she had a very unique look about her. Very long dark hair that tumbled down her back in soft waves. A small button nose, high cheek bones, and if you looked closely, a faint splash of freckles decorated her cheeks. Her complexion was naturally tan and clear of makeup, which was something I admired. Her eyebrows were thin yet defined and she had a single dimple in her left cheek, which I thought was adorable. She was wearing a green OBEY snapback (my kind of girl) and had on a loose Rolling Stones band tee, with white cut-off shorts and light blue Vans. She also wore a messenger bag over one shoulder and held a worn skateboard which was decorated in band stickers.

The most interesting part of her, I'd have to say were her eyes... they were an extremely light grey, almost looking completely colorless. In a way it was haunting, but I saw them as beautiful; I'd never seen anyone with eyes like hers before. I didn't catch her name the first time around so I spoke up as she stood in front of us, "Sorry, love... I didn' catch yer name?" I asked as I watched her grip her skateboard tightly.

"I- It's Channing," she smiled, "or Chan for short," she explained further. Her smile was not a perfect Hollywood smile, rather it was adorably childlike; her teeth were straight, yet they were very small and square. It was beautiful.

I smiled at her as I heard Harry's raspy voice speak up, "We truly are happy you came out to meet us. It's rare that someone doesn't wish to hassle us for pictures and autographs," he said as he leaned across the table and wrapped his arms around her. She buried her face into the crook of his neck. After a few seconds, she released him and took a step back.

"Thank you all for being so kind," she whispered meekly, looking to the ground. The rest of the boys at the other end of the table still had their attention set on Channing, and I watched as she sidestepped slightly so that she was standing directly in front of me.

"Hello, Niall,' she said, obvious excitement radiating off of her which she was trying to contain.

I felt chills travel up and down my arms at the sound her voice. It sounded so husky and melodic, kind of like one of those voices people might say would sound good on the radio. The rasp in her voice seemed to very well suit her.

I could see that her hands were trembling slightly as she stood in front of me, and tears were in her eyes as she tried to hold it together. At first I wasn't sure if I'd done something wrong... since she didn't seem to be getting this upset in front of the other lads, but then I realized she was giving me a sad smile.

I watched her hand reach into her pocket and pull out a white crumbled envelope. At first I thought she was actually giving me something to sign so I gave her a strange look, but as she brought it closer to me and gently offered it in her outstretched hand for me to take, I realized that it had my name written on the front, in pretty cursive handwriting. The rest of the boys were back to interacting with more fans and signing things, but I could tell they were trying to keep an eye on what was happening between the two of us.

I leaned forward to take the envelop and as I reached for it, I saw something I absolutely hated to see; although she had a few colorful bracelets trying to hide her wrist, I was easily able to see the scars underneath, and a really fresh looking one which was red and jagged.

Instead of grabbing the envelope, I grabbed a hold of her hand and stood up to examine her wounds more closely. Once Channing realized what I was trying to look at she immediately began trying to pull her hand out of my grasp, but I held tight and looked up to meet her strange, beautiful, colorless grey eyes.

Once she locked her eyes on mine she stopped resisting and let her arm go limp in my hold. I saw her eyes begin welling up with tears, but she didn't let them fall, and that was when I realized how strong this girl was. She looked down, shamefully at the ground and I immediately felt a pang of guilt.

I could feel the lads looking at us without trying to bring too much attention to the situation; we didn't want to embarrass her. I broke eye contact and pushed the bracelets up her forearm so I could examine her scars. I rubbed my thumb over some of the faded marks that ran along her forearms, and traced the intricate painful patterns back down to the new one on the middle of her wrist.

"Chan..." I trailed off, as I ripped my eyes away from her painful secret.

Although I'd just met this girl, this was making me feel so upset and I knew I was unable to help. She looked up at me as a single tear escaped her eye and smiled at me through the pain, "It's okay, Niall. This is why you've helped me. Okay? Things would be so much worse if it weren't for you boys," she said in such a comforting way, I almost forgot I was the one who should be comforting her.

I brought her wrist up to my lips without breaking eye contact and gently kissed the jagged marks. I could feel thousands of eyes on us, from both the lads and the fans alike, but at that moment I didn't care. I only cared about trying to comfort Channing... the only way I knew how. I had no control of her situation, and this was the only possible way I could think to show that even though we just met, I really did care about her struggle.

I lowered her wrist from my lips and wrapped my arms around her as I hugged her across the annoying table. For a moment I thought about just jumping over the table to give her a proper hug, but figured she'd probably appreciate it if I didn't make too much a of a scene.

After a few moments I pulled away and I saw the floodgates break as multiple tears began trailing down her rosy cheeks. I still held her close though, and gave her a kiss on the cheek before whispering, "Please stop, I love you."

Her large doe eyes seemed to grow bigger than they already were and I watched her quickly wipe at her eyes; I could tell she didn't like to feel weak in front of anyone. She pulled me in for one last hug, and I honestly didn't mind. I could feel nothing but love and desperation radiating off of this girl, and I felt another stab of guilt at how easy and rewarding my life was at the moment, compared to the obvious hell that she went through. As she pulled away for the last time, I faintly heard her soft reply, "Thank you Niall. I honestly love you... I know you hear it all the time... but it's the truth," she mumbled bashfully.

I smiled at her response, "It's okay, I'm here fer yeh. Jus' remember if things ever get hard, that I'm out there somewhere thinkin' of yeh." I whispered once more.

I studied her expression for another moment before releasing her and began to untie the bracelet that I always wore on my own wrist. Channing watched me curiously as I fumbled with the leather bracelet for a moment before reaching for her wrist.

Her eyes widened again as she realized what I was doing, "No, Niall... I can't take that," she insisted as she attempted to pull her arm out of my grasp.

I merely ignored her as I went to work at tying the bracelet around her left wrist, the one with the fresh cut, "Hush, it's my decision," I said teasingly as I knotted it up so that is wasn't too tight, but wouldn't slip off either.

She looked at the new addition to the other jewelry on her wrist, and I realized her bottom lip was trembling slightly, "Keep it, Chan. If yeh ever feel like doin' that again," I emphasized my words as I swiped my thumb lightly over the scars, "Then I hope you'll look at my bracelet an' remember that I don't want yeh to hurt yerself... ever," I finished softly.

"Thank you, Niall... thank you so much," she said thickly, her voice laced with gratitude.

I could hear that there didn't seem to be much commotion going on around us, so when I looked up, I realized everyone was really quiet and staring at us. Channing seemed to notice the silence and looked around as well, at first she seemed freaked out, but then calmed down once she realized no one was able to hear our whispered conversation.

She released me fully and wiped her cheeks again, ridding herself of any tears and thrust the envelope into my hand, "Please read it," she begged, "Just so you boys know how much you've changed my life."

She gave one last look, smiling at each of us before giving me a lingering gaze. I nodded, promising her I would read the letters. In all honesty, I wanted to rip it open and read them right this second, but I knew I had other fans to meet and would have to wait until we were back at the hotel. I quickly shoved the envelope into my pocket and turned toward the rest of the lads who seemed to be completely speechless as they watched her leave.

I turned and watched her hurry quickly away with her bag swinging on her shoulder and skateboard in her arms. I also noticed the slight limp she had with each step she took; I never knew I could feel so many emotions or feel so protective over a complete stranger.


	2. Dear Niall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall and the boys start reading Channing's first letter...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When the words are in italics then that means it is part of the letter; when the words aren't italicized then that's the boys' actual conversation or their personal thoughts/actions. I know that probably doesn't have to be explained... but I have a bit of an annoying habit of trying to over explain things. Sorry.

**Louis P.O.V**

I tried to keep an eye on what happening at the end of the table without being too obvious, since I still had to attempt to interact with the loud, obnoxious fans that came up after Channing. It was hard to pay attention to them though... they handed me Cd's and magazines to sign and I gave them high fives as I smiled for pictures. I noticed Niall was now standing and holding her wrist as he examined it. What on earth is going on? One of the girls was trying to get my attention and I noticed she had her phone out and was recording me. I waved to the camera but became distracted again as Zayn bumped my shoulder causing me to look at the end of the table once more.

I watched as Niall kissed her wrist and then whispered something to her as he pulled her in for a hug. She squeezed her eyes shut during their embrace and I felt my heart ache for her as I saw two tears glide down, leaving glistening trails down her wet cheeks. She looked as if she were about to crumble into pieces.

"You reckon he knows her or something?" Zayn whispered, sounding distracted. I merely shrugged my shoulders and turned back to the girls in front of me. The one with the video camera was now turned towards the end of the table as she taped Niall and Channing.

I wanted her to stop because it felt like we were all eavesdropping on a very intimate moment, but I bit my tongue because I didn't want her to think it was a big deal, and I honestly didn't want to cause a scene. All of the boys and even the crowd seemed to simmer down as we all watched Channing hug Niall one last time before handing him a piece of paper. All I felt was confusion and curiosity swirling around my brain, making me dizzy.

We watched as the girl with the green snapback and beautiful brown hair hurried away from the table, while Niall faced everyone and nonchalantly pushed the paper into his pocket. We were all going to be asking him about that little ordeal later, that was for sure. He slowly sat back down looking unsure of what to do with himself, like he really had a heavy load weighing on his mind. He suddenly looked up at the girl who still held up her phone, videotaping everything.

"Oi! You there! Were yeh tapin' that girl I jus' spoke with?" he asked kindly.

She nodded her head and wandered away from me, slipping by all of the other lads as she went to stand in front of Niall.

"Ok. what's yer Twitter? Can yeh send me a link of the vid?" he asked as he got his phone out. He looked up at the girl expectantly as she stood there, dumbstruck for a moment.

"Ye-yeah! Sure I'll send it to you! My Twitter is... " she trailed off and looked up at Harry as her cheeks grew red, "it's, um... @harry_wants_my_pussycat," she mumbled, sounding mortified. I swear our fans are some of the most perverted I've ever seen... but come on, we're teenage boys, so we're perfectly fine with that... just, it was a hard thing to get used to.

The girls cheeks grew redder as Harry burst out laughing, smacking his hand on the table.

"That's brilliant!" he said with a big smile on his face, "Ni, remind me to follow her when we get back to the hotel," Harry commented. Niall nodded his head and the girl looked as if she would faint.

"What's your name, love?" Harry asked as he smiled up at the cute redhead.

"It's Lilly," she said smiling.

Niall spoke up, "Well Lilly, I've just followed yeh on Twitter, so send me a DM when you've got a chance, yeah?"

Lilly nodded enthusiastically and she finished getting her items signed, she left with her friend and they quickly hurried away speaking excitedly about what just occurred.

The boys and I continued on with signing autographs and meeting our fans, and after a while, the calmness that had taken over the crowd was gone and they were as rowdy and inappropriate as ever. The most disturbing fans were the young perverted ones. There's nothing like a twelve year old claiming they want some of 'Harry's gravy'. Don't even get me started on the fans that kept handing me freaking carrots. Worst decision of my life... If I never saw a carrot again... it would be too soon.

After another exhausting two  hours we were finally released by management and hurried toward the van, before we could get bombarded by anymore fans. Don't get me wrong, we love our fans to death and we would be NOTHING with out them... but sometimes they're just so intense that we need a break.

After we'd all jumped into the van, I ended up sitting in the front next to Liam, while Zayn, Niall, and Harry squeezed into the back seat. Immediately, everyone looked to Nialler; we all were expecting an explanation.

"Before yeh attack me, I'd jus' like to inform yeh that I've never met Channing before today," he randomly commented as he looked down at his hands, answering the question that was on all of our minds.

"But you looked like old friends, it was odd," Liam spoke up from beside me.

"She was incredibly sweet, though. I'm still reeling at how shy she seemed about not wanting anything signed, and only wanting to meet us." I added.

"Yeah that was nice," Harry said with a smile.

Niall still hadn't spoken much, and was just staring down sadly at his hands.

"Ni, what's the matter?" Zayn asked, sounding concerned as he wrapped an arm over Niall's shoulder.

Niall took both of his hands and rubbed them up and down his face, when he finally pulled them away his face was red and blotchy.

He sighed loudly before speaking again, "I don' know, she jus' seemed so... broken... " Niall trailed off, his voice growing thick with emotion. Zayn still had his arm around him, so he squeezed him into a side hug.

"Did anyone else notice the bruise on her cheek or her limp?" Harry asked hesitantly, specifically watching for Niall's reaction.

There was a collective nod of the head as we all acknowledged that we'd noticed.

I saw that Niall still looked upset, so I reached over and put my hand on his knee in a comforting gesture, "Niall she may have been broken, but she was so strong."

Niall immediately looked up," Lou, yeh didn't see her scars... it was a hard thing tah see on such a beautiful girl..." he trailed off looking downcast again, "Or any girl fer that matter," he added on quietly.

Zayn spoke up as well, "Well you should have seen her face as you hugged her mate, it was pure happiness."

"Don't you guys still find it odd that we can help complete strangers, without even realizing?" Harry voiced randomly. It was true though, I was astounded daily by the amount of fans that said we'd saved them, and made them feel important or beautiful. It made me feel really good that we could have that affect on people; sometimes I just felt bad that we could never meet all of the people we'd helped.

His comment reminded me of something, "Nialler, what did she give you before she left?" I asked curiously.

His eyes opened wider as if he'd forgotten and quickly reached into his pocket, retrieving a worn looking envelope. I could see _'Niall'_ written on the front in pretty cursive handwriting.

"A letter," he said simply as he held it in his hands.

By the look of the envelope it looked to to be rather thick, so I suppose the letter was a few pages long.

"Go on, Niall," Zayn encouraged softly, "Open it up, mate."

Niall hesitated for a moment before looking up and meeting Liam's gaze, "You may as well, we're not going to be leaving any time soon. Look at the loads of people blocking the road," Liam said, pointing out the windshield.

Sometimes it was such a pain getting out of these meet and greets, one time we'd gotten trapped by fans for two hours. They honestly mobbed us constantly... if only they'd be more calm we could spend more time with them, but unfortunately, since so many were extremely headstrong, we never got the chance to just hang out with them, safety being our main concern... for us and for our fans.

Niall nodded his head and after taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, he ran his fingertips along the back of the envelope, slipping his finger under the seal and gently ripped it open.

***Niall's P.O.V***

The boys seemed to be sitting on the edge of their seats, waiting for me to begin reading the letter. As I pulled it out I realized it was actually a collection of letters, and as I flipped through a few pages, I noticed they were dated as far back as last September. I looked up at the boys before taking a deep breath and reading the pretty handwriting on the first letter;

_"June 13th, 2013_

_Dear Niall,_

_I suppose I should say 'Dear One Direction' because I truly do love each of you boys, so please don't take offense to the fact that I begin my letters this way. I just originally wrotie my first letter to Niall, and it's stuck. Now I won't lie, I feel a special connection in my delusional mind to you, Nialler. You mind if I call you that? Well I guess you have no say in it really... if you want to you can call me Channing, Chan, Channy, or you know... nothing at all because I really don't know if you'll ever read these... or if I'll ever have the nerve to give them to you._

_I hope you don't find me strange, but I honestly sometimes forget that I truly don't know you boys... and that we're really not friends. I feel like I know you so well... I mostly blame your video diaries and the realistic fan-fictions I've read from time to time. Ok I'm fibbing, I'm hopelessly addicted to the fanfics. *guilty face* Please don't judge me... and I won't lie, the Niall imagines are my favorite ;)"_

As I read the last line about Channing liking the stories about me the most, I could feel my cheeks turning red. Ugh stupid Irish, rosey cheeks. I heard the boys snicker, but no one made a comment.

_"Anyway, I just wanted to talk to someone. That's why I'm writing these... my friend Jetta suggested that I write in a diary or something, but I realized that would be pointless because once I write something, I don't like to go back and reread it. Most of my memories aren't good ones... so I really don't like to be reminded of them. So I apologize for any mistakes or awkward content these letters hold; after I wrote them, they were stuffed in my bottom desk drawer, and I never read over them again._

_I'm writing to you because I want you to know me... like I've convinced myself I know you. This is the last letter I'm writing, because I plan to go to your signing tomorrow and rid myself of these memories for good. I suggest you start with this one, then go back to the first letter I ever wrote, last fall... and go in chronological order from there. Be advised that some of the things I talk about might make you uncomfortable, and for that I'm truly sorry. I'm writing without a filter and not holding anything back, so if any of you boys are faint of heart, I suggest you stop reading now..."_

I trailed off as I looked up at the rest of the boys, they all had the same expression on their faces, a mixture of curiosity and trepidation. They nodded for me to continue, however, so I read on,

_"I don't have an ideal life. It's actually pretty shitty, (I'm sorry but sometimes I curse like a sailor when I'm emotional, and like I said, I'm not going to filter anything) and most days when I fall asleep, I hope I don't wake up the next morning... I've dreamed of ending it before. I've experienced some really terrible things, but I don't do it. I can't. I stay strong for you. For a group of boys I've never even met, but mostly for you, Niall. I just think 'well if I'm gone, I won't get to hear his laugh, or hear his Irish accent, or see his beautiful teeth after his braces come off. I'd like to think there is an afterlife, and maybe I could watch you from above like a creepy stalker-like angel (I'm totally joking... well kinda) but I'm not a particularly religious person, and I just can't fathom ending my own life when I don't know what could happen on the other side. Haha, I bet I've got you running for the hills, haven't I?... Gosh the more I think about it, the crazier I feel."_

I could feel myself smiling as I read these words written by a complete stranger, and I'd never felt more intrigued by someone's honesty. I felt like I couldn't even call this girl a fan, no, she felt more like a friend.

The boys were still chuckling over the 'stalker-like Angel' comment, "She's funny, mate." Louis chuckled.

Zayn nodded his head in agreement,"Yeah, it's like even though she's not got an ideal life, she still doesn't take things too seriously... I like that." he smiled with a thoughtful look on his face.

By now, we had gotten past the mass of fans blocking the exit and the van was flying down the highway towards our hotel.

"Go on, Niall, finish the letter!" Harry chirped. He seemed to be really into it, in fact they all did. I found myself wanting to read more as well... I wanted to know this girl.

_"Anyway, I think ill introduce myself a little, (you'll learn more thoughout the letters, so I'll just brush over the important things). My name is Channing Priscilla (oh my God I have the most embarrassing middle name in existence; please, let's never speak of it again) and I'm seventeen. My birthday is September 13th (yes... we share a birthday... can you say soul mates!? Kidding....) and I'm a senior in high school. I'm in a band, we're not very good... but it's something I do to pass the time. Our name is The Jupiter Project, don't blame me for the lame name, I had absolutely nothing to do with it. I play the piano, and sing a little, but my specialty is the guitar._

_I'm an avid skateboarder, my cousin got me interested in it when I was nine years old. I still don't feel like I'm very good, but I can roll around and do a few tricks, so I guess that's more than most people can do. Not to mention, its pretty much my only form of transportation, since I don't have a car. I also do not have a phone... shocker, right? I know, but I mean my stepfather is a Grade A asshole, and doesn't agree that I need one. It's alright though, cause I get on just fine without one. I have an iPod and an old laptop courtesy of Jetta's hand-me-downs, so I'm not entirely cut off from the rest of the world. (Jetta is my best friend... she's really the only one I have in the world & you'll hear more about her in my letters) Oh my God am I boring you? If I am, I'm terribly sorry... you see that water mark over towards the bottom of the page? That's not from tears, boys, don't worry... it's actually drool... I'm even putting myself to sleep. How embarrassing."_

The rest of the boys and myself were laughing loudly at all of Channing's random tangents... it's like she couldn't keep her mind focused on a single thought for more than a few moments. I thought it was adorable... I had a weird feeling in my chest as I read through her letter, and in all honesty, I was really looking forward to reading the rest of them.

Louis grabbed the letter from my hands, "C'mon mate, let's finish it before we have to get out!" he said excitedly.

_"Okay, guys. Well, I know you still don't know much about me... other than the fact that I'm rather strange. Don't worry though... if you read through all of my letters, I think you'll come to understand more about me and who I am. If you are still reading this and plan to read the others, I sincerely thank you. It really means a lot... I am so excited for tomorrow, I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight, so I'm sorry if I look like a complete mess. I hope you enjoy my letters... most of them I try to make funny and light-hearted (if they're actually not funny, well... then I blame my mother... she always told me I was funny :/) but some of my other letters are very heavy and deal with some serious shit... just a fair warning. Please take care of yourselves boys, I'm sure I'm not the only girl out there who feels lost... and you help bring me back to a place I want to be. A place where I'm happy. I love you guys. I really do._

_Love, Channing_

_xoxoXOxoxo < a hug & kiss for each of you (oh and the big one's for Nialler *blush*) Sorry I am after all, incase you haven't guessed, a 'Niall Girl'."_

Louis looked up from the letter with a big grin on his face, as I looked around to the rest of the boys, I noticed they all had a similar look about them. Louis handed the note back to me and I folded it neatly, tucking it back safely into the envelope with the other letters. I did a quick count and got a total of 12 letters. I guess I was going to be up late tonight; I was going to know this girls story. Once I knew her story, I'd wait for Lilly to upload that video... it was really my only chance of finding her... which I had every intention of doing. I'm not sure what, but something was calling me to her... and I was going to find out what it was.


	3. Help from the Twitterverse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall is still reading letters... then reaches out to Channing via Twittah. The other boys decide to help him while they eat at Olive Garden... yummy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God I started writing this a year ago, and it almost makes me cringe to reread all of my old work... I assure you this story gets sooo much better as the chapters go on. Please bear with me.

**Channing's P.O.V**

My body was shaking so violently, it was almost painful, but it was a good pain. They spoke to me, although it may have only lasted five minutes, I felt like they'd chipped away years of anguish that had been building walls around my heart. I was just floating on air as I hobbled away from the mass of raging fans. Once I reached the corner market that was near the skate park, I decided I couldn't make it any further so I dropped my bag and board and rested my back against the harsh brick building as I slid down to the ground. My knees were pulled up to my chest and I wrapped my arms around my legs as I leaned my face down and let the tears fall. I'm not sure why I felt so emotional, I lay my cheek against my arms and looked at my wrist; it was scarred and ugly, but he didn't seem repulsed by it or frightened like most people were. He acted concerned, upset, and if anything... _angry_. I can't believe Niall kissed my scars, I just couldn't wrap my mind around it... he doesn't even know me. Girls are throwing themselves at him constantly, _beautiful girls_ \-- girls that are happy and whole, not lost and broken. So why would he show any kind of interest in me?

It was a warm day and I could feel the beads of sweat trickling down my neck; I removed my band tee and stuffed it into my bag, leaving me in my plain black singlet. Normally, I tried not to show much skin, but today I wasn't going to be bothered with caring what other people thought of the marks on my skin. These marks tell a story, and that's something that people just didn't seem to understand. It's a horrible, sad, and depressing story; but it's the story of my life, nonetheless. 

The wind blew my hair around my face and as I watched my long locks dance around me, I couldn't help the stupid grin that slipped onto my face. In this moment, right now, I felt okay. I wasn't happy, but for the first time in a long time... I was okay. Even if Niall were to simply toss my letters away and never look at them again, the way he made me feel in those few moments we shared together was enough to keep me going... for now.

I relaxed for a few minutes against the old brick building as my eyes wandered towards the skate park. I saw a few kids grinding and trying new tricks; I would have loved to join in, but could barely roll down the block with my foot in the condition it was in. Reluctantly, I climbed to my feet and grabbed my bag  as I stepped onto my board and started heading towards my personal hell hole, also known as _Home Sweet Home_. Little Things was playing on my iPod again; no matter how often I heard this song, I'm never able to skip it. It just speaks to my soul. I just hoped that someday, I'll find someone, out there somewhere who will accept all of my little things... including my scars.

**Niall's P.O.V**

I made my way to the lounge area in our room and plopped down on the couch, immediately pulling out Channing's letters. The boys were actually about to head out to eat somewhere but I declined and just asked them to bring me something back. There were enough snacks in the room to hold me over until then... but for right now, all I cared about was reading Channing's story. I wasn't sure what it was about her... but she just seemed so sincere and humble; I couldn't help but want to explore her mind, and by reading these letters, I had a feeling I could do just that;

_"September 17th, 2012_

_Dear Niall,_

_You don't know me, and it's not like you ever will... but right now, I don't care about that. All I need right now is someone to talk to, and since I don't have that at the moment, I'll just have to confide in you. Normally, I'd talk to my friend, Jetta, but some of this shit that goes on in my life... well I just don't want to get her involved in it. It's better if she doesn't know... she's safer if she stays out of it._

_My name is Channing and I just turned seventeen years old a few days ago... I know you just had a birthday to, so, Happy Late Birthday, Nialler. I guess I should just start from the beginning? Well I'll just give you the short version. My father committed suicide when I was five years old, and I don't remember much of him. He meant a lot to me... but for the most part, it's too painful to think about him... so I try not to remember him._

_For a while, it was just my mother and I... we never really had a stable home because she was in and out of work; I was always having to change schools since we were constantly moving. That being said, it became very hard for me to make friends, so after a while I just stopped trying. It was easier to by lonely and have no one, than get close to someone, only to have them ripped out of my life a few months later. I can't say that I had a great childhood, but I won't complain because there are plenty of people out there who had it worse than I did. I was clothed, fed, and housed... so as far as I'm concerned... I suppose my Mother did her job, and I know she loved me._

I took a second and reread the last line of what Channing had written. She really was something, and for some reason I felt really proud of her for trying to give her mother some credit. Most people try to blame their parents for everything... but it was refreshing to see that she still respected the sacrifices her mother made. I barely knew this girl, but I felt such a connection to her... it almost scared me. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and proceeded to read the letter silently to myself:

_"I started singing when I was around six years old, and I always got compliments on my voice because it's "raspy," and I guess that's something people like? I don't know, but after awhile, playing music and singing became a very huge outlet for me. I poured my heart and soul into it, the band that I was apart of for the past few months has been going south, so lately... I just play in my room, by myself. The guys in the band are alright, all but one that is. His name is Tate... and he's just a pig. I just don't get a good vibe from him, so I try to stay out of his way._

_"My mother was always supportive of my singing, and it's because of her I learned to play so many instruments. That all changed however when she got involved with Jeff four years ago. Jeff is my step-father, and although he was alright for the first year or so that I knew him, he is a very different person now. I can say without a doubt he is the worst person in my life. I'm terrified of him, for many reasons. To cut to the chase, he is not a good man. Sometimes I think he might kill me one of these days; not only is he an alcoholic, but he's bi-polar as well, and most of the time doesn't bother taking his medication. I'm sorry if I sound whiny or annoying. I'm really trying to not lay it on too harshly right now._

_"I just wanted to talk to someone because I did something to myself tonight that I have never had the courage to do before. I cut myself. On the wrists to be exact... just to try it. I'm a ashamed and scared of my own actions right now and I'm trying to keep myself together, because I can't believe I did it. I've always thought about doing it, but I guess I never saw the point... but tonight, Jeff pushed me over the edge, and I guess I just snapped. The cut on my left wrist really isn't bad... but the one on my right is pretty deep and I don't know how I could be so stupid. The worst part is... that at the time, it felt good. I felt like I got to control something for once. I'm sorry, you probably think I'm so demented. I'm almost certain I won't do it again. I think I just wanted to try it... to see if it helped me._

_"When I got home from school, he was waiting for me in the living room... my mom wasn't home, she never is. She works three jobs to support us all because Jeff "can't find work." I was in a pretty good mood as I walked in the door and that seemed to piss him off even more. He asked me 'what the f*ck my stupid ass was smiling about' and I just stared at him. He quickly got up in my face and as he spoke harshly to me, I thought I was going to be sick because his breath reeked of brandy. To cut the story short, he said I was disrespectful for not answering him, and slapped me across the face. He then proceeded to slam me up against the wall and I honestly was appalled as he stood there, mere inches away from my face and roamed his disgusting eyes up and down my body. I froze when he put his hands on my bare shoulders (I was wearing a tank top) and began rubbing my arms up and down. When he brought his face to my neck and tried kissing me, I started crying. I think this startled him because he immediately backed off, and after calling me a "fucking tease" he smacked me again and stormed out of the room._

_"Niall, I have never been more terrified in my life. He has always been perverted with cold, roaming eyes... but he has never actually touched me until tonight. I'm afraid next time he won't come to his senses, and I won't be so lucky. So I'm going to write to you Niall, because you're Irish and beautiful. I just really need some of that Irish luck, and well, I need someone beautiful in my life right now. Even though you'll never know me, and our relationship will merely be a fantasy in my mind, I just really need you. Please don't leave me._

_Love, Channing xox"_

As I finished reading Channing's letter, I had to keep calm, and remind myself that this happened months ago. My hands were balling into fists and once I realized I was wrinkling the paper, I quickly released it and watched it flutter down to the coffee table.

There was nothing I could do to help her back then, I kept trying to remind myself of that; the guilty voice in my head, however, kept saying there was something I could do about it now. I quickly jumped to my feet and began pacing in front of the telly; I wanted to do something but I just felt so helpless. I had no way to find this girl. I only knew her first and middle name, so I couldn't look her up... and Saint Louis was a big city.

I let out a frustrated sigh and ran my hands through my hair repeatedly as I tried to think of what I could do. Immediately, I considered something... this girl, she said she wasn't cut off from the world. So does that mean she uses twitter? I didn't know her username... but maybe I could send a tweet out... hopefully she would see it and know it was for her. She said she's a big fan, so that means she probably follows me, right?

I excitedly reached in my pocket and fished out my phone, it took me three tries to correctly unlock the screen because I was so worked up at the possibility of reaching out to her. I finally opened up the twitter app, ignoring all my mentions and quickly set about sending out a tweet;

**@NiallOfficial Chan, im here and I want to help you just tell me how <3>**

I stood there for a second just looking at the tweet before I sent it. She should be able to tell how much I cared from that, right? I didn't want to pour my feelings out on twitter... the fans would have a field day with that one. I decided to stop second guessing myself and went ahead and sent out the tweet, then I just sort of stood there, in the middle of the living room. For some reason, I just didn't feel like I'd done enough to show her she could trust me.

I wandered into the bathroom, deciding that I was going to take a shower to try and relax. After stripping off my clothes, I jumped into the warm spray and absentmindedly began humming. Eventually my humming turned to singing, and before I knew it, I was belting out the lyrics to one of my favorite songs off of our Take Me Home album.

I began singing my solo and as I came to the end of it, I suddenly had an idea. As if I were a cartoon character, I felt like a light bulb went off in my brain. I immediately jumped out of the shower, not bothering to find a towel and hurried over to my pile of clothes still on the floor. I began digging for my phone at a frenzied rate, dripping water all over the place and I could feel soap dripping into my eyes, but at that moment I was only focused on one thing. I hastily reopened twitter and began writing a new tweet;

**@NiallOfficial -C- you'll never treat yourself right darlin, but i want you to. if i let you know im here for you, maybe you'll love yourself like i love you. -Ni xx  #FindChanning**

After I sent the tweet, I had a feeling in the pit of my stomach, a warm feeling that started traveling through my veins and invading the rest of my body. I couldn't tell what it was... but it was like that sensation you sometimes get when you're just on the brink of falling asleep and all of a sudden you feel like you're falling. I refreshed my twitter and saw my mentions piling up, but I didn't check any at the moment. Both of my tweets had already been retweeted thousands of times; Channing was bound to see them. All I could do was sit and wait. I felt another set of chills traipse across my cold, wet skin and quickly hopped back into the shower. Now I just had to wait for her to make a move, and I prayed that she would soon.

**Liam's P.O.V**

The boys and I had decided to go to the Olive Garden just down the street from the hotel; surprisingly no fans had spotted us though, so we had a rather pleasant meal. I took a final bite of my pasta and pushed the plate away from me, unable to consume another bite. I stretched out and rubbed my stomach, trying to encourage my food to quickly settle. I'll never know how Nialler can put it away like he does; he could easily eat this plate of pasta and then some. It was actually quite impressive. Zayn and Harry were discussing something about the concert that we had scheduled here in three days, while Louis kept checking his phone, probably texting El. Sometimes I miss having that... that close connection with someone, like I used to have with Danielle. I'd been single since we broke up last year, because I just found it too hard to get to know someone with our hectic schedules, and too be honest, that break up had hit me hard. I'm still not ready to put myself out there again.

I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and checked twitter, the first thing I saw that was interesting was a worldwide trend: **#FindChanning**. To be honest, it really surprised me. Was this 'Niall's Channing?' I quickly clicked on the trend and it led me to all the tweets regarding the hashtag.

"Hey, any of you check twitter lately?" I questioned out loud, without looking away from my phone. My eyes studied the page as I scrolled up and down, seeing mostly the same thing on every tweet. It was a retweet from Niall.

There was a collective "No" from the boys, "Well, have a look," I stated simply, "Search the trends."

I looked up to see all of the lads now searching their phones, as soon as they saw what I'd been referring to, they all looked up, meeting my eyes. I clicked on Niall's page and saw that he had post that tweet about an hour ago.

"What d'ya suppose that's about?" Harry asked softly as he clicked away at his phone.

"Obviously, the girl from the signing," Louis replied, "What I want to know, is what's gotten him all riled up to post something out on twitter," he stated.

"Well, mates, we may as well help him out, yeah?" I asked as I clicked the retweet button Niall's page, "If he's going through all the trouble of involving fans and risking the hate, then it must be important," I concluded.

Everyone nodded their heads and proceeded to retweet Niall. After a moment I clicked to my page and prepared to write my own tweet, Niall shouldn't have to do this alone. Channing should know that we all care about her;

**@Real_Liam_Payne Channing, jst know we're all here 4 u. #findchanning**

After refreshing my page, I saw that I wasn't the only one who had that idea:

**@Louis_Tomlinson Channy, you're beautiful. let's be best friends :)x #FindChanning**

**@zaynmalik you don't have to do this alone #findchanning**

**@Harry_Styles don't be scared, we're all here for u, stay strong love #findchanning**

As I clicked around Twitter a bit, I saw that it was absolutely blowing up from all of our recent tweets. There of course were our "directioners" who were concerned and gave encouraging, sweet tweets; then there were also plenty of our... I think the term our fans use is "directionators"... who were already spreading the hateful gossip of who this girl could be.

I just hoped that this would help Niall feel better, because I know he probably feels guilty about her letter even though their was nothing he could have done at the time... I think we all felt a little guilty about it. I took one last look at the worldwide trends page and saw three trends that had to do with our recent activity;

**#FindChanning**

**#SrslyWTFisAChanning**

**#DidNiallFindHisPrincess**

I smiled a little at the last trend... it was strange... their connection at the signing. For all we know, maybe she could be his princess... but regardless of that; she needs our help. Hopefully the Twitterverse can help us find her.


	4. Our Scars Remind Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Channing sings a song about her scars and then has to deal with her step father, Jeff, being a royal douche when he attempts to sell her body to his friends (again...) Also, you'll meet her bestie Jetta in this chapter. I love Jetta. You should too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Channing "writes" in this chapter is called "Scars" by Papa Roach.

**Channing's P.O.V**

Once I got in sight of my familiar two-story home, I hopped off my skateboard and hesitantly approached the front porch. Relief swept through my veins as I could see that Jeff's beat up truck that was usually parked across the street was gone. It's rare for Jeff to leave the house these days since he has no job, he just bums around all day; so anytime he's gone I make sure to take advantage of it. I rushed in the front door, I had no idea when he was supposed to be back, and I wanted to play some music. I couldn't risk doing it while he was home, because he hated it, and I was constantly afraid he'd smash my instruments into smithereens. I always made sure I hid them in the back of my closet, I coulnd't risk leaving them out where he could destroy them.

I slammed the front door shut, then decided to turn around and lock it. I prayed that he'd forgotten his key and wouldn't be able to get back inside the house, because I sure as hell wouldn't be letting him in. He could sleep on the porch for all I cared. I dashed up the stairs and made my way to the tiny room at the end of the hall. My room was nothing special, just a few band posters, and nick knacks scattered throughout. I grabbed my beat up lap top and positioned it on my desk, then headed into the depths of my closet to dig out my guitar. I also had my keyboard hidden back there, but no drums. It pissed me off because there's no way I could fit my drum set in here, so Jetta allows me to stash it in her basement for now. It's been about a month since I've been able to play them.

Gripping my guitar tightly, I examined it's tattered appearance; it was old and had a few scars of it's own, but it was my baby and I loved it. I hopped onto my bed and leaned forward to hit the record button on my laptop. For the past three months, I'd been recording myself and posting the videos on YouTube. I hadn't been getting too many hits though, because I refuse to show my face, but I didn't really care about that, I uploaded the videos for myself, and didn't care who did or didn't see them.  After taking a moment to position the camera so that all that was showing was my mouth and below, I crawled back onto my bed, positioning my guitar comfotably on my lap. I began strumming the first few chords to the song that I'd been working on for the past few nights. I'd started writing it months ago, and only recently found the inspiration to finish it:

_"I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut_   
_My weakness is that I care too much_   
_And my scars remind me that the past is real_   
_I tear my heart open just to feel_   
  
_Drunk and I'm feeling down_   
_And I just wanna be alone_   
_I'm pissed cause you came around_   
_Why don't you just go home_   
_Cause you channel all your pain_   
_And I can't help you fix yourself_   
_You're making me insane_   
_All I can say is_   
  
_I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut_   
_My weakness is that I care too much_   
_And our scars remind us that the past is real_   
_I tear my heart open just to feel_   
  
_I tried to help you once_   
_Against my own advice_   
_I saw you going down_   
_But you never realized_   
_That you're drowning in the water_   
_So I offered you my hand_   
_Compassion's in my nature_   
_Tonight is our last stand_   
  
_I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut_   
_My weakness is that I care too much_   
_And our scars remind us that the past is real_   
_I tear my heart open just to feel_   
  
_I'm drunk and I'm feeling down_   
_And I just wanna be alone_   
_You shouldn't ever come around_   
_Why don't you just go home?_   
_Cause you're drowning in the water_   
_And I tried to grab your hand_   
_And I left my heart open_   
_But you didn't understand_   
_But you didn't understand_   
  
_Go fix yourself_   
_I can't help you fix yourself_   
_But at least I can say I tried_   
_I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life_   
_I can't help you fix yourself But at least I can say I tried_   
_I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life_

_I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut_   
_My weakness is that I care too much_   
_And our scars remind us that the past is real_   
_I tear my heart open just to feel"_

As I finished the last note, I noticed my voice was quivering, but I felt relieved... it's how I always felt after I'd completed a song. I sat there for a moment, zoning out as a smile lingered on my lips, but I snapped out of it when I realized that the camera was still recording. "Oops," I spoke out loud to myself. I stood up quickly so that I would be out of the cameras view frame and walked up to it, shutting it off. I don't edit my videos, I don't have the time or the patience for that. I don't even re-watch them before uploading them. So I simply opened my web browser and after logging onto YouTube, I went to the upload page and considered what to put in the description.

After thinking for a moment, I finally settled on simply saying, " _'Scars'_ written and preformed by Danning Carly. Copyright 2013." I refused to use my real name as well... I mean it's not like I chose a name that hid my identity very well... but it was still better then throwing my real name onto youtube.

I clicked the upload button and watched the screen intently as it did it's thing. After it finished, I clicked around a bit, seeing if there were any new videos about the boys, but nothing caught my eye. I debated on checking my twitter... I hadn't logged on in a few weeks, on account of I only have like eight followers, but I shrugged my shoulders and decided against it. Twitter just really annoys me and I've never been a big fan of it. It's obviously more geared towards celebrities who have fans that would like to know what they're doing, but honestly... I'm not going to retweet someone who says "I broke a nail." Seriously, I saw that retweeted thousands of times before. People who think that's important really need to reevaluate their priorities in life.  I closed my laptop and fell back onto my pillow, with my arms resting behind me, cradling my head.

I found myself stuck in my own mind again as I got swallowed up in my wandering thoughts. Although I kept trying to steer my thinking into a different direction, it just kept coming back to this afternoon at the signing. Did he do it out of pity? Did he do it because it would look good for his image? I immediately felt bad for thinking these things... I felt like I knew Niall, and I don't think he'd do something like that just to boost his Hollywood image.... but still in the pit of my stomach, I could just see the headline in some tabloid with a picture of my pathetic crying face as Niall kisses my wrists out of pity. God, I think I would die if that happened. I should have been more aware of my surroundings at the time... because what if someone took a picture? Or worse, what if someone video taped what happened? There were hundreds of girls there, and I'm pretty sure every single one of them, aside from myself, had their cameras out. I squeezed my eyes shut as a feeling of dread lurked across my heart. For a minute I almost felt like going to the blade for comfort, but I denied myself. I needed to stop.

"Nothing has happened yet, don't get ahead of yourself," I reminded myself, speaking freely into my empty room. As I felt my body beginning to relax again after my mini panic attack, I was startled when I heard the shrill ringing of my house phone. After bringing my hand to my chest and trying to convince myself to chill out, I rolled over onto my stomach and grabbed the receiver.

"Hello?" I asked hesitantly.

I heard a small giggle, 'Why do you always answer the phone like the girl from Scream?" Jetta asked bluntly.

I felt a small smile twitch on my lips as I rolled over onto my back again, "I don't know, I guess I just don't like the fact that we don't have caller I.D," I answered, honestly. Although that was the truth, the reason I answered the phone like that was because I was terrified of some of the people my stepdad associated himself with. They were bad people, some worse than him, and I've had more than enough experiences with them. I swiped a single tear that teetered on the brink of my eyelash before it could fall. I'm not going to cry about those memories. I refuse to.

Jetta snapped me back to the present when I heard her repeating my name, "Chan! Hello! Are you there?" she was asking, somewhat worriedly.

"Sorry, just tuned out for a second," I said as I cleared my throat.

"So....." she trailed off.

"So.....?" I asked back, faking confusion.

"Don't play dumb, you ass! Did you talk to them? Did you give Niall the letters? Were they nice? Did they fall in love with you? Are you going to get married and have little Irish babies?" Jetta shot off question after question until I had to yell her name to get her to stop.

"Jet! Will you chill out?" I asked her, as I tried to stop laughing. Sometimes she just gets so carried away.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly, "but before you spill about your story, I'll share mine, since yours is going to be better," she laughed.

"Okay, so how was the meet?" I asked.

"It actually went pretty well, I did the 200 meter fly and came in third place... I mean, it wasn't my finest hour but at least I wasn't last," she said somewhat defensively. She always got nervous that people would judge her so she usually got defensive even when it wasn't warranted.

"Jetta! Shut up that's amazing! Especially since that's not usually your event!" I encouraged her happily.

She reluctantly agreed, "Yeah, I guess you're right. I probably would have done better though had I not had my goggles too loose. Right when I dove in, the little fuckers got pushed down a little and some water got in them. It was pretty excruciating, actually. I was so glad when it was all over, because I was sure that I'd came in last since I could hardly see anything," she rambled on.

I waited patiently for her to finish her ranting, "Seriously, Jetta, that's awesome, okay?" I said forcefully so that she'd just accept it and move on.

"Yeah, yeah," she brushed me off, "But now tell me how your day went. God I wish I could have been there... but I guess I'm glad I wasn't or I probably would have embarrassed you with my fangirling."

I started laughing at the truth of her statement, I actually hadn't considered that before. I guess I am glad she wasn't there because it probably would have been really hard to have that serious moment with the boys, had my insane best friend been standing next to me smiling like a deranged buffoon the whole time, "Now that you remind me of that, I guess I'm glad you couldn't come," I agreed.

"Okay, so spill. Tell me everything!" she exclaimed.

I filled her in on all the pre-meeting bull crap: all the annoying girls who were screaming, the amount of time I waited, the girls who were behind me that kept giving me dirty looks, then finally when I was about to talk about walking up to the boys' table I stopped for a dramatic pause.

"Channing! Come onnn, you're killing me!" she hollered into the phone.

I smiled and began to tell her everything that happened upon meeting the boys, it was actually a very serious five minutes, where she didn't interrupt me at all. By the time I got to the part where Niall kissed my scars and whispered to me, she cut me off, "YOU ARE LYING!" she gasped.

"No I'm so serious. I swear on my guitar," I insisted. She knew the love I had for my guitar, so she didn't question me any further. Once I finished the story, she took a few minutes to collect herself. After a few long moments of complete silence on both ends, I voiced my concern.

"Do you think he did that... y-you know, just because he felt sorry for me? Or because he hoped that people would see and it would make him look like a nice guy?" I asked reluctantly.

She seemed to take a few seconds to think of her response, "Actually Channing, from the way they all responded to you, I don't think it was an act. I mean, I've never heard of them doing that before. You can't be the first person who's self-harmed that's seen them. I'm sure they've seen it before, and yeah they probably felt sorry for those girls... but, maybe because of the fact you seemed so sincere and told them you just wanted to meet THEM. Not their celebrity images... maybe that's why they showed such concern," she paused for minute before adding, "it's like you were trying to be a friend, not a fan."

I sat back and let her words soak in, and immediately felt like a weight was being lifted from my shoulders. Although my best friend was ditzy and a bit overzealous, she was incredibly wise. I felt a small smile playing at my lips, but then her next question caught me off guard and the security I had been feeling completely unravelled, "Chan, did you cut last night?" she asked softly.

I hadn't revealed that part, but I guess she figured it out. Considering the fact I hardly cut my wrists so the only reason Niall would have noticed was because the cuts were fresh.

Shame and remorse washed over me as my words caught in my throat and Jetta responded, "Channing you promised!" she said in a hurt voice. I knew she'd be angry, she was mad every time I did it.

"I--I'm s-sorry," I choked out, but I felt the hot tears streaming down my face.

"What did he do?" she asked, her voice tinged with emotion. I took a few minutes to calm down enough to speak. Ever since Jetta found out I'd been cutting three months ago, she was always trying to watch over me, and protect me. She knew about my family's past with suicide, and although I constantly insisted that I'd never take things that far, she never stopped trying to get me to stop.

I was about to speak when all of a sudden I heard the door slam from downstairs, panic immediately rose in my chest and I scurried off my bed, cracking my door open to look down the stairs; I saw three pairs of feet between the spindles and soft murmuring was traveling up the steps. I silently shut my door and grabbed my guitar, laptop and, messenger bag, immediately heading for my closet. I could hear Jetta repeatedly asking me what was wrong,

"Hang on," I whispered in a panicked voice.

I looked around my room for any traces of life, I had to make sure he didn't know I was home. I turned off the fan by my bed and picked my skateboard up off the floor and dashed back over to my closet, just as I heard multiple footsteps trampling up the stairs. I threw all of my stuff in the corner of the closet, covering them up with some old winter coats and scrambled to the farthest corner of the tiny room. I climbed over a pile of blankets and coats that I had up exactly for occasions like this.

"Jetta I have to go in case he tries to use the phone, it's a code 15," I said softly before hanging up the cordless phone and burying myself under the blankets and coats. I was small enough to where it honestly just looked like a pile of blankets in my closet; this had been my hiding spot from Jeff for years now, because he was obviously a complete idiot. Jetta knew that if I said it was a 'Code 15' then that meant I was hiding in my closet. We'd come up with code words in case I was in a bad situations at home. It really depressed me when I thought about it because normal friends make up code words for silly reasons, or to talk about crushes... whereas, I had to make them up to explain horrible and dangerous situations that were going on in my life.

I froze and held my breath when I heard my bedroom door creak open and the sound of heavy footsteps enter the room. I jumped when I heard Jeff's nasally voice yell my name. My heart was about to beat right out of my chest and I just squeezed my eyes shut and curled into the a ball, hugging my knees to my chest. I felt wetness on my cheeks again, as I tried to get my mind off the last time he brought strangers into our home... and into my room. I whispered silent prayers to a God who I wasn't even sure existed as I heard soft mumbling traveling under the closet door.

"Bitch should be home by now, I told her to stop fucking around and come straight home," Jeff slurred harshly. He was obviously drunk.

"Well, we can't wait all night, we'll just have to go elsewhere," an unknown mans voice sounded, chills clawed up my body at the sound of his deep, cold voice.

"Fuck!" Jeff cursed loudly.

I stopped breathing entirely when I heard footsteps approaching my closet door. Light spilled into the dark room as the door was pushed open. Since Jeff didn't see anything he quickly left the closet and went to my bathroom. After deciding I wasn't in the room, I heard him speak again, "When can you come back? Next time, I'll make sure she's here, even if I have to tie her down myself," he spoke, hatred leaking from his heart right into his words.

I felt more tears cascading down my cheeks and I tried hard to not make any sniffling noises. I heard some more grumbling before the heavy footfalls clomped out of my room and back down the stairs. I lay there under the pile of blankets for a little longer, just to make sure the coast was clear. I just stared into the darkness from under the blanket, feeling my head growing slightly dizzy from breathing in my own carbon dioxide, and I just kept asking myself why I deserved this. I've always tried to be a good person, I've always tried to help anyone who needed it; so why do I feel like I'm being punished?

Before I could do anymore self analyzing, I heard a familiar tapping at my window;

_TAP TAP TAP_ . _TAP TAP TAP_  . _TAP TAP_

I jumped up from under my blankets and hurried over to my window, where I saw my best friend sitting on the tree limb that extended out to almost touch my window. I hurriedly unlocked it, ripping it open, as she quickly tumbled inside, enveloping me in a hug. I squeezed her close to me and she pulled back for a second, taking a look at me.

"Are you okay?" she asked, close to tears.

"He didn't find me," I said simply, as I looked down to the floor.

She pulled me towards her again and I sobbed onto her shoulder, she was taller by a few inches, so it always felt like she took on a motherly role comforting a small child in these situations.

"His truck isn't out there, I waited by the side of the house until he left," she whispered in my hair since we were still hugging. I sighed in relief, hoping he had left to go to the bar and drown himself in alcohol.

Jetta then gave me a look and took hold of my hands so that she could inspect my wrists, as she did I saw her eyes grow glossy, "Chan! This one's too deep! You can't do it that deeply!" She said angrily, looking me in the eye.

"I know, I wasn't paying attention," I said, trying to look anywhere but at her pissed off face.

"What happened?" she asked softly and her eyes turned gentle as she waited for my response.

I sat down on my bed, kicked off my shoes and socks, and held my heel in my lap. She sat next to me so she could see it.

"Oh my God! How did he do that? It looks horrible!" she gasped. I had to admit, it did look worse today than it did yesterday. The skin on my foot was peeling off and the blisters looked red and angry. It also seemed swollen.  I played it off as if it didn't hurt though, I didn't want to worry Jetta anymore than she already was.

"It's not that bad, he just got pissed because I burnt the pizza last night," I stated while playing with the fabric at the bottom of my shorts.

"Wait... he burned you with a pizza pan... because you burned a fucking pizza?!" she exclaimed. I nodded meekly and shrugged my shoulders. After I explained to her the way he dragged me back into the kitchen and that's how he was able to burn my foot, she immediately stood and walked over to my dresser, grabbing random clothing and shoving them into a bag.

"What're you doing?" I asked her, curiously.

"Your foot needs to get looked at and my Mom's off duty, she doesn't have to be at the hospital until 6am," she said simply, "So you're coming to my house. I don't want to hear any bitching about it Channing, you need to get out of here tonight," she said forcefully as she turned around to look at me.

Jetta's mother was a nurse and had actually examined quite a few of my bumps and bruises I acquired from my "clumsiness." I didn't put up a fight, I just quickly hugged her and ran into my closet to get the things I'd just hidden away. After packing some clothes and some essentials, Jetta headed out of my room holding my bag while I grabbed my laptop and skateboard.

We hurried down the street, well she tried to hurry and I could barely speed walk; she insisted I sit on the curb and wait for her, so that's what I did. After a few minutes, Jetta pulled up in her red Geo Tracker, and we sped off, leaving my dark, gloomy house in reckless abandon. After we reached Jetta's home, we had her mom look at my foot, I just stated that I'd stepped on my straightener. She properly cleaned the burn, covered it in ointment and gave me an ice pack after she bandaged it up.

After saying goodnight to her mother, we made our way to Jetta's room which was towards the back of the house. We hadn't spoken much since we'd gotten here, and I couldn't help the feeling that she was mad at me, so I decided not to push her. After we got changed into some pyjamas, I excused myself to the bathroom so to brush my teeth.

When I got back to her room, she had already turned the light off, so I quietly crept across the floor and gently climbed into the open side of the bed. She was rolled over, facing away from me; I wasn't sure if she was actually tired, or just mad at me. I rolled away from her, deciding it was better not to make things worse by trying to talk to her. After a few minutes I started to hear sniffling and I quickly rolled over to see what was wrong; she didn't roll over immediately.

"Why do you stay there, Channing? Why don't you leave?" she asked me softly, her voice sounded raspy from her tears. I stared at the back of her head, examining the straight golden locks. I hated when she asked me this question, I'm not sure why she still bothered, I'd already told her many times the reason why I stayed.

"I can't leave my mom, Jetta. You know that," I said swallowing and trying to keep my voice from shaking. She slowly rolled over to face me, and I saw the trails on her cheeks that her tears left behind.

"I'm just so worried about you..." she trailed off, "your cutting is getting worse. Every time you promise to stop, you don't... in fact you seem to do it worse the next time. I don't know what to do anymore..." she finished as she broke into a sob.

I could feel my throat hurting as I tried to keep my tears at bay, because I knew that if I broke down right now, it would be like a tsunami wave, and I didn't want to put that on Jetta, "I'm sorry. I really am," I whispered, afraid if I said anymore the floodgates would break.

It was dark in the room, but I could still make out the disappointed look she gave me, and I knew she deserved a better answer than that, so that's when I decided to let myself go. Jetta was the only person I had in the world right now, aside from my imaginary friendship with Niall. For some reason thinking about Niall made me start crying even more. Numerous times in my letters I'd promised him that I was going to stop cutting. I'd broken my promises to Niall just as I had done with Jetta. I began gasping for breath as I felt the panic settling into my chest and I brought my hands to my face as if I were trying to block the tears from escaping my eyes. I was making choking noises, and I felt so bad as I glanced at Jetta's alarmed face. She immediately pulled me towards her and hugged me tightly, trying to comfort me. I was so lucky to have her in my life. Without her, I'd literally have no one.

"Shhh, shhh, Channing. It's okay, I'm here, alright?" she whispered as she tried to calm me down, but it was no use, I was broken and it'd take a lot more than some reassuring words to patch up the hole in my shield. She just hugged me to her, and gently began humming. After a few minutes I could feel my eyes growing heavy and my sobs had stopped so I was just sniffling every few minutes.

"I'm sorry, Jetta. Thank you so much for putting up with all my crap," I mumbled sleepily, as I closed my heavy eyelids.

She let out a little strained laugh, "Chan, what are best friends for?" she asked, although she wasn't expecting an answer I gave her one anyway, "You're not my best friend, Jetta." I said bluntly, "You're my sister." I whispered as I felt the strong, welcoming arms of slumber pull me into its depths.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

A few minutes after Jetta had called me her sister, I heard her breathiing begin to grow steady, and the sniffling, which had come from the aftermath of her crying had completely stopped. I hugged her for a little longer, knowing that she needed to feel that security. She'd been missing the feeling of love and safey from her life for a while now. Although I'd only known her for three years, I felt like I'd grown up with Channing. We were extremely close, and I just loved the fact that no matter what she was doing, she'd drop everything if I needed her. So, I tried to do the same for her. After about ten minutes, I gently pulled away from her and silently crept out of the bed. I headed toward my dresser where I had heard my phone vibrating a few minutes ago. After unlocking the screen and putting it right in front of my face since I'd already taken my contacts out, I squinted at the small writing in the text message, I smiled when I realized it was from my brother;

_Jeremy: Check twitter NOW!_

What the hell? Why does he want me to check twitter? I hadn't been on it at all today since I was busy with swim and taking care of Channing. I was about to just blow him off, since the last time he tried to show me something on Twitter, it was just concerning a bunch of weirdos who were taking pictures of themselves eating shit and posting it, since apparently some slightly famous guy told them to. I was like really, Jeremy? Jeremy was three years older than me, but I swear he acts like a child.I debated whether or not I wanted to bother, but eventually, my curiosity won and tip toed over to my desktop computer since I didn't want to squint at my phones tiny screen. I grabbed my glasses off of my nightstand and carefully took a seat in my desk chair, trying to me quiet so I wouldn't wake Channing.

As I pulled up the web browesr, I absentmindedly began biting my nails, which was a bad habit I'd picked up from Channing. I pulled my fingers out of my mouth and took a hold of my mouse when the page loaded and began clicking on my mentions. What I saw about had my eyes popping out of my head.

Jeremy had retweeted a tweet about twenty minutes ago, and I just stared at my screen because I couldn't believe eyes. My phone vibrated on my desk again and I quickly reached for it and gazed down at the text message, _"Check the trends"_

My eyebrow popped up as I clicked over to the 'discover' tab and scrolled down to the worldwide trends; the top two trending topics about had me falling out of my chair.

**#FindChanning**

**#DidNiallFindHisPrincess**

After sitting there, gawking at the screen for a few minutes with my mouth hanging open, I hesitantly clicked on the hashtags, and what I saw there was the same tweet my brother had retweeted earlier plus another;

**@NiallOfficial Chan, im here please contact me. <3>**

**@NiallOfficial -C- you'll never treat yourself right darlin, but i want you to. if i let you know im here for you, maybe you'll love yourself like i love you. -Ni xx #FindChanning**

I just sat there frozen... completely unsure of what to do. For some reason my brain wouldn't let me believe it, even though the proof was sitting here, staring me right in the face. Did she really have that big of an affect on him? Don't get me wrong, I know Niall is a sweetheart, but there are just soooo many girls vying for his attention... and he's a worldwide celebrity. How could he be concerned with some girls problems from a random suburb of Saint Louis?

The very thought of Niall reaching out to Chan gave me butterflies because of the amount of excitement I felt for her. I turned around and studied my best friend's' sleeping form. I wanted to wake her up, I wanted to show her this. I needed to show her that someone else cared... that she was important and worthy of love.


	5. Broken but Beautiful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys read another letter, and they also see some videos posted on youtube of what happened between Niall and Channing during the signing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of these early chapters are going to have a lot of "letter reading" in them so you can get a feel for what Channing has been through. Just letting you know... as the chapters go on, you won't be reading so many letters lol... also I promise they will be meeting up again soon.

**Niall's P.O.V**

When I'd finally finished in the shower I trudged into the lounge area only to see the rest of the boys huddled around the coffee table, all looking down. At first I didn't know what they were up to, but then I heard the slight shuffling of papers and that's when I realized I'd left Channing's letter out in the open. I approached them, tentatively looking over Zayn's shoulder. At first they didn't recognize my presence, but after a moment I suppose Zayn noticed me lurking and glanced back, meeting my gaze. His sympathetic eyes took in my sad ones and he slowly got to his feet and enveloped me in a hug.

"Mate, it'll be okay, I know it's hard to read these letters... But remember she was strong enough to make it through anything that may have happened to her," he said reassuringly while he kept his arm slung over my shoulder.

When I looked back at the rest of the boys, they were staring back at me; obviously noticing our exchange.

Liam stepped forward next and brought his hand to my other shoulder in a comforting gesture, "Have you read anymore," he asked, a slight hesitation weighing in his words. I knew he was referring to the rest of Channing's letters, so I slowly shook my head. In all honesty I was afraid of what I'd find in the next letter, and every letter thereafter.

"Well, Channing's counting on you to  hear her story," he encouraged. Leave it to Liam to be the responsible one.

"Yeh, I know. I'm jus weary of what I meh find in tha rest of 'em," I answered timidly, looking down.

"Where are they?" Harry asked, quickly rising from the couch. I pointed back toward my room and simply replied, "Ni'stand."

Harry nodded once and disappeared through my doorway. Louis spoke up next, "Nialler, we brought you back some spaghetti, it's on the counter."

Any other time I would have already sniffed the food out and been done eating, but at the moment I just wasn't in the mood.

"Tanks, I'll put it in dah fridge fer later," I said softly as I wandered toward the kitchen and proceeded to put the food away. I did grab a beer though before heading back to the lounge. As I reentered the room, I noticed that Harry was back and holding the envelope in his hand. Liam had Channing's second letter folded up and handed it to me as I took the open seat next to him. Harry held out the envelope for me to take, and reluctantly I reached out for it and took out the rest of the letters.

After taking a second to collect myself, I gave my head a slight shake, trying to free myself of the cloud of foreboding that was settling on my shoulders. I opened the envelope and pulled out Channing's next letter;

_"October 31st - November 1st_

_Dear Niall,_

_It's been over a month since I've written you... but I guess you should consider that good news, because that meant things were going well for me. I'm sorry I only seem to write when things go wrong in my life, but that's when I feel like I need you the most. God, I need you right now. It's 5:13am, and I can't sleep after what happened tonight. I'm still shaking, but of course, I've no one to turn to. I'm actually huddled in my bathroom, with a chair jammed under the door... to keep HIM out. It's funny how I feel like I'm bothering you when you don't even see these letters! Ugh, there is something wrong with my mind, I'm telling you. So I guess I should just get to the point... last night was Halloween... and it was pretty much the worse night of my life... and that's saying something. Jetta convinced me to come to a party with her, of course it was a costume party. Don't laugh, but I was dressed as a Power Ranger, the green one to be exact. It was a little slutty for my taste, but I just kept my jacket on so it was'nt that bad. Anyway, we got there around 9pm, so the place was still in full party mode. Now, let me tell you something about myself... I am not a party girl. This is actually the second party I ever attended, in my life._

_So we got to the party and everyone was pretty drunk and ridiculous... Jetta actually met up with her boyfriend, they've been together for months now... so I was alright with that. I figured I could just hang out and people watch. Well I was wrong. I couldn't have been more wrong. After we'd been there for about an hour, I'd had a few drinks of my own, not enough to be seriously hammered... but enough to feel warmth on my cheeks and a boost in my confidence. I was laughing with a few girls from my school... I'm not one who makes friends easily, and they convinced me to meet them in an upstairs guest room because they were playing party games with some other people. I honestly don't believe these girls had any bad intentions toward me, they had no way of knowing what would happen, I think they were just being friendly to me, and I, like a desperate fool, accepted the offer graciously._

_Well when we got up to the guest room, I noticed the room had about ten other people hanging around. It was somewhat dark though, so it was hard to get a good look at who was in the there. We decided to play spin the bottle (juvenile, I know), but it wasn't so bad. I had had a few more drinks by this point, and I was really starting to feel relaxed with these people. Spin the bottle only lasted for about an hour, thankfully I only had to kiss two boys, (and one girl)... someone suggested we play truth or dare. It really didn't bother me at the time, in fact, I was excited. Remember sadly, this was the first time I'd actually ever participated in drunken party games, and for a split second, I almost felt like I belonged._

_Both truths and dares were being handed out to random people; but mostly, many gross, funny, disturbing, and  inappropriate dares. Then finally it was my turn, and it was at that moment who I realized was giving me my dare. My band mate I was telling you about in my last letter, Tate."_

As soon as I read his name, I immediately felt a sickness growing in my stomach and my hands started to clench the paper, crumbling the edges, "Shit," I let out an exasperated sigh as I dropped the paper and began rubbing my hands up and down my face. I knew where this was going to go, and I didn't want to read it. I felt so helpless and insignificant reading these letters. It's killing me. Liam saw my distressed state and picked up the letter, after glancing at me to make sure it was alright, he continued reading;

_"I was surprised to see him there because in all honestly, I'd been avoiding the band. My other band mates were getting mad at me, but I couldn't be around him. The last time I tried to go to a practice, he actually cornered me in the bathroom and came on to me. At that time I  was being pushed up against the sink but luckily someone came down the hallway and Tate backed off, so I grabbed my shit and got the hell out of there, not even giving them an explanation. So I could tell by just looking at him that he thought he was going to get his way this time._

_'Well, well well, if it isn't Channing! Where you been girl?' He had asked me, trying to sound funny in front of the other people in the room. I remember I just glared back at him without speaking._

_'Well, I think I'll give you your dare, how's that sound?' he said, and the smile on his face was down right sadistic. However, at the time, I had that liquid courage in my veins, so I wasn't afraid of him and thought that I could handle whatever he tried to dish out._

_'You come in the closet with me for ten minutes, not interruptions,' he had an evil smirk as he stared at me and let his eyes roam down my body. UGH NIALL, I WAS SO SO STUPID. I'M SORRY. i PROBABLY DESERVED WHAT HAPPENED, IT WAS ALL MY FAULT FOR TRYING TO PROVE I WASN'T AFRAID OF HIM._

_I remember thinking, 'what could it hurt' to myself at the time. I'd just go with him into the closet, kiss him for a few minutes and leave, hopefully he would lay off after that. I mean, there was a room full of people, so I figured that would be enough of a safety net if anything got too serious. GOD I WAS SO WRONG. I should have known it couldn't be that simple. I should have known he'd have his ways to shut me up._

_I accepted the challenge and followed him into the closet, hearing the crowd "ooooh" as he shut the sliding doors behind us. He approached me slowly so I was almost fooled for a second into thinking this would be easy."_

I was sitting there on the couch fidgeting as Liam read the letter, but he finally paused as he noticed I was about to explode. The other boys didn't look much better, they all looked pissed off and helpless like me. I didn't want to, but I had to hear the rest of it, "Go 'head," I said forcefully to Liam and waved my hand so that he'd continue;

_"I'm sorry if I'm making you feel awkward... or shitty, my imaginary friend. I don't mean to. I'll try not to go into detail, but I just need to get this off my chest before it drags me down and I end up using this razor I've been gripping in my hand for the past hour. I'm so close to cutting Niall._

_So he comes slowly up to me and at first kisses me really gently on the mouth, so I kind of relax a little and let my guard down. After about thirty seconds of kissing him, I felt my back against the wall, and realized that he'd been backing me up so that he could trap me in. He now had his arms placed firmly on either side of my head and he pulled away from me, looking me in the eye. I saw a glint in his eyes that chilled me to the bone, he looked like a wild animal. I immediately tried to duck under his arm, but he blocked my path and threw me against the wall more forcefully so that my head slammed backwards and I let out a small yelp. He quickly put his hand over my mouth and kept it glued there as he reached for the buttons on my blouse. With one quick motions, he ripped his hand down the front, causing the shirt to immediately split open. At this point he'd forced us to the floor and was pinning me to the ground as he kept his hand clamped over my mouth. I was trying to scream and cry and kick while he just sat their laughing at my meager attempts to break free of him._

_'Just shut the fuck up, whore' he whispered vehemently into my face. He was kissing my neck and feeling me up and trying to undo my pants; Niall, I'd never been more helpless or afraid in my life. I was choking on my own sobs when someone finally opened the door from the outside, laughing. Tate immediately drew away from me and played it off as if nothing happened, but I just scrambled to my feet and pushed past the rest of the people in room as I tried desperately to hold my shirt together over my chest. I heard a few snickers as I left the room as well as what sounded like a high five. I don't really know if the people in that room knew what was happening against my will, but no one seemed to notice my ripped shirt or tear stained cheeks, and I just hurried down the steps and out the front door. Why are people so cruel Niall? If someone needs help, why are we so reluctant to step in and help? I wouldn't think twice about helping someone if I saw them in that state of disarray._

_Of course that's not the end of my terrible night though, because as soon as I stepped foot into my home, Jeff was there waiting for me. He was quick to call me a whore as I stood there crying, still holding my shirt together; he said if I wasn't such a tease maybe 'shit like this wouldn't happen.' I DO NOT UNDERSTAND how his warped brain can think I'm a tease, I hardly talk to the man! All I know is I really wanted my mother, but she still wasn't home so I ran up the steps, so I could be alone. Jeff had other plans though because he followed me up the steps and when I tried to close my door on him he shoved me out of the way and forced me onto my bed. I was breaking down as he climbed on top of me and, pinning my arms against the bed, and grinding on top of me. The sounds that were coming out of my mouth did not sound human as I bawled my eyes out and gasped for breath. He smacked my face repeatedly demanding that I 'shut the hell up, because he's going to teach me what happens to girls who tease.' As soon as he whispered those horrifying words into my face, he started kissing me, trying to pull my mouth open with his revolting tongue, and rubbing his hands up and down my stomach. When he tried kissing me again I bit down on his bottom lip, HARD. He let out a yell and quickly jumped away from me, and I saw that his lip was bloody and swollen._

_Before I could get away, I saw him reach for me and drag me down to the foot of the bed; he brought his hands to my throat and was squeezing it so hard, I thought he was going to break my neck. It was the worst feeling in the world, Niall. I tried clawing at his hands to release me, but he seemed intent on ending it for me right there, and I began feeling the room swim as he mumbled profanities at me. Just as soon as I saw clouds of black invade my vision, he finally let go of me and the immediate relief I felt at being able to suck in the sweet oxygen was quickly replaced by the agonizing pain I left around my bruised neck. I was wheezing as I tried to catch my breath, and the burning in my throat hurt worse with each inhale. I was sitting up now and he was still standing there staring at me, when I tried to stand to get passed him, my legs gave out and I crumbled to the floor. I heard him laugh and he kneeled down so that he was again, right in my face. Before leaving he gave me a sick smile and said, 'We'll finish this later, I like it rough." Then he stood up and left the room without looking back._

_I crawled into my bathroom and just lay on the floor for a while staring at the ceiling as sobs racked my entire body. Niall, why can't you be here to hold me? To protect me? Why can't someone, ANYONE be here to do that? God I sound so selfish and needy, I'm sorry.  I'm just so alone, and it's so hard. Jetta still doesn't know much about my fucked up home life, and I really don't plan on telling her. I just need someone to tell me things will get better... that someday, things will be okay for me."_

Liam stopped reading at that point and took a look at the lot of us. We were all just sitting there, shock on our faces, and guilt weighing on our hearts. I know I didn't know Channing last fall, but it just kills me that while I was out... living my life, ENJOYING my life... she was huddled in her bathroom, crying and writing a letter to someone she'd never even met, because she had no one else. For a second, I was angry with her. Why me? Why did she have to pick me to lay this on? How am I supposed to enjoy anything, when in the back of my mind, I'll always be wondering if she's hurt, or scared, or alone... or if she's even alive. This girl is a stranger so why can't I just throw these stupid letters away and go on with my life? I wanted to. I really just wanted to take the rest of the notes and rip them all apart... but I knew I was lying to myself. There's no way I could do that now. She's right, why don't people ever try to step in if they see someone in pain? I know it's impossible to be able to help every single girl on the planet; but maybe... just maybe I could help her. Maybe I could mend her broken past and help her to start over. I was drawn out of my swirling thoughts when I heard Harry's deep voice.

"Ni, she didn't cut though, right? That's a good sign!" Harry said almost excitedly. I felt the weight on my heart lessen slightly, well,  that was until Liam spoke up and caused an anvil to fall back and crush it.

"Sorry guys, there's actually more," he said, sadness echoing through his voice, "she continued writing the next afternoon," he continued;

_"November 1st, 2013  2:30pm_

_"I'm sorry Niall, I tried not to cut last night, I really did. God, I'm so disgusting. I'm so happy you'll never have to know how disgusting I am. I cut my thighs last night... I actually did some research (I know, it's sad, really), and I've read that's the best place to cut. It's easier to hide, and not as life threatening if you go too deep. I don't really want to scar up my wrists. Ugh, but that doesn't matter, because I'm going to promise to stop. I need to find another way to cope. I'll let you know if I find one. I stayed home from school today because I have severe bruising around my neck and I have no idea how to hide it. I also can't sing at the moment, and that's what upsets me the most. My throat is so raw, I can barely get out a raspy whisper. Jeff has taken away so much from me: my mother, my happiness, my sense of security... but I'll die before he takes my voice._

_"It makes me sad that I'll never meet you, but at the same time... you wouldn't want to meet me... you wouldn't want to know me. I'm nobody. My problems would just lay a burden on you, and I could never do that to you, Nialler. You're so beautiful, carefree, adorable, and happy; I would never want to drag you into my Hell. You make me happy without even knowing. I honestly don't even know why... I mean, it's just you. Don't mean to bring "Up All Night" into this, but it's seriously everything about you. Your smile, your laugh, your eyes, your antics at concerts (not that I've ever been to one, but I watch them on YouTube), your shyness, your rosy Irish cheeks,  your accent, your singing, your VOICE. It's all perfect to me. I know you probably get hate from time to time, Niall, but just know that no matter what they say I cannot fathom the existence of someone more perfect than you. God, I'm so glad you'll never see this, or you will probably think I'm an obsessed stalker fan. I promise I'm not. I just love you, all of your quirks, faults, and qualities. Everything._

_"I know I'm not alone.. I know I'm not the only one who is broken. Those other girls who have my same problem... I'm not better than any of them. I cry for myself and I cry for them every night, because I know there are people who are still worse off than I am. I don't know if I believe in God, but I believe that it's important to be a good person, regardless. I will always help anyone who needs it, and even though you're a celebrity, I hope that you will do the same. We're all hurting, in one way or another. So I should really consider that when I write to you. I'm sorry if you have any problems in your life right now, I shouldn't be so quick to assume that your life is easy or perfect. But if by some miracle, you ever find these letters and read them... just remember, that although I may be hurting, I'm also STILL here... and that's because of you._

_Love, Chan xo"_

After Liam read the final line, we seemed to let out a collective sigh.

"Oh my God," Louis voiced out loud to no one in particular.

Zayn cleared his throat, "She has a really beautiful outlook on life, doesn't she? I've never known a person who deals with so much shit, yet still makes a point to say there are other people in the world with problems worse than hers," he finished as he looked up thoughtfully at nothing in particular.

"Yeah she's really... insightful," Liam agreed as he played with the letter still in his hands.

"Niall, you alright?" Harry asked from across the room, he was standing in the kitchen holding a beer as well.

I sat in silence for a moment, studying my hands; I let out a humorless laugh, "Not at'all," I said, looking up to meet their questioning gazes.

We just sat there, in a tense, shared silence. Nobody knew what to do or say to make the situation seem better, but that's probably because there was no way to make this situation better. If anything, every second that passed just made things worse because I wasn't DOING ANYTHING to make it better.

Harry was still standing off toward the kitchen and I noticed him clicking around on his phone. I'd sent that tweet out about two hours ago, and still hadn't checked twitter since. Truth be told, I was afraid of the things I would see on my feed. Reluctantly I grabbed my phone and decided to take a look, but before I could, Harry shouted, startling us all. I watched his eyes grow wide as he brought his phone closer to his face. Shit. What now?

"What's tha matteh?" I asked hesitantly.

Harry glanced up for a second and abruptly began striding over to the couch, "Look at this," he said animatedly as he thrust his phone into my face. It took a second for my eyes to adjust, but when they did, a familiar tug pulled at my heartstrings as I watched the screen. There was a girl with long dark waves, an Obey snap back, holding a skateboard, she was sitting in line, with a mass of other girls and I knew this had to be the video that the other fan told me she would DM me. Well, I guess she got too antsy and just decided to let it go viral. Shit. It was being retweeted by fans everywhere, and I noticed a new trend **#WhenNiallMetChanning** , as well as another, **#WeShipChialler**. I shook my head, but couldn't help the small smile that crept onto my face... our fans shipped me with everything, since I'd never actually been in a relationship. Last year, I remember being shipped with things as ridiculous as a leaf and a taxi. Being shipped with Channing though... it made me smile. I just hoped she wouldn't think it was weird. We all looked on intently at Harry's phone as we watched the video, it was about just over eight minutes long.

The video started off with the girls talking excitedly as they stood in line, Channing was in the background. I tried to ignore the girls' annoying voices and focus on Chan. The video was pretty choppy, as there were a lot of time jumps from probably hitting and stopping the record button all day. At one point the girl could be heard mumbling about Channing, "Check out this skater," the girl said in a stupid voice. Then they subtly recorded Channing as she shifted on her feet, obviously trying to relieve the pressure from the one she had been limping on. She had her ear buds in and wasn't paying any attention to the girls.

A few minutes later was from a new perspective, the girls with the video camera were now sitting on the ground, while Channing was still standing. The girls were taping each other and talking about what they would say to us when they got to the table, but Channing could be seen in the background. She really did look beautiful. Like one of those beautiful tomboys... the kind of girls I liked, no make up, low maintenance, and easy going. I felt a stupid grin on my face as she decided to plop down on her skate board next the girls with the video camera. She gave a sheepish smile and then lay back on her board. The whole time she looked to be deep in thought, and I really wanted to know what was going through her mind, but then again, on second thought, maybe I didn't.

The video then cut to when the girls were standing by the signing table, next in line to walk up to it. As they taped us, they obviously were taping Channing as well since she was ahead of them. I watched on in awe as she first walked up to Louis, you could make out the huge smile from her side profile. Their exchange was actually really cute; Louis gave her a look and asked her a question but she shrugged her shoulders and rose her arms, showing that her hands were empty.

Louis spoke up, "That's when I asked her if she had anything for us to sign, and she acted all embarrassed and shy when she said 'no'," he informed us with a smirk.

I watched as she spoke, happiness radiating off of her smile and that's when I noticed she'd gotten the attention from all of us at the table. I spied myself at the very end, looking at Channing, trying to figure her out. She went on to speak to each of the boys, and they all offered her a hug as well. By the time she got to Harry and I, the girls that were recording had also approached the table and were trying to tape Louis and talk to him, but he seemed distracted since he kept trying to see what was going on at the end of the table.

As if on queue, the girl that was recording turned and kept her camera on us at the end of the table. The crowd had also quieted down considerably once they realized an intimate moment was happening. The camera zoomed in on us, and you could barely make out our muffled voices. I watched as she tried to hand me the letter, and then felt my stomach drop as I witnessed myself stand up abruptly and grab her wrist, pulling it closer to my face. At the time I hadn't been looking at her face, so as the video played, I examined her reaction, and she looked... terrified. Her eyes grew wide and shiny as she tried to pull her hand free from me.

I watched as she began to let her walls crack a little once she saw my look of concern. You could barely make out my words because of the terrible sound quality, but I heard them perfectly as I watched myself pull her wrist to my lips. I closed my eyes and kissed it gently, before opening them again to her broken, but beautiful face. I saw how much she was trying to keep it together, and I felt a tug on my heart all over again.

"Please stop, I love you," I had said to her, but I'm not entirely sure why I'd said it. Of course I loved all of our fans, but the pull I felt towards her was different, and at the time I just felt like it was something that she needed to hear... and it was something I needed to say. The look of shock that shone on her face after my words was almost comical. Her eyes were wide and full of wonder, and that's when her walls came crumbling down; a few tears slipped out of her eyes and danced down her cheeks. I then pulled her in for a strong hug and it seemed like a long time before I released her, I'd buried my face into her neck, it was something I always seemed to do, it was unintentional, but apparently people liked it. After a few long moments she stepped back slightly and  handed me the dreaded envelope. We exchanged a few more words and she reached out squeezing me to her once again, and I remember at the time I was a bit confused about her intensity... but now that I've read some of those letters, I realize how important that meeting had been for her... how important I had been to her, and I didn't even know it.

She swiped the tears from her cheeks, the crowd was almost silent with just soft murmuring traveling throughout. The girl recording the video continued to tape me as I watched her limp away, and my heart lurched as I saw that, since now I knew it was probably because of something her stepfather did to her. I turned back toward the crowd after she'd disappeared around the corner, but the look on my face was a mix of confusion, curiosity, and sadness. I felt kind of sad just looking at myself like that, but snapped out of it when I saw my own eyes focus on the camera that was taping and beckon the girl who was taping over, that's when the video cut off.

"Niall, on the bright side, this will help you find her," Louie stated as he sat back down on the couch. I nodded my head slightly in agreement. I peeked at some of the comments and was pleased to find that they were almost all entirely positive. For that, I was happy. I didn't want her to receive hate for merely meeting me, because that's honestly all that happened.

"'Twas odd watchin' myself, yeh know?" I asked to no one in particular.

They all mumbled in agreement and I brought my hands to my mouth and began gnawing on my nails; it was something I always did when I was anxious. I continued looking through my mentions, hoping that somehow, I'd be able to find her.


	6. I'm Tired and it's Wintah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall channels his inner stalker and figures out a way to contact Channing (or at least Channing's friend Jetta) and gets the ball rolling on reuniting with Channing once again :)

**Channing's P.O.V**

The swirling visions taking place beneath my eyelids were a combination of fantasies and memories of the past. Some memories good, some bad. I was reliving a time when my mother and I were practicing on her guitar together when I heard my name being called and felt gentle shaking on my shoulder. I pried my eyes apart for a split second to see Jetta's face, mere inches away from mine. She had a mixture of excitement and nervousness etched into her expression as she continued to gently shake me, since I'd already closed my eyes again.

"Chan, come on! I really need to show you something," she whispered in my ear.

I rolled over slightly and grumbled, "But I'm tired and it's wintah."

Jetta started laughing, it was our go-to phrase when we didn't feel like doing something, much like Harry Styles didn't feel like getting his make up put on in that one video.

"Sleepyhead, it's not even winter! And I wanted to wake you hours ago, this is IMPORTANT," she said as she started repeatedly poking me in the cheek.

I peeled my eyes open again and looked at her alarm clock, "Jetta, it's freaking 6am. I don't think anything is important enough to drag my ass out of this bed right now... but nice try," I said in exasperation as I dragged the blankets over my head.

She didn't bother me anymore after that and I thought she was just going to leave me alone, so I started to actually drift back to sleep. After a few minutes, however, I felt a weight on the side of the bed and she threw the blankets off of me. I opened one eye and glared at her, she just smiled and reached for my face, squeezing my cheeks together so my mouth was contorted, "Channing, stop being a pain in the ass. I swear, this is going to make you shit yourself," she said, rather seriously.

I, however, began laughing, "Uh... OK Jetta... graphic." I reluctantly sat myself up so that my back was resting against the headboard, and Jetta swiftly dropped the laptop into my open lap.

"God what has you so excited?" I questioned, my voice dripping with irritation.

She just gave me a smug, closed mouth grin and motioned toward the screen.

I rolled my eyes and looked down, trying to focus on the small text.

Once my fuzzy morning vision began to clear and I could make out what exactly I was looking at, I honestly thought my eyeballs were about to pop out and roll off the bed. WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON.

Twitter was blowing up and from what I could see, a majority of the tweets had my name in them, as well as Niall's. I thought I was going to start hyperventilating.

"What is this..." I mumbled to myself as I clicked on a few different tweets and looked at them.

"Channing! Niall is looking for you! HE'S TRYING TO FIND YOU!" she said excitedly. For a split second, I allowed myself to fangirl, but the smile immediately slid off my face when I thought about how much exposure this was getting. Was he doing this because he really cared? Or did the band do it for publicity? Why would he bring such attention to this?

Jetta was still sitting next to me, buzzing in my ear with excitement as I sat, trapped in my mind, having a mini-freak out, "You have to reach out to him!" she said as she clapped her hands together, but I immediately began shaking my head back and forth.

The joy quickly melted away from her face and she gave me a strange look, "Wha-- What? Why!?" she asked, sounding surprised.

"Why the hell would he care enough about someone he doesn't even know, to begin a stupid search like this? This has to be to give the band attention. There's no way he would have time to bother with me. He's freaking Niall Horan. I'm not going to get my hopes up about this," I said, nothing but doubt running through my mind.

Jetta looked at me incredulously,"Channing! Listen to yourself! He hasn't done a single thing to you. Why would you think so poorly of his intentions? she asked, making me feel like she was a mother scolding her stubborn child. I guess in a way, she was.

"Because it doesn't make sense!" I yelled as I moved the laptop and jumped up from the bed, "It makes no sense whatsoever, and you know it! This sounds like a fucking One Direction fan fiction, and there's no way I'm going to fall for that shit!" I said harshly, feeling tears pricking at my eyes. I just felt so angry. Angry at Niall, angry at myself... just angry about the whole mess. Mostly, I was angry at myself for wanting this to be real. Jetta looked taken aback from my outburst, but then her face softened once she saw the tears spilling from my eyes.

"Channing, listen to me. You gave him your letters, right? Well.. what did you write in them?" she asked curiously, as I'd never let her see them.

"To tell you the truth, I hardly remember, I never read over them again after they were written," I said squeezing my eyes shut, trying to get a grip on my emotions. Although I liked to pretend I couldn't remember what I wrote about, the truth is... I couldn't forget even if I tried. I may not remember every detail, but I do remember that I wrote about some really personal and intimate things. Oh God, why did I ever give him those letters?

As I began getting lost in my thoughts, Jetta's voice pulled me back to the present, "Chan, there's something else I want you to watch. It's a video," she said hesitantly, her eyes scrutinized my face, trying to gauge my reaction. My eyes popped open and focused on her nervous face.

"No... no, no, no...." I kept repeating as I covered my face with my hands, "Please don't tell me it's a video from the signing yesterday," I begged her as she took my hand and tugged me back towards the bed. Jetta never answered my question, so I felt my stomach drop, and full blown pterodactyls flying around in my stomach.

Jetta sat me down and gave me a serious look, "Channing, just stop. Stop trying to rebuild your walls! You've already let him in! If you didn't want him involved you should have never let yesterday happen; honestly though, I'm glad you did. You need this. You need him. I want you to watch this video, and I want you to tell me that the way that boy looks at you is with ANYTHING other than love and concern. Just look at him Chan, he has no hidden motive. It is possible for some superstar to care about you Channing, you're not beneath him... don't sell yourself short... He is a normal person, just like you..." she trailed off as she gave me a pleading look.

I rubbed my hands across my face again, trying to prepare myself for what I was about to watch... it was mortifying. After I settled down and Jetta pushed the play button, I looked on in embarrassment and uncertainty, completely unprepared for what I saw. Although the video was still extremely embarrassing, as I watched my interaction with Niall, I felt my heart clench. It was through a grainy cell phone recording... but I could clearly see a spark in his eyes. Was that spark for me? Why? I felt a stupid grin wriggle onto my lips, and I tried to hide it from Jetta, but she of course saw it.

"Chan! You're blushing! Oh my God. You've got to contact him. Just look at how he's looking at you," she said softly as she watched the video in awe. It was now to the point when he noticed the cuts on my wrist, and he leaned down to kiss them. I felt tears teetering at the brink, trying desperately to escape my bottom lid, but I blinked repeatedly, trying to force them back.

After the video ended I just sat there staring at the screen, which was asking if I wanted to replay the video.

I cleared my throat, still trying to keep myself together, "Jetta... what do I do?" I asked her as I met her eyes.

She looked thoughtful for a minute, "Well, you could tweet him... but what's the likelihood he'd even notice your tweet amongst the thousands that he gets everyday?" she seemed to be asking this question to herself.

I merely shrugged my shoulders as I lay back down on the bed; I took my pointer finger and began tracing the ugly, marred flesh of my wrists. They were nowhere as scarred as my thighs... but they still weren't the prettiest sight, and again, I couldn't help thinking... who would want this? Who could learn to love something so ugly? How could Niall want this... want me?

I felt Jetta pack my back gently and whisper,"Just go back to sleep, doll... we'll figure something out later."

I shook my head to clear my thoughts, and my eyelids began feeling heavy once more, so I welcomed the blackness that invaded my mind and body as I drifted away.

**Niall's P.O.V**

I woke to the pleasant feeling of warm sun rays dancing across skin. As I opened one eye and fished my phone out from under my pillow, I saw the time was 11:11am. Hmm... what to wish for, I wondered out loud. I laughed at my self for believing in such a juvenile superstition, but made a wish nonetheless... you know... just in case. I glanced at my nightstand and gazed at the two open letters that were sitting there, since I'd read them last night before falling asleep. They were both, thankfully rather tame and uneventful. Mostly just explaining what was going on in her life, and I was so relieved and happy that at least some of the letters she had given me were light hearted and pleasant. It was nice to know that every single day of her life was not full of misery and suffering. She explained how she had entered a contest to win tickets to one of our concerts that was in New York. She was really excited about it, and I felt a little bummed for her that she obviously didn't win... but I wasn't going to dwell on that now.

She was always so kind in her letters to me... sometimes she'd mention the other boys, but it seemed like to her, I was all that she could see. Everything she said made me actually feel good about myself, but then I'd come crashing down from my high because she'd always subtly hint that she would never be good enough for me... always saying that I was too perfect and too special, which in my opinion was complete bullshit. That girl was beautiful, of course physically, and now that I'd gotten to know a lot about her through these letters, I knew she had a beautiful soul as well. I'd now read five letters, so there were seven or so left. I split the letters into two piles; the ones I'd read I paced in my nightstand drawer, while the unread ones stayed in the envelope.

I was of course feeling hungry, but held off when something on the next letter caught my eye. As I began reading, I completely forgot about my growling stomach and read the letter all the way through;

_February 14th, 2013_

_Dear Niall,_

_Happy Valentine's Day, Nialler! I hope you don't mind... but I've decided you're my valentine... and if you don't like that... well... TOUGH. I'd like to start off by saying that you talked to me last night... we freaking interacted and YOU WILL NEVER KNOW, but that doesn't bother me right now; although you still don't know who I am, you acknowledged my existence and I'm still so excited about it. It's so weird, it's like you're trying to save me without even realizing it, because this couldn't have come at a better time. Let me just start from the beginning;_

_I came home from school to find my worthless stepfather sprawled out on the couch, drunk out of his mind. He also had two white lines lying on the glass coffee table in front of him... and yeah, they weren't sugar. I was pretty shocked when I saw it... I'd always known he was an alcoholic... but I really didn't realize he was into hard drugs as well. As soon as he saw me standing there staring at him, his glazed eyes focused intently on me and he actually smiled. The words that fell out of his disgusting mouth made me want to throw up, "Heyyy Channy!" he slurred. I took a step back when I saw him roll off the couch and scramble to his feet. He then swiftly approached me and trapped me against the wall by the staircase, "Channing, I have some clients coming over tomorrow... I'd like you to meet them, they're really nice people," he said with a harsh smile and twinkle in his eyes._

_I gulped but felt my mouth go completely dry, so the action just further irritated my parched throat. I stuttered when I asked him what he was talking about, which made him give a condescending laugh._

_"Let's... call them business partners... who request your services," he said looking me in the eye, daring me to object. I knew I should have kept quiet since he was deliberately trying to provoke me, but my disobedient mouth fired off anyway," Are you fucking crazy?" I asked him with wide eyes._

_His eyes turned to angry slits and drilled into mine for a few seconds before he smacked me in the face and told me to stop being disrespectful. And that I better have my slutty ass home tomorrow night or I wouldn't like what he would do to me. I pushed away from him and hurried to my room, trying to get away from him and the filthy warnings he put into my brain. Niall, he's trying to fucking SELL ME. ME, MY BODY, MY INNOCENCE. I darted into my room, and jammed my desk chair firmly under the doorknob so that he wouldn't be able to get inside... I've actually started doing this every night. Last week he actually crept into my room while I was sleeping and tried to start touching me while I slept. I woke up to him laying beside me with his hand on the waist band of my pyjama shorts and his other hand under my shirt, just beneath my breasts. I've never been so freaked out or scared in my life. Just imagine it... waking up to a smelly old man who is supposed to be like a father figure with his hands inappropriately touching your body... my skin still crawls when I think about that night. He had actually pinned me down and straddled me while he whispered, "Too bad your mother works so fucking much, otherwise I could do this to her instead of you," and then he let out a low cackle before adding, "No, I'd still want THIS even if she were lying in my bed next to me," when he said 'THIS' he had rubbed his hands over my chest and down to the waistband of my shorts.That's when I started panicking and bucking my hips to get him off. I actually was able to get him to loosen his hold on my arms, and that split second was all I needed, because then I pulled my arm back as far as possible and punched him with all my strength right in the balls. It worked instantly, he rolled off of me and crumbled to the floor._

_He gave me the dirtiest look imaginable and actually punched me in the cheek and kneed me in the ribs, but he did leave my room, so I was happy._

_That night was pretty bad, but after what he told me tonight, I am so fucking scared right now. I wish I had someone to talk to... or somewhere to stay. I can't tell Jetta any of this. I won't get her involved! Oh Niall, why can't you be real? Don't get me wrong, I know you're real... I mean I did just spend an hour of my time last night watching you do a twit cam :D... but why can't you... know who I am? Why can't I find a real person to confide in? Instead of this stupid piece of notebook paper that never responds. Sometimes I forget that I DON'T know you, and we're not really friends... is that strange? Like if something funny happens to me.. or anything for that matter I always think, 'Oh, I need to tell Niall about this!' Oh my God, I'm so pathetic._

_Anyway, tonight... you saved me again from abusing myself. After my step dad said that to me, I was so ready to just lock myself away and cut new patterns into my skin; but then for some reason, I had this nagging feeling in my gut. I wasn't sure what it was, but I postponed my trip to the bathroom and checked my twitter. When I looked at it, I about died. YOU ANSWERED ONE OF MY TWEETS! Earlier that morning, you had tweeted about how much you love New York, and before I left for school I replied to your tweet. I said, "Ur so lucky the risks you took have given you so many opportunities. I''ll probably NEVER get to go to NYC... you deserve this, so enjoy it :D' and this was your response, "Hey! NEVER say NEVER! I'll fly u out here sometime and we can hang out!!! x"_

_Of course I knew you were joking, but that didn't matter. You saw my little insignificant tweet and responded. You made my night... my week... my year. Sorry, I sound a little dramatic, don't I? Ugh, why do you do this to me? Well, you saved me because I was just too happy to cut myself, even though I was still anxious and distraught over what Jeff said to me, all I could think about was the fact that you responded to me. (And promised to take me to New York...) just kidding, I won't hold you to it! I swear, you are my guardian angel... you just don't know it... yet._

_Just remember Niall, everything you do has an impact! The simplest things could have the biggest effects on your fans, so please, just think of us when you're bored. I know it's a lot to ask for, and i don't mean follow everyone that asks... just respond to us. We love you so much for it. I'm not excited that you answered my tweet because I want followers or to be retweeted... I'm just excited... because for that brief period of time, you were thinking of me... and it felt like you were my friend._

_I love you, Niall._

_Love, Channing xox_

As soon as I finished Channing's letter I felt a full blown smile on my face... I'd spoken to her before! Why did this make me feel so excited? I guess it lessened the tremendous amount of guilt that enveloped my heart... but something about this letter was just nagging in the back of my mind. I sat there for a few minutes trying to figure out what this letter meant to me; after a few minutes I decided to get some food in me, to help my thinking process. I strode into the kitchen and saw Zayn sprawled out on the couch, he wasn't awake yet. I popped some toast into the toaster and leaned on the counter trying to think. Liam startled me when he siddently showed up behind me, and he chuckled when he saw me jump.

"Sorry mate... didn't mean to give you a start, you alright?" he asked with concern. I thought about it for a second and decided to confide in Liam about the newest letter. It didn't take him long to piece it together, because immediately after I mentioned that part where she said I'd replied to her tweet, he turned to me and gave me an excited look.

"Niall, you've replied to her before, you know her twitter! Go look through your tweets!" he said as he grabbed his phone out of his pocket and began scrolling through my tweets.

My heart was beating rapidly, "Yer a genius!" 'Twas back in February!" I yelled to him as I sprinted toward my room to retrieve my phone. I frantically began scrolling through all of my old tweets. Jesus Christ, I tweeted a lot. It seriously took me about fifteen minutes and I still was only back in April; annoyance was building steadily on my shoulders. As soon as I made my way to March, the back light of my phone dimmed and it chimed, saying it was only at 5% battery life.

"Fuck!" I yelled a little too loudly.

Liam came rushing into my room, "What's wrong, Niall?" he asked, barely sparing me a glance as he continued scrolling through his phone.

"Nuttin, just me phone's bout tah die," I said in an aggravated tone.

"It's alright mate, I've almost got it!" he said enthusiastically as he sat down on the bed. I quickly went and plugged my phone in so it could recharge and then went to hover over Liam's shoulder as he flew through my tweets. Finally he slid past one where I mentioned New York and I suddenely grabbed at his phone, swiping my finger quickly to get back to the tweet I had spotted.

"Dhat's it!" I hollered excitedly! Liam clicked on the tweet and we combed through the comments looking for what Channing had written in her letter. I smiled when I spotted her tweet, it was the fourth reply. I honestly can't say that I remember replying to her tweet... it was so long ago, but as I sat there and stared at her tiny little twitter pic, I felt a rush of excitement flood through me. Liam clicked on her picture and I stared in awe, the pic was of her and I'm assuming her friend Jetta, sitting on their skateboards. They were holding hands and were turned away from the camera, it was actually a really beautiful picture. Channing's hair looked considerably shorter than it was at the signing, so it must have been an older photo. Liam and I took a few minutes, browsing over her tweets. Surprisingly a lot of them were sent to me, they were usually encouraging, or sympathetic, or sweet. Never once did she ask me to 'follow her' and for that I was relieved, because I really can't stand it. I smiled when I also saw plenty of encouraging tweets to the other boys, but it was her most recent tweets that caught my eye:

**@DarlyChan @NiallOfficial thank you for being so kind. you've helped me more than you'll ever know.**

**@DarlyChan @NiallOfficial even though I may never meet you... the fact that you even exist just makes me really happy. ily**

**@DarlyChan @NiallOfficial i'm sorry i didn't get tickets for your show :c I prob will nevr get to go, but that's ok because I'll always support you <3**

Liam looked up at me and waited patiently for me to meet his gaze, "So what do you plan on doing now, mate?" he asked curiously.

I thought about my answer for a moment before responding,"Aye... do yah think it'd be odd if I... yeh know, tried tah suhprise 'er?" I asked, feeling slightly embarrassed for some reason. I don't know why, but that tweet she had up about never being able to get concert tickets just really made me want to do something that would make her smile.

"No, I'm sure she'd enjoy that," he said while a tapped his finger to his chin as he thought, "Would you just give them to her directly... or?" he inquired.

Again, I stayed silent as I thought over my options, and then I had an idea. I quickly grabbed Liam's phone, he gave me a surprised look, but gave me the phone nonetheless. Once I had the phone I logged out of his twitter and logged into my own. After searching for Channing's twitter, I decided not to follow her right away, instead I clicked on her followers. Thankfully she didn't have hardly any... only 33 to weed through. I swiped my finger down the screen as I searched for the person I was looking for. After a few seconds I made Liam jump when I accidentally yelled out, "Bingo!" a little too loudly.

"What on earth are you doing, Niall?" he asked as he tried to crawl behind me so he could see what I was doing on his phone.

"Oi, gimme a sec," I mumbled as I clicked on the username I wanted and opened up a direct message. Before I typed anything I glanced at Liam, "Do yeh reckon I shud try an' contact tha friend a hers...? Jetta?" he gave me a confused look, but I continued on, "Yeh know... so that I can try an' give her tha tickets to tha concert tomorrow night" I asked excitedly.

Liam still gave me a very stoic expression, so I rolled my eyes and explained further, "I figure I culd try tah talk tah Jetta and maybe seh she won tha tickets in a contest... yeh know. Then once there, I can meet her 'gain and suhprise 'er!" I said enthusiastically.

Liam smiled widely after that, "Ah, well that makes more sense. I think that'd work out very well. Channing seems like she could use a happy surprise in her life," he said kindly as he cupped my shoulder in a friendly gesture.

I quickly got to work and sent her my DM;

**@NoJettaProtested hi, this is Niall Horan of One Direction. I met your friend, Channing the other day at a signing and I'd like to see her again... could you please do me a favor? I'd like to offer you two tickets to our concert tomorrow night, but DON'T tell her! I'd like to surprise her. You could maybe say you won them in a contest or something..? Please feel free to message me on here. Or even text or call me. Thanks so much for your help... your friend is special. I'd just like to show her that.**

I typed in my number at the very bottom, I was always nervous about giving people my number... you never knew who you could trust. But I figured, if she was some crazy fan who gave the number to others, then I guess I'd just get a new one. I debated about sending it for another second, but then built up my courage and tapped the send button before I could chicken out.

Now I just had to sit back and wait; hopefully with the help of her friend... I could convince Channing that she's important. A twinge of uneasiness radiated in my belly... it was a mixture of nerves, excitement, and anxiety. I just hoped that I was doing the right thing. Honestly I just wanted to be as good of a person as Channing thought me to be; because in all honesty, she's a better person then I'll ever be, and I think it's up to me to show her that.


	7. Serious As A Heart Attach... Oww!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jetta responds to Niall and they plan to surprise Channing by getting her to a concert...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IDK... I feel like some parts of this chapter are like 100% carrot :) but please enjoy anyway!

**Jetta's P.O.V**

It was nearly noon and Channing's lazy ass was still crashed upstairs in my bed. I was currently parked on the couch in front of the TV, stuffing my face with Cheetos and Dr. Pepper. I was absentmindedly channel surfing, and after flipping through a billion channels, I finally settled on good ol' Jerry Springer. Honestly, how can you not love this show? It always makes me feel better about my life. I sat there, totally captivated by the guests; they were sisters, both pregnant, and both by the same man. Ew... that's so disgusting.

As my mind got shivers because of how disturbing most of the guests on this show were, I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I was expecting it to be a text from my boyfriend, but as I glanced down at my phone I noticed it was a Twitter notification; I was just expecting a new follower of something, however, I was quite surprised to see a direct message. A direct message from none other than Niall Mathafukin Horan. I seriously was bouncing around the living room, allowing myself to have a few moments to fangirl. Channing may have had too much pride to let herself fangirl.. but I had no pride whatsoever.

My eyes traveled the little screen, and as I read what he wrote, I about had another fangirling fit. Ohmygod. This cannot be real. Now I know what Channing's going on about... how could he go through all this trouble to find her? What the hell did she put in those letters? That she had a golden vagina? I mean, honestly... I understand wanting to help people... but, for the most part, people just tend to look the other away from those that are in need. I know Niall is a sweetheart, but... I don't know, maybe I'm just not giving him enough credit. Before replying, I carefully considered what I was going to say... I of course wanted to accept the tickets... Channing would probably die right on the spot; but I also wanted to make sure his intentions were honest and true;

**@NiallOfficial Holy shit. I honestly just sat here staring at my phone for the last ten minutes trying to convince myself that you were some kind of fake account. You are Niall Horan. I'm sorry... give me a moment to collect myself *brb fangirling* OK... I think I'm better now, sorry about that. Of course I will help you... but can I ask you something? Why? Why are you doing this for Channing? She's been through a lot, you know.**

Sometimes I had a problem with writing too much so I just tried to keep it short and simple, and added my number to the bottom. I was not about to text him first. I tapped the send button and then immediately felt my shoulders relax.

I sat there twiddling my thumbs staring at the clock on the wall, I was still having trouble with the fact that Niall Horan just sent me a direct message. For the past year, both Channing and I have tweeted them all constantly, and we were only noticed once. Ok, I guess I can't say "we" were noticed, but she was! God, she was so happy that day. I decided to shut my eyes for a moment as I rolled over on the couch and curled up under the blanket. I'm not sure how much time actually passed, but I was woken by my phone blasting my text message tone. At first my foggy brain didn't register what that could mean so I just rolled over again and shoved my head under the pillow. However, a few minutes later when my text message tone went off once more, my eyes popped open and I hastily searched for my phone that had slipped into the couch in between the cushions.

I did a fist pump in victory as I pulled the phone free and immediately looked at the screen. I had two new text messages from an unknown number, and I had a sneaking suspicion of who that could be. This crap was just getting weirder and weirder. I opened the texts and read them in order of when they arrived:

_Niall: Hi.. Jetta? This is Niall... is it easier for us to talk this way? x_

A few minutes later he'd sent the second one,

_Niall: I hope you believe me when I say that I'm trying to find Channing... because I truly felt a connection to her. That first day I met her, I felt a strange need to protect her. I know it seems weird, hell, I feel like a creep... but it's something I have to do. x_

I smiled at his text and decided to start replying.

_Jetta: Sorry... I fell asleep on the couch, since Channing is kinda hogging my bed._

_Niall: Oh so she's a bed hog? Good to know... x_

_Jetta: Yeah, I think it's really sweet what you're trying to do, Niall. She's had so many shitty hands dealt to her... it's about time she was actually given a good hand._

_Niall: You seem really awesome, chan spoke of you a lot in her letters x_

_Jetta: Did she? Well, I love her to death. We keep each other grounded. She's more like a sister._

_Niall: I think I know the feeling you're talking about... you do know my band mates, right? Haven't you heard about all our bromances? ;) Yeah I don't know about all that... but they are definitely more like brothers than friends. x_

_Jetta: Hah! Do I know about the bromances? I'm going to tell you a secret, I am the biggest Zouis shipper! And Channing is a huuuuge believer in Narry :)_

_Niall: So she ships me with one of my best mates? I don't know if I should feel creeped out by that.... what no Larry? I can't argue with Zouis... that's completely real! x_

_Jetta: Hah! I knew it!! Oh you just made my Zouis feels explode... & NO, I DO NOT SHIP LARRY. Never have, never will. I hate all the hype around it... it's so sad :(_

_Niall: I'm sorry, but I don't understand what "feels" means. I don't really understand anything in that second sentence. x_

_Jetta: Eh, don't worry about it... it's just fangirl speak for "I'm getting emotional over Zouis because it's so precious and adorable"... we have our own language don't you know?_

_Niall: Yeah, I've snooped around on Tumblr enough to figure that out... but it doesn't mean I understand it! x_

It was then that I heard Channing stumble into the room, after shooting me a tired smile she headed straight for the kitchen.

_Jetta: Oh, hey Channing just came in the room. What should I do?_

_Niall: Don't tell her you're texting me... I'd really like it to be a surprise. I'm going to have two tickets waiting for you up at Guest Services at the arena. Just tell them you are expecting two tickets under the name of Niall Horan. x_

_Jetta: Ok, what time's the concert? By the way Niall, Chan looks so pretty this morning. She's got adorable bedhead and a puffy, sleepy face. I swear, she's the only person I know who can look flawless without trying. That bitch._

_Niall: Show starts at 8pm... so just get there before then! and... could you snap me a picture?_

_Niall: Sorry... that was creepy, you don't have to. x_

I smiled down at the latest text from Niall, he was adorable when he was embarrassed... even through a text message. I could even imagine his "Irish cheeks" growing red. I actually didn't find it creepy... I found it endearing. Channing was in the kitchen and I was too lazy to get up and follow her so I called her over to the couch. She groaned loudly but complied; I was still lying down so when she got to the couch she looked over the edge, and glanced down at me. She saw me holding my phone and gave me a kissy face right as I snapped the photo. She then rolled her eyes and walked back to the kitchen.

"Why the hell are you taking my picture?" she asked as she walked away.

"You just look real cute... maybe I'll upload this to twitter...." I teased her as I looked into the kitchen, throwing her a wink.

"You better delete that," she said as she dug around in the fridge, completely unaffected by my taunting.

"Of course I will," I said mockingly.

I studied the picture for a moment before attaching it to a text message and sending it to Niall.

As the caption I put "Awee morning sugars for Jetta (not Niall :p)"

It was strange... how easy to was to talk to Niall... almost like he was a normal person or something. HAH! Normal my ass. This was Niall freakin Horan. I bit my lip in an attempt to tame the fangirl freak out that was threatening to escape.

_Niall: morning? It's 1:30pm. x_

_Jetta: Well, trust me, for Chan this is morning. She's a night owl._

_Niall: OK... how can i say this without sounding cheesy... how in the bloody hell can she see herself as anything other than perfect? thanks for the pic. i love it. x_

I smiled at my phone after reading his text when Channing walked in and plopped down on the couch next to me with a bowl of fruity pebbles.

"Watcha doing?" she asked with a mouth full of the colorful cereal.

I quickly sent Niall one last text before telling him I had to go;

_Jetta: That's really sweet Niall... & I don't know, but I guess it's up to you to make her see the truth <3 g2g="">_

I slipped my phone into my pocket as I watched my best friend start laughing at the television, I checked the screen to see it was none other than Spongebob Squarepants. I rolled my eyes and hopped up from the couch, "Hey nukka, I'm gonna shower and so are you... then we're going shopping!" I exclaimed excitedly, much like the dudes did at the end of White Chicks.

"Why?" she simply retorted, shoveling more cereal into her mouth, spilling some on her top. That's real attractive Channing... we can't have you looking a mess when you meet Mr. Horan.

"Becauseeee... tomorrow night we are going to be doing something very fun... but it's a surprise!" I said cryptically as I wandered off toward the hallway, smiling to myself over how happy this was going to make her. Just one more step on the road to recovery.

**Niall's P.O.V**

A triumphant smile spread across my face as I read Jetta's final text... it was nice to have her approval, although I didn't want to get ahead of myself. Channing has been through some traumatic shit in her life, so my main goal is to be a friend to her first... I didn't want to scare her off. I was sitting on the recliner, completely ignoring everyone else in the room. All of the boys had met in my hotel room and they were watching a movie.

"What has you lookin' so smiley, Nialler?" Louis' high pitched voice chirped from across the room. I shrugged my shoulders and after putting my phone away, I looked up and smiled at everyone, "Jetta's in! She said she'd bring her to the concert," I said nonchalantly, trying to suppress my excitement... I didn't want to seem too eager.

"That's great!" Harry was the first to answer, as the rest of the boys smiled and nodded their heads. I stretched my arms out wide as I rose to my feet and made a pretty obnoxious groaning sound, I was met with a pillow to the face.

"Shut it, mate!" Zayn hollered, apparently her was really into the movie.

I wandered away from them and decided to mess around on Twitter for a bit; deciding to do as Channing asked. After about an hour of answering tons of fan questions, I threw my phone across the room and picked up the remaining stack of Chan's unread letters.

"March 17th, 2013

_Dear Niall,_

_I haven't written to you in a while... and since today is Saint Patrick's day... I couldn't help but think of you :D I hope you are having a lovely holiday, isn't it celebrated among your people, my little leprechaun? I'm only teasing! So... I just wanted to let you know... just because I don't write to you everyday, doesn't mean I don't think of you. It's actually pretty pathetic... the amount of time I daydream about meeting you. Only in my dreams, right? Oh well... I suppose that's better than nothing, so I guess I'll meet you there again tonight :)_

_Niall, some bad things have happened to me recently... please forgive me though, because I don't want to go into detail. It's not that I don't trust you... but I just don't trust myself. If I start thinking about it, I'll be locked in my bathroom again watching the clear shower water turn red. I was afraid to write to you for a while to be honest, mostly because I felt ashamed. I always have known that I'd never be good enough for you... but now I just feel dirty and disgusting. I'm used. I'm trash... and it's all HIS fault. I'll never be good enough for anyone now. I don't know how to get past this... I wish I had you. If I had you to take me away, this would have never happened. All I know is things will never be the same... he's taken something away from me that I will never be able to get back."_

As soon as I finished reading that paragraph, I about threw it in the drawer, never wanting to see it again. I was AFRAID of things getting to this point for her... since that first letter I had a sneaking suspicion it was leading that way. I actually felt the the sting of tears in my eyes. SHE SHOULD NOT HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT. I also realized that I was getting mad at MYSELF, and I was mad at myself because I found myself getting mad at her. Why didn't she go to the police? Why didn't she leave? These were the questions swirling around in my mind; followed by the worst question that just kept ramming repeatedly against my brain... did it happen more than once? God just stop! Don't blame the victim, that's what they always say right? Ugh, why is that the first thing a person seems to do? I already felt like shit as soon as my mind tried to point the blame at her. I stood up and started pacing the room.

After a few minutes I saw Louis peek his head in my door, "Hey, mate... we're gonna head to the pub for a pint? You want to come out with--"

Once he noticed my frantic pacing he stopped mid sentence and quickly approached me, his face full of concern, "Niall, what's the matter?" he asked as he grabbed my shoulders, making me come to a halt. I knew he was looking at me but I couldn't meet his eyes. I merely motioned toward the letter that was lying on my unmade bed. Hesitantly, he picked up the crumbled piece of paper and began reading it. After a few seconds he looked up at me, his expression was sympathetic.

"Did you finish reading it?" he asked softly as I took a seat on the edge of the bed and he sat next to me.

"No." I replied shortly.

At that moment, Zayn decided to crash the party as well, once he saw my broken expression he hurried over and sat on the other side of me, "What is it?" he asked solemnly. I saw that he noticed the note in Lou's hand... so he probably assumed it had to do with Channing.

"Do you want me to read it, Niall? You may as well finish it. She kept it tame, and she needs you to listen to her," he said encouragingly.

I was getting tired of everyone saying that to me, did they honestly think that just because I was upset that I would just throw these letters into the fire and forget about her? I pushed my aggravated thoughts away, I didn't want to take my frustrations out on my mates. I nodded my head and lay back on my bed, I put my hands behind my head and stared up toward the ceiling. I sort of tuned out the beginning, and started paying attention when Lou got to the next paragraph;

_"My cutting has gotten really bad recently... I've been trying to steer clear of my wrists... but my ankles and thighs aren't so lucky. Oh my God what have I done? Why have I done these things to myself? As I sit here and trace the angry patterns in my thighs... I just can't help but cry. I regret my decisions and actions. Honestly, SO WHAT if I've been emotionally scarred? So what if I've been abused? I have been scarred in many ways by other people, but at least all those scars were invisible to the naked eye. Not what I've done though... no. The scars I've inflicted on myself will never leave. I'll always be reminded of just how weak I was during the lowest points in my life. I'll always be judged. I'll always be pitied. I'll always be labeled. I'll never be loved. People will see them and either be scared of me, or assume that I do it to seek attention. I'll never be able to wear a bikini... If I ever have children, they'll ask me about them as well. Oh my God... what have I done?_

_Niall, I'm sorry I keep breaking my promises. I keep saying that I'm going to stop... but I can't and I don't know why. Maybe I just don't have a strong enough influence in my life to help me stop. Don't get me wrong, writing to you is so therapeutic... and if it weren't for you, maybe I would have dragged that blade a little too deeply by now._

_I've started writing a song for you. It's not finished yet... but I'm sure I have plenty of time to finish right? You're in no hurry to hear it. You never will be. I'm sorry this letter is so depressing, but sometimes smiling through the pain just becomes too much to bear. I love you Niall. Do you think it's possible to love someone you've never met? I don't know. I'm probably crazy for thinking I love you. Millions of girls "claim" they love you everyday... I'm sure you aren't even phased by those three little words anymore. Well, it doesn't matter if you believe me or not... I do love you. I just wish you loved me too."_

_Love, Channing xox"_

As Louis finished reading the letter, her words stuck in my mind, 'I just wish you loved me too'. I let those words tumble around in my brain, until an automatic thought surfaced... and it scared me. She said she wished I loved her too...and that's when I had a realization; I think I actually did.

**Channing's P.O.V**

I was sitting in one of the chairs they have set up outside of the dressing rooms waiting for Jetta to hurry up and make a decision, she'd been acting so strange about these mysterious plans we had set up for tomorrow night. She tried desperately to get me to wear something cute and revealing, she insisted that I had to look "amazayn", and then when I would ask her what the hell that meant she'd just burst out in hysterical laughter. I swear, she's a total nut job.

Of course, I refused and just decided I'm going to wear black skinny jeans and a band tee featuring All Time Low... since she wasn't telling me where we were going, I was refusing to dress up. I readjusted myself in the uncomfortable leather chair, playing around on Jetta's phone. I was actually snooping around on Twitter, seeing if anyone was still going on about Niall and I. Of course they were. I was like this big secret... and I'm sure that's all I would ever be. As I made my nosy ass over to Niall's page, I noticed his most recent tweet, which was sent around noon today;

**@NiallOfficial can't wait to see u again 2morro!!! :) x**

That's weird. An uneasy feeling grew in the pit of my stomach... who could he be talking about? Why should I care? It's not like he's mine or anything... he can see whoever he wants. I mean... he obviously is over trying to find me. I guess I'm kind of stupid for thinking he was serious. I took a second to read through some of the replies;

**@giveme_payne @NiallOfficial** now who are we talking about here? Hmmm... does the name begin with Chan and end with Ning??? I ship Chialler  <3

**@nialls_fave_mofo @NiallOfficial** who the hell is this girl. like seriously, Niall is MINE.

**@1ds_5bigthings @NiallOfficial** I know, I can't wait to see you tomorrow either! hehe ;) see u at the concert :D follow me?

As soon as I read the last tweet I felt a pang of jealousy course through me. They were going to be having a concert barely 45 minutes away from my home... and there was no way I'd be able to go. It's like seriously, I don't know how girls get such close seats. The one time I even considered buying a ticket, the seats were miles away and the price was over $200. Oh well, I'm not about to dwell on it. I just need to move on. As I skimmed through more replied to Niall's tweet, I noticed a lot of people kept mentioning me, and I started chuckling to myself like an idiot. These girls were sadly mistaken... well actually I guess they were just mistaken and I was the sad one. I decided to post a tweet of my own;

**@DarlyChan** i hope i'm not a causality, i hope you won't get up and leave... might not mean that much to u... but to me it's everything. EVERYTHING. #trulymadlydeeply

I'm not really sure why I sent that tweet out... I felt like I was begging him not to give up on me. Which was pointless since he doens't even know my twitter. I shook my head, clearing my thoughts as Jetta finally came out of the fitting room with a big smile on her face, "You are just going to DIE tomorrow night. I'm serious DIE," she winked as she walked away toward the cash register.

I hopped off the chair and grabbed her elbow, turning her to face me,"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked suspiciously.

She took her pointer finger and thumb and swiped them across her lips like it was a zipper. Ugh, sometimes she could be such a little bitch.

After we got back to her house that night, all we did was sit around and paint each other's nails while watching movies. I felt like she was still hiding something from me, and I felt irritation building on my shoulders because of that. I even caught her talking on the phone in the kitchen, trying to be quiet and not draw my attention. I don't know what's going on, but she's really terrible at subtly. As I lay in bed that night, for some reason I started feeling shivers because my mind wandered to my stepfather, without my permission I might add. Anytime I thought of the man I got this insane need to cut. It was horrible. I hadn't been home in the past two days... who knows what state my room is in. I shuddered at the thought of him destroying my things, but honestly I just couldn't go back there. Especially if he thinks he's going to sell me to his new clients. I squeezed my eyes shut and scratched at my wrists, trying to forget the past.

Jetta was laying next to me, but I could tell she wasn't asleep because she kept fidgeting. I decided I needed a distraction before I wound up doing something stupid.

"Hey Jet?" I asked softly, as I turned over to face her back.

She slowly rolled over and facing me,"Everything OK Channy?" she question with a concerned look.

"Yeah I was actually gonna ask you the same question... you seem antsy. Have you been having insomnia again?" I pried.

Jetta is a full blown insomniac. She actually takes medication for it, and most of the time she's able to keep it under control; however, lately I'd noticed the circles under her eyes and was afraid she hasn't been sleeping much.

She gave me a sheepish smile, "A little... it's no biggie though," she answered simply, trying to brush away my concern.

I smiled sadly at my best friend, she did look so tired. I just honestly do not understand that disease. If your body is so tired, why wont your mind let you sleep? God, I would hate that so much.

Then I got an idea, when I was younger and couldn't sleep, my mother would always sing the same lullaby to me and I loved it, "Hey, J... roll over. I'm just going to try something so don't fight it," she rolled her eyes and turned over obediently.

I rubbed my fingertips on her back, over her T-shirt as I began singing softly, just like my my mother used to do for me;

_"Next time you're found, with your chin on the ground_ _There's a lot to be learned, so look around_  
 _Just what makes that little old ant_ _Think he'll move that rubber tree plant_ _Anyone knows ant, can't_ _Move a rubber tree plant_  
 _But he's got high hopes, he's got high hopes_ _Hes got high apple pie, in the sky hopes_  
 _So any time your gettin low_ _Stead of lettin go_ _Just remember that ant_ _Oops there goes another rubber tree plant_  
 _When troubles call, and your backs to the wall_ _There a lot to be learned, that wall could fall_  
 _So any time your gettin low_ _Stead of lettin go_ _Just remember that ant..._ _Oops there goes another rubber tree..._ _Oops there goes another rubber tree..._ _Oops there goes another rubber tree plant."_

The last line I sing so softly that it turned into a whisper, and I was met with the pleasant sound of Jetta's rhythmic breathing, showing that she'd actually fallen asleep. I was happy that I could help her, even if it was only a little bit. Jet has helped me get through so many things... I honestly owe her so much. I drifted into the black abyss, listening to the gentle snores of my best friend and the soothing hum of her ceiling fan.

***

The next morning I woke up to hushed whispering coming from Jetta's bathroom. As I pulled myself to a sitting position and rubbed the sleep from my eyes, I noticed that the bathroom door was cracked slightly open. Hmm... To eavesdrop or not to eavesdrop... That is the question. I decided that it probably wasn't a big deal if I heard who she was talking to, so I clambered out of the blankets and sneakily approached the bathroom.

"Yeah, we'll probably get there around 7:00 or 7:30," Jetta said into her phone, "I don't want to get there too early. Who knows if anyone will recognize her, you know with that video circulating..."she trailed off softly.

There was silence, so I suppose she was listening to whomever was speaking on the other end. The voice actually sounded rather loud and deep. Was she talking to a guy? About tonight? Oh for the love of God she better not be setting me up on another blind date!

"OK, so the tickets will be waiting for us, right? And what are we supposed to do afterwards? How will you find us?" She asked even more quietly. I was now leaning against the door trying desperately to hear the conversation, as I tried to listen in to this unknown persons response, I accidentally lost my balance and my weight fell against the door, pushing it open and totally giving away my position.

Jetta spun around and stared at me wide-eyed before forming her eyes into slits and glaring at me, "Well, well. well... Who's trying to be sneaky?" Jetta asked, accusation evident in her voice.

"Uh... Um... I just wanted to use the bathroom!" I yelled, a little too loudly.

Jetta turned away from me and whispered into the phone once more, "Nope, it's fine. She was trying to be sneaky and listen in... But she's honestly a terrible ninja," she laughed. I could hear loud laughter coming from the other end as well... wait, why does that laugh sound so familiar? There was a nagging in my brain, like it was trying to tell me something, but I quickly forgot as Jetta came and stood right in front of me with her arms crossed over her chest.

I narrowed my eyes at her, "You're not setting me up on another blind date, right? I asked snappily.

She suddenly burst out in laughter at my question, while I gave her a weird look," What?" I asked defensively, I was starting to feel self conscious.

While she continued laughing she took my hands and pulled me into a hug, "Oh honey, you are in for the surprise of your life!" she said, bouncing up and down in excitement.

I tried to keep a straight face, but I eventually cracked and started laughing with her, although it still annoyed me that I wasn't sure why we were laughing.

"Geeze! Why are you so giddy? It's like you got us One Direction tickets or something..." I said offhandedly as I turned to leave the bathroom. I noticed she'd tensed up when I made that statement so I turned around to give her a look, however, she quickly changed her demeanor and just shrugged her shoulders.

"Don't even remind me! Ughhh, what I would give to go to their concert tonight," she sighed as she placed her hand over her forehead dramatically and looked off into the distance. I laughed again at her weirdness.

I smiled at her for another second before I felt her words sink in, "Yeah, me too," I replied sadly, as I remembered I would probably never go to one.

I met her eyes and saw what looked like guilt flash across them for a split second. I turned to leave the bathroom, but was stopped when Jetta gently grabbed my shoulder and spun me around, "Channing, I promise you, if it's the last thing we do... we will see those boys live one day. Okay?" she asked with a triumphant smile.

With that being said, she skipped passed me, back into her bedroom and began gathering her clothes for our "plans" tonight. Something in my brain was still nagging me to pry, but I just ignored it and stood in the bathroom staring at my reflection. Although I try not to bash myself, as I stood in front of the mirror, all I could see was a broken girl with knotted curly hair, a pale face, and dead eyes. Not to mention I was a scarred menace. There's no way I'd ever deserve to go to a concert. There's no way I would ever deserve HIM.

**Zayn's P.O.V**

We got to the arena around 4:30 pm so that we could do a sound check and make sure everything was sorted out before the show. The boys and I were quite aware of Niall's anxious behavior, he was REALLY into this girl. I guess some people might think he's being ridiculous since he really only spoke with Channing for about five minutes; but honestly, she doesn't feel like a stranger to him anymore. She really opened up in those letters, and I reckon the intimate details she revealed make him feel a lot closer to her. I don't blame him, hell, even I feel close to her.

Niall had been biting his nails constantly for the past few hours, so when I saw his fingers in his mouth yet again, I swiftly walked to where he was and smacked his hand away, "Niall... calm down. You're not going to wanna strum that guitar that makes all the girls go wild if your nails are all bloody and bitten to the quick," I chided.

"He reluctantly took his fingers from his mouth and began fidgeting with the hem of his shirt instead, "Niall, why are you so nervous?" I asked, as I studied him closely.

"I really don't know, mate. I feel like I might explode. I'm nervous to see her again, sure... but what if I scare her off? What if she thinks I'm weird or stalking her?" he asked as he looked down at his Supras.

"Ni! Just calm down. She came to our signing... she sought you out first. You have nothing to be worried about, honestly," I said as I patted his shoulder in a reassuring gesture. Niall nodded his head once at me and turned to head back to the dressing room. Hopefully he'd use that time to relax. He's strung up so tight, by the time he gets on stage tonight, I fear what could happen.

**Channing's P.O.V**

We were cruising down the highway as I sat with my arms crossed and a pout on my face. It was finally time for my "big surprise" and my bitch of a best friend still wouldn't spill the beans. I honestly don't understand the point of surprises... especially if the person getting the surprise hates them! Just save everyone some grief and get it all out in the open. I don't know why but I've always been that way my entire life... it's like I can't stand NOT KNOWING what could happen. I'm one of those people who won't see a movie unless I know how it's going to end. I mean, I don't really know if there are other people like that out there... who knows, I'm forever alone anyway, so it wouldn't surprise me if I was the only weirdo who hated surprises as well.

I glanced at Jetta from the corner of my eye, she still was wearing a smug little grin. She looked really pretty though, so of course I was jealous. She had on a black mini skirt paired with black ankle boots and a white lacy sleeveless blouse. Her long blond hair was actually scrunched tonight, so it cascaded over her shoulders in tight little squiggles.

I smiled a little at our switched appearances. Normally, I had the curly hair and she was always sporting the pin straight locks; I hardly ever straightened my hair, mostly because I was so ungodly lazy... so of course Jetta was the one to actually straighten my hair tonight. I grabbed a handful of my boring brown hair and examined my split ends for a few minutes. I quickly lost interest though and went back to glaring at Jetta; I knew she could feel me glaring holes into the side of her head.

"You know, Chan... glaring at me is not going to make me tell you where we're going... sorry boo," she said dismissively, tucking some of her hair behind her ear. I stared longingly at her beautifully clear wrists. I was so envious to the fact that she didn't have to wear 50 thousand bracelets to try and hide her weakness. I looked down at my own wrists, I'm not sure why I always compare myself to her... all it does is make me depressed. I played with a few of my bracelets, tugging them up and down my wrists.

I started to feel a little self conscious since I hadn't brought a jacket of anything to hide my arms. What the hell was I thinking? All I had on were my skinny jeans, converse, and short sleeved band tee, featuring The Summer Set. Crap... now I was just going to feel awkward all night.

Jet must have noticed me fidgeting with my jewelry because she called my name, bringing my attention away from the monstrosities that connected my hands to my arms, "Yeah?" I asked, trying to pretend I wasn't upset.

"Chaaaany! Don't give me that look. Please just trust me. You are going to poop your pants when you see where I'm taking you," she said with a big grin. Did I mention that she was the immature one? She always related excitement to "pooping your pants."

I groaned at her signature phrase, "Jetta you're so gross. I swear you are obsessed with poop." I chuckled lightly as I looked out the window of her 1998 Geo Tracker.

"I know," she said simply. Well that's good. At least she's not in denial.

I turned toward her again, deciding that I was going to annoy the shit out of her until she told me where we were going, she hates it when I sing cheesy tunes in the car.

"Driving down the highway, highway 94... Jetta ripped a big one, and blew us out the door! The windows couldn't take it, the engine fell apart... all because of Jetta's SUPERSONIC FART!" I sang the last few words as obnoxiously as I could. Ok, I guess I'm pretty immature a well. So sue me.

She rolled her eyes at me and quickly reached for the radio, "DO NOT EVEN START THAT SHIT... I SWEAR TO GOD CHANNING..." she warned, as she turned the volume up. All she seemed to be able to find at the moment were talk shows, so I took the opportunity to begin a new song.

"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around... 98 bottles of beer on the wall!" I screeched, "98 bottles of beer on the wall, 98 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around... 97 bottles of beer on the wall!" I was trying to keep singing, but was laughing too hard at Jetta's annoyed expression.

I actually managed to continue singing, even when music started playing. She had it blaring to try and drown me out, but I was still able to scream loud enough to where I knew she could hear me. I made it down to 91 bottles of beer on the wall when a familiar strumming came pouring out of the car speakers which made me immediately shut up. I glanced at Jetta and a knowing smile made it's way to both of our faces, as she cranked up the radio even higher.

_"Hey girl, I'm waitin' on ya... I'm waitin' on ya._

_Come on and let me sneak you out..."_

We started singing along full blast to Live While We're Young, and I couldn't help just feeling... happy in that moment. It was times like this that I forgot about the life that was waiting for me, miles in the opposite direction. Right here, right now... I was just with my best friend... and things were ok.

"Shhhhhh!" I said loudly, but I didn't have to, since she knew the drill. No one sings over Niall's parts. They're too few and far inbetween. I felt the goosebumps dance along my skin as his voice vibrated around the car.

_"Yeah we'll be doin' what we do,_

_Just pretendin'_ _that we're cool so tonight.._

_LET'S GO!"_

As soon as the "Crazy, crazy, crazy" part came, we immediately jumped back in. After the song ended, we had to float back down from our high. I noticed Jetta glancing at me while trying to keep her eyes on the road.

"What?" I asked with a laugh.

"You just have a goofy grin on your face. You really love those boys don't you? One Irishy one in particular... " she trailed off in a playful tone.

I gave her a duh look,"Way to state the obvious, Jet... did you by chance also realize that the sky is blue?" I asked her, matching her playful tone.

Her hand snapped out and slapped my arm, "Hey bitch!" I yelled, "That stung..." I whined as I rubbed my arm.

"If only you knew where we were going... you'd be on the ground, kissing my ankle boots," she said, nonchalantly, "Well we're here now, so I guess you better get to kissin 'em!"

I stopped laughing at my lame try at sarcasm and stared at her, just now realizing that we had exited the highway and entered the downtown Saint Louis area. I quickly looked around our dark surroundings, trying to find a clue as to what the hell she was going on about. It only took a few seconds for me to spy the parking lot we were heading to, as well as the million other cars the street was clogged up with. I only really figured out where we were when my eyes found a gigantic billboard that lit up the entire front of the arena, it was flashing a sentence that I knew was going to change my life.

**"One Direction, TONIGHT! 8:00pm!!"**

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I was watching Channing carefully as I tried to weave in and out of the mess of cars. When her entire body suddenly stiffened, that's when I knew she realized where we were. I coudn't hide the massive smile that broke across my face in anticipation of her reaction. I even giggled when I noticed her subtly pinching her arm, as if she were dreaming.

Channing hadn't said a word, but I knew that she was still just trying to process what was going on. I was ushered forward by a parking lot attendant and after following his pointing finger, my car eased into a tight spot, squished in between a beat up Honda Civic and a big ass F150 pick up truck. I laughed again because as I pulled in, Chan had unbuckled herself so that she could turn around in the seat, still staring at the arena, much like a five year old, as if it were going to vanish if she didn't keep her eyes on it. Once I turned the engine off, we sat there in silence for a few minutes as I waited for her to erupt. She slowly turned her head to face me, and I almost started laughing at how slow she was speaking, obviously to keep control of herself, "Jetta. Are. You. Serious?"

"Serious as a heart attack... Oww!" I screamed out the "ow" like Niall does in their song.

Her eyes widened as the biggest smile I have ever seen in my life spread across her face. It was almost frightening, maybe it was a good idea for her to get all of her excitement out in the car. She inhaled a deep breath and was about to scream, but quickly composed herself.

Channing absolutely hated the term "fangirl" and always did everything in her power to not go crazy over the boys. She had built up tremendous self control; so, while I was just as obnoxious as all the other fans, jumping and screaming out about carrots and Harry's nipples while trying to rip off their clothes, Channing was the one standing there, all cool and collected. I loved that about her, actually.

Suddenly, she sprang across the seat, ramming my shoulder into the door as she landed in my lap. I barely had time to yell out in protest before she brought her arms around my neck and hugged me so tightly, I thought I might pop. She did Niall's "signature hug", in fact, she'd always done that, even before we became 1D obsessed.

I thought it was sweet that they seemed to have that trait of burying their face in the other persons neck in common. My only concern was... how are they supposed to hug each other? They obviously aren't both going to be able to bury their faces in each others necks at the same time. Hmm... what a dilemma, I suppose they'll just have to negotiate it out. I was pondering all of this as Channing continued to squeeze the life out of me.

"Oh my God, Jetta! Thank you!" she said excitedly as she finally released me and pulled away, then she gave me a bewildered look, "But how? Oh my God, how did you get tickets?"

I smiled sweetly, letting my rehearsed fib leak from my lips, "I won a radio contest last week!"

I had actually planned to say more, because usually she asks a million questions, but that answer seemed to be good enough for her because she pushed open my drivers side door and stumbled out of the car. Good lord that girl was eager. I actually expected her to be nervous, but she didn't portray any anxiousness at all.

"C'mon, c'mon!" she sang as she grabbed my hand and yanked me out of the car as well, she attempted to drag me across the parking lot but I skidded to a halt, ripping my hand from her grasp.

"Damn woman! You need to cool your jets!" I said while I laughed at her antics. I had to text Niall to tell him we had arrived, so I made up an excuse, telling her I had to text my mom.

"Hurry up!" she whined, but kept smiling regardless as she looked toward the arena.

_Jetta: We have arrived! And she is still clueless! You're welcome._

_Niall: Sick! Can't wait to see her again and meet u! By the way, at guest services, say the tickets are under 'Bob Barker" x_

I laughed a Niall's choice of a fake name, Channing looked at me for a second as she narrowed her eyes, but I just waved my hand at her and said I'd tell her later.

_Jetta: lol... Bob Barker...really Niall?_

_Niall: yea... i figured chan would get a little freaked out if she heard you ask for the tickets under my name. yaknow? & i just so happened to be watching The Price is Right at the time I called Guest Services. x_

_Jetta: kk see ya in a few._

_Niall: See you! xx_

After shoving my phone into my bra, (hey don't judge, I don't have any pockets), I walked up behind Jetta and linked arms with her before speaking in a lame British accent, "Shall we?"

She gave me an ecstatic grin in return, "We shall," she replied in a rather convincing British accent. I shook my head and laughed... this bitch was good at everything.

**Channing's P.O.V**

After retrieving our tickets, oddly enough under the name of Bob Barker, we entered the crowded arena. For an instant I was reminded of the fangirls at the signing, this scene in front of me was similar... only 500 times worse. We were pushed and shoved, although not intentionally, it was still a pain in the ass to get through the crowd. I was still giddy at the fact that we were actually going to see them preform. I would get to see Niall jump... Louis hip thrust... Liam grab his crotch... Harry's prominent neck veins... and hear Zayn hit his perfect high notes! Overall I couldn't wait to just witness all of the boys acting goofy and ridiculous with my own eyes, rather than through a computer screen. I always watched last years concerts on You Tube, and my favorite part was when they messed up Harry's solo in What Makes You Beautiful, as well as their crazy antics during the Twitter Q&A.

I was expecting for our seats to actually be quite far away from the stage, I mean... it was only a radio contest. So I pretty much froze in place when Jetta began tugging on my arm trying to pull me toward the barrier that roped of the VIP section from the rest of the seats. I didn't even realize it, but I was squeezing my hands so tightly shut that I winced when I felt my fingernails dig into the palms of my hands. Jetta finally realized I wasn't moving and looked back at me impatiently, giving me a "what the hell" look.

"We have front row seats?" I asked, barely able to get the words out of my mouth.

Jetta gave me a huge devilish grin and walked up the the security guard, after whispering something to him and showing him her ticket he ushered us forward and let us head down toward the stage. I hesitantly approached the front row and watched as Jetta plopped down ungracefully into one of the seats that were front and center.

"Jetta! What freaking radio show would give us seats like this?" I whisper-yelled, considering the arena was packed with screaming fans and the noise only seemed to be getting louder by the second. I slowly took a seat next to her as I waited for her response. There were a lot of girls sitting around us, so at least these seats weren't too exclusive. I turned my attention back toward Jetta.

She pretended to be interested in her nails, blowing on them and rubbing them on her shirt like she was a "baller." I rolled my eyes as she answered, "I guess I've just got some friends in high places," she said with a creepy smile.

I just stared at her, she was obviously still hiding something from me, but I didn't have time to dwell on it because the lights began dimming and the countdown on the big screen started flashing showing past concerts and pictures of the boys. My heart was racing and in those 10 seconds, I left like time was slowing down. I could feel the vibrations from the screaming fans surrounding me, but it was like my head was underwater and it was completely muffled and obscured. I stared wide eyed up at the stage as the countdown hit 6 seconds, knowing that those boys I owe my life to would be appearing in just a few short seconds. This is something I never thought would happen, something I never thought I would experience... something I never thought I deserved.

As the countdown hit one, the ear-splitting noise emanating from the crowd was completely overcome by the sound of blaring music with a peppy beat, as well as the sound of a crisp, clear voice I instantly recognized as Zayn's;

_"Oh I just wanna take you anywhere that you like,_

_we could go out any day, any night,_

_baby I'll take you there, take you there,_

_baby I'll take you there, yeah..."_

As all of the boys bounded on stage and began singing and getting the crowd to go wild, I found my eyes locked on a certain undercover brunette leprechaun. I wasn't even singing along as Harry sang his part because I was almost in a trance, taking all of Niall in. The Take Me Home tour was different in the fact that they didn't wear their signature outfits, so in a way I missed Niall's Target uniform, but I can't deny he looked amazing tonight. His hair was in his new standard quiff and he was wearing a dark, tight v-neck, paired with tight jeans and blue supras. How the hell does that boy make the simplest clothes look so good?

 Jetta was jumping like a lunatic, fist pumping into the air, while I stood like a statue. I was in a frozen state as I watched Niall walk across the stage, throwing his hands up, trying to excite the crowd... however, it's not like the crowd needed his help with that. These girls would probably spaz out if all the boys just sat down on the stage and hummed for two hours.

I watched Nialler and his eyes were scanning the crowd, almost as if he were searching for someone, and that's when I realized his solo came next. He was standing rather close, although about ten feet away and to the left of where I was sitting. In my mind I was torn, did I want him to recognize me? I couldn't be sure. I kept trying to insist that I didn't want him to remember who I was... but as I watched him smile and laugh as his beautiful voice began to radiate throughout the arena, I knew I was just lying to myself.

I about melted at the sound he made when he did that scream/sing thing. I just loved it... ughhh can you say sexual frustrations?

_"Oh, I just wanna show you off to all of my friends,"_

After he sang the first line of his solo, his eyes wandered across me for a second and as he began the next line, I felt my stomach erupt in butterflies as I saw a spark of recognition flare in his crystal blue eyes. He smiled hugely at me and squeezed his eyes shut as he tilted his head upward for a brief moment before belting out the next line, actually it was my favorite line of the song, because it was so silly; I felt like only Niall Horan could make lyrics such as those sound hot as hell;

_"Making them drool down their chiny chin chins!"_

He sang strongly as he adorably grabbed at his chin like he always did. His eyes roamed the crowd once more to find mine as he finished his solo, an enormous smile still evident on his face;

_"Baby be mine tonight, mine tonight,_

_baby by mine tonight, yeah!"_

He did a little jump at the end and I about died right then and there, and that's when I woke up and began singing and jumping along with Jetta. The boys jumped around the stage, full of energy, and it was just something that no matter what kind of mood you were in, their enthusiasm would make you smile. They were just normal boys, having fun; and I was just a normal girl who deserved to have some fun too. I decided to just let go, I threw my hands up and smiled up toward the ceiling. Usually I'm the girl smiling at the ground, but not tonight. No... tonight, I was going to be the one living in the moment, feeling beautiful because those five boys on stage... insisted that I was.


	8. All of Channing's Little Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically Channing and Jetta are twerking at the concert, and then Niall pulls Channing on stage to serenade her *gasp*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dude, I realize that this chapter is like hella cliché and I apologize, but you have to understand, when I started this last year, Little Things had just been released! So it wasn't so overdone back then... so I'm sorry if you at all feel like this chapter is cheesy and overdone, but I think I was able to make it as realistic as possible, given the situation. Let me know what you think :)  
> Cringy or cute?

**Niall's P.O.V**

There are not enough adjectives in the human language to describe how nervous, giddy, and excited I felt. Showtime was a mere five minutes away, and I'd just gotten confirmation from Jetta that they had taken their seats. I chugged my third bottle of water as I heard someone approach me from behind,

"Mate, you're really going to regret drinking all of that water when you're on stage and jumpin around," Liam mused, patting me lightly on the shoulder.

I stopped mid-chug and pulled the bottle away from my mouth, "I suppose yer right," I replied as I recapped it and tossed it toward the couch where Harry was sitting. He glanced up when the bottle smacked his leg with a smile on his face,

"Yeah you don't want to be like Bieber and end up throwing up on stage," Harry chuckled.

"Oi, well lucky fer me I wasn't drinkin' milk," I said with a dismissive laugh. As I turned toward the door where Paul had suddenly appeared at,

"Alright boys, let's go," he said hurriedly as he waved his hand in the direction of the stage. When we were standing so close to the crowd, the sound was deafening. At least back in the dressing rooms the noise was rather muffled, but being this close to the crowd, especially with no music playing, was damn near ear-splitting, even with my stage ears in.

As we all lined up, with Zayn in front, the countdown began and that's when I felt my heart jump into my throat. I nervously began shaking my head and rolling my shoulders, trying to calm down. I had never felt so anxious before a concert before, but I reckon that's because Channing has never been in the audience, front row and center. I just wanted this show to be great for her. Louis noticed my anxious state since he was standing behind me and slapped my shoulder,

"Niall! Just be yourself. According to those letters, that's what she loves about you. Just be the goofy, little Irish dork I know you can be! And all the girls love..." he said with a smirk.

"Thanks man... I think," I said with a laugh as the countdown hit one and the music started up. Zayn was the first one to run on stage since he started the song, and all the rest of us came bouncing on right after him.

The crowd was absolutely insane. It's just the biggest rush in the world to be out on that stage in front of all of those people, knowing that every single one of them took time out of their day and money out of their wallets just to watch me preform tonight. It sometimes felt like just yesterday I was walking out on that stage in front of Simon and the rest of the judges.

For some reason with all the commotion going on and the special lighting effects, I couldn't remember exactly where Channing and Jetta were sitting, so I tried to find them without looking too obvious while we continued on singing _"Kiss You."_

I was bounding around the stage, trying to pump the audience up even more, (if that were humanly possible), and circled back around to the front for my solo. As soon as I began singing the first line, I skimmed the crowd once again and was relieved to finally land on Channing's big grey eyes. I studied them while I continued my solo and they looked hopeful. I noticed she was standing completely still, as if she were shell shocked, but as my solo continued and I got really into it, I saw her break from her trance and join in with the overzealous crowd. I felt a pull on my heart as I watched her jump around, pure happiness seemed to be crashing off of her in waves. I smiled even brighter knowing that right now, I was the reason for that happiness.

As "Kiss You" finished, we immediately jumped into the next track and the screams grew insanely loud when the music for  _"Live While We're Young"_ began vibrating out of the speakers and flooding the arena with sound waves. All throughout the song, my eyes kept finding Channing, sometimes our gazes would meet, but for the most part I tried to evenly distribute my attention to the rest of the audience as well. If it were up to me, I'd just stand right in front of her and serenade her for three hours... but right now, that would just be weird and probably awkward. I already tracked her down and got her friend to drag her to this concert, so I think I'd filled my creep quota for the night.

When I was able to look in her direction without being too obvious, I would just feel that happy fluttering rush over me again as I watched her jumping and singing along with us while doing cute little dances. I was happy to see her letting go. As we lined up in the middle of the stage to do "The Row," I found myself laughing and all of the anxiety I felt weighing me down before the show, had slid off my shoulders and scattered along the stage floor. The screams were so loud when we did this stupid dance, it always amused me how much our fans seemed to love our goofy tendencies.

After _"Live While We're Young,"_ I gripped my microphone and spoke to the crowd, "How are yeh doin' tahnight, Saint Louis?!" my voice boomed over the speakers, and I was met with loud screaming as per usual. I'll admit, I had to coach myself to say "Saint Lewis" since that's how it's pronounced, rather than Louie, like our Louis' name. Wow... I just really confused myself there.

"The lads and I would jus really like tah sey thank yah for commin out tah see us! Now let's have sum fuhn!" I yelled into the mic as our band started up the next track; the music rang in my ears and I adjusted my ear piece. The fans went nuts as I began _"Nobody Compares",_ and I found myself smiling broadly out at this crowd of extraordinary people who supported me, without even knowing me.

**Channing's P.O.V**

Niall and I kept making eye contact as the show continued, I could tell that he remembered who I was and I just got that much more excited every time his eyes met mine, it happened so often that I knew it wasn't by accident. I tried to watch the other boys as they preformed on stage but I always found my attention pulled back to the Irish blond, and as they began their third song, I realized I was staring at Niall again. Wow, I swear every time he looks over here I'm just staring at him... he's going to think I'm insane. 

That thought led me to wonder if he thought it was weird that I was here, let alone in the front row when I adamantly explained that I'd probably never get to come to a concert... maybe that's why he kept looking over at me. After my mind came to that conclusion, I just told myself to shut up as I heard the music begin for _"Nobody Compares",_ which happens to be one of my favorites since it's the only one Niall has ever started.

Jetta looked at me excitedly as she heard the familiar intro music and she grabbed my hand as we jumped up and down listening to the beautiful lilt of Niall's voice ring out;

_"You're so pretty when you cry, when you cry_

_wasn't ready to hear you say goodbye,_

_now you're tearin' me apart, tearin' me apart,_

_you're tearin' me apart..."_

***

After the boys had preformed five more songs from Take Me Home and two from Up All Night, we came to a break in the show where they kind of walked around trying to catch their breath. Of course they had their infamous couch in the middle of the stage so I laughed as Niall plopped down onto it, lying back with his arms and legs sprawled out. They were all pretty sweaty looking, but I'm not going to lie... it was extremely hot.

I looked on in amusement as Harry came towards the couch and fell on top of Nialler like a dead weight; I, as well as the entire audience, burst out in laughter while Niall sat up quickly, pushed Harry over and rolled off the couch, clutching his stomach. I saw him groan as he rested on his hands and knees trying to catch his breath, yet again. Awe... poor Niall. Jetta looked at me with her lip pushed out, obviously pouting for him as well.

Harry's entertainment was short-lived because within a minute, Niall composed himself and began chasing after him. Harry noticed he was being pursued a little too late, because before he could even turn and make a run for it, Niall tackled him to the ground and sat right on his back, keeping him squished to the floor. I kept hearing the fans shouting "Awee Narry!" and I was wanting to join in as well... both Jetta and I ship Narry... hard. Is that weird?

Niall just sat there, with an innocent face, smiling at the crowd, as If he wasn't sitting on a human being or anything.

"Oi! Niall, get your fat arse up!" Harry groaned loudly over his mic, the fans burst out into collective laughter. Of course Daddy Direction decided to step in, and being the responsible daddy that he is, he scooped Niall up like a baby and carried him away from Harry. The audience were in stitches of laughter.

Liam dropped Niall to his feet and he landed quite gracefully while Liam pointed toward the opposite corner of the stage, "I guess I have to separate you two?" he asked in a tone interlaced with authority. Niall crossed his arms over his chest and pouted, "Aye! He started it!" Niall whined as he pointed to Harry who was still lying on the ground, but now Louis was sitting next to him patting his back.

It was seriously adorable, the funny thing is... things like this you'd think were staged, but honestly they weren't. The boys did something different with every show, it was pretty funny how great they were at impromptu situations; it was never boring when it came to watching them.

Liam pointed his finger at Niall, "No dessert tonight!" he scolded him playfully.

Niall's jaw dropped and his eyes grew to the size of saucers, "No!" he shouted loudly, playing along, even though I could see a slight fear in his eyes that Liam seriously would withhold his dessert. The best thing about these sort of little games they play is that the arena actually gets really quiet so everyone can hear what's going on, so a lot of the time the crowd can interact with the boys. I heard a voice screaming a few feet to the right of me, and when I turned to see what the commotion was, I about doubled over with laughter as I watched a girl screaming to gain Niall's attention, waving a box of twinkies.

"I got you, Niall!" she yelled out as she pulled her arm back and tossed the twinkies the 15 or so feet toward the stage. They landed along the front and Niall quickly rushed toward the box, ripping it open and shoving one into his mouth. He looked in the direction the box flew from and pointed at the girl who just threw it, "Thank yeh! See, Liam! Ourgirls won' letmeh shtarve!" he yelled dramatically with his mouth full of twinkie. The audience was laughing and "awwing" and screaming. I'll admit I caught myself just standing there smiling like an idiot, but I couldn't help it... Niall was just too adorable. How was it possible for him to be such a cutie, yet an look like absolute sex God at the same time? I just didn't understand it.

Liam was laughing as he shook his head, "Niall, missing one dessert does not qualify as 'starving,'" he said as he put his fingers into mock quotation marks.

By this time, Niall was already about to unwrap a third twinkie, and my stomach was hurting from laughing so hard. Zayn swooped in and snatched the box out of Niall's hand as well as the half eaten twinkie out of his mouth, "I'll take those!" he said with a grin and tossed the snacks to a body guard just off to the side of the stage. While the guard caught the twinkie box, he let the half eaten twinkie just land on the floor with a "plop."

Jetta nudged me in the rib, speaking inbetween her giggles, "How much you wanna bet that one of these lunatics tries to get that half eaten twinkie after the show?" she asked and motioned toward the discarded snack. I couldn't help it, I began laughing a little too loudly, causing Niall to glance my direction for a second before turning to Zayn and unleashing his wrath.

"Whatah waste!" he complained to the Bradford bad boy. As he crossed his arms over his chest again, "Yer all so mean tah me!" he pouted once more. Zayn shrugged his shoulders as he ruffled Niall's hair gently, careful not to mess up his quiff.

"You were about to inhale three of those things in under three minutes... I think it was my responsibility to step in, mate," he said with a big, gleaming smile.

"Thank you Zayn!" Liam agreed and then turned back toward the audience, he pointed to the girl who threw the twinkies, "I'm blaming you if he pulls a Bieber and throws up on stage tonight!" Liam yelled trying to look stern, but you could see a small smile tugging at his lips.

The girls cheeks turned a little pink and she giggled, "I'll take full responsibility, Daddy Payne!" she hollered back playfully. The audience buzzed with laughter and "ewws."

The crowd that was close enough to hear this exchange was in hysterics, and I felt a little bad for the people who were sitting farther way, because they probably had no idea what was going on. The boys spent a few minutes grouping together on the stage as they waited for the crowd to calm down again. Niall ended up sitting on the couch with his legs resting on Lou's lap and harry was sitting on the ground below Louis.

Liam was standing next to Zayn with his arm slung over his shoulder and began speaking again, "So as you all may know, we like to take a little time to open up a Twitter Q&A session; and these are some of the tweets you sent in!" he yelled out as the giant screen over their heads revealed the first tweet.

**"Can each of you try to do a cartwheel?"** **-Taryn   Section 118 Row 22 Seat 19**

Zayn read off the screen, and then turned to the rest of the boys, "Well, lads?" He asked, first looking at Liam, "can we?"

Well, I can do a handstand... not so sure about a cartwheel... but I guess I can give it a go!" He said excitedly.

It was pretty funny to witness all of the boys attempt to do their cartwheels, honestly, no one was remotely close, and that made it all the better. Seriously, unless you're a male gymnast... how many boys can do a cartwheel?

Niall's actually looked like a really awkward sideways one-handed flip thing, and when he landed he stood up and took a bow. Harry was the last one to go, and he probably won the crowd over when he merely tucked and rolled, resulting in a somersault.

"Haz, I don't think that counts," Louis called out from the couch where he was sitting once again next to Zayn.

"But it's the closest I've got to one! I'm not a gymnast!" he said defensively, as the crowd barked in laughter.

The giant overhead screen changed to the next tweet:

**"Can all of you put on one of the bras that have been thrown on stage?"** **-Tess & Kady   Section 237 Row 9 Seat 4&5**

The fans immediately started laughing as soon as this tweet appeared on the screen, and I stood on my tip toes to get a better look at the stage to see how many bras were present. After Niall read this tweet out, he stood and began walking around collecting the bras.

"Well, it seems we've got a dilemma. We only have four bras tah use at our disposal," he said as he clicked his tongue in a disapproving fashion. As soon as the words left his mouth, at least ten other bras and some underwear came flying at him as well. He adorably tried dodging the flying undergarments and ran back toward the rest of the boys, yelling "Help!" as if they were bombs. I felt like I was going to have some serious abdominal muscles after this concert from all of the constant laughing they were subjecting me to.

In his panic to flee the bra bombs, Niall had dropped the four other braziers he had previously acquired, so Harry (of course), took it upon himself to venture out into the sea of bras, taking his time and quickly examining them before making a final decision and walking back towards the other boys carrying five frilly bras. Typical Harry... choosing the raciest ones he could find!

The crowd laughed again as he specifically handed Louis a bra with stripes and then the rest of the boys fought over which ones they wanted; "Ooh! Give meh tha red one!" Niall said excitedly as he grabbed it from Harry. His enthusiasm was questionable under the current circumstances, but you couldn't help but smile along with him. Niall smiled triumphantly as he clasped the back of the red, lacy bra and he spun a little to model them... and then a groped his chest.

Once they all had their new intimate apparel on, it was quite a sight. Harry was wearing probably the sexiest one of the group, it was black and almost see through, as well as quite large; Louis was sporting the stripes; Niall was in the red lace, Zayn's looked to be one of those Victoria Secret special push up bras, and it was rather pink and frilly; and finally, Liam's was the best because it was actually a One Direction bra, featuring Zayn... so Zayn's face was smiling right over Liam's "boob". God... have I mentioned how much I love these boys?

***

After doing a few more of the silly requests and answering some questions that their fans tweeted in, the boys said they were going to wrap it up with one last tweet. I fanned myself a little because I felt really sweaty and gross from being trapped in between all these other girls; although I was slightly uncomfortable, I was sad that the Q&A was almost over, so far it had been my favorite part, aside from Niall's solos.

Finally the last tweet flashed on the screen, and the crowd began murmuring in excitement once everyone read it;

**"Can you boys pick a lucky fan from the audience to serenade?" -Kortney & Alyson   Section 101  Row 20 Seat 36&37**

For a moment, I felt my heart flutter lightly at how adorable this was going to be for someone. Not even considering the possibility that it could be me. I turned to Jetta and smiled brightly, "Awwe," I cooed softly.

Louis was the one to read this tweet out and he instantly turned knowingly to Niall; in fact all of the boys turned to him, their faces painted with mischievous smiles.

Harry tapped his chin as if he were thinking, "Hmm... Louis, which of us do you think should choose this lucky fan?" he asked lightly as he stared at Niall. At first I thought I was just seeing things, but then a smile broke across my face as I saw Niall's cheeks redden. He was so cute when he was embarrassed... but... wait, why was he embarrassed? I watched on as Liam and Zayn looked like maniacs because of their wide, overly happy smiles.

"Uhh... um... I--..." he stuttered as he scratched the back of his neck and stared at the ground. Liam gave him a pat on the back and pushed him toward the edge of the stage. The crowd was buzzing with excitement as the fans tried to draw Niall's attention in hopes of being chosen for the song. I looked at him, and I felt like a black hole was sitting in my stomach, swallowing up all of my bones and vital organs because when I locked eyes with him, I felt like I was going to melt into a pile of mush. No way. There's no way he's going to pick me. I kept trying to convince myself to just chill out because there are other, more dedicated fans here who would deserve that serenade more than me, and that's when I felt Jetta lightly pinch my elbow.

I looked up again and my eyes caught Niall as he jumped off the stage and strode over in our direction while his body guard followed closely behind. "Oh My God," I said softly to myself. Niall looked a little nervous as he approached me but I could see that his resolve was strengthening with each step he took. The other fans that were standing around me were freaking out because I guess they saw the same thing I did... Niall freaking Horan walking toward them, so they were hoping and praying that he'd choose them.

I again felt the lights and the noise of the room fade as he stood right in front of Jetta and I, after sending a quick wink to Jetta (I'd have to ask her about that later), he extended his hand to me and whispered closely to my ear so I could hear him over the noise, "Do yeh care tah come with meh, love?" he asked sweetly as he held his hand out, waiting for me to accept it. I wanted to jump, I wanted to cry, to scream, to laugh, to throw up. All of these things I wanted to do, but I did the easiest thing I could think of at the time, I smiled and locked my eyes with his as I placed my tiny hand into his warm palm.

**Niall's P.O.V**

As Louis read that final tweet I once again felt my heart drop into my stomach, and I knew instantly who we had all already chosen. Even though this serenade request had totally taken me by surprise, I felt a happy, nervous tingling flow through my veins. I could feel my cheeks blushing while I scratched the back of my neck and as I turned to head off of the stage, I had never felt more nervous in my life. The anxiety I felt before the concert was nothing compared to now... what if she said no? What if she doesn't like attention on her like that? I decided to just ignore my inner rambling; after reading most of her letters, I think I knew her well enough to know she would enjoy something like this.

I approached her slowly as I tuned out all of the over-the-top fans screaming in the crowd. Her eyes grew shiny and wide as I came to a stop directly in front of her. As I gave a quick wink to Jetta, I offered Channing my hand and prayed to every God in the universe that she would accept it. After a second, she granted me a perfect view of her little square teeth and placed her hand in mine. I tried to just keep looking at her face, I didn't want to focus on those scars that were hidden beneath all of those bracelets. Those scars that represented the worst times in her life. Those scars that I planned to help her erase.

 The body guard helped her get over the rope and I walked with her hand and hand up the stairs to get back onto the stage. When we finally made it back on the stage, you could hear a lot of screaming and "awwing" from the crowd, as well as some "boos " from the sour fans who weren't chosen. Those are the fans that pissed me off, they could never be happy for anyone else. I glanced at Channing as we came to stand in front of the rest of the lads, smiling at her flushed cheeks and wide, curious eyes. She looked out into the crowd and stiffened slightly, it really was quite a sight, and probably something she'd never experienced before. I gave her hand a reassuring squeeze and she brought her eyes to mine, granting me a shy smile.

"Hello, Love!" Louis chirped happily into the microphone, "You look lovely this evening," he said with a smile. I could tell she wasn't used to compliments because she kind of smiled softly and looked away back toward the audience as she whispered, "Thanks."

Harry had retrieved a stool from backstage and placed it in the middle of all of us, I tugged her hand a little so that she'd follow me over to the chair and laughed slightly as she released my hand and hopped onto it like a little kid. It was actually really cute. Although I could tell she was nervous, she didn't seem too self conscious, and I liked that, because she had absolutely no reason to be.

Liam stepped forward as he smiled at her, "Well, thanks to Kortney and Alyson, it seems that we're going to sing to you now... is that alright?" he asked kindly.

Her cheeks grew pink again as she nodded her head slightly and placed her hands in her lap.

"Before we start, could we get your name, Love?" he asked with the slightest bit of hesitation.

She tensed up for a moment as she played absentmindedly with her bracelets. She must have been thinking the same thing that was in my mind... Would people realize who she was? At that moment I felt stupid for ever tweeting about her. She could have been my secret... I wish I would have kept her that way, where she could just be mine, but now I've no other choice but to share her with everyone.

Liam held the microphone up to her mouth as the rest of the boys and I got stools and sat down around her; I also retrieved my guitar from one of the stage managers. She slightly shrugged her shoulders and spoke in a strong voice, "Channing," she simply stated. The slight rasp in her voice immediately sent chills up my arms. As soon as she spoke her name, there was a definite murmuring happening throughout the audience, but I was relieved when I didn't hear any boos or vulgar remarks. I glanced into the mass of people, finding Jetta who just gave me an encouraging smile and waved her hands at me in a "shooing" fashion, telling me to sing.

Liam smiled brightly at her, "Well it's good to see you, Channing. This is for you," he said as he took his seat on the last open stool. She blushed slightly at his words, but you could also see a happy glow about her, and it made her all the more alluring to me.

Channing was seated in the middle of us all; the rest of the lads and I were sitting around her in a half circle. I was closest to her, on her left, while Harry was on my right. Zayn, Louis and Liam were curved around the other side, sitting almost across from Harry and me.

I looked away from Channing as I heard Louis speak, "I think we all know what to sing, right lads?" he asked confidently while looking pointedly in my direction, as if asking me for the final confirmation. The audience was still murmuring quite excitedly, but it was just a soft buzzing, no obnoxious screaming like usual. I was actually astounded, because our fans are never this quiet.

We all nodded our heads and I adjusted the strings on my guitar quickly before looking to Liam for his signal. Laim nodded once, telling me to start, and I began softly strumming the guitar frets as Zayn prepared to begin the song; I looked right at Channing, as she looked up to meet my eyes and felt my heart racing as Zayn's familiar solo trickled through my ears. Her pink lips were pulled into a small smile and her shining, watery eyes refused to look away from mine.

**Channing's P.O.V**

Niall was looking at me so intensely, I was afraid I would crack from the pressure his gaze laid on my heart. It was a good pressure though, it felt good to know that he saw me, the real me. As I looked in his eyes I felt safe and protected, maybe even cherished. I only looked away from him as I heard the melodic trill of Zayn's voice so I turned to the left to meet his eyes. He was looking at me kindly as he sang;

_"Your hand fits in mine_ _Like it's made just for me_ _But bear this in mind_ _It was meant to be_ _And I'm joining up the dots with the freckles on your cheeks_ _And it all makes sense to me"_

I continued smiling and looking at Zayn as Liam came in and harmonized with him on the last line. Although I wasn't looking at him, as I listened to Niall strumming his guitar, it made me smile even more.

I moved my attention over to Liam as he sang his part;

_"I know you've never loved_ _The crinkles by your eyes_ _When you smile_ _You've never loved_ _Your stomach or your thighs,_ _The dimples in your back at the bottom of your spine_ _But I'll love them endlessly"_

I found myself smiling once again as Zayn came back in and harmonized with Liam on the last line. Those simple harmonies were one of my favorite parts of this song, they just sounded so beautiful. I swiped a tear off my cheek as both Laim and Zayn continued to sing the chorus together;

_"I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth_ _But if I do_ _It's you_ _Oh, it's you they add up to_ _I'm in love with you_ _And all these little things"_

Knowing Louis was up next, my eyes wandered over to meet his as his soprano voice floated through the air and crawled it's way right under my skin, enveloping me in goosebumps. Aside from Niall's, Louis' voice was my favorite. It was just so high and clear, and when his voice would crack during a song, my body seriously wanted to go into cardiac arrest. His voice was different, and not everyone appreciates it, but I was not one of those people.

I think that's why I love both Niall and Lou's voices so much... because they were different. Of course all of the boys sounded amazing and brilliant,  but those two... they just had a little something extra that gave me chills... something that my ears just considered unique and beautiful.

_"You can't go to bed without a cup of tea_ _And maybe that's the reason that you talk in your sleep_ _And all those conversations are the secrets that I keep_ _Though it makes no sense to me"_

Louis finished his solo as Harry's voice blended in with his on the final line. I gave Lou a grateful smile and he sent me a wink before I turned my attention to both Niall and Harry. I met Niall's eyes for a moment and he gave me a genuine smile before my gaze locked with Harry's. The sad part is, all I wanted to do was stare at Niall throughout this song, but I would never be that rude and just ignore the other boys, they're all important to me.

Harry's deep raspy voice fell from his lips as he sang to me;

_"I know you've never loved_ _The sound of your voice on tape_ _You never want_ _To know how much you weigh_ _You still have to squeeze into your jeans_ _But you're perfect to me"_

 A cute smile was on his face throughout the whole solo, much like in the Little Things music video, it was adorable; as soon as I heard Niall's high voice harmonizing with Harry's on the last line, my eyes raced to meet his. As Niall's cerulean blue orbs pulled me in, I could feel my own eyes beginning to well up with tears. I looked away briefly for a moment to compose myself as they continued on, harmonizing over the chorus together;

_"I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth_ _But if it's true_ _It's you,_ _It's you they add up to_ _I'm in love with you_ _And all these little things"_  
Until this song, I never realized how high and pure Niall's voice sounded when he sang soprano. It just made my head dizzy as I listened to his high voice while he sang literally right in front of me. I was almost frozen in place as their duet ended and Niall's lovely, warm and slightly accented voice sounded throughout the arena, dancing playfully into my ears.

After he sang the first few words, he almost startled me when he quickly stood up from his stool and came to stand even closer to me; so close, I could see every beautiful detail of his face and the lights eliminating off of his braces. I mirrored his actions and stood up as well, I don't know why, it was just my body's automatic reaction. We stood there face to face as he continued to sing to me, while strumming softly;

_"You'll never love yourself half as much as I love you_ _You'll never treat yourself right, darling, but I want you to._

The tears that had been welling up earlier began to overwhelm my eyes as he sang the exact phrase he tweeted me two days ago, and the merciless traitor tears slid down my cheeks in torrents; I didn't bother wiping them away. Instead, I just smiled at this beautiful, kind-hearted boy who whispered beautiful promises to my broken soul;

_If I let you know I'm here for you_ _Maybe you'll love yourself like I love you, oh."_

As he sing the "oh" he closed his eyes tight and leaned his head back, really putting emotion into it. When his solo ended and Harry sang the next part, Niall stopped strumming his guitar for a moment and my breath hitched as he brought his hand forward, his soft fingertips brushing the tears from my cheeks. He smiled softly at me as I tried to pull myself together while Harry finished his second solo;

_"And I've just let these little things slip out of my mouth_ _'Cause it's you,_ _Oh, it's you,_ _It's you they add up to_ _And I'm in love with you_ _And all these little things"_

Niall easily continued the song, swiftly grabbing his guitar and strumming along without missing a beat as they all joined together; their voices blending into one beautiful melody while they sang the chorus a final time.

_"I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth But if it's true It's you, It's you they add up to I'm in love with you And all your little things"_

The entire time I didn't look away from Niall's piercing eyes, even when I heard the other voices wrapping around us. For those few seconds, I didn't hear the whispering crowd, or his fellow band mates; I didn't see the flickering lights and lyrics flashing on the giant screen over our heads. For those few precious moments, it was just Niall and I as his voice wound into the broken bits and pieces of me, trying to mend them... trying to make me whole again.

As the song finished and the audience broke out into applause, Niall and I remained frozen in place. I felt his warm breath blowing across my lips at a quickened pace, causing shivers to creep down my back. I could faintly hear the commotion going on around us, but none of it mattered. Even if this was the last time I ever saw him, I wanted to remember this moment, every detail, for the rest of my life.

I slowly thawed out of my frozen state, and without thinking I sprang forward, wrapping my arms around him and buried my face in his neck. He pulled away from me for barely a second, but only to remove the strap from around his neck and the guitar that was separating us. He merely dropped it to the floor as I felt him tightly embrace me around the waist and press a soft kiss to the top of my head.

I was holding onto him as if he were a mirage that threatened to disappear while my brain tried to climb out of it's muddled and messy state. I slightly registered that we were moving and as I looked up, that's when I realized that Niall had walked us off of the stage, and we were now off to the side, back where no one could see us. 

The roar radiating out from the exuberant crowd was vociferous and the rest of the boys' voices boomed over their mics as they tried to stall; giving Niall a minute to get rid if me. At least that's what I figured would be happening; however, when I looked up and met his eyes, I was just met with a kind smile. His arms still held me firmly around the waist and his eyes were swimming with excitement as he pushed a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Yer hair looks lovely straight," he commented in his beautiful Irish accent as he tugged gently on another strand and let it fall through his fingers. I blushed and looked away as I shyly whispered, "Thank you."

He took my chin in between his fingertips and brought my face up to look into his eyes, "Wait here fer me? " he begged as he reluctantly released the hold he had around my waist. I was about to protest that I needed to find my friend, but he spoke again before I could even form the words in my mind, "I'll send someone for Jetta," he said softly as he pulled me in for one last hug.

My eyes were squeezed tight as the smell of his skin mixed with his fading cologne locked me into this moment in time. I felt like no matter what, that scent would never leave my memory; all I'd have to do is think about it and I'd be back here again, right in his arms.

He pressed a soft kiss to my temple and squeezed my hand gently before releasing me and heading back toward the stage. He looked over his shoulder at the last minute, "I'll be right back, I promise," he called over to me before disappearing back into the noise and screaming that surrounded the stage, and only seemed to get louder at his his sudden return.

My heart was racing, my eyes were stinging, my cheeks were burning, and my breathing was shallow as I felt a light tapping on my shoulder. I quickly turned around to see Jetta standing there, smiling like a Cheshire cat. I didn't even hesitate to question her knowing expression as I threw my arms around her, squeezing her half to death. After a few moments Jetta pried my arms off of her and backed up a step or two before speaking with a cheeky smile, "See... I told you tonight would be amazing. Now kiss my ankle boots, peasant!" she said in mocking dominance.

A million questions tossed around in my head, but I pushed them all aside as I hugged Jetta to me again and listened to the boys while they sang their final number, _What Makes You Beautiful_. There would be plenty of time for questions later, but for right now I just wanted to live in the moment. This unthinkable, unimaginable, unbelievable moment.


	9. Pimps and Hoes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Channing and Jetta get invited to hang out with One Direction back at their hotel room (cus you know this would totally happen in real life *laughs hysterically* bc yeah right... but just roll wit it)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, it's a fanfic. Some parts will be cheesy and ridiculously cliché... just accept that and move on with yo life brotha.

**Niall's P.O.V**

As Harry finished his solo and I began singing along with him, trying to harmonize our voices, I locked my eyes with Channing and refused to look away. I tuned out everything and everyone as I sang; I was no longer preforming for an arena full of thousands of fans. At this moment I was only preforming for Channing. One girl that I met for five minutes barely three days ago. One girl with mesmerizing grey eyes, brown hair, and a story written on her wrists. One girl who I was willing to fall for... One girl I may have already fallen for.

When Harry's voice fell away and only mine could be heard, I found myself unable to stay contained on the uncomfortable stool; I just wanted to be closer to her. I stood and walked so that I was standing right in front of her, and I was happy to see Channing get to her feet almost as quickly, with the same fire in her eyes. I continued singing to her, willing her to believe the words I was saying. Asking her to trust me, begging her to take a risk.

I wasn't sure exactly what this connection I felt to her was, all I knew was that I wanted to find out. I needed to know her, more than just through her pretty penmanship. I wanted to learn her fears, her bad habits, her hopes, and her happy memories. I wanted to learn about everything bad that ever happened to her, no matter how hard it would be to hear it. I wanted to comfort and protect her. This girl who should be a stranger, just felt like a long lost friend; and since three days ago, all I knew for sure was that everything had changed.

I saw her eyes filling up with tears and it broke my heart as they began spilling out, wetting her eye lashes and cheeks. She didn't bother to wipe them away, she wasn't ashamed of them. Instead, she just stood there, giving me the most genuine smile. When my solo finished I immediately reached out, erasing the tear tracks from her cheeks with a swipe of my fingers. Her eyes glistened as she watched me grab my guitar once more to finish the song. As the lads and I joined together, playing off each others voices, Channing never looked away. She just kept her eyes trained on me as if I were still the only one in the room.

When the song finished, there was absolute silence for a moment. I was standing so close that I could smell her cherry chap stick, which did not help matters as I desperately tried to catch my breath. Only when the cheering of the crowd knocked Channing out of her trance did she reach for me, hugging me tightly around the neck. I readjusted her as I removed the guitar strap and then pulled her back so that she was firmly against me. I kissed the top of her head lightly, nearly feeling overwhelmed by the smell of her hair. I don't even know how to describe it, it just smelled damn good. As we clung to each other for a few seconds, I realized that I wanted a more private moment with her, so I quickly walked us both off the stage, toward the side where the managers were watching me questionably.

Stupidly, the first thing out of my mouth was me telling her that her hair looked nice straight. I wanted to give myself a facepalm. As she blushed at my compliment, I wanted nothing more than to kiss her soft pink lips, but I fought the urge. I had to remind myself that I wanted to be her friend first. She needed me, and I wasn't going to let my hormones get in the way of that.

After I told her that someone would bring Jetta back to meet up with her, I placed a kiss to her temple. Her warm skin felt like an electric shock to my lips, and the feeling was lost all too soon after I pulled away. As I promised her that I'd be right back, I reluctantly tore my eyes away from her and focused back on the lads who were waiting for me center stage.

I felt a blush creeping up my neck when the crowd burst out in screams as I reappeared on stage. As I looked out into the mass of confused and excited faces, I felt nothing but a sinking feeling in my stomach. What on earth would they be thinking after that display? Who knows what could be circulating around twitter already. I looked each of my band mates in the eye for a moment, all of them giving me encouraging smiles, asking silently if I was ready to continue. Honestly I wasn't; I wanted to escape this place, escape the prying eyes of the fans, escape into a life where I could have a chance with Channing. As I glanced back to the frantic crowd, I knew this wouldn't be easy for them to accept. Although most fans were loving and supportive, there were also hateful people that would drag all of Channing's skeletons out of the closet. People who would mock her, talk down to her, and rip her to shreds. People who would hurt her and reopen old wounds. People that could cause her to relapse... cause her to cut.

I immediately shook the thoughts from my mind, I was already getting ahead of myself. We could be friends. I would be her FRIEND. I would never drag her into this life, especially if she was vulnerable. Although I loved my fans, they didn't seem to realize how much they unknowingly influenced most of the decisions I made regarding my life. I was their puppet for the most part, and even though I loved my life, I couldn't help but feel the cold, hard fingers of loneliness gripping my shoulder. Would anyone ever be brave enough to try to be with me? Would I ever get a chance at love?

The music began and we continued, singing three more songs and ending with "What Makes You Beautiful." Although I still felt the adrenaline pumping through my veins, I just wasn't as into my performance after my realization: I have little to no control over my own life. These people that filled this arena, these people that made me signs, and bought our albums, and dedicated blogs to us... These people are the ones that called the shots. Maybe I'd have a sit down with Liam and ask how he managed with Dani for so long. Granted, they did split up last year, mostly because of his fame... but they still made it work for a few years before she couldn't take it anymore.

That was my worst fear. Finding my girl, my princess... and losing her because of the pressure and hate from overzealous and possessive fans. It's the main reason I never bothered with having a girlfriend, but now things were different. Things felt like they were changing, whether I liked it or not. I couldn't deny my chance at happiness because I was afraid; it wouldn't be fair to me and it wouldn't be fair to Channing. As I glanced off to the side stage where Jetta was hugging Chan, I realized that any time with her would be better than nothing. I didn't care what kind of label we had, I didn't care about the possible hate. I wasn't going to be afraid to live my life... and hopefully my fans would come to accept that. Even if things don't work out... even if things eventually fall apart because of my lifestyle, I didn't care. Any amount of time that I could love her, comfort her, and protect her would be worth it.

**Channing's P.O.V**

I won't lie, I felt extremely awkward as I saw Niall and the four other boys approaching Jetta and me. I still had this horrible feeling that he would just tell me to "get lost," but of course, I was surprised every time I came face to face with him. His big beautiful smile caused the corners of my lips to tug up into a big grin as well. I could still hear the roar of the audience, and in that moment I realized how thankful I was that Jetta and I wouldn't have to suffer the fate of trying to escape that madness.

As Niall finally came to stand in front of me, he smiled down at me, giving me a simple, "Hi."

I felt stupid as this ridiculous two letter greeting made me smile like a crazed lunatic, "Hi," I replied as I twisted the bracelets on my wrists.

He was about to speak again, but I was suddenly bombarded with multiple sweaty boys throwing their arms around me, and everyone was speaking at once. An annoyed expression appeared on Niall's face and he smiled weakly at me as I greeted the rest of the boys.

"Channing! How've you been?" Louis asked me, obviously still pumped up from the show.

"Fine, how about you Louis?" I replied with a smile.

"Fantastic!" He then turned to Jetta with an eyebrow raised, "And this is...?" He trailed off as he subtly asked for her name.

I brought my hand to my mouth as I softly gasped, "Oh! Sorry, this is Jetta." I said as I introduced her to everyone. "She was supposed to come to the signing with me, but bailed," I complained with a wink in her direction.

When I got a look at Jetta's face, I quickly did a double take and about slapped her upside the head. She was standing there, with wide eyes, smiling as if she just escaped an insane asylum. I cleared my throat forcefully to get her attention. After another moment of extensively eye-raping the boys, she finally shook her head and turned to face me.

"Sorry... was I fangirling?" she asked me. I heard some light hearted snickering from the boys as I pointed my thumb in Jetta's direction, "Probably a good idea she couldn't come," I said with a laugh.

Jetta shrugged her shoulders and proceeded to spark up a conversation with Harry. Sometimes I wished I could be more like her... she never cared what anyone thought of her. She was always true to herself.

My eyes found Nialler again, and he was walking toward me with two water bottles in his hands. He came to a stop in front of me and offered me one; I smiled graciously as I took the bottle and about sucked it dry. He gave me an impressed look as he opened his own bottle and gingerly sipped at it. I gave him a funny look. Honestly, after all of that crap he did on stage, how could he not be more thirsty? He smiled cutely for a second before speaking, "Yeah, I chugged meh first one o'er there," he said pointing toward the refreshment table.

"Ah, well that explains it," I replied with a smile.

It was sort of a funny situation, I could tell we both had a million things weighing on our minds, but neither of us spoke a word. We stood there in a comfortable silence as the commotion created by the boys encircled us. I hardly noticed them though... it's like we were in our own calm little bubble. A bubble that both of us were terrified would burst.

"Did yeh have any plans fer tha rest a tha night?" Niall asked curiously, as he untwisted and retwisted the cap on his water bottle. I smiled slightly at the nervous habit.

I began to fidget with the hem of my shirt while I answered, praying that he wasn't trying to brush me off, "No, I don't think so... honestly I didn't even know about these plans until we were parked in front of the arena," I said with a laugh, "I still don't know how Jetta managed to get tickets."

Niall chuckled for a second, "Yah... sorry 'bout that. It was a suhprise," he said with a sheepish smile.

My brow furrowed as I absorbed his words, "Wait... what?" I asked as I felt a confusing fog overtake my brain.

The smile dropped from his face, "Uh... well... I, uh.." he stuttered for a moment before forming the words, "I mean, I asked Jetta tah bring yeh... so dont be mad at her," he scrambled with his words. He was acting as if he was afraid of my reaction, which I didn't understand at all; aside from that, he was trying to cover for my skank of a best friend who had absolutely no problem with lying to me.

I smiled at him, "Niall, I'm not mad at anyone. You set this up... for me to come tonight?" I asked, tucking my hair behind my ears.

He nodded, almost looking bashful. His sweetness almost made me want to start crying.

I cound't help myself, I reached out for him again and hugged him to me. However, before I could bury myself into his warm embrace, I felt a smile form on my lips as he beat me to it, burying his own face into the crook of my neck, and hugging me tightly.

"Th--Thank you." I said, my voice sounding thick with emotion. Without breaking our embrace, I pulled my face away from his shoulder to look into his eyes, "But... how'd you even find me? Or Jetta?" I asked, honestly curious.

"Yer letters, Channing. I've been readin' them, yeh know. You told meh I answered a tweet once so..." As soon as he revealed this, I suddenly felt like an open book to him. Competely naked, and unable to hide under any kind of security blanket. He knew all of my secrets. I suppose I figured he'd read them, but assuming someone has done something is very different from someone actually telling you to your face that they did something. Although I didn't mind he read them, I mean, that's obviously why I gave them to him... but now that I know for sure that he'd read them, I felt extremely exposed. It didn't matter that my clothes covered the scars on my thighs or my bracelets covered my wrists, because he knew about all of it. He knew how weak I was. He knew how ugly I was no matter how much I tried to cover it up. He knew that I was used. He knew that I was trash.

I guess I didn't really think giving him those letters through. Although, it's not like I thought I would ever see him again. So at the time, I couldn't even fathom the amount of embarrassment I was feeling now... having to face him. Knowing that he knows my past. Knowing that he knows EVERYTHING.

I turned away from him as I tried to compose myself, I could feel the immediate burn of tears stinging my eyes. Although I'd been crying earlier, these tears were different, they weren't happy tears. They were tears that came from a sense of uncertainty... from a fear of being judged by one of the most important poeple in my life, even though I wasn't important in his. I felt like truckloads of memories and grief were being poured back into my body. I took a few steps away, but he wasn't having any of it, because he immediately put his hand on my shoulder, keeping me in place. Rather than turning me around to face him, he swiftly walked around to stand in front of me again.

"Please don't run from me," he pleaded. Nothing but sincerity shone in his eyes. I looked at him after that... really looked at him. He was a nervous, curious, beautiful boy who seemed tongue tied and terrified of what he might say. His demeanor was cautious as he tried to understand me.

I felt like we were going to have a breakthrough but then Louis ran into my sight, asking me adamantly if "Jetta and I could come over to play," and the moment I had with Niall was lost. I found myself laughing at Lou's question and nodded my head. Louis smiled brightly as he grabbed my hand as well as Jetta's and sprinted toward the back exit.

"Wait!" Jetta yelled out as she skidded to a halt, causing Louis and me to stop suddenly as well, "my car is parked here," she commented.

Zayn spoke up from behind us, "It's alright babe, one of us can drop you back off later, yeah?" he said as he walked past the three of us who were still standing in the middle of the doorway. Before we could continue to be dragged by Louis out the door, I suddenly felt warm hands around my waist and someone hoisted me over their shoulder, "I'll jus be takin' this one, Lou," Niall said, laughter wrapping around his voice.

"Niall!" I yelped as my vision obscured and all I could see was my long hair falling over my face and Niall's backside. I wasn't going to complain about that though.

"Yes?" I heard him ask, innocently.

"I can walk ya know..." I said with a laugh. I head laughter to the side of me and saw that Harry was walking a little ways behind us.

I reached my arms out slightly, "Care to help?" I asked, making my voice purposely sound pitiful.

As soon as I asked this question, I felt Niall's grip tighten significantly as he turned his head to find Harry, "Don't even think 'bout it," he warned. I couldn't help but laugh at his attempt to sound menacing. He was about as scary as a baby penguin.

I stopped complaining after that because, like I said earlier, I wasn't minding the view, and I liked being held by him. I liked the closeness. Call me a prude if you want, but I rarely was comfortable with being this close to the opposite sex. The walk was rather short though because after just a few minutes we were in the parking lot and Niall was dropping me gently to my feet. I smiled up at him and blushed a little as I saw his eyes travel over my lips.

"C'mon let's get out of here before we're spotted!" Liam urged. "You know our fans are always lurking in the shadows... it's quite amazing actually." He said, skaking his head as he disappeared into the van.

I laughed lightly and followed the rest of the group as they clambered inside. There were only two rows, each holding three seats. I quickly did a head count and realized that there weren't going to be enough spots. There was only two seats left and Harry, Niall and I were still waiting to get in.

"There's not enough room guys," I said hesitantly. Niall was in front of me and crawled over Laim and Zayn to grab the window seat in the back. Before I knew what was going on, Harry pushed past me and grabbed the last seat, in between Jetta and Louis in the front row.

I looked around, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do. Should I go sit in the front by myself? I was about to turn around when I felt someone grab a hold of my hand and tug me towards the back row, I looked up and realized that Niall was the one dragging, with a sly smile on his face. Liam and Zayn helped move my legs over the seats as well as themselves and Niall spun me around so that I was facing the front of the van.

I caught Jetta's eyes and she was giving me a mischievous smile. I felt a little bit like a rag doll as Niall adjusted me onto his lap, but once he got situated, he grabbed the seat belt, pulling it across the both of us, and then sat back with one arm resting on my hip and the other wrapped along the back of the seat. I was pretty happy that I was facing away from him though, because I know that my face was absolutely on fire. This however, didn't go unnoticed by the jerks in the front row though.

"Awe... Channy, are you blushing? How sweet," Louis gushed as he pinched my cheek. I gave him a death glare and mouthed for him to shut up.

Harry burst out into laughter as he watched on, "Oh, she's feisty!" He said as I looked over at Louis, who was still grinning like an evil magician.

"Aye just leave 'er alone, would'ya?" I heard an Irish voice protest from over my shoulder. I began to relax into him a little bit at that point, and chills ran up my arms as I felt Niall lean forward and whisper against my hair," Sorry, they can get annoying, just ignore 'em," he apologized.

I turned my head slightly to meet his crystal blue eyes, which actually looked very dark in the dim van, "It's alright, they're probably just jealous," I whispered back.

I guess I'm not the best at whispering because Louis immediately spoke up, "I am not jealous! For your information, I got to sit on Nialler's lap the other day," he said with a smug smile before sticking out his tongue. I laughed at his silliness before turning toward Niall and raising my eyebrow, "Yeh, I wish I could sey that he's jokin;" he mumbled.

"Do I even want to know?" I asked.

He blushed slightly, "The rental car we used from the airport only had four seats," he said defensively.

Jetta laughed from the front row, "Awee, Nouis!" she cooed as she clapped her hands excitedly.

All of the boys heads turned to look at her and gave her a look. I snorted slightly but started coughing to cover it up, causing the boys to turn and give me "the look."

Niall was the first to break and started chuckling, "Apparently, Jetta here is quite the 'Zouis' shipper," he said while laughing at Zayn's expression.

"Jetta! How could you?" Zayn asked her pretending to sound upset.

"Zayn there's so use hiding it now, apparently Jetta knows the truth," Louis said as he shrugged his shoulders in defeat.

As I laughed at their banter I glanced out the window to see the city lights flying by. Jetta cleared her throat, gaining my attention once again, "Oh well, since I'm correct about my ship being real, Channing, what about yours?" she asked with a knowing smile.

The boys all looked at me again and I felt Niall squeeze my hip slightly as he muffled his laughter by putting his face on the back of my shoulder.

"Shut up, Jetta!" I said with a glare.

"Alright, alright... what is it? Oh wait, let me guess. Larry? You're one of those Larry shippers, aren't you? Louis said in a bored tone as he gave me scrutinizing look. You could tell how sick he was of all the Larry crap... but unfortunately for him, it just seemed to be a ship that wouldn't die!

"Close, but no," I heard someone answer for me, and it wasn't Jetta as I had expected it to be. My eyes widened and I looked over my shoulder to meet Niall's. He was really trying to hold in his laughter now... and let me say, the face he was making was just as cute as those Pepsi commercial outtakes from last year. Damn him and his cute face!  For a second I forgot why I was looking at him, but then it came rushing back when I heard Jetta laughing in the front.

I narrowed my eyes at him, "How do you know who I ship?" I asked apprehensively.

His smile broke out and he started one of his infamous "laugh like Niall" moments. A bunch of warm fuzzy feelings floated around in my tummy as I heard and felt him laughing over my shoulder.

"Sorry Chan," Jetta said nonchalantly, not sounding sorry at all. What a hag.

The rest of the boys just looked at me, waiting for my confession, "Okay, so I don't really understand what the big deal is but I ship Narry. There are you happy?" I asked both Jetta and Niall.

Niall kept laughing as he answered, "Not really... I don't like the thought of people 'shipping' me with my best mates, but I especially don't like to know that YOU do it..." he trailed off.

"Why?" I asked, him as his eyes grew wide and he started stuttering to backtrack, as if he could take his words back.

Harry leaned toward me and opened his mouth dramatically, "You wanna know why?" he asked with a wicked smile.

I nodded my head and he continued, "Because Nialler here thinks he might L---" Harry was quickly cut off by Niall's hand flying over his mouth. The van was erupting in laughter while I sat there, dumbfounded. Niall's cheeks reddened a little, as he replied, his hand still clamped over Harry's mouth, "B--becase you just seem like a Lilo shipper," he covered lamely while looking away from me. He quickly withdrew his hand from Harry's mouth, with a disgusted look on his face as he wiped his hand on his jeans, "Ew! Harry!" he said looking grossed out. Apparently Harry had licked his hand, which made me burst out into laughter with everyone else.

"Awee, Narry!" Jetta cooed out again. I nodded my head in agreement with her, "Yeah.. um this little display is not helping me lose faith in Narry," I said while shaking my head as Niall rolled his eyes.

After a few more minutes of Jetta and I teasing them all about their bromances, we finally pulled up to the hotel. Since we were in the furthest seat, Niall and I waited for everyone to climb out. I turned around and smiled at him, as I motioned my eyes toward the seat belt, reminding him to unbuckle us.

"Oh, yeh, sorry," he laughed as he clicked the belt and it flew across me and back into place. I got up and maneuvered toward the door with Niall close behind me. As I jumped out, I landed on the asphalt and stumbled slightly, since Niall was right by my side he easily reached over to steady me. Apparently, everyone had already made a run for the hotel doors because the only thing I saw in front of my were the backs of two figures as they sprinted away. I looked up to Niall as he looked down at me, "I'll race ya?" I asked with a smirk.

"Ok!" He said, sounding excited.

"Ok, when I say go..." I trailed off and smiled because I'm a big fat cheater, "Ready.... set..." I didn't even bother saying "Go", because I just took off in the direction I saw everyone else running.

"Hey!" I heard Niall protest from behind me as I scampered away.

**Niall's P.O.V**

"Ready.... set..."

All of a sudden, Channing took off toward the Hilton hotel in which we were staying. That little cheater.

"Hey!" I called out as I finally woke up to chase after her.

I felt a smile overtake my face as I heard her tinkling laugh ring out throughout the parking lot. Although she was fast I easily caught up to her and grabbed a hold of her waist, making her slow down to a stop. She was laughing whole heartily as I scooped her up and continued walking toward the hotel.

"If yeh wanted meh to carry you, all you had tah do was ask," I said with a grin as I flipped her over my shoulder.

I reached the elevator and punched the the button for the twelfth floor. The ride in the elevator was pretty calm, she didn't fight me about holding her, she actually remained still through most of the ride, until the end where I all of a sudden felt her hands on either side of my waist. At first I didn't know what she was doing, but then I quickly figured it out as she started squeezing at my sides and poking at my ribs causing me to wriggle around because it actually tickled. The doors dinged as they opened and I tried to walk out but she was still tickling my sides so I was having a little trouble walking.

I readjusted her on my shoulder, trying to get some relief, and she did stop for a minute, but that was only until I felt her knuckle digging right into the middle of my back. I pretty much went into body spasms as I tried to squirm away from her, which was pretty hard, considering I was the one holding her to me.

She was laughing as she noticed my inability to keep walking, and eventually I fell down to my knees which made it easy for her to escape my grasp. Even though she was free, she didn't stop tickling me with her knuckle in the middle of my back. I was unaware that I was even ticklish there! I fell over and rolled over onto my back in order to cut off her easy access which actually caused her to fall on top of me. I smiled up at her excited eyes as I took in her messy hair and flushed cheeks.

She stopped her assault on me for a second as she looked into my eyes and smiled softly.

"What in the Hell was that?!" I asked, causing her to break out into giggles.

"Sorry, I guess Jetta didn't warn you? I'm the Tickle Queen!" and as she said it she put her hands up and wiggled her fingers in a tickling motion. I gave her a funny look.

She rolled her eyes, "No, I'm serious... I can find ANYONE'S weak spot, and Mr. Horan, it looks like your spot is the middle of your back. Do you need me to remind you... ?" she asked with a wink.

She pretended like she was going to try to dig underneath me to tickle my back again, but I stiffened and tried rolling away from her, "NO!" I said with a laugh as I put my hands up in surrender.

She smiled at me sweetly, "Awe, you're no fun," she sighed.

I heard the door open at the end of the hall and saw Jetta peeking her head out and looking at us, "What's with all the commotion?" she asked in a stern voice, "Oh my gosh you guys! Quit having sex in the hallway and get in here!" she said as she threw Channing a wink.

Channing looked mortified, but she composed her face to look at me, she smiled at me sweetly, "We'll finish THIS later," she whispered and stuck her tongue out at me briefly as she pushed off of my chest and jumped to her feet. I kind of lay there for a second, feeling like a turtle stuck on his back. Seriously I felt like I was completely incapacitated while she was tickling my back. It wasn't funny 'ha-ha' tickling... no. This was torture tickling. Sick and twisted torture tickling.

"Jetta! Oh my God!" Channing whined at her friend's ridiculous accusations as she hurried away from me and ran towards where Jetta was standing. After smacking her lightly on the arm, Chan turned towards me with a big smile, "By the way, Niall, I win..." she trailed off in a taunting voice and disappeared into the hotel room.

I laughed out loud to the empty hall way as I lay my head back on the carpeted floor and looked up at the ceiling.

"Yeah.. Channing, you did. You won a lot more than a race," I mumbled to myself, but felt a smile sneak across my face.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

The boys and I had run up to the hotel room, leaving Niall and Channing to fend for themselves, although it's not like they minded. I swear, those two just met, but the sexual tension that radiated between them was enough to suffocate a room full of people.

I plopped down on the couch next to Liam, still feeling quite mesmerized by the fact that I was in the same room as One Direction. He turned and smiled at me as he yelled for the other boys to quit rough housing in the kitchen. After he spoke we saw Zayn walk out of the kitchen, Harry walk in from the bathroom and Louis peek his head in from the balcony.

"Who's rough housing, and why was I not invited?" Louis inquired to the rest of the room.

We all just kind of looked at each other for a moment before I heard the noise and laughing again, but this time I could tell it was coming from the hallway. I turned to Liam and smiled as he nodded his head at me. I hurried over to the door and peeked my head out to see Niall lying on the ground in a supine position. While Channing hovered over him, laughing. I smiled at the scene in front of me and only felt slightly bad when I interrupted it.

"What's with all the commotion? Oh my gosh you guys! Quit having sex in the hallway and get in here!" I yelled sternly to the goofballs on the floor. Jetta stuck out her tongue at Niall and whispered something to him before hopping up and running toward me with an embarrassed look on her face, "Jetta! Oh my God!" she said dramatically, before smacking me on the arm.

I moved away so she could enter the room and watched as she turned around to call out to Niall, "By the way, Niall... I win!" She said smugly, before turning and walking further into the room.

Channing excused herself to the bathroom while I went back to the door and looked out in the hallway. Niall was still lying on his back, smiling up at the ceiling like a big dope. I started walking towards him and when he saw me approaching, he merely wiped the goofy grin of his face and replaced it with a friendly one.

I stood over him and he looked weary of me for a moment, "What are you... a turtle?" I asked with a laugh.

"Yeh, pretty much," he said as he shrugged his shoulders. I held out my hand to help him up and he accepted. "Come on you big ol' slug. God you're lazy." I commented as I tugged him to his feet. We started walking the short distance to the room.

"Thanks for the warning about the 'Tickle Queen'," he said as he held his fingers up in quotation marks. I couldn't help it, as soon as those words left his mouth, I burst out into laughter. He started laughing with me as we made it to the door. He opened it and motioned for me to enter first.

"Sorry, Niall!" I said, sounding completely unapologetic. He just shook his head and smiled at me. After we all entered the room and sat down on various items of furniture, Louis was the first to speak up, "So lads, what's on the agenda for tonight?" he asked to no one in particular.

"Ahem,  I'm not a 'Lad'," I said pointedly, crossing my arms over my chest. Channing reentered the room and took a seat on the arm of the chair that Zayn was sitting in. I heard her contagious laughter at my comment and glared at her. I looked for Niall and I spotted him sitting on the couch next to Liam, but when he heard Chan's laughter, he looked at her in one of those 'far off dreamy' kind of stares. Oh he's got it bad.

As if he sensed me smiling at him, he turned toward me, "Ok... lads and lassies?" he questioned, speaking for Lou.

"Ew.. please don't call me a lass. That's so weird. You foreign people have such strange terms," I said, not really meaning to sound offensive. Ok, maybe I was... oh well, they're pop sensations... they'll get over it.

"Jetta!" Channing said, giving me a horrified look. I guess she thought they'd be mad about my comment, but the boys were all just chuckling amongst themselves.

"Well how would you suggest we address everyone in the room?" Zayn questioned from beside Channing.

Chan immediately looked at him wide eyed, "Don't leave that decision up to her..." she said warningly.

I rolled my eyes and thought for a minute, "Pimps and Hoes," I said simply. Harry was taking a drink from a beer at the time and snorted loudly as soon as I spoke, and then started coughing. Apparently it went down the wrong pipe because Lou was standing next to him, slapping his back probably a little harder than was necessary.

After Harry composed himself, he looked up at me with watery eyes and a smile, "That's classy," he commented with a smirk.

I gave him a look of indifference, "Well, that little display was pretty smooth. No wonder you're such a lady killer," I said with a wink.

Everyone else started chuckling, even Harry as he shrugged his shoulders, "So who are the pimps and who are the hoes?" he asked, apparently ready and quite willing to accept his new title.

"Isn't it obvious?" I questioned to the room of people giving them a 'duh' look.

Channing spoke up, "Yeah, I think it's pretty obvious, Jet," she laughed.

I smiled knowingly at her before looking back towards everyone else, "Well, obviously Channing and I are just a couple pimpettes... Wouldn't you say so?" I asked the group.

They all seemed to roll their eyes at once as Channing spoke next, "So I guess that makes you guys our hoes," she said nonchalantly, as if there was no other option.

This is why she was my best friend.

Harry was about to protest but I pointed my finger at him, "Don't you even object!" I hollered at him.

However it wasn't Harry that protested, in fact it was Niall, "Hey! I'm not a hoe!" he yelled as his eyes narrowed at me then at Channing.

Chan and I were both just bent over laughing and holding our stomachs, I stood up and looked at each of them closely, "Ok, here's how we'll decide this. I want each of you to look me in the eye and tell me since you've become 'pop stars' you haven't used your fame to bag an easy lay," I said with my arms crossed over my chest.

I barely looked at Harry for a millisecond before seeing a smug smile form on his lips, I rolled my eyes and pointed at him again, "Hoe," and moved on to Zayn. He merely started whistling and looked up at the ceiling as if it were the most interesting thing on the planet, "Hoe!" I shouted out again.

My eyes traveled to Louis, who was just giving me a sheepish grin, and even felt the need to speak up, "Well... there was a little break between Hannah and Eleanor," he said as he shrugged his shoulders.

I put my hand up to stop him from continuing, "Ugh... Louis, I don't need details... Hoe!" I said again and took my eyes over to Liam. His sad little puppy dog face almost made me feel bad for a second, "Well, if you would have asked me this LAST September, I would have definitely qualified for the 'pimp'' title," he said as he scratched the back of his neck. I felt a little guilty for making him think about his break up with Danielle, but he had to face the facts. I walked over to him and sat down lightly on his knee and slung my arm over his shoulder, "Liam... I'm sorry, but that makes you a HOE," his puppy dog face actually broke out into a smile, "Yeah... it is what it is," he said, making me laugh. I pinched his cheek as my eyes slowly rolled over to Niall.

Obviously he was the cute little innocent snowflake of the bunch, but I don't even want to hear that he has never bagged a chick because of his superstar status. If he hasn't then he's either gay or practicing for priesthood.

"Niall....?" I asked slowly, waiting for my answer. I felt a little flutter of guilt sink in my tummy as I saw him glance at Channing from the corner of his eye, he obviously didn't want her to think badly of him. AWEE... Niall... stahp.

He cleared his throat, "Does it even mattah?" he asked me seriously, with a blush on his cheeks.

"Niall, I promise you. Neither Channing nor I will think any less of you, but this is vital information we need to know, so that we can classify you properly," I said trying to sound as posh and formal as possible.

Channing snorted from across the room, and quickly covered her mouth, trying to compose her face. I smiled at her, and I wouldn't be pushing this if I didn't know her so well. She honestly is the one who insists that Niall is just too "fucking sexy" to never have flings with groupies. Seriously, it's weird, as I studied her, she looked like she was eager for his answer, sitting on the edge of her seat.

"Oi, just tell them Niall. I don't know why you try to look like a saint..." Harry voiced from the floor, where he was sitting by Louis.

"Would yah rather I accept the title of a 'man whore', Harreh?" he asked him with a nervous smirk.

"That depends..." We all turned our heads to look at Channing as she spoke from across the room. She slowly stood up and walked over to where Niall was sitting, "Are you a man-whore, Niall?" she asked sickeningly sweet.

"No!" Niall immediately denied it, standing quickly so that he was face to face with Channing. She smirked a little as she looked him in the eye, "But there's been at least one...?" she lead him with the next question.

He pursed his lips together for a moment before nodding his head once and his cheeks turned extremely rosy.

To Niall's confusion, a big smile broke across Channing's face and she took her pointer finger and poked him on the nose, "That makes you... a HOE!" she sing-songed, while all the rest of us laughed.

The serious expression never left Niall's face, "You aren't mad?" he asked her, curiously.

Channing almost seemed taken aback by his question, "Why would I be mad?" she asked as her eyes softened, "We all have a past, you know." She said as she absentmindedly tugged at the bracelets on her wrist. I watched Nialll's eyes travel down, noticing her nervous habit. He quickly looked back up at her, "I suppose yer right," he said with a shrug.

I was still sitting on Liam, and that's when I realized that his bony knee was making my butt go numb. I stood up and dragged him into the kitchen, whining for him to make me some grilled cheese.

Harry followed behind me as he voiced, "Hey wait, this doesn't make sense... if we are the ones 'bagging chicks' as you so eloquently phrased it," he said smirking, "then why aren't we considered the pimps?" he questioned.

I turned away from Liam and set my sights on Harry, "You are the hoes. You're argument is invalid." I said before I quickly dismissed him and hurried back over to where Liam was looking through the room service menu.

I looked over my shoulder once more to meet Harry's gaze; he had a smug look on his face, while he pointed to himself and motioned to his face and mouthed "PIMP."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes again, but couldn't help but to find my eyes sneaking peeks at him from across the room as he was laughing with Zayn and Louis. Damn that cheeky boy... and damn those dimples.

**Channing's P.O.V**

Niall seemed so nervous as he revealed that he may have had a few one night stands. I honestly wasn't upset by this, but it was sweet that he didn't seem to want to hurt my feelings by talking about it.

He caught my eye again, "You aren't mad?" he asked nervously.

I was a little thrown off by the question, but quickly got control over my emotions, "We all have a past, you know," I said softly, so that the whole room wouldn't hear our conversation as I subtly tugged at my bracelets. His eyes traveled down then back up to hold my gaze, "I suppose yer right," he said with a slight smile as he shrugged.

I noticed Jetta was dragging Liam into the kitchen, followed by Harry; while the other boys were laying on the floor talking about some stupid football game. I grabbed Niall's hand and walked him toward the balcony. He opened the sliding door for me, and we stepped outside into the warm breezy night. I looked down at all of the cars and small buildings... the city was always so pretty at night.

We were standing in silence for a few minutes before I spoke, "Niall, do you judge me for my past?" I asked him simply, my own voice sounding far away.

He immediately stepped closer to me, "No, 'course not," he said as he grabbed my chin with his fingers and gently turned my face upwards to meet his eyes.

"I would never judge you for anything," he said staring at me intensely, as he grabbed a hold of my hands and cupped my wrists gently.

I smirked slightly at him, "Well, don't be so quick to think that I would judge you," I said as I admired the city lights reflecting in his clear eyes.

"I mean look at you... you're way too hot to be as 'pure of a snowflake' as everyone insists..." I trailed off as I stuck my tongue out playfully.

Before he could reply, I sprang forward, kissing his cheek and running back into the room.

**Niall's P.O.V**

I felt as if I were in a trance as I looked at Channing while we were standing on the balcony. Her hair was dancing around in the wind, and that intoxicating scent of her shampoo was hitting me full force.

I don't really know why I was so freaked out about telling Channing about some of my more... shameful moments. I didn't really think that she would judge me... but I guess I just didn't want to give her any reason to think less of me. She was actually really cool about it, and for that I was pretty amazed. Some girls get jealous and ask tons a questions, but she just wanted me to admit that my record wasn't as clean as people think, she didn't even ask for an exact number... not that that number is very high... but still.

She grabbed a few strands of her flying hair and tucked it behind her ear as she spoke, "I mean look at you... you're way too hot to be as 'pure of a snowflake' as everyone insists," she said with a cheeky little grin.Before I could even come up with a reply, she surprised me with a kiss on the cheek and fled the balcony. I smiled as I stared down at the city below.

This random, big city that was in the middle of the United States. How did I even get here? How could one decision to try out for a talent show... bring me to this? Bring me to her? I shuddered slightly as my mind started asking questions, 'What if I never went?' 'What if Katy said NO?' There were so many factors that had contributed to our success, and it was just really mind blowing anytime I tried to sit down and think about it. _'What if Channing never came to that signing?' What if I never found her on Twitter?'_ I just shook my head for a few seconds to clear my thoughts. I don't know how I got here... I don't know why... but for the first time in a long time, I knew I didn't feel as out of place as I usually felt. I felt like I was exactly where I was supposed be, regardless of past decisions, I felt like I ended up here for a reason... and that reason was Channing.


	10. Olive You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall discovers Channing's love for olives, he also learns the story of her father's suicide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Niall sings to Channing at the end is called Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade <3

**Channing's P.O.V**

After escaping back into the hotel room I turned too look over my shoulder and saw Niall smiling softly down at the city. The simplest things he did made my heart race. Like right now, he's just staring at the city lights and my hearts bouncing around my chest going on and on about how cute he is. Stop!

Before I could turn back around to see where I was going I found myself crashing into a solid wall of muscle. At least that's what it felt like. I peeked up to meet none other than Liam's sparkling brown eyes. He smiled at me, "Sorry, Love... I was just coming to tell you and Nialler that we ordered some food," he said as he steadied my shoulders and I peeled myself awkwardly off of his chest.

I swiped my hair out of my face and was about to reply, but then I heard Jetta yelling from the kitchen, "Channny! I got you some ollllives!" she sang in a teasing voice.

I looked at Laim again with a sly smile, "'Scuse me..." I said as I ran around him and hauled ass into the kitchen.

Zayn looked up and noticed my excited state, "You're this excited... over olives?" he asked me with a raised brow.

I crossed my arms over my chest and narrowed my eyes, "Um... yeah. Problem?" I slid in between Zayn and Jetta and jumped onto the counter. I grabbed the jar of black olives and dumped them into a plastic bowl that I found in one of the cabinets. After I scooped a few up and shoved them into my mouth, I looked up to see four pairs of eyes staring at me. Luckily Niall wasn't in the room yet to see my embarrassing display. Jetta noticed that the boys were all staring at me and she spoke on my behalf, "Yeah... Channing eats olives like candy. Don't try to understand it, guys..." she said dismissively as she cracked open a can of Pepsi and ripped her grilled cheese apart.

I shrugged my shoulders and popped a few more olives into my mouth as Niall finally waltzed in. It was getting pretty cramped in here, considering there were seven grown people squished into a little sliver of a kitchen.

Louis finally unleashed his opinion, "Channing... that's a little gross," he said as he stole one of Jetta's sandwich halves and took a huge bite out of it while she wasn't looking. Heh... big mistake Louis.

"Aye, what's gross?" Niall asked, as he looked around to everyone.

"Oh nothing... Channing just apparently eats olives like candy," Harry said in his slow drawl as he grabbed another beer out of the fridge. I still didn't understand how they were even able to get their hands on alcohol in the U.S... I mean Louis wouldn't be twenty-one until December. Before I could dwell on it any further I became distracted as I saw Niall heading my way.

He squeezed in between everyone to come stand in front of me as he helped himself to a few of my olives. In order to make room for him I opened my legs slightly so that he could lean his back against the counter. A small smile traced his lips as I did this but he didn't complain as he turned around to face everyone else, resting his elbows gently on my thighs. I blushed at the contact, but didn't push him away.

"What's wrong with olives?" he asked everyone... well, everyone besides Jetta and Louis because as soon as she realized he took a big ass bite of her grilled cheese she chased him out of the kitchen. I could still hear the commotion from the living room. Niall grabbed a few more olives and popped them into his mouth.

"Nothing, I just prefer to eat mine on pizza. Not with a spoon like a bowl of cereal," Zayn said as he looked at me pointedly. I had indeed just reached for a plastic spoon and was about to insert a truckload of olives into my mouth. I'm sorry, but they're delicious.

Niall turned slightly to watch me as I thrust the spoon into my mouth and chewed slowly. He tried to hide his smile as he spoke, "Ehh... yeah, ok... Chan, I don't think I can compete with that."

I shrugged my shoulders and pulled my olives farther out of his reach, "Good! More for me," I said trying to look smug, "I'm sorry that my tongue's palette is so much more sophisticated then all of yours," I said under my breath to the group of boys as I ate another spoonful.

They chuckled lightly as most of them left the room carrying their various beverages and snacks with them. I still noticed the presence of one boy though, mostly because I could feel the weight of his elbows on my thighs and the heat of his eyes burning a hole in the side of my head.

"Yesss?" I said as I slowly turned my head to look at him.

"Ya really like olives don't yeh?" he commented.

"Obviously," I said with a laugh as I put my hand over my mouth because it was full of the little black spheres of deliciousness.

"There a reason bahind that?" he asked me softly.

I stiffened slightly at his implication, but quickly collected myself, just shrugging my shoulders, "Uh... just always liked them," I said nonchalantly.

He studied me for a second, before a sparkle lit up in his eye, "Hey! I'm gonna call yeh Olive!" he said with a big smile on his face.

My eyes shot back up to meet his, and I immediately felt goosebumps taking over my arms and legs, as well as a tightness in my throat. Niall immediately noticed  my uncomfortable demeanor, "Hey, what's wrong? I don't have tah call yeh that! I was just kiddin'" he tried to back peddle to take back the nickname, but it was too late because he'd already said it, and so only one person's memory was weighing on my mind. Someone I hadn't thought of in a while. Someone I hardly knew but would always love and miss dearly.

"Chan, what's wrong! What did I say?" Niall asked me frantically as he turned his body around, still in between my legs. He had his palms on the counter top on either side of my hips, staring up at me with wide eyes as I tried to reign in my emotions. God, how was Niall not sick of me yet? He probably felt like he had to walk on egg shells around me.

I sniffled slightly, but was pretty proud of myself because somehow I managed to pull back the tears that had been threatening to fall.

"No, it's OK Niall... I'm sorry, I'm such a mess, " I said as I placed my bowl of olives on the counter and rubbed my hands over my face. Niall waited patiently as I calmed myself down and after a few minutes I braved a look at him from between my fingers.

"Yeh can tell me, Channing. I want to know... I want tah help..." Niall trailed off, his voice full of overwhelming sincerity.

I let out a soft sigh as I played with one of the rips that was on the thigh of my skinny jeans.

"It's my dad..." I said as my voice broke slightly, but I held strong and didn't let myself fall to pieces, "He uh... he used to call me Olive... before... he... y'know," I trailed off softly, still not meeting his eyes.

Niall didn't speak right away, it's like he was letting the pain from my past soak into him, as if he were trying to feel what I was feeling. He took his fingers to my chin, nudging my head up, "I'm sorry Channing... do you want to talk about it? I promise not to call you that again," he said sympathetically.

As soon as he said that I almost argued, and that's when I realized that I didn't mind it. I honestly didn't mind if Niall would call me that. In fact, I actually wanted him to. I had so few reminders of my father... although I was upset at first, as the thought of it sank into my bones, I understood that I got upset because of the grief of the unexpected reminder of my dad, not because I hated the nickname.

"No... Niall, actually I don't mind it. I-- I like it, " I mumbled, and wasn't even sure if he heard me, "I was just taken by surprise by his memory when you first said it... I always felt safe with my dad. So sometimes it hurts to think about those times when I used to be happy and actually safe... I-- I miss it." I finished softly

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked me again. His eyes softened as they studied me.

Normally, I try not to burden people. I try to keep to myself... but as his captivating eyes seemed to get bigger and brighter waiting for my answer, I felt like my walls were falling down. He was kicking them down, and he didn't even know it. Why was I trying so hard to shut him out? I was holding onto this pain, this hurt so tightly; refusing to share it with anyone. Jetta didn't even know everything that happened with my dad.  In a way, I wanted to keep the memory of my father all to myself. At least that's how I felt before this charming, Irish leprechaun barged into my heart... and into my physical world. Niall was no longer a figment of my imagination that only existed in my mind, and on my letters. As much as I thought I knew him before actually meeting him, I was surprised constantly about how little I actually did know. He had so many sides, and I felt like all I wanted to do was find out every little insignificant thing about him. This made me realize that is was a mutual feeling we shared, but we were just afraid to push the other to open up first.

Niall was still waiting patiently for my reply, I closed my eyes to collect myself, "My dad was... he was my best friend," I began speaking, and opened my eyes to find his orbs studying mine as I continued, "Every little girl has a special relationship with her father, and I was no exception. He read to me every night, he taught me to tie my shoes, he would take me fishing and taught me not to be afraid of baiting the hook and getting worm guts on my hands," I said with a laugh as I remembered my dad. Niall chuckled softly with me, "That's an important thing fer a girl tah learn... it's okay tah get yer hands dirty," he commented.

I nodded at Niall as I continued stringing memories from the depths of my mind and unleashing them into the atmosphere. Memories I'd promised myself I was never going to subject myself to again. I eagerly continued speaking, "He was very handsome, my mom says I got my eyes from him. I know a lot of people think they're weird or ugly, but it's my favorite feature because when I look in the mirror, I feel like I'm looking at a piece of my father--"

I was cut off when Niall immediately cupped my cheek with his hand so that I would look down at him, "Olive..." he said with a wink, "Yer eyes ARE beautiful. They're my favorite feature of yours as well..." he trailed off while giving me a look that said 'stop putting yourself down.'

A smile tugged at the corner of my mouth, "Thank you," I said shyly as I carried on with tales of my father, "He had a stressful job, and I'm pretty sure he got caught up with some bad people, because toward the end, he would be drunk a lot. It would scare me, because when he was drunk, he wasn't my father. He wasn't the man who sang me lullabies, or put band aids on my skinned knees; he wasn't the man who took me trick-r-treating, or the man who promised to always be there for me... to keep me safe. He was a stranger..." As I spoke, a single tear trailed down my cheek, and as I felt Niall's warm thumb swipe it away, it gave me a new strength to continue.

**Niall' P.O.V**

I listened intently as Channing shared some of her happier memories she held of her father with me, and as I spied a lone tear escape down her cheek, I quickly swept it away without a second thought. I couldn't stand to see tears on her face.

"... He was like a stranger..." she whispered so softly, I almost thought I imagined it. I could tell that her inner turmoil was just dying to rip her apart, but she held her self together as she continued on, "I had just started Kindergarten. I was so excited, because the night before my dad hadn't been drinking, so he was actually helping me practicing writing my name. He always said that he was the best to help since it was his middle name, so he was a pro at writing it. Being the silly little five year old I was, I thought it was the coolest thing being named after my dad," she said with a laugh as she shook her head.

I smiled as well, happy to learn something new about her. I always wondered where she'd gotten her name from, since I'd never actually known any woman who went by 'Channing.' I never questioned it though, because it suited her so well.

I watched as the smile slipped from her face, "We were actually sharing a bowl of olives... since apparently I inherited my love for them from him. We were just goofing around and then he took my hand and looked at me seriously, and gave me a hug as he whispered into my hair, "Olive, remember I'll always be here. Even when you can no longer see me," as she spoke her voice broke slightly and I watched as her water-filled eyes unleashed the tears that had been building up. I didn't wipe them away this time though, she needed to get this out. She needed to let this go. I just thought of every one of those tears as a little less grief and loss she would feel.

"Ss-- So that night, he read me a story and sang me a song... and then I just fell asleep in my delusional little perfect world... as my dad sat in our garage with the door closed and the car running." As she finished her sentence, a heart wrenching sob broke through her lips as she wrapped her arms around herself. She seemed so used to keeping herself together. I heard the shuffling of feet and saw the other lads peeking into the kitchen not sure if they should approach. I shook my head and waved them away as I collected Channing from the counter. I held her to me as I walked us to my room so she could have some privacy. 

I placed her gently on the bed and watched as she curled up into the fetal position, burying her face in my pillow as she cried her eyes out. I looked on helplessly as this broken girl fell apart right in front of me. I had no idea what to do for her, so I did the only thing I thought might help. I crawled onto the bed so that I was laying next to her, spooning her from behind. I nestled my face so that it was resting against the back of her neck, and I wrapped my arms around her. My lips were brushing her ear as I whispered soft, comforting words. Channing was still gasping for breath as I grabbed for her hand and intertwined our fingers. After a few minutes, I felt like simple words weren't going to be enough to calm her down so I started to sing softly to her, it was a song I'd only learned recently;

_"The best thing 'bout tonight's that we're not fighting_   
_Could it be that we have been this way before?_   
_I know you don't think that I am trying_   
_I know you're wearing thin down to the core_  
 _But hold your breath_   
_Because tonight will be the night_   
_That I will fall for you over again_   
_Don't make me change my mind  
_ _Or I won't live to see another day_ _I swear it's true_   
_Because a girl like you is impossible to find_ _You're impossible to find'_

As soon as I started singing, she squeezed my hand tightly, which encouraged me to continue;

_"This is not what I intended_   
_I always swore to you I'd never fall apart_   
_You always thought that I was stronger_   
_I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start_  
 _Oh, but hold your breath_   
_Because tonight will be the night_   
_That I will fall for you over again_   
_Don't make me change my mind  
_ _Or I won't live to see another day_ _I swear it's true_   
_Because a girl like you is impossible to find_   
_It's impossible"_

I started feeling her shoulders relax and her sobs had quieted down to mere hitches in her breathing as she tried to catch her breath. I continued whispering the song into her ear,

_"So breathe in so deep_   
_Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep_   
_And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap_   
_And remember me tonight when you're asleep_  
 _Because tonight will be the night_   
_That I will fall for you over again_   
_Don't make me change my mind!_  
 _Or I won't live to see another day_ _I swear it's true_ __  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find"  
  
She slowly rolled over to face me so I stopped singing for a second to take in her red, puffy eyes. I looked down and watched her lips as she spoke, "Please keep singing?" she asked, hoarsely. I nodded and continued for her;

_"Tonight will be the night_   
_That I will fall for you over again_   
_Don't make me change my mind_  
 _Or I won't live to see another day_ _I  
swear it's true_   
_Because a girl like you is impossible to find_   
_You're impossible to find"_

As I finished the last line, I smiled down at her. I patiently waited for her to speak first. We were laying face to face, chest to chest, with my arms wrapped around her waist and her hands bunching up my shirt across my chest, as she held on to it for dear life. The position we were in would normally be encouraging me to have not so proper thoughts, but at that moment, I didn't care about any of that. I just looked down at her, hoping that she had gotten some of that weight off her shoulders.

"I'm so sorry Niall. I'm so sorry," she began rambling out apologies. I quickly covered her mouth and locked my eyes with hers as I shook my head, "Olly, don't apologize fer crying. It's OK. You're OK," I whispered to her as she gave me a grateful smile and cuddled into me, resting her face against my chest while I lay my cheek against the top of her head.

Although I wasn't expecting her to, in a sturdy voice she continued talking about her father, "I remember being woken up by sirens. I was snatched out of my bed and hauled off to a hospital to make sure I didn't have carbon monoxide poisoning, both my mother and I were. Apparently when people decide to do that in the garage, the fumes can leak into the home. I doubt my father realized that," she said in a rather monotone voice. Her voice was even raspier than normal because of her crying, and it was giving me chills as she spoke against my chest.

"My mother found the suicide note a few days later. Of course, I was five... I didn't understand what happened to him at the time... but when I was eleven years old I found that note in my mother's night stand. That was probably one of the worst days of my life... just reading that letter... alone," she said, her voice sounding scratchy and thick with emotion.

I kissed her forehead as she continued to empty the rest of her painful secrets into my waiting arms, "The letter was pretty much addressed to my mother, saying how sorry he was... but at the very bottom he wrote me a little blurb. He left me one paragraph... thirteen sentences... 207 words. Those words burned a hole into my brain and into my heart and I'll never be able to forget them," she whispered weakly.

"What did he say?" I asked, curiously. I expected her to start speaking, but rather she pulled a locket out from under  her shirt... a locket I had never noticed before. I watched her as she carefully popped the latch and swung the heart-shaped locket open. Inside was a tiny piece of crumbled paper that looked like it had been folded two or three time to make it fit. Channing carefully unwrapped the fragile paper, it looked rather worn, as if she had opened it and closed it constantly throughout the years. She slowly handed the note to me, it was less than a half sheet of paper, she must have torn it off of the original suicide note.

I opened my hand and she dropped the crumbled paper into my palm. Almost hesitantly, I brought the paper up to my face so that I could read the permanent words written in fading ink;

_Olive,_ _I don't expect you to ever forgive me for leaving you, it's one of the hardest and most selfish things I've ever done. You're so free, happy and bright... and I hope to God that you never lose that beautiful spirit, even when I'm no longer here. Never lose that spark, Channing... never lose the will to fight. You're stronger than I will ever be, and I want you to always remember that. No matter what kind of trials await you in life, I want you to promise me that you will never let them break you. It won't be easy, it will be hard, but I know that you will do great things. I'll always be with you... in your heart and in your memories. I'll always watch over you, and although I may not be able to stop everything bad from happening to you, I will promise you something. You always used to ask me to be your prince charming, and although I cannot do that sweetie, I will find him. I'll find your other half, and I will lead him to you. You'll never be alone. You are my heart Channing, you are my world. Olive you. -Daddy_

I felt like my own eyes were growing misty as I finished the letter.

Her breath hitched when she saw my expression, "I've never shown that to anyone. Not even Jetta," she confessed as she squeezed her eyes shut... "Niall, why wasn't I enough to keep him here? Why wasn't I good enough for him to stay?" she whispered in such a heart-breaking voice, I literally felt like my heart was cracking apart.

I felt a little flip in my stomach, this is so huge, and she's never shared it with anyone? She's carried it on her shoulders alone? My mind traveled back to some of her previous letters where she explained she was cowering in her bathroom, absolutely terrified, as she wished for someone, anyone to help her... to hold her. Instead of getting that warm reassurance, she was just met with the cold tile floor as she wrote letters to me; and even though there was nothing I could do about the past, I couldn't help but feel awful.

I glanced down at Channing and squeezed her to me, holding her as close as I could without physically hurting her, "Channing, don't eveh sey that. He was the weak one, an' there was nuthin you could have done." I said as I locked my eyes on hers, "Sometimes tha one's that we love do terrible things tah us... but we have tah move on. We have to forgive the one's we love, and we have to let go of the resentment and regret we hold fer them. If not fer them, then fer yourself. Sometimes we may feel hopeless, like tha world is cavin' in on yeh. Sometimes things get hard, and we just don't wanta exist anymore; we wanta hide in that place behtween life an' death, just itchin' to end it once an' fer all. It's okay tah feel that way..." I grasped her chin gently to make her look at me, "But we have tah remember to think of the ones WE LOVE... and the ones who LOVE US. Don' ever think he left because you weren't good enough, Chan." I finished as I hugged her close to me again.

Channing was just looking at me with wide eyes as I made my speech... I don't know where all of that depth came from, but it just came pouring out of me. She looked a little awestruck for a moment, and then she surprised me as she placed her soft hands against my cheeks and brought her lips to mine. Our lips innocently touched for mere seconds, but it was long enough for my insides turn to mush and leave me wanting more.

Suddenly the door flew open and Jetta was standing there with her hand on her hip as she looked at us with her eyebrow raised, "Oh my God guys... stop having sex. Get your asses out here... we're gonna play twister!" she cheered as she ran back out of the room yelling for Harry to set up the game. Where the hell did we get Twister?

After Jetta left and we laughed about her ridiculous accusations again we didn't get up right away; I figured someone would come back in to harass us and we could get up then, so I just pulled Channing close and enjoyed the moment.

We smiled at each other as I felt a warm feeling just envelop the two of us. As if a warm blanket was being draped over us, and I felt chills run up and down my arms. It didn't seem to phase Channing though because she just snuggled closer into me and sighed. As I lay there with my face in her hair and my arms wrapped around her, my mind once again wandered the dangerous minefield of trying to figure out how I got here in the first place. One little decision, or change in the time line could have prevented our meeting from ever happening. As I delved further into my scattered thoughts, a new one sprung up at me after reading that letter from her father: Maybe he did lead me to her... _maybe he kept his promise after all._


	11. Spin the Harry 2.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang plays a fun twister game where the dots are replaced by the boys faces ;)   
> Seriously someone needs to make this game cus I wanna play it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quite a few P.O.V changes in this one... sorry.

**Jetta P.O.V**

I was only somewhat listening to the boys as they questioned Channing about her olive obsession before I spoke up, "Yeah... Channing eats olives like candy... Don't try to understand her twisted mind," I said with a laugh as I began opening cabinets looking for napkins. After a few moments of tedious searching, I finally found some in the silverware drawer; after doing a mini fist pump into the air I grabbed a handful. What can I say? I'm a pretty messy eater.

I turned around feeling excited and ready to devour my grilled cheese when I suddenly spied a huge bite mark on one of my sandwich halves. I immediately felt the steam coming out of my ears as I dragged my eyes up to the four fat asses who were close enough in range to have committed the crime. Three of the boys seemed to be focused still on Channing and her olives, but there was one who was just acting a little too cool, calm and collected as he crossed his arms, tapped his foot and began whistling.

"Louis!!!" I yelled accusingly. He quickly turned toward me, feigning confusion, but his act didn't last for long as I saw a smug grin playing at his lips and a mischievous sparkle in his pretty blue eyes.

"Yes, Jetta? Did you need something?" He asked trying to sound concerned. I wasn't buying his act for a second, not to mention I could still see him subtly trying to chew! As well as a few crumbs on his dark turtleneck. That little British bitch!

I slowly put my plate down, staring longingly at my sandwich for a second before I turned back to face him, "You have five seconds to run," I said, my voice full of malice. His eyes grew larger as he saw me raise my hand up to begin ticking off the numbers, "One... Two..." He actually spun around and sprinted away so I went ahead and skipped ahead in my counting, "... Five!" I yelled out and was immediately met with a frantic scream back, "Hey! That's not fair!" Lou yelled at me as I chased him into the living room, skidding to a stop in front of the couch that he was cowering behind, like a little girl I might add.

"Well, LEWIS... Sometimes life ain't fair!" I hissed back at him, purposely stressing the fact that I'd called him 'Lewis'.

His eyes then narrowed at me, "Ha ha.... Real funny," he replied trying to hide the fear in his eyes as I slowly approached the couch. He was watching me, trying to read which way I was going to go but I surprised him when I just ran straight forward and sprang over the small love seat.

His girly high pitched scream was instantly cut short as I tackled him to the ground, landing quite gracefully onto his unflexed stomach. He groaned loudly as my weight settled on top of him, he tried rolling over to throw me off, but I put my hands on his shoulders to keep myself in place.

He groaned again in an overly exaggerated, hoarse voice, "Can't... Breathe... Need..... Air!" Before coughing and sputtering a few times. Apparently my 130 lb frame was crushing the life out of him. Awe. What a drama queen. I mean I know I'm not a twig. But he probably outweighed me. Rude.

"Oh shut it. You stole my food. You deserve to die," I said simply as I stared down at his stupidly pretty eyes and girly lashes. Louis was seriously one of the prettiest people on the planet. No really, I can't even explain it... But it's like his perfect bone structure, his high cheek bones, his perfect little teeth... He was not just a handsome boy... He was also prettier than most women. I think that's quite an accomplishment. Ugh my Louis feels were hitting me hard at the moment, and I really needed to get a handle on it.

"Sheesh, you're worse than Nialler!" He commented, pulling me out of my fangirl moment. I shook my head to refocus on the situation at hand, "Yeah... Maybe you'll remember that next time!" I spoke slowly through my clenched teeth. It was then that I realized I had lowered my face so that I was mere inches away from his, my eyes focused on his lips as I watched them form into a smirk. I swear that damn smirk was permanently etched onto his perfect lips... oh shit, there I go... fangirling again.

 

**Louis P.O.V**

Jetta pinned me to the floor and I watched her as she absentmindedly drew closer to my face, whispering menacingly, "Maybe you'll remember that next time," she stopped so that our noses were a few inches apart. It was then that I noticed the birthmark she had over her left eyebrow, as well as the little golden flecks that were scattered within her blueish-green eyes. As I studied her for a moment I noticed the fire in her eyes; I felt a little guilt gathering in the pit of my stomach because I knew she had a boyfriend and I had Eleanor... But I really liked this harmless flirting we were doing. Well, harmless for now.

Suddenly Harry's baby face peeked at us from over the couch, "Everything OK back here? Got a little too quiet... Just making sure you didn't kill my boobear," he said with a cheeky grin, winking at me. Jetta broke eye contact with me to look over her shoulder, "I was gettin' to it... But I can't leave you behind as a witness... So I guess... " she turned her head to face me again, "You been touched by an Angel, gurrrl," she said the last sentence sounding really ghetto, like one of the clover cheerleaders in Bring It On.

I burst out laughing, before immediately stopping, "Hey! Who are you calling a girl?" I asked as I hoisted myself up a little, making her fall backwards so that she was laying against my legs, and flexed my biceps, for her to admire of course.

Jet rolled her eyes at me and scoffed, "Oh, sorry... Lewis!" she replied, smiling at the fact that saying my name wrong always ruffled my feathers; the funny thing though, was that I didn't mind it when she said it. The American accent made it even more appealing.

"That's the only thing I'm willing to call you, I mean, it's either that or 'Wee Little Poopy Pants'... your choice," she said with a wink as she did an awkward backwards crab walk to get off of my legs. Not that I minded her being there.

"Hey!" Harry exclaimed, still watching us from over the couch, like the creeper he was, "Why is he the only one who gets a nickname?" He whined to Jetta, looking her up and down as she got to her feet. Jetta brushed herself off before setting her sights on Harry, with a tight smile on her face.

"Awe, do you feel left out, Harold?" She asked sweetly.

"Actually, she didn't give me a nickname, she's merely insisting that she be allowed to say my name incorrectly," I pointed out as I sent a smile to Jetta.

"We can always go with 'Wee Little Poopy Pants..." she said in a sing-song voice. I rolled my eyes at her as I tried to hold back my smile. This girl may be even more immature than I am. Nothing wrong with that though!

"Yeah, yeah... 'Lewis' is just great," I said as I made finger quotations around 'Lewis'.

I was met with a hand in my face as she thrust her arm towards me before saying, "Quiet irrelevant person! I'm thinking!"

Harry started laughing at her display, while I took it upon myself to bite at her hand; unfortunately she pulled away before I could sink my teeth into it. Then she smacked me on the back of my head... violent!

"Harry I've got the perfect nickname for you," she cooed as she continued to swat at me since I was being annoying and poking her cheek.

Harry nodded his head excitedly, "I'm gonna call you Princess Kitty Paws!" She said with excitement as she jumped and clapped her hands together. I snorted loudly as I saw Harry's smile morph into a grimace. I heard Liam and Zayn laughing loudly from the armchairs that were seated near the television. They were stuffing their faces with crisps from the looks of it, I glanced around looking for Niall and Channing but they weren't present. I assumed they were still in the kitchen feeding each other olives or something. Don't even get me started on the chemistry between those two... I still found it odd and slightly disturbing.

My attention was brought back to Harry as I heard him dispute his new nickname," Ehh... OK, forget I said anything..." he said as he leaned forward, shook his head and did his hair flip thing. He was obviously trying to make a move on Jetta... but honestly he makes a move on anything with a pulse so I shouldn't really read too much into it... and it's not like I care. Right?

Liam spoke up from across the room, "No, keep it! I'm already quite fond of the name," he laughed as he winked at Jetta. I started laughing obnoxiously at the horrified look on Harry's face, "No!" He protested, turning away from Jetta and I, probably to glare at Liam.

I clapped Harry on the shoulder, "Hey mate, you're not Jimmy so stop protesting," I said as I gave him a very serious look. Honestly that joke never got old. Obviously Jetta agreed because she started giggling adorably, squeezing her eyes shut with her hand on her stomach. Harry gave me a sour look as I pinched his cheek and he grumbled under his breath.

I was slightly startled as Jetta swiftly jumped back over the couch, she was quite nimble, and stood on her tip toes in order to wrap her arm over his shoulders, "Come on, Princess Kitty Paws, let's go pick out a movie!" She said happily as she dragged a pouting Harry away over to the little pile of DVDs that were sitting next to the TV.

I shook my head and chuckled when Zayn also referred to Harry by the dreadful nickname. Yeah, Jetta can certainly call me ' _Lewis'_ if something as hellish as Princess Kitty Paws and as embarrassing as  _'Wee Little Poopy Pants'_ are the only other alternatives.

**Zayn's P.O.V**

As I grabbed my pack of crisps and followed Liam back into the living room, I quirked up an eyebrow when I saw Lou's feet from behind the couch, while Harry leaned over the couch laughing at whatever was going on. I chuckled softly as I plopped myself down in the armchair that was sitting next to the chair that Liam was already occupying.

I pretty much just focused on the television since a Family Guy marathon was playing, which was alright with me. I love this show, but I hope to God they never decide to make an episode featuring us. I can only imagine all of the golden material they could use,  just thinking about it was giving me chills.

Liam and I watched the show in silence, aside from an occasional laugh. I could still hear the banter taking place behind the sofa, and I think I could also hear whispering coming from the kitchen. I decided not to eavesdrop and refocused my attention back on the screen. When it came to a commercial break I looked back over my shoulder to see Jetta, who was still going toe-to-toe with "Lewis" and "Princess Kitty Paws". Apparently, Harry was a tad bit upset over his new nickname... What a shame. Oh well... beggars can't be choosers. Liam spoke up, taunting Harry by saying he liked the name while I tried not to choke on my crisps from laughing at the death glare Harry shot our way.

I became distracted again though as I thought I could hear crying and sniffling coming from the kitchen. There was a thick wall that closed off the room, so from where I was sitting, the only thing I could see was the fridge. Harry and Jetta were now sprawled out on the floor as they weeded through our tiny DVD collection. I glanced at Liam who also seemed to be looking in the direction of the kitchen, when he caught my eye, I mouthed, "Do you hear crying?" He gave me a short nod, and his face scrunched up in worry as I saw him look down towards Jetta, who was still talking happily to Harry.

"Ha-- I mean.... P.K.P," Liam said with a sly grin. Harry turned around and glared at him, "Why don't you and Jetta go search my luggage for some board games or something?" He asked, obviously trying to get Jet out of the room. Harry quickly caught on to our worried faces and dragged Jetta away to the other bedroom; hopefully he'd find something fun for us to do.

Louis slowly crept toward the kitchen opening, which encouraged Liam and I to stand up as well, and the three of us hesitantly approached the crying and whispering voices. As soon as I could poke my head around the corner, my heart clenched as my eyes found Channing crying and shaking while Niall held her and stroked her hair. A horrible sob broke through her throat and it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

I glanced at Louis and Liam and their facial expression looked similar to what mine felt like; worried and confused. We wanted to help but weren't sure if there was anything we could do. Niall either sensed us or heard when we entered because he turned to face us, quickly waving his hand away, telling us not to intrude. His demeanor was both worried and serious, but also determined. As if he was going to do anything in his power to make Channing feel OK again... To make her feel loved.

Niall collected Channing into his arms, pressing her tortured face against his chest as she wrapped her body around him. In all honesty, they looked like they fit each other perfectly; the way her head fell against the crook of his neck to the way one of his arms wrapped comfortably around her waist and the other fit smoothly behind the bend in her knees as he held her legs. He hurried past us toward his room, turning to give us a quick nod as he disappeared through the doorway, kicking the door shut.

The lads and I gave each other unsure glances, but we decided to respect his wishes and let him handle this alone. He was ready for this. He'd been waiting for this. A little smile tugged at the side of my mouth and a sense of pride radiated through me as I thought of how far Niall had come, in just a few days. He may be helping to fix Channing, but Chan was also helping him feel whole for once. Niall always said he felt like he was missing something in his life, and I felt thrilled for him as I realized she is what he was missing. I settled back in my chair and looked again to the closed door that hid a broken girl and a determined boy; and let a full fledged smile cross my face.

Niall was truly something special, he cared about people and always wanted to make everyone happy. Now, it was his turn to get some of that happiness back. He'll fix her, I don't doubt that; Channing may not be able to get back all of the broken pieces of her heart that she's lost over the years, but Niall will be more than willing to give pieces of his own to patch her up. I wasn't scared for him, or worried about his decisions like I usually was when it came to him and girls. No, I was proud of him for stepping up and helping someone he believed in. I wasn't just proud of my friend, I was proud of my brother.

 

**Harry's P.O.V**

After I finally was able to drag Jetta out of the living room, I quickly shoved her into the bedroom and instructed her to start looking. Liam had been giving me a look that read "get her out of here." So now I was back in Liam's room trying to find some games he'd been talking about. Honestly I didn't think he had any games; I had stupid games like Uno and Jenga but those were over in mine and Lou's hotel room. This was probably just supposed to be a distraction for Jetta.

I glanced up to see her nosing around Liam's closet, and gave up my useless search to sit on the bed and watch her look. I was actually looking forward to her reaction when she noticed me perving on her. What can I say? She's hot when she's mad.

She opened a few drawers, most of which were empty, and got down on her hands and knees in order to rifle through one of Li's duffel bags. I tried to keep my wandering eyes from landing on her bum, but they wouldn't listen and seemed to focus on it anyway. I wonder if she even remembers she's wearing a miniskirt?

Jetta was a very fit girl, they both were of course; but Jetta had more of that Barbie meets surfer girl kind of look... As in she looked natural but you could also tell she really likes to dress up as well. Her blond wavy hair was very long, reaching nearly to her mid-back and it was interlaced with reddish-brown highlights... Or I guess that would be considered lowlights? I don't really know, I'm no beautician. I would not classify her as just skinny, because she actually looked very muscular and in shape. As I studied her toned arms and strong calf muscles, I gathered that she could probably very easily kick my ass. For whatever reason I found that appealing. Don't ask me why.

She stood up then and stretched her arms over her head in order to feel around the top rack of the dark closet. Her shirt rose up as well giving me even more of a show and encouraging my perverted fantasies. As her shirt rose, she exposed the lower portion of her toned back and slim waist. As well as two back dimples that were peeking out at the bottom of her spine. Damn that Ed Sheeran for writing that song; now I always find myself looking for those "little things" when those were actually things I'd never paid much attention to before. Now I'm obsessed with those cute little indentations that for some reason girls seem to be insecure about; I'm not sure why though because I found them incredibly attractive. Hi. I'm Harry Styles, and you may be obsessed with the dimples in my cheeks, but I'm obsessed with the dimples in your back. How creepy of a chat up line would that be?

I accidentally chuckled about my creepiness and Jetta immediately stopped reaching for the duffel bag and turned around to give me an icy glare, I guess she thought I was laughing at her. Whoops. I stood up quickly as I covered for myself, "Here, I got it." She gave me a grateful smile as I handed her the bag. I couldn't help myself so I continued, "I find it important to always make time to help the vertically challenged," I said with a wink.

As expected she reached out and smacked the back of my head. Eh, I guess I deserved that one. I looked down at her once more as I heard her groan out in frustration, "Ughh! Is Liam on crack? I haven't found a single game back here," she said indignantly as she shoved the bag away from her. I watched her look up and do a double take, "Harry! There's one more bag! I need your disturbingly tall, gangly ass to get it for me," she ordered as she pointed and stuck out her tongue. I just stared at her for a minute, trying to glare, but fighting my facial expressions, because all my mouth wanted to do was smile. Why her insulting me is something that makes me smile, is something I'll never know.

I hadn't made a move for the bag yet so she smacked her hand gently against her forehead as if she remembered something, "Oh silly me! I mean Princess Kitty Paws!" She cooed as the smile slid off my face and was actually replaced with a real glare.

I groaned as I reached for the last duffel, "That is a terrible nickname," I whined as I handed her the bag so she could thoroughly search it. She lowered herself to the floor, sitting Indian style. I followed her lead and dropped down to lay on my stomach. I propped myself up on my elbows as I watched her do all the work.

"I disagree," she shot back while she took out multiple random items and set them on the floor before she continued, "Here's how I see it Harold... You walk around with your head in the clouds, while the majority of your fans would kiss the very ground you walk on. You're like a princess! Hell I could imagine you sitting on a plush sofa wearing a fuzzy robe while two fangirls cool you off by fanning you with giant leaves, as two more fangirls take turns feeding you grapes. I can also see another girl standing behind you, combing your curls the 100 required brush strokes, as yet another holds your glass of lemonade, bringing it to your lips every time you say 'sip,'" as soon as Jetta finished her ridiculous vision I burst out laughing. She smirked slightly and puffed her cheeks out as she continued digging.

"Now that... that would be the life," I said as I tried to get my laughter under control.

She then looked up and met my eyes as she held something in her hands, "That is where I got the 'princess' from," she said with a shrug as she looked down at the box in her hands with a big smile on her face.

"And the Kitty Paws?" I inquired further.

"Well, animal paws are cute... you're kinda cute... seemed like a pretty accurate comparison," she said nonchalantly.  I beamed at the fact that she called me cute, even though I could tell she REALLY didn't want to.

"And.... the Kitty?" I prompted, trying not to laugh.

She looked at me like I was an invalid as she replied, "Hazzy, come on. We all know your extensive history with... Pussies," she said flatly as she jumped to her feet ran out of the room.

I had yet to move as I rolled onto my back laughing loudly at her reasoning for incorporating "Kitty" into my nickname. I never even got to see what was on the box that little spitfire was holding.

 

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I dashed out of the bedroom as I heard Harry laughing loudly behind me, I smirked slightly at the sound of his contagious laugh as I ran into the living room, quickly seeking Liam out and jumping on his lap, "Liam! Where on earth did you get this?!" I asked him excitedly as he glanced down at the little treasure resting in my hands. His eyes quickly traveled back up to sparkle at mine as he spoke, "I think a fan made it actually. She gave it to me at the signing the other day," he informed me with a big grin.

Harry entered the room, and now that he composed himself, he reached for the game to take a look at it. His eyes immediately lit up as they grew wide with excitement, "No way!" He shouted loudly as I snatched the box back out of his hands to show Zayn and Louis, which reminded me I hadn't noticed Niall and Chan... Where the Hell were they?

Zayn and Louis were looking at the game in excitement now as I spied a closed door which I was assuming was Niall's and approached it. Liam tried to get my attention but I shooed him away as I barged right into the room without knocking. I saw them lying on the bed face to face; when I say face to face, I actually mean lips to lips because it was apparent I had interrupted an intimate moment as they pulled away from each other and looked at me. As I caught Channing's eye I noticed they were a little red and puffy, but they both seemed to be in good spirits at the moment so I didn't want to bring it up. I'd just have to ask her about it later.

"Oh my God you guys, stop having sex!" I yelled at them with a laugh. I swear, every time I catch them alone together, that's what I'm going to say. Just to embarrass Channing, mostly.

They just kind of stared at me as I grinned at them, bubbling with excitement, "Come on! We're gonna play Twister!" I said enthusiastically. I quickly fled the room, figuring they'd get their asses up eventually because I mean, who doesn't want to play Twister?

"Harry set it up!" I yelled to him as I came to a stop in the middle of the living room. Liam and Louis had pushed the couch back a little ways and Zayn was moving the coffee table out of the way while Harry unfolded the mat. This game was legit. This fan really put a lot of time into it.

After Harry finished laying the mat out and set the twister board down, I pulled him into the kitchen, "Do you have anything better than beer here?" I asked hopefully. I mean seriously, who wouldn't want to play a game of drunk Twister with One Direction?

Harry gave me a knowing look as he opened a cabinet to reveal their stash of hard liquor, "Take your pick, love," he said with a bright smile. My eyes traveled over the bottles and settled on grabbing three at random since I know nothing about alcohol. After taking two shots with Harry and feeling the warmth in my cheeks, I suddenly remembered I wouldn't be able to play twister while wearing a skirt.

"Shit! I need clothes! I can't play in a skirt!" I cried as Harry gave me an amused look. I sighed as I self consciously pulled at my short skirt.

"Well, I don't think any of the lads would mine..." he chirped teasingly, but I just answered him with a death glare.

He laughed at my expression before holding up his finger, "Hang on a sec, my room's across the hall, I'll go get you something," he offered sweetly.

I tousled his curls, "Thanks, P.K.P!" I cooed, but he was no longer smiling, so I quickly corrected myself, "I mean thanks, Hazzy!"

He smirked again at me as he walked out the door, but not before yelling casually over his shoulder, "Don't miss me too much, babe!" I rolled my eyes. I swear that boy puts the COCK in cocky.

**Channing's P.O.V**

Niall and I eventually dragged ourselves out of each other's warm embrace when Louis came in the room and jumped on top of us. I swear, these boys just don't believe in privacy. It didn't matter though... I was OK now. In fact, because of Niall, I felt better than I had in a very long time. I'd never felt so weightless. Although I was still extremely embarrassed of how emotional I became... I'm glad that it happened. I'm happy that I could share that moment with him. I actually felt like he did care, like all he wanted to do was make me feel better. To help me. I just wish that I could repay him... because so far, all I've done is act stupid and cry over olives. Honestly, what the hell does he see in this broken mess?

Niall offered me his hand and pulled me up off the bed. I smiled as he gave my fingers a tight squeeze before releasing them and ushering me out of the room. I noticed upon entering the living room that a lot of the furniture had been pushed toward the edges of the room, leaving a big open space in the middle, where a mat was spread out smoothly, just waiting for us. As I looked closer I realized that this wasn't just a normal twister game... this was by far the most awesome thing I'd ever seen in the history of my eyeballs.

Rather than the mat holding circles of various colors; it actually had a face of each of the boys in place of where each of those colorful dots would be. There were four rows, and each boy got a row to himself. I smiled at the various silly picture's they used for Niall's row for a moment, before glancing at the rows covered with multiple faces of Liam, Zayn and Louis. That's when I realized a certain curly haired fellow was missing.

"Oh my gosh, did they not include Harry?" I asked, almost getting upset. I hate when fans intentionally leave out one of the boys. I swear that's why our "fandom" suffered so much drama. Why can't people just love all of the boys? They're all perfect!

"No werries, we got Harreh cov'ed," Niall said as he handed me a piece of cardboard with a spinner attached to it. I started laughing as I looked at the top of the board where it read, "Spin the Harry 2.0" Attached to the spinner was a funny picture of Harry, so when a played flicked the spinner, Harry would "spin" around and land on one of the other boys. This was the coolest thing I've ever seen. I bet that girl could make a killing if she sold these. I mean Directioners will buy ANYTHING. Hell, they'd probably buy 1D toilet paper if it were available.

I smiled at the boys as I remembered those video diaries, I really missed them. However, considering my current situation, this is better than any damn video diary could ever be. The boys were goofing around with one another as I noticed Harry and Jetta walk in from the kitchen. I smiled at Jetta quickly, but had to do a double take when I realized she was no longer in her miniskirt and low cut tank top. She was now sporting a pair of grey sweatpants that were slung lowly on her hips and a Ramones t-shirt. Where the hell did she get those clothes?

I eyed her wearily as she smirked at me, "Uhh... am I missing something?" I asked them hesitantly. They looked at one another and laughed; Harry slyly tried to sling his arm over her shoulder but she shrugged out from under it, tossing him a pointed look, "Don't worry, Chan. Harold was just kind enough to lend me clothes so that I could play twister. I didn't really feel like flashing everyone my money shot with that skirt," she said as she winked at me.

"Not like anyone would have minded," we both heard Harry mumble rather unsubtly under his breath.

"Harry!" I said as I started laughing at his perviness. Jetta merely smacked him on the back of the head.

"Ouch! Violent!" he yelled out as he patted his fluffy curls where she'd smacked him. I swear, all of these boys had a hair obsession. All of them.

I then noticed the whisky bottles that Harry was holding in one of his hands, as well as a beer he handed to Niall, when he walked up to stand behind me. Harry caught my eye, "You want a shot, Chan?" he asked, as he set down 5 little shot glasses and began pouring the pungent smelling liquid in. I agreed as I picked up one of the shooters, but before I could bring it to my lips, Niall stopped me and pulled toward the hallway, away from the others.

"What's wrong?" I asked him curiously.

"I.. I jus wanted tah make sure this was alrigh' with yeh," he said as he motioned toward the shot in my hand and the beer in his own.

I dipped my brow in confusion as he elaborated further, "Yeh know... 'cus you said yer father used tah drink... and yer step da--" I hushed him by placing my finger against his lips. The softness and warmth that radiated from them made me want to resort to other techniques in order to shut him up, aka, my own mouth.

I leaned forward, "No, no, Niall. It's fine! I promise you. I feel like I'm in a safe place with people whom I can trust, so I don't have a problem with that at all," I whispered toward his ear before I bulled back and downed my first shot. The harsh liquid burned my throat and made my eyes water as it flowed through me. 

Niall laughed at the tight, uncomfortable smile that formed on my face after I finished the shot, "Woo! I'm not big on whisky, though," I said as I cleared my throat. "Do you guys have any vodka?" I asked as I cleared my burning throat again, yet still was unable to relieve the burning.

Niall nodded and I followed him into the kitchen where he pulled out a bottle of Skyy Vodka. My eyes sparkled at the sight of the pretty bottle; although I didn't really enjoy the taste of anything other than beer, I was able to stomach vodka more easily than other forms of hard liquor.

"Yeh sure?" he asked me again, " I jus don' wantya tah feel like yeh have tah do sumthin' yeh don't feel comfortable with," he finished sweetly as he studied my eyes.

I almost wanted to jump on him because of the concern he was showing for me... no one had ever actually asked me if I was comfortable with a situation like this before. I swear, Niall just surprised me more every second. Even though I was completely fine with drinking, I still found it incredibly sweet that he cared enough about me to ask.

"I'm sure, Niall. Let's go have some fun, OK?" I asked as I extended my hand out to his. He gave me my favorite smile as he grabbed my hand and walked me back over to where everyone was sitting around the mat, just talking nonsense.

"OK, everyone ready?' Louis asked as he stood up. We all nodded and scooted closer to the mat, trying to figure out who would go first. "I think youngest should go first!" Louis hollered! Of course Louis would suggest that, since he was the geezer of the group. I figured it was no point in arguing and went ahead and "Spun the Harry." We all watched on excitedly as his little smiling face circled around the board. After a few seconds I smiled a little as it landed on **Left hand Niall.**

I glanced up at Niall and he threw me a wink and everyone else snickered as I stood and walked over to the far end of the mat (since Niall's faces covered where the green dots usually were). I was just happy that I wouldn't have to bend over and put my butt in everyone's face since I had on low-riders. I stood over all of Niall's faces and picked the photo where he was cocking his brow and put my left hand on it.

Jetta was only a few months older than me so she went next, she also spun and got a Niall face, so she smiled at me from across the mat and stood next to me as she place her right foot on the picture next to the one I'd chosen. Of course, everyone knows that Harry is the baby of One Direction, so he got to go next. Harry bent over and did his hair flip thing before he excitedly flicked the spinner and watched as his own smiling face whirled around the board. It landed on **Left foot Louis.** Lou's faces were lined up right next to Niall's so Harry stood and walked over to where Jetta and I were and stood in front of us.

Zayn spoke up from the side lines, "You guys do understand the concept of the game, right? You don't want to bunch yourself up from the start!" he said in an exasperated voice. I laughed a little bit... calm down Zayn. Niall spun next and he got **Right foot Louis.** I smiled at him as he came and stood facing me, squatting gracefully to place his hand over one of Lou's weird ass faces.

"God... our faces aren't getting any love tonight," Liam commented sadly to Zayn, who in turned scoffed, "Just go spin, Liam," he said with a laugh, "maybe you'll get to go stand on your own face!"

"I can only hope," he said dreamily as he flicked the spinner and watched as it landed on **Right foot Zayn.**

"Oh, I see... just no love for Liam tonight..." he pouted playfully as he waltzed over and smashed his foot on Zayn's face, probably harder than necessary. Zayn rolled his eyes and flicked the spinner; as I waited for Zayn to walk over and put his **Left hand on Niall** , I glanced at the clock on the wall and noticed it was barely 11:30pm... strange, it actually felt a lot later.

Finally Louis was up and he spun, of course landing on his own face so he went over and slipped in between Harry and Niall. I laughed at how comfortable they were with each other... sometimes the 1D Bromances just really made sense to me.

We kept taking turns spinning the Harry, and after we'd had about five turns each as well as three shots each, we were actually in quite a tangled mess. Not gonna lie... this game is even better than I thought it'd be. I especially love playing it with so many people; it always makes it harder and much more fun.

I was giggling uncontrollably as I watched Nialler reach over across Louis to flick the spinner. We were already in quite a mess, however, no one had fallen yet, so you know... the pressure was on. Niall groaned as the spinner landed on **R **i** ght hand Zayn,** which was the furthest dot away from him.

Currently I was hanging out in a crab walk position, with my front half facing upward. My left leg was extending across the mat, underneath Zayn, and Louis was almost making a bridge over my torso as he leaned sideways. Jetta seemed to be oddly enough twisted up with Liam, and the best part was Zayn's butt in Harry's face. He hadn't stopped griping about it since Zayn's last move. I started laughing really hard at Niall as he adjusted him self so he now only had one of his arms over my legs, while the rest of him stretched out toward the Liam and Jetta knot.

Louis seemed to enjoy passing the time by making faces at me, since after all our faces were somewhat close. After Liam, it was Zayn's turn again, and unfortunately, he couldn't reach far enough underneath my legs to get to the Niall faces, since both Louis and Niall were still somewhat hovering over me, blocking his path. My arms were getting a little shaky, honestly, I'd been in this position for a while now and just wanted to turn over to make things easier for myself, but Louis was in my way.

Louis spun next and realized that he was going to have to drape his left leg across my body so that he could reach the Niall faces. I glanced toward Niall, meeting his eyes as Louis climbed over me, throwing one of his legs on one side of my hip so it was like he was doing a standing straddle over my pelvis. Not gonna lie, it was awkward... but that did not mean I didn't have my Louis feels making my body go haywire, since ya know his crotch was in my face for a few seconds before he finally bent down to place his hands on the correct faces. I saw a little gleam of frustration flutter over Niall's eyes as he watched Louis position himself over me, our faces were really close together now; I just hoped he wouldn't fall down because then he'd crush me. I also got slightly irritated  now because if I were to turn over it would definitely look wrong. I'm just saying...

Niall let out a huff as he tried to get comfortable, while I flicked the spinner. I was quite excited when it said right hand Zayn, because that meant I'd have to weasel my way out from under Louis and turn my body so that I was reaching over Niall.

"OK, Lou... on the count of three, move your hand so I can move,"I said as I met his eyes which were still really close to my face. Niall flattened out a little bit so that I could reach over him; as I did so, I noticed a happy smile on his lips.

"'Nother shot? Ni asked me as I got settled leaning over him, Zayn poured one for me and I took it easily. After the first few that dreadful burning disappeared and I was thankful for that. I decided to cheat a little and lean my chest against Niall's back, to remove some of the pressure from my arm. He could have called me out, but he just looked over his shoulder and smiled at me. My mind was fuzzy as I focused in on his beautiful face and adorable braces. It may sound weird, but I was going to really miss his braces when they finally came off.

"Hey Ni?" I asked while Jetta and Harry took their turns.

"Yes?"  He asked sweetly. I noticed his eyes were focusing in on my lips, but that may have been because I was actually focusing on his braces, so maybe I was sending mixed signals. I brought my face even closer to him as I flipped my head backward to keep my falling tendrils of hair out of my face. Of course my hair wasn't cooperating so I kept trying to blow it out of my face; Niall noticed my struggle and held himself up with one arm as he pushed the unruly strands behind my ears. Bless him.

I refocused on what I was going to ask him, my muddled brain just felt like mush, "When are you getting your braces off?" I asked like it was a bit of vital information that I really needed to know.

"Oi... I bel'eve it's 'bout undah six months," he said, giving me a big bracey smile. I smiled back softly at him, "I'm going to miss them," I said absentmindedly.

"Really?" he asked sounding shocked, "Why?"

"I don't know. I guess it's 'cus they remind me that you're still the same boy I fell in love with while watching those video diaries. I feel like when they finally come off, you'll be this huge sex symbol that will be desired by even more women than you already are!" I said as I stared at him probably a little too intensely.

Wait I can't be sure but I think I just told him I fell in love with him... ughh... stupid foggy brain. Oh well, it's not like he hasn't read that in those letters.

He squinted his eyes at me as he absorbed my words, then he asked a question of his own, 'Hey did you have braces, Chan?" he inquired, studying me with curious eyes.

"Oh no." I said with an eye roll as I gave him a smile, "See my bottom teeth actually aren't very straight., not to mention my teeth are tiny, I've always hated that." I said as we heard a thump from across that mat and saw that Liam was now out. Now it was just down to Harry, Jetta, Niall and me. I'm not sure if Louis fell, or quit the game, but I glanced toward the kitchen and saw him smiling like a lunatic as he spoke on the phone. Must be talking to Eleanor.

"I think yer teeth 'er beautiful," Niall confessed softly. I blushed a little at his words and I could tell this blush wasn't just from my slight embarrassment of the compliment, this blush came from that alcohol that was painting my cheeks and making me feel warm and tingly. I started to giggle a little bit at the fact that we were complimenting each other's teeth. How weird is that?

I went back to my original statement, "Well, regardless, your Hollywood smile is going to bust out of it's constraints very soon, and I'm just going to really miss this one," I said as I unconsciously drew myself closer to his face. Someone cleared their throat so Niall reached for the spinner without even looking and gave it a flick. This boy was great at multi-tasking while drunk. Honestly, right now I was having a hard time remembering how to breathe and blink. Niall glanced at the board and smiled broadly as he rolled over and moved his arm back toward where mine had been.

Niall was now holding himself in a position much like I had been doing just a few minutes ago. He helped me adjust my clumsy hands around him so that I wouldn't wipe out, causing both of us to fall. I heard Harry complaining from across the mat, "I swear you two are cheating!" he accused, "Look their position, and look at us!!" He hollered over to Jetta. As soon as I saw them, my body started shaking with laughter, they were standing butt to butt facing in opposite directions.

The laughing immediately brought up some hiccups that resulted from the last shot I took. My arms were really starting to wobble as I looked down at Niall. He smiled back up at me wide eyed, and probably figured the end was near because he squeezed his eyes shut in order to brace himself for the impact of our fall. I really tried to hold out, but as I glanced back at Jetta and Harry only to see Harry's scowling face, I knew I was a gonner as I plummeted onto Niall's waiting chest. We fell down the the few inches distance to the floor, and I noticed as Niall held back a groan from the impact of my weight. He's such a lovely boy, I swear.

He was laughing along with me as I rolled my face against his neck and giggled like a school girl. I had no intention of moving my face, even when I got myself under control. His skin just smelled so good; I could detect the fading scent of cologne, but I could also just smell the sweet, woodsy scent that was all Nialler. I breathed in deeply and then grimaced at my actions, hoping he didn't realize what I'd just done. That would be embarrassing. I turned my head slightly to look at him, noticing that my long hair had fallen over both of our faces, covering us up like a little privacy curtain. I was about to sit up so that he wouldn't have to be like... eating my hair; but I stopped as he ran his fingers through my hair, twisting a few strands around his pointer finger.

It was kind of nice because even though my hair was down and somewhat in the way, I could still see Niall's bright eyes perfectly, and they were illuminated by the little rays of light that were sneaking in between my whisps of dark hair, leaving a pattern across his face. I noticed he was smiling cheekily at me as I heard Jetta and Harry doing a victory dance and high fiving, but I honestly couldn't care less about that right now. I was still sprawled out over Niall's body and I felt his hand clutch at my exposed hip as he held his cheeky smile. Eventually he whispered subtly to me, "The smell a yer hair is drivin' meh crazy," he said, with a slight husky tinge ringing in his beautiful accent.

Both the sound of his voice and his breath against my ear sent thousands of goosebumps scurrying up my arms, and I probably would have been blushing had the alcohol not already stained my cheeks a permanent rosy color. As Niall and I lay their staring at one another, using my hair as a flimsy barrier from the other prying eyes in the room, in that moment I felt more alive and more in control than I had in years. I felt safe and guarded, yet respected. I would give anything to be able to feel this way every day; I knew that wasn't realistic, but right here, right now I felt I was absolutely in the right place.

Everyone is trying to find that one person in life worth keeping; we're constantly on a mission to find a safe place to store our heart, a safe hand to hold it... but not only that. We try to find someone to encourage our hopes and dreams, someone to shelter us from our past, someone who accepts our mistakes, and someone who will protect us from not only others, but from ourselves as well. It's hard to find a fairytale ending, but maybe that's because we don't allow ourselves to accommodate the rules  to fit our situation. We let tradition and the opinions of others interfere with our decisions, with our lives... with our happiness. I may have just officially met this boy  a few days ago, but I've never felt safer with anyone since I lost my father. As his golden-blue eyes captured mine, I knew that this boy was worth fighting for.

We'll never know what we're actually looking for, but when you get that feeling... that feeling deep down in the pit of your stomach... that feeling that suddenly changes everything, you just can't let it go. You can't fight it because you're scared... I can't fight it because I'm scared. Niall's eyes closed and although I could still hear the soft murmuring going on around us, I was grateful for those in the room who were letting us have our moment. I felt my eyes slip shut as our lips came together in a sweet moment of surrender. His soft lips felt firm against mine and I shuddered as his fingers softly caressed my cheek. My breathing hitched as a warm feeling coursed throughout my body, and although our kiss was short and tame, I knew that everything had changed.  I wanted to be his. At that moment, I knew I'd fallen in love honestly, and I was wearing my heart on my sleeve. I could only hope that the frantic beating of his heart that I felt vibrating against my chest, meant that he'd fallen too.


	12. Que Sera, Sera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall sings Channing a lullaby

**Niall's P.O.V**

Her lips tasted of vanilla and it was something that I would never get enough of; after our short kiss, we pulled apart and I was just looking at Channing as we shared a quiet moment together, right in the middle of the living room. I was honestly surprised no one had jumped on us yet. Her hair was still draped over us, but had started sliding off of my face, so I scooped it up in my hand and brushed it over her shoulder, freeing us both. Being able to see her face without the shadow of her hair hiding it was actually a relief, especially since her eyes were no longer puffy from crying earlier. Her cheeks were red and warm though from the alcohol. I wasn't exactly drunk, but I was tipsy. Chan on the other hand, I'm pretty sure she was a little ways passed tipsy; I didn't want to get too hammered because I wanted to make sure Channing felt comfortable... I wanted her to feel she could trust me... and that I could keep her safe.

I heard hushed whispering coming from behind me and so did Channing, so she propped herself up by leaning on my chest as she called out, "Hey Jet what's up?"

"You're alive!" Jetta said faking excitement, but the laughter quickly left her eyes and was replaced with another emotion... worry.

Channing ignored her comment, "What're you guys doin'?" she slurred in a sleepy voice. I still lay on my back, since I was now pinned under Channing, and the arm that I had draped around her waist found some skin that was peeking out so I absentmindedly began brushing my fingertips back and forth over her exposed hip. She tensed up for a moment, but didn't ask me to stop so I kept doing it. After a few seconds, I could feel goosebumps, and I smiled at the fact that I was giving them to her.

Chan cleared her throat, probably trying to focus on the others and not my wandering hands, "Jetta..." she trailed off uncertainly.

Jetta smiled, "Well the good news is, apparently you guys are 'OFFICIAL,'" she laughed and did air quotes, "So congratulations," she said with a smile.

I rolled my eyes, but didn't mind at all. I really cared for Channing, but I didn't want to take it faster unless she wanted me to. Regardless, I was already dreading the hate that she was bound to get. I don't know how I'd be able to handle it; honestly, if my fans got to the extremes that they sometimes do over Eleanor, I'm not kidding when I say I'll snap. It'll be much worse than Lou and his little Twitter fits as well.

Jetta shrugged her shoulders slightly as she continued, "Everyone's twitter's are just blowing up after tonight, and I was nervous to how you'd handle the attention. You know very well how... unpleasant some directioners can be," she explained while twisting her hair around her finger.

I realized I hadn't checked Twitter since the concert either; so I adjusted Channing by rolling her off of my hip so I could quickly retrieve my phone. I was happy to see Channing scurry back to resting against my chest as she looked on at my phone as well. As soon as I opened my twitter app, I braced myself for the worst, I was especially nervous since Chan was curious and wanted to see as well.

"Check out the trends!" Louis said with a laugh, "Eleanor said they've been nothing but 1D related topics all night," he called from the kitchen counter he was currently perched on. He must have been on the phone with El, since he began listening intently again to whoever was on the other end of his phone call.

I clicked over to the discover tab before bothering to dive into my never ending mentions; as soon as the trends loaded, I almost started laughing. Our fans were so... peculiar. The four trending topics that I noticed were related to us were;

**#IrishYouLovedMe**

**#DirectionersArePervs**

**#MakeAMessOfNiallersInnocence**

**#ChiallerIsOfficial**

We both laughed a little bit at the trend that discussed my "innocence." Channing and I spent the next few minutes going through my mentions, laughing at most. Many fans were asking if Channing and I were a couple, in all honesty, it was a little awkward, because I didn't want to confirm anything yet. Although I would love for her to be, I also didn't want to acknowledge it because I wanted to protect her from my fans. I guess it was just something we'd have to talk about later. When I refreshed the page I also saw a lot of videos people were tagging me in, most seemed to be from the concert, while Channing was being serenaded.

We watched a few of them, and I looked at Chan from the corner of my eye to see a smile and a soft look in her eye as she relived me singing to her on stage. As I closed the app, I rolled over to face her again and watched as she stifled a yawn; glancing at the time on my phone I noticed it was nearing 3am. I looked over my shoulder to see Liam, Harry, and Jetta sitting together on the couch... looking pretty cozy. That won't turn out well.

I looked around for Louis and Zayn; I'm assuming Louis went back to his room because he was no where to be seen, but I spotted Zayn curled up on one of the arm chairs, covered with a blanket.

"Aye, didya wanta sleep in meh bed ta'night?" I asked Channing as she yawned again, "I can sleep out 'ere or sumthin,'" I added on quickly, not wanting her to feel pressured to share a bed with me.

She quickly opened her eyes and smiled at me, "No! I'm not kicking you out of your room. I don't mind you sleeping with me, Niall," she said as if it were the most normal thing in the world. I was more than OK with that. I reluctantly untangled myself from her and climbed to my feet, after standing and stretching my arms over my head for a moment, I bent over, grasping her hand as I pulled her to her feet as well.

We began shuffling toward my room when we heard Jetta yell at our retreating backs, "Night Bitch! Hey use protection!" she said with a wink.

Channing rolled her eyes, waving her hand at Jetta, "Oh shut up. You have fun with that threesome you guys got going on over there," she motioned toward the three of them sitting on the couch. Jetta was laying on her back, with her head in Harry's lap, and her legs were curled up along Liam.

I laughed loudly as I grabbed Channing's hand, pulling her into the room, as Jetta replied, "Pfft! Oh we will! Right boys?" she asked them teasingly, however I did see a little excited spark in Harry's eyes. Poor lad, she really shouldn't lead him on like that.

Channing and I entered the room giggling, yeah I'll admit, I think my tipsiness and my sleepiness was making me more prone to giggling rather than chuckling. Oh well, it is what it is. She went into the bathroom and left the door open, I watched her as she washed her hands and face off; it was nice because she didn't wear a lot of make up, so she looked exactly the same. It wasn't like she was taking off a mask. I always got a little creeped out when girls looked like two different people with their make up on and off. I was kind of standing by the bathroom door, watching her reflection in the mirror, I was so distracted with how comfortable and normal all of this seemed that I didn't even notice that I probably looked a little creepy.

She grabbed for the toothpaste I had in the medicine cabinet and actually just squirted some in her mouth as well as some on her finger as she smeared it around her teeth. I laughed a little bit, since that's something I do too when I don't have a toothbrush handy.

"Hey, Olive..." when I called her that I saw her eyes light up, making me my heart beat a little faster, "I 'ave an extrah brush if yah wanta use it?" I asked her.

She smiled, "Yes! Please, that would be terrific... I just can't go to bed without brushing my teeth... sorry," she said sheepishly as she washed the toothpaste off her hands.

I laughed softly, "Nuthin' wrong with good hygiene," I commented as I reached under the sink and grabbed the last toothbrush that remained in the pack of four I'd bought a few months ago. She accepted it gratefully, and I went ahead and grabbed my toothbrush, putting a big glob of toothpaste on it and shoving it in my mouth.

"Sheesh Niall... I believe they recommend a pea sized amount... not the size of a pancake," she laughed as I started brushing my teeth, already feeling foam trying to dribble out of my mouth. Wow, how attractive.

"Wha" you 'fraid shyou can't handle ish?" I asked with my mouth full of the foamy minty stuff.

I felt my stomach growl when she mentioned pancakes, and when I looked over as she squeezed a big ass glob on her tooth brush as well. She looked at it hesitantly for a moment before thrusting it in her mouth and squeezing her eyes shut. I laughed as she gagged a little bit since she put so much toothpaste in her mouth. OK... those last few sentences sounded wrong... But you now what I meant...

She spit out a little bit and then went ahead and began brushing vigorously along with me; I watched her in the mirror, her cheeks were puffed up, holding in all the toothpaste foam, and I started to choke a little bit from laughter as I watched her cross her eyes in the mirror at me and make a face. Eventually, I think we both had so much foam in our mouths we were about to explode, so we ended up spitting at the same time, and rinsing all the crap out of our mouths.

After drying off my mouth, I looked at her and gave her a big goofy smile. She came closer to me and wiped the corner of my mouth with her thumb as she leaned over and whispered, "Ya missed some," with a coy little smile. Her minty breath rolled off of my lips as she drew closer to me, making me shiver.

"Hey Ni?" she asked, our faces barely an inch apart.

"Ya?" I asked, after clearing my throat.

"Can I borrow something to sleep in?" she asked sweetly, as she stopped literally a millimeter away from my lips. I guess she was playing that game waiting for me to meet her the rest of the way, and I was more than happy to oblige. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers gently as I pulled her body closer to mine and wrapped my arms around her waist. I captured her mouth with mine, in a needy, desperate kiss. I took a chance and poked my tongue between her lips, and was rewarded with her easily opening and deepening the kiss. My hands that were resting on her hips slowly slid up the sides of her body, until I gently held her face in my hands. She let my tongue message hers as she tangled her hands in my hair, tugging on it slightly as things got more heated.

Reluctantly, I pulled away slightly as I rested my forehead against hers, but I still held her against me and she left her fingers tangled in my hair.

"Sorreh... I don't wanta pressure you," I mumbled softly as our excited breathing slowly returned to normal.

"Niall, if I ever feel uncomfortable, I'll tell you, OK?" she said, as she placed one more kiss on my lips and one on my cheek as she walked back into the bedroom. I stood there for a second, my mind was still hazy, as I slowly sank back to earth. I shook my head and quickly followed her into the bedroom, she was lying sideways on the bed, with her legs hanging over the side as she smiled up at the ceiling. After I stood there staring at her for only God knows how long, I suddenly remembered what she'd originally asked me, "Oh, clothes! Right!" I said, mostly to myself. I walked over to the dresser that was sitting against the far wall and rummaged around until I pulled out a pair of CK boxers and an old Jack Wills shirt.

I turned around to find her sitting up, watching me, "Will this do?" I asked as I approached her. She nodded and accepted the clothes; I walked away toward the other side of the bed, offering her some privacy. I had expected her to want to change in the bathroom, but she didn't seem bothered by changing in front of me. I sat on the other side of the bed, facing away from her, I didn't want her to think I was a pervert. I mean, I am... what boy isn't? But still...

I felt the bed move, so thinking she was done, I turned around; however, I realized she'd just been standing up to slide off her jeans. Um... whoops. She caught me looking at her and blushed slightly, but didn't seem too bothered. My long shirt was covering her knickers, all I could see were her thighs. As my eyes slid down her legs, I realized my gaze was lingering on dark slashes that littered her upper thighs. At that moment, I felt my heart sink. Absolutely break in half, plummet, and sink just like the titanic. At first, I don't think she even realized what I was able to see, but as soon as she looked down, and spied the taunting angry marks peeking out at her, her eyes grew wide and glassy as she slowly backed away from me.

"Chan!" I called out urgently as I realized she was running away from me, but before I could even blink, she was back in the bathroom, with the door slamming behind her. I cursed under my breath as I thought about how rude I was for staring. I knew they were there so why did I react that way?

I stood there having a conversation with myself in my mind, until I realized that I wasn't scared or disgusted by those scars that marred her skin. Rather I was upset. I was upset at anyone that may have caused her to resort to hurting herself like that. I thought about just letting her take a few moments to calm down before trying to beg for her to open the door. So I lay on the bed, just staring at the bathroom door, willing her to come out. For a few minutes I just let my eyes trace the intricate patterns that decorated the wooden door, and I felt a pang of guilt as I compared them to the marks on Chan's skin. I just wanted to hold her and make sure she never did anything like that again.

I sat up quickly when I heard soft crying from under the door, then all of a sudden, something popped in my head that terrified me. I had razors of my own in that bathroom. I immediately sprang from the bed, tripping a little as I got tied up in my duvet. As I came to the door I began urgently pounding on it, without trying to scare her; in all honestly I was scared of what she could be doing behind that door.

 

**Channing's P.O.V**

After I slammed the bathroom door shut, I put my head in my hands as I slid backwards against the hard door until I was sitting down with my head between my knees trying to calm down. I don't know why I freaked out just now and ran away... Niall didn't even say anything, he was probably just curious... But I should have been more careful, I don't want anyone seeing my disgusting thighs. I don't even want to have to look at them, so why would anyone else? I can feel my breath hitching, and my throat burns as I try not to gasp for breath. My mind felt clouded and foggy, and I thought I was going to begin a full blown panic attack. What if Niall says he can't handle someone with scars like mine? What if he makes an excuse for me to leave and never contacts me again? I mean, I guess I sort of expected that to happen anyway... But it still squeezed my heart painfully when I think about him being disgusted with me.

As I lay my head against the door, I actually felt my eyes growing heavy and they began to droop closed. I was in that land in between asleep and awake, when a sudden urgent pounding at the door scared every inch of exhaustion out of my body, and I scurried away toward the sink..

"Channing, PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR. PLEASE," he begged as he continued his assault on the door. I was torn as what to do, although I was still incredibly embarrassed, he sounded so desperate, and I wasn't sure why.

"Olive, you can trust me with anything," his whispered voice floated in so quietly underneath the door that I almost felt like I imagined his plea. I hear a deep sigh and the pounding stops for a few seconds, only to be replaced with an even more jarring assault. Is he kicking it now?

I decide I don't want him to hurt himself so I hesitantly approach the deep mahogany wood and place my ear and hand against the door as I say in a wavering voice,"Niall please, stop," my voice sounds rough from my little fit I just threw. But as soon as I ask him to stop beating down the door, Niall immediately complies.

"Are you OK?" He asks, his voice drenched in concern.

"I'm fine, Niall.... I'm sorry," I reply in a hoarse voice.

"Can yeh please open the door, Chan? Don't ever feel like you have tah hide anythin' from me, especially yer body," he said softly but with a lot of emotion. I wiped away the remaining tears that had frozen to my cheeks, and something in his voice just told me to listen to him. To trust him... To believe he would take care of me.

I slowly flipped the lock and he immediately twisted the handle, allowing himself to barge through and right into me. His arms wrapped around my shaking frame as he pulled me close to him, tucking my face in between his chest and chin. I could feel his heart racing, and for some reason, I couldn't figure out why this would have gotten him so worked up.

He kissed the top of my head and as he spoke, his still minty breath traipsed across my face, leaving shivers down my spine, "Yeh scared me... Don' do that... You have nuthin' tah be embarrassed about, love," his soothing whispers wrapped around me, not only embracing my body, but my damaged heart as well.

I hiccuped a few times, "I'm sorry," I said miserably, as silent tears dripped down my face, soaking his shirt. I squeezed him tighter to me, as if the tighter I squeezed him, the more I could keep myself from falling apart.

"Don't be sorreh, jus don' ever run frum me," he said as he cupped my chin, nudging my head up, making me look him in the eyes. Those beautiful eyes that just made me want to spill all my secrets and forget my past.

I felt my body go limp as Niall took me in his arms and we slid down, sitting against the now closed again bathroom door. He held me in his arms as I took deep breaths trying to calm my overzealous emotions. He cuddled me against his chest, stroking my tangled hair softly, while humming a familiar tune in my ear. I knew I'd heard it before... but my frazzled mind just couldn't place the memory.

We sat in comfortable silence for a moment before he spoke next, "Channing... I know yeh feel ashamed of yer past, an' insecure about yer body... But you have no reason to be. You are beautiful..." He trailed off and after a moment of hesitation he took my wrist in his hands and pushed up my bracelets, "These marks... These memories etched in yer skin, they do not make yeh ugly or weak," I met his gaze as I felt my eyes welling up with tears, as his fingertips ever so gently traced the snarling patterns of my self hatred. The ugly slashes that took mere minutes for me to carve into my skin, but would last me a lifetime.

He looked me closely in the eye for a minute, "Let me see?" He asked softly as his kind hands tugged gently on the edge of the boxers I wore. My body tensed up slightly, I was about to immediately object, but something in his eyes captivated me. Showing me I could trust him, telling me if I bared my soul to him, I would be OK. I would in fact be better.

I gave him a small nod, and after softly caressing the part of my exposed thigh that wasn't scarred, he gently tugged up one of the boxer legs high enough to see my shameful mutilation. I watched his face for his reaction; looking for and expecting repulsion and disgust... But as I stared long and hard, watching as his eyebrows slightly furrowed and crumpled together, the emotion I saw wasn't pity. It wasn't disgust. The emotion I saw on his face was hurt. As if by hurting myself, I had hurt him. Even though there was nothing he could have done for me at the time; I could tell as he delicately traced his his thumb over one particularly ugly gnash, he met my eyes and gave me a look that just screamed at me that this had to end. This had to stop.

I blinked back tears as he pulled up the other boxer leg to examine more shameful marks, I felt so exposed... so humiliated... so naked. I did feel all of those things... but as I watched him gently trace his fingers against both legs, as if he were trying to memorize the patterns, I also felt relief... and acceptance. I felt like this boy could actually make me feel beautiful again, especially when he looked at me, the way he was looking at me now.

"Chan... these scars," he began as he motioned to my wrists and thighs, "these marks, they make yeh who you h are. Don't ever be ashamed of who yeh are. I think yer beautiful, ev'ry freckle... ev'ry blemish... ev'ry scar," he finished softly, but only paused for a second to readjust me so that I was sitting on his lap, facing him with my legs wrapped around his waist.

He leaned his forehead against mine again as he continued soothing my mind and soul, "I wanna hold yeh like this ev'ry day and remind yeh of that. You are perfect. Yer scars may remain here," he said as he brushed his fingers across my thighs, "But let me show yeh, that the scars in here... they can be healed. They can be erased," he whispered as he brought his hand and placed it against my heart.

I couldn't help it... as soon as those words left his mouth, tears were racing down my cheeks, and I was holding him to me as tightly as I possibly could, "Why Niall? Why, me? I have nothing to offer you... I have nothing to give. Why do you bother? There are so many girls... better girls..." I asked through my sobs, with my forehead still resting against his.

"Yeh don't know what yer worth Channing... but I'm gonna show you. Yer all I can see, and I'm gonna make yeh believe it. I'm gonnah fix you," he whispered gently against my lips as he brought his hand around, holding the nape of my neck, pulling me to him, while his other hand rest softly against my cheek. He kissed me with more passion and more intensity than I have ever felt in my seventeen years of life. I melted into him, letting go of my resentment, letting go of my hatred for myself and for my past. In this moment, I was whole. I was happy, and even though he didn't say it... I felt loved.

Niall lifted me in his arms and carried me toward the bed, we were still sharing our heated kiss, so I was quite impressed with his ability to walk, because I myself, felt like a blob of jello. We broke apart as he lay me down, and I watched him stand back up to strip off his shirt. As he was about to pull his pants down, he hesitated and met my gaze, "Yeh don' mind do yeh?" he asked me sweetly. A small smile wrapped around my lips as I closed my eyes and shook my head.

He climbed into the bed and I faced him as he cuddled me against his chest and intertwined his legs with mine. He seemed to jump a little when I put my bare feet against his warm calves. I giggled at his reaction as he spoke, "Oi, yer feet 're freezin'!"

"I shrugged my shoulders slightly, "Sorry... they always are. That's a reason why Jetta hates sharing a bed with me... cause my feet are seriously always cold.

"Well I'll fix that," he said with a wink as he wrapped his legs tighter around mine, pulling me closer. He gave me a soft kiss on the nose, making me blush, "I hear yah also hog tha blankets?" he questioned with a raised brow.

I laughed at his accusation, "Pfft... no..." I replied as I rolled my eyes. The funny look he gave me made me just reach up and pull his lips to press against mine. It was just a short kiss, but it was so sweet and soft, I felt my heart racing again.

"Niall?" I asked him uncertainly.

"Yes, love?" he asked, still not removing his gaze that was focused on my lips as I spoke.

"Can you... sing to me? What were you humming in the bathroom?" I inquired. The tune sounded familiar but I couldn't place it.

"Sure," he said with a big smile..." Er... tha' was actually a lullaby me mudder used tah sing fer me," he said softly as he caressed my back softly.

That's when it clicked in my mind, "What's it called Niall?" I asked hopefully.

"Que Sera, Sera," he said as he placed a soft kiss to my lips once more. Every time his lips touched mine I just felt like my whole body was on fire.

My breathing hitched, "My father used to sing that for me... I haven't heard it since I was little... please sing it?" I begged him as I lay my face against his bare chest. I breathed in deeply, taking all of him in. His scent was mesmerizing.

He kissed the top of my head, "Of course, sweet heart," he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

I smiled to myself, just thinking about how many things regarding Niall would being back memories of my father... it was so nice. It was what I needed.

I felt myself sinking into Niall's warm skin as I listen to the beautiful trill of his voice as he softly sang one of the most treasured nursery rhymes of my childhood;

_"When I was just a young lad_ _I asked my mother, what will I be_ _Will I be handsome, will I be rich_ _Here's what she said to me._  
 _Que Sera, Sera,_ _Whatever will be, will be_ _The future's not ours, to see_ _Que Sera, Sera_ _What will be, will be."_

His accent swam into my ears and lulled me to a stage of of feeling in between awake and asleep, only this time... I wasn't fighting it. I was embracing it as he continued the song,  
" _When I was young, I fell in love_ _I asked my sweetheart what lies ahead_ _Will we have rainbows, day after day_ _Here's what my sweetheart said._  
 _Que Sera, Sera,_ _Whatever will be, will be_ _The future's not ours, to see_ _Que Sera, Sera_ _What will be, will be."_

As Niall whispered the final line, and his breath blew across my cheek, I was almost pulled under the tides of darkness and dreams, but before I let myself become fully submerged, I thought I heard him whisper one more thing,

"You'll be okay. I'm not going anywhere... I love you," his voice was so light I think I may have imagined it, but as he kissed my head, it was like the kiss of sleep... because as soon as his lips touched my forehead, I was overtaken by a sea of black, but it was okay... knowing that I was in his arms, and he would keep me safe.


	13. That Awkward Moment... When Louis Tomlinson Gives You Herpes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis gives Jetta herpes herpes simplex 1... jk... or am I?

**Jetta's P.O.V**  
As soon as I saw Channing's already trembling arms begin shaking even more violently after Harry's cheating accusation, I knew that we had this game in the bag. I could tell Niall knew it was over too when he started laughing with her. After I saw them tumble down to the floor together I immediately jumped up and cheered! What can I say? I'm competitive! I turned around to give Harold a high five, but apparently when I jumped up, since we were in a weird position, I butt bounced him... sending him flying to the floor. I looked down at him and watched as he rolled over onto his back with a simple, "Ouch."

I covered my mouth to keep my obnoxious laugh that wanted to tear out of my throat at bay. Harry reached his hand up to me, asking for my help. I felt a little bad so I went ahead and grabbed a hold of his warm palm. Bad idea.

Before I knew what hit me, the air was whooshing by and I got that uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, you know... that feeling when your body thinks you're plummeting to your death, or in my case, onto Harry Styles. I landed on him with a loud thud, purposely not trying to catch myself so that he'd get the gift of my full weight falling onto his ribs. He groaned slightly, but otherwise just gave me a cheeky grin as I propped myself up on my hands and hovered over him. Damn, I at least wanted to knock the wind out of him.

We seemed to be having a stare off because I only fully pulled myself up and away from him when I heard Liam clear his throat from the chair where he was sitting, obviously watching us, "Hey Jet... I was unaware we were playing a couples' game of Twister..." he said, giving me a knowing smile.

Oh shit. What was I thinking. It was supposed to be every man for himself... awkward.

"Oh... well, Harry still fell first, so that means... I win," I reasoned quickly, giving myself a high five.

Both boys just shook their heads at my apparent awkwardness, "I guess we'll just have to play on teams tomorrow!" Harry exclaimed, "I call Jetta!" he said as he hugged onto my legs since he had yet to stand up.

"Pfft, who says I want to be on your team?" I asked as I looked down at his piercing green eyes. Even though I tried to hide it, I actually really did want to be on his team... but playing hard to get with Harry is so much more fun.

I shimmied out of his grip and trotted over to take a seat on Liam, "I think I want to be on Liam's team," I said excitedly. "I'm fine with that!" Liam replied as he threw his arm over my shoulder. I laughed a little at his move.

In all honesty the puppy dog, sweetie pie Liam we used to all know and love changed last year after his split with Danielle. He spent a lot of time trying to find himself after that... trying to create a new image, but still trying to be himself. There were a lot of people who bitched about this because "he was changing," but I never thought of it that way. I just saw it as he was growing. He can't always be the responsible little good boy we all fell in love with on the X-Factor; of course that will always be a part of who he is, but I just wish people would accept that he's going to change as he gets older. We all are.

I returned the gesture and wrapped my arm around his waist. To be honest, this newer Liam that we were still getting used to... I liked him. He was edgier and bolder. He will always be our little puppy dog... but now he's more of a Pit bull than a little baby Golden Retriever. I gave him a peck on the cheek and turned to find an irritated looking Harry.

"That's cool, I always got Lou," he said in an "I don't care" tone of voice. When he looked back at me, I held his stare for a couple of seconds, just really trying to figure him out. He looked away first though so I dropped my gaze to the mess of bodies that still lay on the Twister game. Channing and Niall were cuddling on the floor, their bodies intertwined. One of her legs was resting over the top of both of his, while he held her with one of his hands on her hip and the other I couldn't see because of her thick hair hiding them from my view, but from the angle of his elbow, he seemed to be cupping her cheek. Ooh la la.

Now sometimes, I can be a real bitch, and usually I would love to break up a sweet little moment such as this one... but they just looked so sweet I didn't want to. Liam seemed to notice what I was staring at probably because of the dumb droopy smile on my face. He moved me so that I was sitting on his other leg and he grabbed his phone out of his pocket. He then handed it to me motioning for me to be a creep and photograph the moment, which of course I was more than willing to do. I quickly snapped a photo, and then pulled it toward my face so that Li and I could look at it.

Channing's hair was still covering her face for the most part, but it was starting to slide off so that half of Niall's face was clearly visible. He was curled into her with his eyes shut and the smallest, cutest, little closed mouth smile was visible.

"I kind of like this one because you can't see her face," Liam said quietly.

I quickly turned my head to give him a "what the hell look" but he was already explaining himself, "Look, if I upload it to Twitter, everyone will see Nialler cuddled up with someone, but no one will be able to tell who," Harry came over and was looking over my shoulder now at the picture, "Haha! Yeah the fans will go wild because of that... do it..." he said with a conniving smile.

I turned my head, looking back and forth at the two of them, "Oh my God. You guys are terrible. You like to torture us on purpose, don't you? Do you know how quickly rumors spread in this fandom?" I asked suspiciously.

Louis walked back in from the kitchen and jumped onto Harry's lap to see what we were doing. He must have overheard our conversation because he elaborated further, "Jetta... we love our fans TO DEATH, but they take every single aspect of our lives and blow it way out of proportion," he said seriously. The other boys nodded, agreeing with him.

"So?" I asked warily.

"So, sometimes it can be fun just to see what theories they come up with before we actually reveal the truth," Lou said as he shrugged his shoulders but then immediately continued on with another topic, "Have any of you checked twitter since the concert?" he asked in a hushed voice, I guess not to gain Channing or Niall's attention. As I glanced at them again, I realized he didn't really have to whisper. Those two were in their own little world right now.

I turned looking around for Zayn, until I spotted him sprawled out on one of the arm chairs, asleep. Damn what a party pooper. It was barely 1am. Harry looked over at Zayn as well before he shook his head and and chuckled, "He's always the first to pass out," Harry revealed as he slid Louis off of his lap, stood up and walked over to where Zayn was sleeping. At first I thought he was going to be a dick and jump on the chair or something, but he actually reached for the little quilt that was hanging over the chair. I almost "awwed" out loud as I watched Harry drape the blanket over his friend. Oh my God, how are these boys not gay? I have a lot of guy friends who would rather set themselves on fire than be caught covering one of their friends up with a blanket. Must be a British thing. Fucking adorable, perfect, little British boys. Unf.

I smiled at Harry when he looked my way and bashfully looked down, I don't know why, but when boys do sweet things for no reason at all, it always makes me blush. Apparently Louis and Liam had been having a pretty in depth conversation while I was oogling Harry, because as I zoned back in to their voices, I had no idea what they were going on about.

"Yeah, Eleanor said it's been blowing up since the concert. Apparently the main trend of the night has been **#chiallerisofficial** ," Louis said with a laugh. I started giggling too, if I wasn't here right now, I would be going crazy about that display that Niall put on at the concert as well. It's safe to say that I'd never seen them interact so... intensely... with their fans.

"Our girls are really impatient, aren't they?" Liam quipped, "They never wait for a confirmation before saying everyone is official," he said as he continued laughing.

I couldn't argue with him. Any time Harry talks to anyone, he freakin gets shipped.

I heard some rustling from where Chan and Niall were laying and looked up to see her grey eyes looking at me. They looked a little blood shot and her cheeks were pink from the alcohol. Awe... drunk Channy is so cute.

She started questioning me about what we were whispering about.. and to be honest I was a little nervous to inform her of all the talking going on about her on Twitter. So instead of beating around the bush, I was honest and told her that people were talking, and not everyone was saying nice things. To my surprise she just rolled her eyes... but I guess I should have expected that... she knows how bad things can get for anyone who associates themselves with these boys.

Niall pulled out his phone and they lay cuddled together reading and laughing about all of the tweets. I refocused on the baffoon's sitting around me though whenever I heard my name being mentioned.

"I'm sorry what was that?" I asked, looking pointedly at Harry.

He smirked, "Oh I was just saying that you look good in my clothes," he said with a mischievous smile. I rolled my eyes at his stupidity... but then smiled because I knew how to handle boys like this.

I slid off Liam's lap over onto Harry's and wrapped my arm around his neck to steady myself, as he took it upon himself to hold me around the waist. I leaned in real close to his ear as I whispered, "I was thinking these clothes would look even better on your hotel room floor..." I trailed off playfully with a wink.

His eyes grew wide as he absorbed the not so secret meaning behind my sentence. Wow... he was so easy to play. Don't get me wrong... I love Harry... but God before you know the guy, I don't think you can really comprehend how cocky he can be.

He quickly sucked in his breath and cleared his throat, before narrowing his eyes at me, "You're just a little minx arne't you?" he asked with a sly grin.

I gave him a cheeky smile, "Wouldn't you like to know..." I said as I stood up and walked into the kitchen to grab my now cold grilled cheese sandwich. Not like that mattered to me... it was still delicious. I noticed Louis was sitting on the counter again and I leaned up next to him as I chewed on my food. I was eavesdropping of course. He must not have noticed or he didn't seem to mind...

I could hear him talking through his teeth to someone as if he were trying control his temper, "El... it's nothing. No... sure have fun. OK... just call me later... bye," he sighed as he hung up his iPhone.

"Trouble in paradise?" I asked him as I leaned on the counter and stared up at  his downcast eyes.

"It's just the distance... and time apart, you know?" he said softly as he played with his fingers. The tone of his voice threw me off a little, because he didn't sound like the normally peppy and happy Lou we all knew. He just sounded... sad and deflated. I didn't like that. Louis is not allowed to be sad... it just throws the world all off balance. What the hell is he thinking... having emotions? His job is to be beautiful, happy, and fun... that's it.

I took a step out of my stupid, rambling mind and hopped up on the counter, sitting next to him. I scooted up real close as I thought about the best way to approach the situation. Before speaking, I offered him the rest of my cold grilled cheese slice. To my dismay he accepted it and shoved it in his mouth. Dammit... I was just trying to be polite... the little wanker wasn't supposed to actually take it.

I decided to quit whining over my loss and actually try to help him out of his slump, "Why do you stay together when you go on tours?" I asked him seriously. I was honestly curious. I never had a problem with "Elounor" in fact, I shipped it much more than "Larry." However, I was always honestly curious as to why they had stayed together for so long.

He looked at me like I had three heads as he answered me, "... umm... because I love her?" he stated, but the way he said it, it sounded more like a question.

I gave him a hard stare, "Do you? Cause to me, it just sounded like you were asking a question," I said as I grabbed a napkin and wiped off some of the breadcrumbs that remained on the corner of his mouth.

He was silent for a moment, before I decided to add on to my question, "Well... even if you do... it's not like you're married. You are touring right now, Lou. You are living the dream of sooo many young musicians. I'm not saying to break up with her, but if you don't see yourself marrying her, then why do you put up with the heartache?" I took a sip of my Pepsi before I continued, "Even if you did separate while you're away doesn't mean things won't work out in the future... but in all honesty, you both are always going to be miserable while you have this sort of life... and who knows... maybe there's someone else out there you are truly meant to be with," I finished.

He nodded his head as he sat there, letting my words sink in, "This once in a lifetime opportunity should be what you're putting your whole heart and soul into... but how can you do that when half of your heart is across the Atlantic ocean? If you're meant to be Lou, then you'll come together again... so cheer up kiddo," I said as I took my fist and playfully nudged his jaw. He gave me one of his bright smiles, and I felt some butterflies in my tummy.

He looked down at his hands they were resting on his lap, "You make a good point. I guess... I've just gotten so comfortable... knowing she's always there for me when I get home."

"Louis... it's not fair to her and it's not fair to yourself if you're only staying together out of habit... or for fear of being alone. Come on... live a little!" I said as bumped his shoulder.

He gave me another soft smile, "I guess I should talk to El, and see where we stand... thanks, Jet," he said sincerely. Although I love his goofy side, this calm, sincere side of his was really sweet... I was pretty happy to be getting to know another side of him, in all honesty, I felt a little flattered that he was opening up to me.

"What about you?" he asked as he playfully nudged my leg with his own.

"What about me?" I asked, a little unsure as to what he was getting at, as I absentmindedly wound my leg around his, locking it in place.

"Don't you have a boyfriend?" he asked sounding merely curious as he helped himself to a sip of my Pepsi.

I ignored his question for a moment as I yelled at him, "Hey! Coooooties! Blech.." I whined. I could still feel that I was a little drunk

He gave me a funny look, "Oh please, don't pretend like you don't want to drink after Louis Tomlinson," he said in a deep voice as he puffed up his chest.

"Dude, what if I have like... herpes or something. Ya know... here's a fun fact... nearly 70% of the population carries the herpes simplex 1 virus," I said as I shook my head disapprovingly, as I grabbed my Pepsi and took a drink.

He didn't seem phased by this information, in fact, he seemed amused, 'Well that's not a problem... you can't catch what you already have..." he trailed off in a taunting voice. When he made that comment, I started coughing and wiping my mouth off with the bottom of Harry's shirt, I was actually freaking out. Oh my God, cold sores are so gross... please God no.

I was experiencing that awkward moment... when Louis Tomlinson gives you herpes. It may sound really funny, but I was honestly freaking out on the inside. Louis held a serious face for a few more seconds before breaking out into his adorable laughter. I was still vigorously wiping my lips off when he grabbed my arm to calm me down, "No. I don't have herpes... and from your reaction, it would seem that you don't either!" he said accusingly.

I glared at him for tricking me out of my own joke, before I broke out into a smile, "Touche."

**Louis' P.O.V**

After Jetta and I finished laughing at the fit she threw when she thought she'd just acquired herpes, she randomly answered the question I'd asked her nearly five minutes ago, "Yeah... I kind of have a boyfriend," she stated, but for some reason, the way she said it... she didn't sound proud or excited about it.

"Kind of?" I pried further, trying to get her to open up.

"Yeah... we're not exclusive. He fucks other chicks constantly," she rambled off carelessly. I was truthfully a little shocked by her confession; she didn't seem like the type of girl that would go for that kind of relationship.

"Oh...." I said into the awkward silence, trying to figure out a way to get back to the comfortable place we were just at.

"It's not a big deal. I know I don't love him... so why should that upset me? You know?" she asked me seriously, and I wasn't sure how to answer her question.

"Ehhh..." I stalled, my mind was blank.

"Lewis," she said with a bratty smile, "It's no biggie. We're more or less fuck buddies... he handles my physical needs, while I just wallow in tubs of ice cream and bags of Dorritos to meet my emotional needs," she said with a cute laugh.

This girl was certainly very different than most I know. In some ways she reminded me of a man, as in her outlook on relationships wasn't focused on cutesy and cliche moments... she was just really practical. I rubbed the back of my neck as I cleared my throat, what the hell was wrong with me? Is it weird that I found that sexy?

I noticed that our legs were still tangled together and we just kind of sat there in a comfortable silence, swinging our legs back and forth. Jetta was really something, I'm not sure what my feelings were toward her yet... but she was a spitfire... and I liked that.

We both jumped a little as my phone started buzzing on the counter, I grabbed it and noticed Eleanor was calling me again... what now?

I brought the iPhone to my ear as I smoke tentatively, "Yeah babe?"

I noticed an evil smirk on Jetta's face so I immediately became distracted from listening to whatever El was talking about. Instead, I was focusing in on Jetta's hand, which was once resting on my knee, as it began to inch up my thigh. I immediately tensed up as I felt myself getting excited, clearing my throat I spoke into the phone again, "What was that, El?" I asked her distractedly, watching Jetta scoot closer to me, wrapping her arms around my waist and laying her head on my shoulder.

I saw a smug grin playing at her lips as she realized the effect she was having on me, and walked her fingers up even higher on my thigh, until she was just inches away from my 'equipment.'

I took the phone away from my ear, and fighting a smile I mouthed, "STOP," to Jetta, but of course she wasn't about to listen. She drew her lips really close to my ear, so that the smooth flesh just barley brushed my skin, giving me goosebumps. I could tell Eleanor was becoming impatient with me, so I quickly snapped back to reality and hopped off the counter as I pointed my finger at her and narrowed my eyes.

She watched me walk around the counter as I made my way to the door, I turned around one last time to see her watching me; she pointed her finger at me and mouthed, "Talk to her!"

I nodded my head and watched her turn around to prance back into the living room where Harry and Liam were watching television. She first jumped into Liam's lap and then slid backwards so that she was laying in Harry's lap, with her feet still resting on Liam's. I felt a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach begin to grow as I watched them easily flirt back and forth. Harry picked up a strand of her hair and pushed it behind her ear as he flashed his dimples her way. I gave one last longing look toward my friends and this strange, amazing, interesting girl, before exiting the room and dully listening to Eleanor ramble on about her day.

Maybe Jetta was doing things the right way after all... she certainly seemed to be a lot happier than I was. Eleanor was in the middle of talking about something when I cut her off mid sentence, "Hey, El... we need to talk about something..."

**Laim's P.O.V**

I laughed as Jetta came bounding towards me and braced myself for the impact as she jumped, landing in my lap, "Miss me?" she asked sweetly.

"Of course... you were gone for five... maybe ten minutes? I thought I was going to go mad if you didn't come back soon..." I teased her.

She crossed her arms over her chest and let out a huff of air as she pouted, "Whatever Liam, I didn't miss you either," she said sassily. I swear... she was like the girl version of Louis. I watched as she slid off of my lap and fell backwards, resting her head in Harry's lap as she looked up at him; he smiled down at her and began playing with her hair. I chuckled as my mind further compared her to Louis... she was so energetic and open... and opinionated. Now that I think of it... no wonder Harry seems to fancy her.

It was getting quite late as I checked my phone and rested my head on the back of the couch, I could feel my eyes just itching to close. I was almost about to pass out when I suddenly heard Jetta's sassy voice, "Make sure you use protection!"

When I opened my eyes and looked around in confusion, I saw Niall and a sleepy looking Channing stumbling toward his room.

"Have fun with that little threesome you got going on there!" Channing yelled back with a coy smile.

"Oh, we will! Right boys?" she teased as Niall and Channing hurried into the room.

I started chuckling at her remark and noticed that Harry's eyes flicked toward mine after Jetta's remark. Hopefully he doesn't reckon she's serious. Poor lad.

I patted Jetta's legs and then removed them from my lap so I could stand up, "Hey I'm gonna go to bed. You alright out here with this bloke, Jet?" I asked her as I pointed toward Harry.

He smirked as she nodded her head and I made my way down the hallway to climb into my awaiting sheets. Hopefully those two don't do anything they'll regret in the morning.

**Harry's P.O.V**

I watched Liam saunter down the hallway before bringing my attention back down to Jetta, her eyelids looked a bit heavy and her cheeks were pink, but aside from that she just seemed to be an endless bubble of energy.

I watched as her lips move as she spoke and noticed a little chip in the side of her tooth. The fact that her smile wasn't perfect gave her character which I found very intriguing. She startled me a bit when she reached her arms over her head and let out a little squeal as she stretched; I couldn't help my eyes from wondering to her midriff that was showing as the shirt rose up with her arms, I was drawn back to her accusing blue eyes when I heard her clear her throat. Oops.

"See something you like?" she asked playfully.

I looked at her for a moment as I tried to figure out if she was being serious or just trying to mess with me. I could tell she was still a little tipsy, so I'm sure that was helping her to loosen up. She sat up slightly to take a sip of the vodka she had mixed into a bottle of Mountain Dew earlier; after taking a healthy gulp, she held the bottle up to me, offering me a drink. I of course accepted and took a long chug of the harsh, citrusy beverage.

"Harry?" she questioned, her voice almost sounding far away, like she was lost in her thoughts.

"Yeah, Jet?' I replied as I put the bottle down and resumed playing with her long blond hair. It was much curlier toward the beginning of the night, but now, the curls were very loose and it was mostly straight. It was actually a really sexy look.

"Are you really a player like all the tabloids claim?" she asked simply. I almost started laughing at the bluntness of her question. She didn't seem worried, she just seemed honestly curious.

I cleared my throat lightly, "I don't think that I am... I won't say that I haven't had a lot of flings," I said as I scratched the back my neck before continuing, "But... I generally love people and try to just make everyone happy. You wouldn't believe how many people I've actually turned down because they only wanted the prestige of saying they slept with me..." I trailed off with a laugh as I glanced at Jetta's pointed expression.

"No! I'm serious... I do love women, and I have been with quite a few... but I think I've turned down far more... sometimes I feel like I'm the one being used..." I said softly. I wasn't trying to sound pitiful but I noticed that Jetta's eyes softened as I continued on, "Sometimes I'll try to get to know someone, but they always seem to want to push right ahead to the physical stuff, and sometimes I think it's just so they can brag about it... which I don't understand," I finished as I continued playing with her hair as she stared up at me from my lap.

She gently reached her hand out and softly brushed it against my cheek, "Harry... that has got to be the biggest load of shit I have ever heard," she said so seriously that I couldn't do anything but start laughing hysterically. I noticed her lips curve up slightly to form a small smile before she spoke again, "I'm just kidding... I think I know what you mean... but I won't feel sorry for you because I mean... come on. What man doesn't want to be used and objectified by women?" she asked with a wink.

I nodded my head at her, "True... but I hope someday I'll actually be able to get to know someone who wants to be with me... not 'Harry Styles from One Direction,'" I said mockingly. I tried to act like it didn't bother me, but the truth of the matter was that I didn't like the way I was portrayed in the media. I didn't like people to think poorly of my actions and decisions. I didn't even like that this girl sitting on my lap thought I was a womanizing playboy.

Jetta reached her arms up and locked them around my neck, hugging me to her as she spoke, "Harry, you'll find her! Just try a little bit harder to not be such a hoe..." she trailed off and winked at me.

I tried to remain surly and in a bad mood, but it seemed that when Jetta was around, that was impossible. She was always making me laugh... even when she was making fun of me... she still did it in such a kind-hearted way, that I found it hilarious.

I hugged her back for a second before she released me and feel back down to resting on my lap. My eyes wandered to the watch on my wrist and I noticed it was nearing 3 am. I stretched my arms up and stifled a yawn as I felt Jetta turn toward me and cuddle into my torso. Now normally, this would get me too excited to want to just fall asleep, but with Jetta... things just felt different. She was worth more than that.

I tucked her head against my stomach as I scooted down to get more comfortable on the couch, after all of my moving around, she ended up laying against my chest with my arms wrapped around her waist, and our feet tangled together. It felt like a really comfortable and friendly embrace... I wasn't really used to cuddling without things going further, but how things were going right now... it felt nice.

"Night Harry," her soft voice whispered into the dark living room, where only our soft breathing and the rustle of Jetta's feet could be heard. Apparently she always moved her feet back and forth, out of habit. I thought it was quite cute actually, it reminded me of a cat.

I pushed the hair back and placed a soft kiss on her forehead; before falling into the clutches of the dark night, I watched as her lips formed another small smile, and felt her hug me a little closer. My thoughts were dancing across my tired mind and all I kept coming back to was maybe Channing coming to the meet and greet was the best thing that could have happened to all of us.


	14. All Hail the Skittle Master

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall reads another letter; Jetta and Louis have a skittle fight and he throws her in a pool :)

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I felt the subtle rise and fall of a chest beneath my cheek... Which was odd since I couldn't even remember where I was. I felt incredibly disoriented. I peeked one eye open and took in my surroundings; looking down at my body, I immediately felt relieved that I was clothed, but then a little wary when I realized I was wearing someone else's clothes.

A soft rhythmic breathing was blowing against my cheek; my eyes slowly crept up toward the owner and I about choked when I saw who I was cuddled up against. Harry Styles... After a few moments of shock engulfed my mind, the fog cleared and I immediately remembered the events from the previous night. The memories of the concert, the twister game, joking with Louis... Talking with Harry.

I felt a small smile slip onto my lips as I looked up at the boy with the curly locks. His brow was slightly furrowed as he slept, it looked like it was scrunched up in concentration. I reached up and swept my finger along his brow, gently smoothing it out. His face immediately relaxed and he looked so young and peaceful.

I lay there, just watching this beautiful boy sleep. It was nice to just be able to look at him... To take in every detail. Photographs just don't do him justice. I was suddenly startled when I felt a chuckle rumble through his chest, vibrating against my hands which I just now realized were clutching his shirt rather tightly. I loosened my hold on him and gazed up into his smirking face. Although his eyes were still shut, he had a sly smirk etched across his lips.

For a second I thought I'd imagined his laugh, however I jumped once again as I heard his raspy voice flood my ears, "You know, Jetta... It's not polite to stare..." He said as he peeked one eye open. I was thankful for the darkness of the living room because I knew my cheeks would be burning. I'm not a fan of being caught oogling someone... While they sleep.

My attention was immediately drawn to the kitchen when I heard a loud bang and some Irish cursing floated out from around the corner.

Harry's gravelly voice rang out... Giving my body shivers and my ears a mini orgasm, " You alright in there, Ni?" He asked into the darkness.

We turned our heads waiting for a response and were met with a sheepish looking Niall, peeking his head out from around the corner, "Sorreh... Did I wake yeh?" He somewhat whispered.

I was about to dismiss his worry when Harry beat me to it, "No, actually, I was woken up by some strange woman fondling my face... But how did you sleep Niall?" He asked rather casually considering he just accused me of... Face-fondling. I swear. I want to punch him in the throat sometimes. Or the balls. Yeah... balls.

Harry's eyes wandered down to meet mine as he waited for Niall's response. My arm was still draped across his stomach so I took it upon myself to pinch his side. Pretty hard. He immediately jumped while whisper-screaming, "Shit!" I was giggling and would probably have fallen onto the floor had his arm not been wrapped around my waist.

Harry glared down at me before I felt his arm give way as well as my body slip off the couch. I landed with a grunt and a soft thud as I rolled over onto my back.

Harry reached his arms over his head, stretching obnoxiously, also causing his shirt to rise up. I figured this was my window of opportunity so I went ahead and pinched the bare skin on his other side.

I laughed as a yelp left his lips and he quickly gripped my wrist, holding it tightly in place. Before our fight could escalate any further, I heard soft munching from behind me, and as I peeked over my shoulder I saw Niall sitting on the coffee table munching on pretzels and giving us a funny smile.

I ripped my wrist from Harry's grasp and stood up to take a seat right on his stomach. He wasn't flexing so I was pleased to hear a groan as I moved around a little trying to get comfortable. I crossed my legs and propped them up on the coffee table next to Niall.

Harry let out a loud yawn, "What time is it anyway?" he whined as he covered his head with a throw pillow.

I reached my hand into my bra, digging for my phone, after sticking my tongue out at Niall who was giving me a funny look, I finally found it and pulled it out, searching the screen for the time, "5:34 am," I answered.

"And we're awake because...?" Harry's muffled voice asked snappily from beneath the pillow.

I wasn't really listening to him though because I was more amazed with the fact that I had been asleep for almost three hours. It felt good. Normally I don't go more than two hours at a time without waking.

"Umm... wow," I mumbled to myself.

"You alright?" Niall asked me absentmindedly as he dug into his bag for more pretzels.

I shook my head slightly, "It's nothing... I just slept for like three hours though... normally I never go more than two," I said as I continued clicking through my phone, logging onto twitter.

I felt a pillow smack me on the shoulder, "Wait, what?" I heard Harry's confused voice mumble.

"Oh... I don't know... I have like insomnia. I don't really sleep much," I answered nonchalantly.

"How on earth do you survive on two hours of sleep a night?" Harry questioned me, sounding serious.

I looked his way and sent him a wink, "Well thanks to you, I just got three hours," I said with a goofy smile.

Harry didn't smile though, in fact he looked slightly concerned, "Jet... that's not healthy," he stated as he placed the pillow back behind his head and stared up at me since I was still perched on his stomach.

"Yeah... Can't people die frum lack a sleep?" Niall questioned no one in particular.

I shrugged my shoulders and rested my back against the couch as I continued playing on my phone, "I don't know... I've always had problems with sleeping. It got really bad when I was around ten... and I've seen doctors and taken medication, but my brain just never seems to shut off..." I trailed off, losing interest in the topic. I didn't like to discuss my insomnia.

Harry poked me in the ribs and gave me a sly smile, "Maybe tonight I'll help you sleep four hours!" he said suggestively as he winked.

I laughed and smacked his hand away, "Getting a little ahead of ourselves, arne't we?" I asked him with a smile.

"No I'm just offering my services up to you... I mean, I must be really comfortable," he reasoned.

I scoffed lightly, "No... it's probably just because you're so boring," I said bluntly. I looked at him and saw his lips form into a perfect pout.

Niall laughed heartily at our banter, before reaching over and pinching Harry's cheek, "Awee, it's okay, Haz," he cooed playfully.

Harry continued pouting and even attempted to roll over so that he was facing the couch, which of course caused me to fall and get wedged between his body and the back of the couch.

I reached out toward Niall, hoping he'd take my hand and pull me free, but he just continued laughing at us as he stood up and wandered back toward his closed door, "I''ll go 'head an' leave you guys to it," he said as he walked away.

I cursed the Irish dork for not helping me out of my predicament, as I turned my attention toward Harry who was pretending to be asleep. After trying to kick my feet to free myself, I eventually got tired and decided to stop fighting. Reluctantly, I slid sideways so that I was somehow squished up against the couch, now lying in front of Harry. He readjusted himself, taking on the role of the big spoon.

After a few minutes of staring at the side of the couch and studying the intricate patterns stitched into the fabric, I felt his warm hand close around mine followed shortly by his cool breath on the nape of my neck. I decided I was just going to close my eyes for a few minutes, but after a few seconds of staring at the back of my dark eyelids, all traces of conscious thought left my mind as I was once again lulled to sleep by Harry's rhythmic breathing and steady heartbeat. I had to admit... he was just damn comfortable.

**Niall's P.O.V**

After leaving Harry and Jetta to get back to whatever they were doing, I reentered my cool room and looked at the body lying in my bed, tangled up in the mass of blankets. She had a small smile stretched across her lips and I smiled at the view. She really was beautiful. One of her hands was outstretched over her head and since the bracelets were pushed down to her forearm, it gave me a clear view of her wrist. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach as I eyes wandered over the tattered markings. I hated it. It made me so mad... but I wasn't mad at her. I was mad at her step father.

After filling my creep quota for the night and watching her sleep for a few more minutes, I quietly tried to open the night stand drawer, and gently pulled out Channing's stack of letters. It had been a few days since I read one, so I decided I'd try and kill some time. Little did I know, I could have gone my entire life without reading that letter.

_"April 29th, 2013_

_Dear Niall,_

_It's really strange. That feeling of calm I feel after I've cut myself. I sincerely hope it's something you never experience... but for me, it's like a high. Everything is perfect in my world for just a minute.. and usually that night I'm able to sleep rather peacefully. I just find it strange how something so terrible... so evil... can feel so good. I'm sorry Niall, every time I've promised you I would stopped cutting... I've been nothing but a liar. I'm not sure I ever intended to stop anyway. They were just words I was using to make myself feel better. I miss you. And here I am feeling stupid... because how can I miss someone I've never met?_

_I honestly don't know why I continue on with this. Why I waste my time. Why I waste yours. I honestly don't even know why I waste perfectly good oxygen by breathing. Maybe I should just end it. He's not going to stop using me. He never will. It's happened twice now. In my last letter I was rather vague. I didn't want to rehash the terrible encounter... but tonight I can't help but think of anything else. I have no one. I'm still bruised and bleeding. I think I have a concussion. My life is caving in on me and I just don't feel like fighting anymore. Tell me, how am I supposed to seize this day, when everything inside of me has died? This world is nothing that I expected... My mind tries to tell me that 'everything will be alright'... but Niall, I just don't think I'm going to be okay._

_Two months ago Jeff came into my room while I was sleeping... I forgot to prop the chair against the door to keep him out. I sometimes wonder if I would have remembered to do that... would I be where I am right now? Would I feel so hopeless? Well no matter... what's done is done. He ripped me from my bed and dragged me down the stairs. I was so disoriented, I had no idea what was going on. The next thing I knew, Jeff was throwing me into our spare bedroom and slamming the door in my face. I was stunned, I didn't know what time it was... I didn't know what was going on. I began banging on the door. Now that I think about it, I should have just tried to climb out the window. Why was I so STUPID?_

_After a few minutes of my incessant banging, the door opened and a man I had never met in my life entered. He didn't look too much older than me, so I wasn't too worried at first. That's until I heard Jeff holler at him from the living room, "You got 20 minutes!"_

_The man was probably in his mid twenties and he smelled of alcohol and smoke. The smell of him alone was making my eyes water and my lungs burn... I began to back away, and he slowly approached me like a lion would approach their prey. Before I knew what was happening, I was backed up against the corner and his disgusting mouth was covering mine, while his rough hand wrapped around my throat. "Don't fight it." That's the only thing he said to me. DON'T FIGHT IT. Don't FUCKING fight it. Those were his words of wisdom he felt necessary to tell me before throwing me on the bed. I'll leave it at that because I think you can imagine what happened._

_When he was finally finished with me, my throat was burning from my screaming and crying. I could barely stand. I lay there in my ripped up pajamas, gasping for breath as he climbed off of me and left the room without another word. Niall it hurt. Everything hurt. It hurt to merely breath. At that moment, I wanted to die. I wanted to disappear. "_

As I stopped reading for a moment to get control of myself, I looked down at my hands to see that I was literally crushing the letter, as well as all of the other letters that had been sitting in my hands. I quickly released them and smoothed out the paper. I felt an ache in my chest... a horrible pain that I had no idea how to get rid of.

In that moment, I could actually feel the pain in my chest. Merely from reading that tear soaked letter, I could literally feel my heart breaking. I thought her other letters were bad, but this was just torture. I couldn't handle it... I began pacing and I didn't know what to do with myself.

I looked again at this girl. This stranger, some might say... but to me, she really wasn't. I knew her so well. I knew her past. Through these letters I got a front row seat to all of her uncensored thoughts. I couldn't think of a better way to get to know someone. I watched her as she lay sleeping with a smile on her face, curled up into a little ball... wearing my clothes... hugging my pillow. Last week I had no idea who she was. I had no clue about her struggles. Last week I had it easy. But not now... now I felt more emotions in the past few days regarding the opposite sex then I think I had my entire life. The funny thing is... I don't regret it. I don't regret any of it. Meeting her, searching for her, finding her. I don't regret a single thing. I walked back over toward the corner of the room and sat down quietly on the lounge chair again, after taking a few deep breaths, I brought my shaking hands containing the letter back up to my face and continued reading;

_"That was the first time Niall. The first time was the worst... because I was still pure. I still had that fight inside of me. That hope that in the end, I would be saved... I would be okay. This time however... I'm even more ashamed of myself. I didn't even try to fight him off. It was the same man that hurt me the first time. I've been sooo sooo careful... I try to never be in the house with my stepfather at the same time... but he caught me today. He rushed me right when I stepped in the front door._

_I looked at the coffee table to see it loaded with cocaine and then that same man was standing in the corner, with a cold look in his eyes. As soon as I saw his face, I think I died a little. Every ounce of spirit I had hanging on by a thread got completely severed. Jeff grabbed me by the throat and threw me to the man. He said the same thing he said the first time, "You've got twenty minutes." I didn't even have the strength to cry. It was like that horrible pain you get in your throat when you're trying so hard not to cry... that's all I felt. But no tears were shed. The man said one thing to me this time as well, "You're learning. It's easier this way." I just stared at him blankly with dead eyes as he took even more pieces of my body... my dignity... my soul. It was like I wasn't even there. I was numb. I'm still numb. I don't know if I'll ever be able to feel anything ever again. I could't even ease my mind by thinking of you... because I felt nothing but shame. Usually my mind goes to you when I am in a bad situation... but not during this. I found myself focus on anything... and everything besides your blue eyes and smiling face._

_Niall, I think I'm going to sleep. Sleeping is nice... you get to forget about everything for a while. Maybe I'll sleep forever. I've cut myself deeply tonight. I told Jetta not to worry about me. She still doesn't know much about my situation, but I told her I would be fine... she believes me. It's too bad you're the only one who knows I lied. The blood has yet to stop flowing, and I think I might be dreaming right now. I don't even know if I'm still writing you or imagining it. I don't know if I'll be writing you again. I'm so scared I'll be alone forever. Who could love a girl with more scars than friends? More razors than confidence? More pain than beauty? Exactly. No one. Goodbye Niall. Be happy... do it for me._

_Love, Channing."_

I reread her signature repeatedly, "Love, Channing... Love, Channing... Love, Channing," after a few minutes, I was finally able to rip my eyes away from the worst thing I had ever read. I literally crumbled it up and chucked it across the room. It was no denying it, I was a mess. I was hurting... for myself... for her. Why her? Why did she deserve that? As the words she wrote began swarming around my brain, I tried desperately to forget it. All of it. Everything. I couldn't handle this. My eyes were stinging, and I felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to help her. My senses were alert, for some reason, I felt like she was in danger... even though she was here with me. Safe as can be... cuddled in my blankets. My mind wouldn't hear of it. My mind kept thinking she was back in April, scared and vulnerable... needing my help. I ran my hands through my hair, trying to calm myself down. She tried to kill herself... oh my God.

I crawled onto the bed and scooped her into my arms, I didn't try to be gentle or quiet. I brought her fragile body into my lap and held her to me as I rocked us back and forth. Her sleepy eyes shot open and became wide and scared as she took in my frazzled appearance and demeanor.

"Niall, what is it?" she asked worriedly.

I looked at her. I stared into her grey eyes and felt a tear begin to slid down my cheek. She spotted the tear as well and became even more alert as she cradled my face in her hands, "Niall, oh my God... what's wrong?" she asked urgently, her voice becoming thick with emotion as well.

"I--I'm sorry," I spoke slowly, trying not to break down. "I'm so sorry..." I whispered again as I cupped her cheek with my shaking hand. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to get control over my emotions.

I felt my breath hitch and she hugged me tightly and buried her face into my neck as a few more tears slid down my face and landed in her hair. I felt incredibly selfish. I didn't mean for her to be comforting me... but that's the kind of person she was. Always giving. Always consoling.

I pulled her face up to meet mine, "I won't let anyone hurt yeh again," I said in such a serious tone of voice, I even surprised myself. Her shining eyes grew wider and she began blinking rapidly, trying to hold back the tears.

I rubbed her back gently as she crawled into my lap, wrapping her arms around my waist. I had to know if she had really tried to end it, "Channing... I just read your letter from April... what did you do?" I asked in a shaky whisper.

She froze for a second once she realized the time I was referring to, before she looked down in shame, nervously twisting the bracelets on her wrists. After a moment of silence she took my hand and helped me trace a long scar that began at her wrist and traveled all the way down her forearm. It was a very long scar... I was surprised that I'd never noticed it before. Then I realized I never noticed, because I was never looking for it. I just saw those small slashes on her lower wrists and figured those were the worst of it. Those bracelets on her wrists hid this scar well.

"That's the only time I've ever cut like that," she said in a small voice, "There was so much blood... I remember writing the letter and then curling up on my bathroom floor... I think I fell asleep," she continued, looking thoughtful as she remembered that day.

"I really don't know what happened. All I know.. is that Jetta saved me. She found me, surrounded in my own blood. I still feel terrible to this day that she had to see that," she said as she sniffled softly, and wiped a few stray tears from her eyes. I pressed my lips to her forehead, holding them there much longer than necessary. I just wanted to hold her... to love her. To turn her life around.

Channing met my eyes reluctantly as she explained further, "After that, I told Jetta everything that was happening. The abuse, the cutting... " she trailed off with a sob. I hugged her close to me, encouraging her to continue, "She took me to one of those special clinics... you know like planned parenthood, " she said sounding embarrassed.

I nodded my head and searched her eyes, she had no reason to feel embarrassed, "I got checked out and... tested," she whispered even more softly against my throat as she hugged me again. I continued stroking the back of her head as she released more silent tears onto my shoulder.

"Everything came back normal, and the women was so kind to me. I think she knew something was wrong, but she was professional and didn't pry too deeply for answers," she finished softly.

I gave her a small smile and started playing with a strand of her dark hair, twisting and untwisting it around my finger, " I'm happy yer alright.. readin' that letter... it was hard, ya know?" I asked uncertainly.

I closed my eyes as I drew her close once more, tucking her head under my chin. I could feel the wetness on my cheeks from my wet lashes. I wasn't even embarrassed from crying in front of her, that's what was so amazing about her. Here I was... at my lowest point... and Channing still made me feel strong even when I was at my weakest.

I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as I pulled her close to whisper against her temple, "No one will ever touch you. Channing... no one. I won't let that happen again," I promised as I stroked her moist cheek.

She gave me a grateful look, but I could see a sense of doubt in her eyes, "Niall, right now... I'm happy, OK? Let's just enjoy it. You probably don't have too much longer in St. Louis, do you?" she asked sadly.

I thought for a second as I counted the dates in my head... I figured we had about ten days left until we had to move on to Tulsa. I felt an immediate sense of dread wash through me just thinking about having to leave her.

"Ten days..." I mumbled softly, pulling her even closer. I just wanted to put her in my pocket and take her wherever I had to go.

She gave me a sad smile, "No matter what happens... just know you've changed my life... do- don't forget about me..." she whispered solemnly.

I placed my fingers under her chin so that she'd meet my eyes, "Chan... if yeh think after ev'rything that's happened over tha last few days... that'd I'd jus ferget about yah... then yer crazy." I said as I held her face in my hands.

She nodded her head and began sliding down so that she was laying on her side, and I slid down too, so that I was hugging her from behind.

Her soft voice pulled me out of the sleepy haze that I was falling into, "I wish that we could stay like this Niall. I just wish that life was easy like that... you know?" she asked as I found her hand and intertwined our fingers.

I didn't respond for a few minutes as I thought of what to say, "Maybe we can," I replied gently as I turned her over so that she was facing me. We lay there in comfortable silence; our hands clasped together, her forehead resting against mine, and I could feel her heartbeat against my chest.

As our eyes grew heavy and our breathing in sync, I decided that I was just going to take it as it comes. Life isn't always fair... but I'm going to take the moment while it's here... and I silently prayed that we would have many more perfect moments, such as this one.

**Channing's P.O.V**

I was warm, and wrapped around something... or someone. I peeked one eye open and was pleasantly surprised to see a blondish-brown mop of hair resting right in front of me. I had my hands laying flat against Niall's bare chest, and I took a moment to appreciate his broad shoulders and toned arms. His soft breath tickled my cheek as I watched him. His eyes were moving around under his eyelids, so I felt a large smile sneak upon my face as I realized he was dreaming.

I gently stroked my fingers up and down his arm. After a few minutes of lightly brushing my fingertips against his skin, he had yet to pry his eyes open. I pulled my hand away for a moment to tuck my hair behind my ear, as I did so, I felt the vibration of his chest as he spoke up, "Hey don't stop... I liked that," he said with a small smile, his eyes were still closed. I giggled softly at his cuteness and resumed trailing my fingers up and down his arm. After another few minutes, I could feel goosebumps raising on his arms, and he shivered slightly.

Suddenly, he leaned forward, burying his face in the crook of my neck, taking in a deep breath. After releasing a slight moan against my collar bone I heard him whisper, "God, you smell good."

I smiled and even laughed a little as I rested my cheek against the back of his head, "You do too," I whispered back. I began tracing my fingers along the nape of his neck, and he immediately began shivering.

He pulled his head away from me to look me in the eyes, "I could really get used to waking up like this," he said with a crooked smile. My heart fluttered in my chest as he began leaning toward me, I met him halfway, locking my lips around his.

"I feel like I can't breathe when I'm around you, Channing," he whispered against my lips, without breaking the kiss. I felt my cheeks redden and we rolled so that he was hovering over me. He held himself up and I watched the muscles in his arms flex as he held up his own weight. We had yet to break the kiss, but he finally released my swollen lips and slowly trailed kisses down my neck.

I ran my hands down his muscular back and trailed my nails lightly down his spine as he continued leaving me love bites down my neck and back up the other side. My eyes were closed as I released small moans against his shoulder; he worked his way back over to my lips, capturing them once more.

After a few more minutes of intense kissing, I heard a soft groan escape Niall's lips as he pulled away, resting his forehead against mine again, "We should stop before I get carried away," he whispered and quickly kissed my nose before rolling over onto his back.

We played around for a few minutes, just talking and joking; I was startled though when someone just barged right into the room. I looked up to see the mischievous blue eyes of Louis.

"Are you two going to lie in bed all day... or?" he trailed off as he crossed his arms over his chest and tapped his foot.

"Aye, maybe... what time is it, Louis?" Niall asked as he stretched his arms over his head.

"Almost 3pm," Lou said, sounding emotionless.

"Seriously?" I asked. I can't believe we've been asleep that long. In all honesty though, Niall was so warm and comfortable, I wouldn't mind going back to bed...

Reluctantly, we untangled ourselves from one another and shuffled out of the room, following after Louis.

As we entered the living room, we were greeted with multiple pairs of eyes examining our appearance, Jetta jumped up from her chair and hugged me around the neck, "You're alive!" she said excitedly, "I sent Louis in to get you because these wankers are sooo boring," she said dramatically as she yawned.

The other boys just snickered, but Louis came up behind her and quickly tossed her over his shoulder, "I'll show you boring!" he said in a teasing voice as he ran down the hall. I laughed as I watched Jetta giggling and smacking his ass repeatedly as they walked away, slipping out the front door. The smile remained on my face as I thought of how well she seemed to have clicked with all of the boys. That's Jetta for you though... everyone always loves her.

"Yah hungry?" Niall asked me as he wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder. I didn't mind the contact... I actually really enjoyed it. In the back of my mind, however, I wondered if this meant we were together. I decided not to dwell on it. I was happy at the moment... I didn't feel like I needed a label to describe our relationship.

I nodded my head excitedly just as my stomach growled. Niall chuckled and I blushed slightly, "C'mon love," Niall whispered as he pulled me away toward the kitchen. I felt a warm feeling in my stomach, as I realized he wasn't just using a pet name. I felt like when he called me 'love'... he actually meant it.

**Louis' P.O.V**

When I entered Liam and Niall's room this morning, I was a little surprised to see Jetta and Harry cuddling on the couch. For some reason it just put an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. So, I of course, did the only rational thing I could think of; I stood next to the couch and leaped on top of them (trying to make sure most of my weight fell on top of Harry.)

I was rewarded with a loud yelp from Harry and a little squeal from Jetta. I rolled off of them onto the floor as they woke up. After I composed myself, I sat on the coffee table, facing them, "So what's going on here?" I asked in a suspicious voice.

"Oh nuthin really... I'm just an insomniac and Princess Kitty Paw's is so boring... he puts me to sleep so easily. Lewis... it's fantastic," she answered dryly, "How did your night go?" she inquired with a wink.

I merely shrugged my shoulders, I didn't really feel like explaining my long conversation with Eleanor at the moment.

I waited for Harry to move his legs out of the way, then tousled Jetta's messy hair as I plopped down next to her. She smacked my hand away as she yawned loudly with her hand over her mouth, "What time is it?"

"Almost noon," Zayn answered over from the same recliner he had fallen asleep in last night... has he moved from that spot at all since then? I chuckled as I leaned my back against the couch and began staring at the ceiling, "What should we do today?" I asked everyone, of course no one answered.

After a few minutes though, Jetta turned toward me, crossing her legs on the couch Indian-style, "Do you guys have a concert tonight?" she asked as I turned and faced her, sitting Indian-style as well. She was so child-like... and I loved that.

"Nope!" Liam yelled from the kitchen, "we're off today," he said as he came around the corner, a piece of toast with nutella spread hanging out of his mouth.

Jetta clapped her hands in excitement, "OK, Louis... let's pick a scary movie!" she said excitedly as she jumped up from the couch, tugging on my arm. I happily complied and followed her over to our little movie pile that was near the television. We rummaged around through the DVDs for a few minutes before finally deciding on something called Cabin Fever. I had no idea where this movie even came from, but she insisted we watch it because the main character was the guy that played Shawn on Boy Meets World... whatever the hell that was.

Liam ordered us some room service so, after collecting our snacks, Jetta and I spread out on the floor in front of the T.V, while Zayn and Liam took the chairs, and Harry hogged the sofa all to himself. When I looked over my shoulder, I realized he was sleeping again. I rolled my eyes and focused back on Jetta who was kneeling over in front of the T.V as she hit the play button. She shoved some licorice in her mouth and lay on her stomach next to where I was sitting.

My mind was swirling with foreign emotions as I watched her shirt ride up when she stretched her arms out to reach for the remote. Her toned, muscular back was quite a distraction, and I was only pulled out of my lustful thoughts as I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and met Liam's brown, accusing eyes. He rose an eyebrow at me, but I saw a small smile tug at his lips as he also tried to refrain from checking out Jetta's backside.

I lay down on my stomach right next to her and tried to get comfortable; after the movie had been on for about twenty minutes, Jetta and I were doing anything besides paying attention. Liam and Zayn kept shushing us and throwing popcorn at our heads.

"You're up," Jetta whispered as she crawled up extremely close to my face, then scooted away again, opening her mouth, waiting for my throw. We had been playing a sort of skittle in the mouth basketball game... somehow at the moment, she was winning.

We were about three feet apart and I positioned my arm to aim for her open mouth. As I released the green skittle it went flying the short distance, missing the target, and instead,  nailing her in the nose.

Jetta snorted loudly as she grabbed the discarded skittle and popped it into her mouth, "Lewis... your aim is dreadful!" she quipped as she aimed a yellow skittle perfectly and I felt it sail right into my mouth. I chewed slowly before pouting, "Show me your ways, oh skittle master!" I said dramatically as I stuck my tongue out at her. She threw a piece of licorice at me.

"It's all in the wrist!" she explained as she aimed and tossed another skittle toward my mouth. Of course, it would have gone in, but I closed my mouth at the last minute, so it bounced off my lips and slid back toward her.

"Oh you did not just ruin my streak! I was on a roll!" she said angrily as she picked the skittle up and crawled toward me. I could see that this wasn't going to end well, so I clamped my mouth shut and covered it with my hands.

"Oh no you don't!" she laughed as she climbed on top of me. One by one, she pried my hands away from my mouth and began trying to tickle and poke me, trying to get me to open up my mouth so she could throw the skittle inside. Jesus Christ... note to self, this girl is COMPETITIVE.

After giving up on the tickling, she resorted to actually using her hands to push the pressure points in my cheeks, causing my jaw to open slightly. How does she know about these weird things? I began laughing though, because every time she tried to throw the skittle in, I blocked my mouth off again.

After a few more failed attempts, she groaned in frustration. For a moment she just sat there staring at me, but then I saw a little spark in her eye, and I assumed it was a new idea forming in her twisted brain. I watched as she took the skittle and placed it in between her teeth, and leaned over my face. She took my arms and locked them under her strong legs, at this point she was sitting up very high on my chest.

She leaned forward and hovered over my face, I decided to play with her a little. I would open my mouth for a few seconds but as soon as she would lean over to drop the skittle in, I'd immediately close my mouth. We went back and forth like this for a little while, that is until she got bored with me and crawled out of her sitting position. She was now hovering over me, on her hands and knees; I just gave her a perplexed look and wasn't sure what she was up to now. However, I was immediately greeted with her knee pressing up against my crotch. My mouth unintentionally opened into an O shape when I realized this girl had no limitations when it came to winning.

I didn't even notice when she leaned over and dropped the skittle from in between her teeth into my still open mouth. I slowly closed my mouth, chewing slowly, and continued to just stare up at her triumphant smile. I cleared my throat as I glanced toward Liam and Zayn, noticing they were both still really focused on the movie. My eyes wandered to where Harry was laying and I found that he was still curled into the couch, snoring softly. Jetta winked at me before lightly kissing my cheek and rolling off of me so that she was resting on her back as well.

"You don't like to lose, do ya?" I chuckled as I stared up at the ceiling. "Pfft... I never lose," Jetta replied simply. I looked at my phone and realized it was already after 2:30pm. Jetta noticed the time as well and looked over toward Niall's still closed door.

"Can you go wake them up?" she whispered. I felt a chill pass through me as her hot breath crept across my cheek. She gave me a pleading smile and puppy dog eyes.

I raised my eyebrows up and down suggestively, "You sure that's all they're doing in there?" I teased. Jetta rolled her eyes and slapped my shoulder. Laughing, I reluctantly got to my feet, hurriedly bursting into Nialler's room. Thankfully they were just staring at each other lovingly, fully clothed. Well, aside from Niall's naked torso... but that's normal.

After dragging Niall and Channing from the room, I heard Jetta whine that we were boring her. My ass! I'm Louis the Tommo Tomlinson! Boring isn't even in my vocabulary.

 "I'll show you boring," I said tauntingly as I threw her over my shoulder and hurried down the hallway. I began laughing as she boldly started to smack my ass. She's not one for subtlety.

I made my way to the front door and swiftly slipped out, hurrying down the hall, Jetta was still wiggling in my grasp, so I dug my hands into her sides trying to keep a good hold on her. Her shirt had begun to rise up so I was now actually gripping tightly onto her hips, not that I was complaining about that. I carried her to the elevator and threw her inside, trying to give my shoulder a little break. She immediately tried to fight me off now that she was free, but as soon as we reached the ground floor, I quickly scooped her up and ran toward my final destination. The indoor pool.

I smirked evilly at her as the smell of chlorine wafted into my nose, and the humid pool deck immediately made me feel hot and muggy. I approached the side of the pool that was about ten feet deep. I held Jetta bridal style over the pool as I winked at her. "How's this for boring?" I taunted her, "Have a nice swim!"

As soon as I released Jetta, I almost smiled triumphantly; that was until I felt her strong unrelenting grip on my forearm, and I found myself tumbling in right after her.

**Jetta P.O.V**

Once I realized where Louis was dragging me, I immediately began forming a plan in my mind. Either way, I knew I was going to end up in that pool...  and by God, I was going to make sure he did too. When we got to the edge, I don't think Louis anticipated my move to pull him in with me, because his face was of complete shock as we fell together into the lapping waters full of chlorine and only God knows what else.

We sank to the bottom and pushed off the pool floor, breaking the surface together and laughing hysterically at one another. He pulled my over to the edge so that I could get a good grip on the concrete wall.

I turned toward Louis and smiled as I looked him over in all of his wet glory. His white t-shirt was sticking to his skin and his hair was messily splayed to the side of his head. I won't lie... he looked damn good when he was wet. His long lashes were wet and looked even longer than usual; seriously, why does this guy have to be prettier than have of the girls I've ever met. He's probably even prettier than me.

We laughed for a few more seconds, clinging to the side of the pool as we tried to catch our breath; I noticed we'd drifted closer together. His eyes were sparkling as he searched my face. He must have found what he was looking for because he slowly leaned in. When we were mere inches apart, any hope of what he had been planning to do was lost, because we heard yelling coming from the other side of the pool, "HEY! YOU KIDS GET OUT OF THERE! YOU CAN'T WEAR REGULAR CLOTHES IN THE POOL! SUITS ONLY!" the chubby guy yelled at us as he spoke with a rather muscular lifeguard who was standing next to him. What a little snark... he probably ran and told on us.

Both Louis and I burst out in laughter as we clambered out of the pool, he made it out first and turned to help pull me out as well. We stood there giggling at one another, looking at our soaked appearances.

"I feel like a soggy rat," I commented as we began walking back out toward the lobby. Louis' shoes were making squishing noises because of the water in them, where as I was barefoot so you could just hear my feet slapping against the ground. I looked over at Louis as he spoke, "Well, trust me, you don't look like one," he replied with a smirk as he shook his head, spraying me with a few water droplets. I checked him out as my eyes traveled over the white v-neck that was clinging to him like a second layer or skin. He caught me looking, so I immediately felt heat gather in my cheeks as well as other unmentionable places. I cleared my throat as we neared the elevator; we were getting a lot of strange stares from other hotel guests. What? Have these people never seen a person wearing wet clothes before?

Before I could dwell any further, the elevator dinged open and we entered the shaft. We were kind of in a comfortable silence as we ascended to the twelfth floor. I began shivering slightly as we approached the hotel room; I was reaching for the handle when Louis suddenly grabbed my hand, tugging me across the hallway. I gave him a questioning look as he unlocked his hotel room door, "C'mon, I'll get you some dry clothes," he said as he motioned for me to enter first. Wow what a gentleman... first he throws me into a pool, then he opens the door for me. I wonder what he'll surprise me with next. I felt a little thrill bounce around in my stomach as my nerves coiled up in anticipation.


	15. I Didn't Choose the Fangirl Life, the Fangirl Life Chose Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall, Jetta, Harry and Chan take a trip to get the girls' things... when they get to Channing's house... Jeff makes an appearance

**Channing's P.O.V**  
The rest of the day we planned on just snacking on junk food and watching movies. As we put White Chicks into the DVD player, the door creaked open and a sheepish looking Jetta walked in followed by Louis. Three things stood out to me... They'd been gone for about three hours, Jetta's hair was damp and she was wearing different clothes.   
Louis and Jetta parted ways, Lou walked over toward Harry and Zayn while Jetta hurried over to me.   
I was sitting on the couch, Niall's arm was draped loosely over my shoulder as Jetta crept over and plopped down next to me.

"I need to talk to you," she whispered through her teeth, not moving her lips. I started laughing a little bit as I answered her, doing the same thing, "Ok, what's up?" I asked her softly. She grabbed my hand and began trying to pull me away from Niall, who, by the way, did not approve of the separation anymore than I did. Niall gave me a questioning look, but I gave him a light kiss on the cheek and saw a small smile slip across his lips as Jetta dragged me back toward Niall's room. I winced as her nails dug into my palm and I ripped my hand away from hers, "Jet! What is the problem?" I asked loudly, rubbing my hand against my thigh.

She threw herself back onto Niall's bed and patted the bed for me to lay down next to her, "Nothing, I just haven't gotten to speak to my best friend in a while. A certain evil leprechaun keeps hogging the shit out of her..." she trailed off with a pout.

I rolled my eyes and relaxed on the bed next to her; I was laying on Niall's pillow so I was in heaven as his scent surrounded me. Shit... focus Channing.

Jetta gave me a funny look and started laughing, "What?" I asked her.

"Nothing... you're just sitting there having a nosegasm. I can totally tell! I don't blame you though... Niall smells good..." she trailed off as she leaned closer to his pillow and took a big wiff.

"Mmmmm," she mumbled as she closed her eyes and fell back on the other side of the bed. I began laughing so hard my stomach was hurting, "Oh my God... Jetta why are we so creepy?" I asked her through my giggling.

"I didn't choose the fangirl life. The fangirl life chose me. We can't simply turn off our stalkerish ways at the drop of a hat, ya know," she reasoned, as if what she was saying made total sense.

We settled down as she rolled over to face me again, "I think he's good for you, Chan. Look at you. You're glowing. I love you like this. I haven't seen you stop smiling since last night," she said as she pulled me closer giving me a hug.

My cheeks warmed as I agreed with her, since she hadn't seen the few times I'd broken down in front of Niall within the last 24 hours. God... would I ever get over that embarrassment?

"How did we get so lucky?" I asked absentmindedly. We sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before I remembered that she was wearing new clothes, "Hey Jet... why are you dripping and wearing Louis' clothes?" I asked as I inspected her facial expression and tugged on her striped shirt.

She rolled her eyes and smiled, "Because that jackass threw me in the pool!" she exclaimed excitedly, "so I grabbed a hold of him and made him come with me," she said with a wink.

"Oooh... sounds kinky," I said with a laugh.

"Yeah well then when we got back up here he offered me some of his clothes," she said quickly as she rolled over to stare up at the ceiling.

I watched her as she began biting her bottom lip, something she does when she's nervous or excited, "What are you not telling me?" I accused as I crossed my arms over my chest.

Jetta squeezed her eyes shut and covered her face with her hands as I scooted closer and attempted to pry them off. Her cheeks were extremely red as I finally got them off and she had a gleam in her eye as she flashed me a wide smile.

She bit her lip slightly, "I... I think there might be something between me and Lou," she mumbled, sounding embarrassed. "While I was in his room... he um... we... it wasn't anything big... it was almost like a small...." she was stuttering and not making any sense so I helped her out.

"Oh my GOD! Did Louis kiss you? Did you kiss Louis? Are you in love? Are you gonna have little mini sassmasta's??" I asked her with my hands over my mouth to keep the scream that was threatening to fly out of my mouth.

Her cheeks grew even redder and she quickly responded, "It was nothing! It was like a heat of the moment peck. That's all!" she tried to convince me, but her adorably giddy smile led me to believe it meant more to her than a friendly peck.

I smiled for a second, but then it faltered as I remembered something, "What about Eleanor?" I asked her softly. The smile left her face as well and I felt a little bit of guilt nagging at me.

"I know... he's with Eleanor... but there's something there..." she trailed off with a shrug of her shoulders. Which reminded my of something else as well, "Well... you and Harold were looking quite snug last night... what's up with that?" I asked with a smirk.

The red returned to her cheeks once more as she sighed, "Ughh... Channing... why am I such an emotional hoebag?" she asked me seriously, causing me to snort. We were both giggling as we heard the door creak open and Niall peeked his head in, smiling at us.

"Ev'rythin' OK in here?" he asked sweetly, we nodded our heads and tried to compose ourselves.

He gave me the cutest look before continuing, "Tha lads were 'bout ta order a pizza. Any special requests?" he questioned as he came the rest of the way into the room and sat down at the foot of the bed, grabbing my legs and resting them on his lap.

Jetta scoffed, "You guys are so cute. Brb, imma go play in traffic," she said as she hopped up from the bed and started toward the door. Niall gave me a questioning look, and Jetta noticed his confision as well, "Sorry Nialler... um... that's just fangirl speak for 'You guys are so cute I need to remove myself from the situation because I can't handle it'," she said as she dramatically clutched at her chest.

"Oh... right," Niall laughed and looked at me, "Jetta, here's been teachin' meh tha fangirl language," he said with a goofy grin as she stuck her tongue out at him and left the room.

Niall climbed up on the bed to take Jetta's place next to me, "Hey, ya stole mah pillow," he whined as he slipped his hands around my waist and kissed my nose.

"Well, I couldn't help myself... it smells like you," I said as I buried my face into his chest. I felt the vibrations from his chest as he chuckled at my statement.

"Well can't argue with that... I'll jus' keep this one since it smells like yeh," he joked as he released me, grabbed my pillow and hugged it to him as he rolled back and forth on the bed.

We laughed for a few more minutes as we wrestled around, and now we were just relaxing in each other's company. I looked up at him as he began to speak, "Is it odd that I've had more fun in tha last  few days, then I've had for most a tha tour?" he asked.

I blushed slightly at his implications, before rolling my eyes, "You must have a pretty warped sense of fun... I mean I've been making you deal with all of my emotional break downs..." I trailed off as I stared at a spot on the wall, rather than looking into his eyes.

He moved his head so that he was covering said spot on the wall, and lured my eyes right into his own, "Hey, I'm bein' serious... even tha hard stuff. I've loved ev'ry minute of it," he whispered against my lips. It was quite a teasing sensation. We weren't kissing... but his lips kept barely touching mine as he spoke, sending chills to every part of my body.

"You're such a good person, Chan... don't evah think that yeh can't come tah me. I'll look after yeh... and keep yeh safe," he whispered even more softly, giving me a shock every time our lips touched. I couldn't take it anymore, so I pulled him into me.

I felt the butterflies swarming my body as our lips locked and moved in sync. He cupped my cheek for a moment as he let it slide down my neck, resting it against my collarbone. My breathing hitched as he continued sliding his arm over my shoulder and down the side of my body. His warm fingers danced along the my bare skin as he slowly rubbed my lower back underneath my shirt.

I tensed up at first, but not because of hesitation; actually because he was always so warm. His hand felt like a burning coal as it caressed my chilly skin. He began to pull his hand away, because I guess he thought I was uncomfortable, but I immediately reached my hand behind me to keep his hand in my place.

Without breaking the kiss, I mumbled against his lips, "You're just always so warm, Niall, I love it," I whispered as he softly chewed on my bottom lip, drawing a moan from my throat. My unintentional sound effect must have stirred something inside of him as well, because his lips released mine, and he left a trail of feverish kisses down my neck, before making his way back up to my mouth.

To my dismay, Niall pulled away too soon, holding my face in his hands as he looked at me, "I don't want to move too fast, Channing. That's not what this is about," he said softly. I whimpered as he pulled away from me, causing him to chuckle, "Don't do that to me, how am I 'sposed to resist yeh when you do that?" he asked me seriously as he stroked his fingers against my cheek.

I thought for a second as I smirked, "Then don't resist," I said, as we both looked intensely at each other for a few moments. Eventually, however, we both just started laughing at one another. I was grateful for Niall's self control... Although it may have been frustrating when we were in the heat of the moment... It was true that we shouldn't rush things. I ruffled his messy hair with my hand... it was one of the first times I'd seen him in person without his perfectly coiffed hair... I liked this messy look though. It was easier to run my hands through it.

"Thanks," I whispered simply as I hugged him tightly. He nodded his head and kissed me on the cheek. I guess I'll just have to add this to the long list of things Niall seems to be looking after for me.

**Niall's P.O.V**

I hugged Channing tightly against my chest as I buried my face into her hair, we just stayed like that for a little while before she let out a long sigh, "Hey, Ni?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yes?" I asked softly into her hair.

"Can I... like take a shower?" she asked as if it were a question that I would actually say "no" to.

I chuckled out loud as I untangled our limbs and stood up from the bed. I turned back toward Channing and smiled, "Sure," I said simply as I took her hand and pulled her to her feet. I handed her a towel and wash cloth and left her to her own devices as I shut the bathroom door and reentered the living room where everyone seemed to be huddled around Liam's computer. There was a big bowl of spilled popcorn on the floor, which made me realize I was starving so I walked into the kitchen to see the pizza they had apparently ordered... it was now cold... and practically gone. Wow... thanks guys.

"Gee, thanks fer tellin' us tha pizza was here," I hollered back into the living room.

No one answered me so after putting two pieces of pizza that were generously decorated with olives (go figure) into the fridge for Channing, I grabbed two pieces of pepperoni for myself and headed back toward everyone in the living room. They had yet to acknowledge my presence.

"What're yah doin'? I mumbled as my mouth was full of pizza.

Louis finally looked up and saw me standing there, "Niall... you should see this," he said with a big smile on his face. That's when I heard soft singing coming form Liam's laptop; Louis scooted over so I could take a seat next to Liam, and I peered eagerly at the screen.

It was a youtube video, the girl's face wasn't showing but she was wearing a tight Finch band tee and had numerous bracelets decorating her wrists. Her dark hair was long, flowing nicely over her shoulders. I knew instantly who I was looking at,  it was Channing... singing.

Without asking I quickly moved my finger across the touch pad of the laptop to restart the song, as I glanced down at the info I saw that she was singing a song she had apparently written, called Superstar; however, her name was changed to DanningCarly. I laughed softly at her attempt to hide her identity, but quickly shut up as her low raspy voice began flowing from the speakers and flooding my entire body;

_This is wrong but I can't help but feel like There ain't nothing more right babe Misty morning comes again and I can't Help but wish I could see your face_ _And I knew from the first note played I'd be breaking all my rules to see you You smile that beautiful smile and All the girls in the front row scream your name_

_So dim that spotlight, tell me things like_ _I can't take my eyes off of you_ _I'm no one special, just another_ _Wide eyed girl who's desperately in love with you_ _Give me a photograph to hang on my wall, superstar_

_Good morning loneliness, comes around when I'm not Dreaming about you When my world wakes up today You'll be in another town_ _And I knew when I saw your face, I'd be_ _Counting down the ways to see you_ _You smile that beautiful smile and_ _All the girls in the front row scream your name_  
 _So dim that spotlight, tell me things like_ _I can't take my eyes off of you_ _I'm no one special, just another_ _Wide eyed girl who's desperately in love with you_ _Give me a photograph to hang on my wall, superstar_  
 _You played in bars, you play guitar_ _I'm invisible and everyone knows who you are_ _And you'll never see, sing me to sleep_ _Every night from the radio_  
 _So dim that spotlight, tell me things like_ _I can't take my eyes off of you_ _I'm no one special, just another_ _Wide eyed girl who's desperately in love with you_ _Give me a photograph to hang on my wall, superstar_ _Sweet, sweet superstar, superstar_

As the song ended and she strummed a few last chords on her guitar, I watched as she stood and walked toward the camera to turn it off. Not once did she show her face though... why would she want to hide her face? After a moment I glanced up to see everyone's eyes on me. They all had a knowing smirk on their faces, Louis was the first to speak up, "Hmm... I wonder who that song could be about..." he pondered out loud as he stroked his invisible beard, pretending to be in deep thought.

I couldn't help the blush that began warming my cheeks and the little smile that was sneaking across my face. Liam wrapped his arm over my shoulder, "Well, Niall... it seems that you inspired some really amazing song writing," he said, giving me a genuine smile.

I laughed and eagerly looked back toward the laptop, "Where did you guys find these?" I asked them as I clicked around noticing there were thirteen videos uploaded to her account. I'd have to watch them all later... I don't think I'd ever be able to get the sound of her husky voice out of my ears. Some women sing in a really annoying, kind of whining fashion... but her voice was just so smooth, calm, and simple... I loved it.

"Her youtube name was actually trending," Jetta said solemnly, "I'm not sure who found her videos, but apparently she recorded that one," she pointed to a video that was titled 'Scars' and I nodded before she continued, "the same day that she went to your signing. She was wearing the same outfit... apparently someone pieced it together..." Jetta trailed of shrugging her shoulders, "I just hope she's not upset by this," she finished as she played with the fringe on the bottom of her shirt... well I guess I should say Lou's shirt.

"Someone even has still shots of both videos, sitting side by side, pointing out all of the same articles of clothing and characteristics, you know... as proof or something," Liam said as he clicked around, pulling up the picture to show me.

I felt a little uneasy at the thought of our fans doing this... maybe Channing didn't want anyone to see the videos?

I didn't have anymore time to ponder the situation, however, because my bedroom door opened and Channing walked in, her hair falling down her back in loose ringlets, wearing another of my shirts she must have helped herself to from my drawers. She was also wearing my clover boxer shorts and a loose pair of sweatpants that seemed to be rolled up quite a few times.

Channing noticed me looking at her clothing, and blushed a little, "Sorry... I didn't have any clothes... I hope you don't mind?" she asked me uncertainly. I snapped back to reality when I realized she had asked me a question. I smiled and strode over to her, "No, 'course I don't mind," I assured her.

"Maybe we could take you to your homes to collect some of your things this afternoon?" Harry asked the girls. They looked at one another before Channing spoke up, looking specifically at me, "We don't want to overstay our welcome... you guys don't have to let us stay here again," she said as she nervously twisted the bottom of my shirt in her hands. If she thought I was going to just let her waltz out of my hotel room to stay in the same house as her abusive step father... she was insane.

I was about to speak, but Louis beat me to it, "Rubbish! You're staying... forever!" he said in a creepy tone as he began laughing maniacally. At least until Jetta punched him in the arm to shut him up. I noticed he gave her a pouty look and they locked eyes for a little longer than was probably necessary before sheepishly looking away... hmm... going to have to get to the bottom of that later.

I refocused my thoughts as I turned toward Jetta's anxious face, "Please, stay?" I asked her.

She nodded her head adamantly as I took her hand, pulling her into the kitchen. I showed her where I stored her pizza, popping them in the microwave for her as she hopped up onto the counter. I rested on my elbow against her thigh, and I listened to her as she began humming. I immediately recognized the tune, due the fact that I had just heard it, "That's a nice song..." I trailed off, waiting for her to realize what I said. She didn't miss a beat though, because she looked at me wide-eyed... she looked terrified. I almost wanted to laugh.

"Don't be mad..." I began and she immediately put her head in her hands and shook her head as I continued, "Apparently your youtube name was trending on twitter this morning," I stated, waiting for her to look at me.

She quickly picked her head up, "How could people find my videos?" she asked as the microwave beeped and I retrieved the pizza for her. With her pizza in one hand, I took her hand in my other, "Come on," I said as we entered the living room.

Harry jumped toward her, giving her a big hug, "Channing... why didn't you tell us you had such a brilliant voice?" he asked her seriously as he walked her toward the couch and made her sit between Louis and himself. I looked toward the television and saw Jetta laying on the floor next to Zayn and Liam was still messing around on his laptop.

I sat down on the coffee table and decided to watch the boys grill Channing about her musical abilities.

"I mean... I guess I sing alight... but what I enjoy most is the song writing. I've never been much for preforming in front of people. In fact... I never have come to think of it... aside from with my lame band..." she trailed off as she continued eating.

I watched Chan as she picked all of the olives off of her pizza, eating them first, before eating the remaining cheese pizza slice. She had some rather funny eating habits... I won't lie.

The boys teased and praised her for a few more minutes before I heard Liam's exciting voice, "Hey guys... who wants to go a twitcam?"

Most of the guys groaned but Jetta came flying over and jumped on his lap, "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEEEEYUM!?" she begged dramatically. I glanced at Channing and she was laughing at her friend's antics.

I tapped her knee in order to get her attention, "You okay with that?" I asked her, I didn't want her to feel obligated.

An excited smile crossed her face as she nodded her head, "I've always watched yours... I always thought they'd be fun," she said as she shrugged her shoulders.

We decided that we'd take the girls to Jetta's house first though, so that we could get back to the hotel before it got dark. First, Harry and I took Channing and Jetta back to the arena so she could retrieve her car from the parking lot, then after we arranged the seating, (Harry with with Jetta and Channing stayed with me), we were off the forty-five minute drive to Jetta's home in the suburbs.

Channing and I were playing around, singing loudly to the radio and asking each other random questions in order to get to know each other better.

"Favorite cartoon character?" I asked after we'd been driving for about thirty minutes.

She barely took 5 seconds to think before she easily answered, "Scooby Doo."

I held back a chuckle at how easily she answered the question before she began dramatically belting out the Scooby Doo theme song. I'll admit, her rendition was very good.

I joined in with her toward the end, and we took a few minutes to catch our breath, I was really loving this playful side of Chan. She was free and had spirit and spunk... I just all around found her personality amazing. Despite everything she has been through... she never lost that spirit. Just like her father asked of her, she never stopped fighting. Sure she'd had a few bumps where she needed some help along the way... but now she has me. I don't care if I've only known her for a few days... there's no way I'm just going to let her slip out of my life. I'll do whatever it takes to keep her whole... to keep her with me.

As I watched her randomly begin singing the beginning to the Fresh Prince of Bel air rap, she looked at me expectantly, so I took the initiative and jumped right in with her.

_"... born and raised,_ _on the playground is where I spent most of my days..."_

**Harry's P.O.V**

As we got to the arena where Jetta's car was parked, I immediately got out of the car and hopped into her passenger seat.

She was smirking at my apparent eagerness, so I decided to tone it down a notch. I played around with her radio and clicked the CD button, only to be met with my own voice blasting in my ears. I cranked it up even louder as I screamed, "OH MY GAWD I LOVE THIS SONG," in my best attempt at an American accent. She snorted and began singing along with me as we belted out the lyrics to "Heart Attack."

After we finished the song she turned it down, "Sorry if my singing caused your ears to bleed," she said nonchalantly. I chuckled because it was a relief to know that she was aware that her voice wasn't.... Grammy worthy. She laughed as she continued, "Yeah I'm tone deaf... it's such a shame," she said, pretending to seem sad.

Our drive consisted of us playing road trip games, and I had to keep clutching my stomach at the amount she was making me laugh... I wasn't sure but I think her humor rivaled with Lou's... they were so similar. It was almost scary. It seemed as if we got there in no time because before I knew it, the girls were running into the house and I was sliding into the backseat behind Nialler. We were just going to leave Jetta's car here and worry about how to get them home when the time came.

I met Niall's eyes in the rear view mirror, "So how're you liking Jetta?" he asked with a spark in his eye. Was I being too obvious? I mean she's a cool girl, so what's wrong with wanting to hang around with her?

We chatted a bit more about the plans for the evening and after about twenty minutes the girls finally reappeared with bags, as well as a skateboard and guitar case and made their way to the car. Channing's expression seemed a bit upset and I noticed Jetta patting her arm reassuringly as they climbed in.

"Er'ythin' alright?" Niall asked gently as Channing pulled her seat belt across her lap. I glanced over to Jetta who was sitting beside me and she just shook her head at my questioning gaze.

Chan cleared her throat before she spoke, "No... it's alright... Jetta's mom just let me know that my mother came looking for me. I just hope she's alright... I'm a little worried about Jeff hurting her," she mumbled softly as she stared down at her hands while she played with her bracelets.

We all sat in silence for a moment before Niall spoke up, "Do yeh want tah stop by yer house quickly? Just tah see yer mom so she won' worry, and maybe get anyting yeh left behind?" he asked her seriously while he took her hand in his own.

She didn't answer right away so he added, "I'd go in with yeh." After a moment she turned to face Niall and gave him a small smile, "Really?"

"Of course!" I took the liberty of answering for him. We'd all go in with her if it'd make her feel better. Channing turned around, meeting my eyes and giving me a kind smile before taking a deep breath and turning back to Niall, "Okay... just for a second..." she whispered.

Niall nodded his head and tossed the car into reverse as we steadily crept out of Jetta's long driveway. Their homes were rather close together, it was a mere five minute drive when Channing pointed to the old two story at the end of the street with yellow, peeling shutters and an overgrown lawn.

Niall decided to park across the street and after he parked he helped Channing out of the car. Before they headed toward the door, Niall stuck his head back in the car and looked at me, I had never seen a more serious expression on his face, "Aye, can yeh move up to tha driver's seat? In case we... yeh know have tah leave in a hurreh?" he asked in a low voice, trying not to upset Chan.

I nodded my head, watching the pair head toward the dark, intimidating home. Jetta and I both slipped into the front seats and sat in quite an uncomfortable silence. I didn't like this dark weight that was resting over our heads... hopefully they got back here soon.

**Niall's P.O.V**

Hand in hand, Channing and I slowly approached the front porch steps, leading up to the battered looking door, covered with a coating of old, chipped red paint.

I squeezed her hand gently as she reached for the door and quickly pushed it open. I prayed to God we would not run into her bastard of a step father... I was in no mood to deal with that disgusting excuse for a human being at the moment.

As we entered the foyer, you could see a collection of junk and clutter sitting along the steps and as we walked past the living room, you could hear the soft voices coming from the television set. I glanced into the room and saw someone laying on the couch, the blanket that was once probably covering them now lay in a heap on the floor. I looked over toward Channing and her eyes were wide as she mouthed, "That's HIM," to me and quickly pulled me toward the back bedroom, leaving the pathetic, snoring man behind.

She approached the back bedroom slowly, carefully nudging the door open and in a shaky whisper she called out, "Mom..?" We were immediately met with the frantic shuffling of papers and a woman with shoulder length auburn hair peeked her head out of what looked to be a walk-in closet. The frightened expression that the woman held quickly melted away as she realized who was in the room, and she quickly rushed over to Chan, embracing her tightly in her arms.

I released Channing's hand so she could properly hug her mother and took a small step back, with my hands in my pockets. They hugged for a few quick moments and when her mother pulled away that's when I realized that her right eye was bruised and swollen and she had a fat lip.

Channing noticed her mother's face as she pulled away as well and gasped softly before quickly tracing the red outline around her mother's eye. Chan began to let tears fall as her mother took her face in her hands and whispered to her, "Baby, why did you come back? Don't come back here. We need to leave. NOW," her mother whispered harshly, taking a quick, questioning glance in my direction.

Channing noticed her mother's gaze was tamed on me and she quickly introduced me, "Mom, this is Niall, I've been with him for the past few days," Channing choked out, trying to keep her voice down. Channing's mom quickly reached her hand out to me and pulled me over to where they were huddled together; pulling me into the hug, she softly whispered, "Thank you for taking care of my daughter. I haven't been around, I had no idea what was happening!" she cried softly as she feverishly tried wiping the tears from her eyes.

I nodded my head to acknowledge her appreciation as she turned back to Channing, "Why didn't you ever tell me?" she asked in a somewhat angry, yet deflated tone. I grabbed Chan's hand in mine again as she whispered back, "He threatened to do it to you too," she sniffled and looked down at out intertwined fingers.

"Baby! You don't need to protect me! It's my job to protect you!" her mother began crying harder as she tried to keep herself quiet.

I glanced past her toward the bed and noticed an open suitcase, so I quickly asked, "Are yeh leavin'? We 'ave a car outside across tha street," I offered softly. As she looked at me, her eyebrows rose up and her eyes welled up before she blinked them away. A soft smile overcame her lips, causing me to realize where Channing got her smile from. Her mother's dark brown eyes searched mine, and she quickly held me tighter and whispered a "Thank You," into my ear.

Channing's eyes grew wide, "Really, mom?" she asked pleadingly, as if her mother was going to change her mind. After receiving a simple nod, we rushed over to the suitcase, helping her mother shove her clothes and any personal items she needed to bring into the bag. After about five minutes of quick packing we slowly approached the door, peeking out into the hallway. My heart was racing from the amount of fear these women seemed to posses over this man. I'm not much of a fighter though, so I could only pray that he didn't wake up before we left.

I tapped her mother's shoulder before we left the room, "Ok, yeh get outside, get tah the car. I'll help Chan get whatever she needs upstairs," I whispered and after glancing at Channing and receiving a nod from her daughter, she quickly hugged us both and crept down the hallway toward the door. She quietly opened the door and stealthily slid out into the fading light. I let out a breath I had been holding, hoping I wouldn't see that man spring out at her from some dark corner. I felt like I was in a fucking horror movie... in a way I suppose I was.

After we watched her mom leave the house safely, I gripped Channing's hand in my own and headed toward the staircase. As we passed the open living room, I noticed that Jeff had changed his position slightly, but he still seemed to be in a deep sleep. We began to make our way up the stairs and Channing put her finger to her lips and whispered so softly, "Step where I step," and she began climbing the steps in a strange manner. I felt a heavy pang in my chest as I figured that she'd had to sneak past Jeff enough that she'd managed to memorize where each creak in the staircase hid.

I followed close behind her and only managed to fumble once, releasing a soft groan from a loose step. We froze for a moment since Jeff was still within our sight, but he didn't even startle, so we continued up the stairs as quickly as we could.

By the time we got to her room I swiped the back of my hand across my forehead, apparently, I'm a sweater when it comes to intense and dangerous situations... who knew?

I stood by the door, keeping watch as Chan hurried around the room trying to collect anything she may have missed. She dragged a suitcase out from under her bed and began tossing random clothes into it; I thought about trying to help her, but then thought it was more beneficial to watch the stairs so we can avoid any surprises from Jeff.

She grabbed another messenger bag from her closet and began throwing in some belts and shoes, she scurried into her bathroom, grabbing her necessities. I wanted to smack myself when I felt my mind wondering if she had grabbed those razors she likes to cut with from under her sink. I couldn't think that way. She was going to get better.

She looked down on the opposite side of her bed, with some tears in her eyes and as I stood on my tiptoes, I noticed that there lay a smashed up keyboard and laptop, broken far beyond repair. I was thankful that I saw her bring her skateboard and guitar from Jetta's house, so at least we didn't have to worry about him breaking anything else that was important to her.

She grabbed the remains of a photo album that was also left in a pile of scattered ruins, laying on her bed. My heart lurched as I saw her pick up a photo of what I assumed was her father and herself; it was ripped in half. Her eyes became misty, but she composed herself and put any of the salvageable ripped photos back into the album and threw it in her suitcase. About ten minutes had passed and Channing was motioning me over to the window, I gave her a quizzical look as she picked up her suitcase and messenger bag and held them out the window.

They left a soft thud as she tossed them to the waiting ground below, and right when she was about to climb up to sit on the window sill, I suddenly heard a loud deep voice hollering from downstairs, "MAXINE!"

I met Channing's eyes as she whispered, "That's my mom," and continued to quickly reach for the branch that was, thankfully, very close to her window. I could hear the mans heavy footsteps running around the first floor, and as I helped Channing get safely on the branch, I felt my heart jump into my throat when I could hear those same heavy footsteps ascending the groaning staircase. Channing heard it as well and motioned for me to hurry up, as I climbed up on the window sill, and reached out to the branch I heard the same deep voice speaking from the door way, sending chills down my spine, "Who the FUCK are you?" he demanded, as he quickly approached the window.

I glanced back at Channing, and she had just swung down and dropped the 8 feet or so to the gnarling untamed grass. "Fuck this," I mumbled out loud and with the help of the adrenaline pumping through my veins, I quickly leapt toward the tree branch. A new fear shot through me, however, as I felt her step father's grip close on the back of my jumper. 'OH SHIT' is all I was thinking as I felt his grasp throw me off my desired destination.

"Niall!" I heard Chan's startled cry as she watched my reckless attempt to get away from Jeff. Thankfully, however, he didn't get a strong enough grasp on me to do much damage. I'm not the most agile creature in the world, so I was grateful when I managed to grab a hold of the thick tree branch, with one hand, even though it hurt like a bitch. My heart was beating in my throat and my blood rushing in my ears as my fingers desperately tried to retain a grip on the rough tree branch. I quickly steadied myself by using my other hand to grip the branch as well. After hanging there for a few seconds to collect myself, I dropped the somewhat short distance to the ground, landing on my feet; Channing quickly grabbed a hold of me to keep me from stumbling.

I looked back up at the window and Jeff was just staring down at us with cold, heartless, black eyes. I could hear Channing's soft sobs as she tugged on my arm, trying to get me to run to the car with her. Before I gave in to her pulling however, I turned around, flashing him my middle finger as I screamed, "Yeh fuckin' prick!" I watched his reaction carefully and his stoic expression, slightly changed to one of shock as I continued to stand there, flipping him off for a few more seconds, taunting him. Even though this dick certainly did scare the shit out of me, I didn't want him to know that. I finally gave into Channing's sobs as I saw him disappear from the window, and again I was thinking 'OH SHIT' as we grabbed her bags and hauled ass toward the waiting Ford rental car.

Channing's hand was in mine and we were breathing heavily as we ran around the house, trying to make it to the car before Jeff could get out the front door.

Three pairs of worried eyes were looking at us anxiously as we approached, and as the door was thrown open, Maxine tugged her daughter inside, and after tossing the bags in, I quickly jumped in behind her, just as we heard the front door slam shut.

"Go! Go! Go!" I hollered at Harry and felt the car jerk and heard the tires screech as he took off down the dimming street. The sun was almost setting, and as I turned around I saw her step father running half-heartily toward the car, already stopping because he knew we were out of reach.

I squeezed Channing's shaking frame to my side and kissed the top of her head, before letting her mother comfort her, and they cried silently together. Although we were now safe, I'll never forget those dead, merciless eyes that were bleeding into mine as he watched us drive away... or the horrible sense of foreboding sinking into my skin, whispering that this was not over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a poem a reader made for my story :) 
> 
> A Kiss on the Wrist <3
> 
> Took my hand,  
> kissed my wrist.
> 
> Saw her scars,  
> left a kiss.
> 
> True innocence;  
> it meant nothing.
> 
> She was broken,  
> but she was something.
> 
> Gave him letters;  
> I bet he forgot.
> 
> I can't stop reading,  
> worried a lot.
> 
> Thoughts of me  
> don't cross his mind.
> 
> She's all I think about  
> all the time.
> 
> Still at home,  
> staying alive.
> 
> Looking for her,  
> hoping she's fine.
> 
> I'm not okay,  
> but this is normal.
> 
> I need to see her!  
> This is torture.
> 
> I heard he's looking  
> for a girl,
> 
> Someone special,  
> like a pearl.
> 
> I bet she's beautiful,  
> unlike me.
> 
> Channing, love,  
> You're all I need.


	16. Everything Has Changed

**Louis P.O.V**

I opened the door for Jetta and motioned her to enter my hotel room; although we were just laughing a moment ago, as we entered the quiet room together, the silence between us felt a bit strained and awkward. I noticed her teeth were chattering and I quickly motioned for her to follow me back toward my bedroom. She followed silently behind me without making a peep, as I reached the suitcase sitting on my dresser, and dug around for something she could wear.

When I turned around with the clothes in hand, I realized she was no longer behind me and as I glanced around the room wondering if she was hiding somewhere, I suddenly heard the shower turn on. After I realized that she was indeed in the shower, I cleared my throat and slowly approached the door that was cracked open with steam leaking out... she certainly was a bold one. Taking a shower with someone she barely knows practically in the same room.

"Someone's a little reckless..." I sing-songed out into the muggy bathroom, standing by the open door without walking inside.

"How's that Lewis?" I heard her muffled voice answer back from the shower stall. I laughed a little at the fact that her calling me "Lewis" didn't bother me at all anymore... it felt normal.

"You just run off into the shower? What if I were a rapist!" I hollered as I awkwardly fiddled with the clothes that were still in my arms.

"Lou... come on now," I chanced a look toward the shower and was met with her smirking face poking out, looking right at me, "You can't rape the willing!" she replied in a husky voice, with a wink.

I started laughing awkwardly after hearing her answer and rolled my eyes, "Good to know! Makes it much easier to choose my targets... I prefer someone who puts up a fight... so you'll be sad to know that your eager attitude does not meet my rape qualifications," I said in a serious tone, as if it were a job interview. I chuckled quietly... Jetta and I had some really odd conversations.

Her cute laughter trickled into my ears, and I smiled at the sound. After just another few minutes, I heard the water shut off and I braved a look toward the shower to see her arm sticking out and grabbing a towel. After another moment, she roughly pushed the curtain aside and stepped gracefully onto the plush bathmat that decorated the tile floor. I couldn't help my wandering eyes from sliding up and down her body, she only had the little while towel wrapped around her, so the sight before me was really riling me up. The little water droplets sliding along her skin weren't helping either. I gulped as she stood there staring at me, with a mischievous smile.

"Like what you see, Lewis?" she asked slyly as she sauntered closer to me, ringing her hair out with her hands. I was still frozen in place, feeling extremely awkward for even staying in the bathroom in the first place. Way to be a creep Louis!

"Sorry, I just hate the smell of chlorine..." she trailed off and looked up at me through her wet eyelashes. We were standing about a foot apart and I awkwardly tried to clear my throat and back up slightly, but I was already pushed up against the wall... oh darn.

Jetta smirked at my apparent uneasiness, and felt it necessary to take a step closer. I put a hand up to stop her from getting closer... I could tell she was getting a kick out of playing with me. I had to admit, that I kind of liked it too.

"Jetta... you hardly know me... You're a little too trusting babe, I mean... maybe I feel rapey today..." I joked as she crossed her arms over her chest, giving me a smug look. Her long blonde hair was draped over her left shoulder and slid down her chest.

"Lewis, we've already been over this... ya can't rape the willing! Come on man, keep up!" she teased as she sent me another wink, trailing her finger down the middle of my chest.

UGHH what in the bloody hell is she trying to do to me? I quickly grabbed a hold of her hand so that she'd stop tracing it along my chest. Her hand was warm as I closed my own hand around it. I looked back up to meet her baby blue eyes staring intensely into my own. I saw a new fire in them as she took me in, as if she were daring me to do something, anything.

We stood there for a few seconds as the steam from the shower cleared and I watched as she began to bite on her bottom lip; by this point I wasn't really sure if she was playing with me still or if she was really feeling the same sexual frustrations that I was. However, at this moment, I really didn't care. All I knew was that this girl was new, exciting and real. She knew how to get me riled up, and without a second thought of the consequences, I swiftly pulled her to me so that she crashed against my chest. My lips found hers instantly as I tugged her body as close to mine as possible.

My mind was in a haze, just swirling with thoughts of this spunky girl, as our mouths pulled and pushed, and licked and sucked. Her lips tasted like vanilla and felt like silk as they moved and nipped against my own. I felt her hands tangling in my hair, which I didn't mind since it was ruined from the pool; she pulled my bottom lip in between her teeth and nibbled gently, drawing a strangled moan from my throat.

I heard her gasp into my ear as I suddenly hoisted her up into my arms, wrapping her legs around my waist. We never broke the kiss as I tuned around so that her back was pressed up against the wall, making it easier for me to hold her up. I saw the towel, loosening around her chest. All it would take would be a quick tug and I could get rid of the annoying barrier that hid the rest of her body.

I began trailing kisses down her neck as my hand rested on the knot that held the towel together. We were both breathing heavily and just as I was about to pull her towel off, she placed her hand over mine, holding the towel in place, and broke her lips free of my own as she whispered through her labored breathing, "No... Lou, we can't. What about Eleanor?" her silky voice asked timidly.

I pulled my face away from hers, but still held her in my arms and I met her eyes as she continued, "I'm so sorry... I only meant to mess with you.... I--- I didn't mean for this to happen," she began rambling. I nodded my head and cleared my throat, "No I'm sorry... you're right. We just got caught up in the moment... no harm done," I tried to reason as I dropped her gently to her feet.

Jetta blushed slightly as I was still standing extremely close to her, causing her to clear her throat, reminding me to back up. I quickly stepped away from her and we both bent down to pick up the clothes I'd chosen for her that now sat on the floor. Needless to say, we smacked our heads together and began laughing at each other. I'll admit... things felt extremely awkward at the moment, but with this girl, things never stayed awkward for long.

We both rubbed our heads and I watched as she quickly stepped out of the bathroom and disappeared into my hotel room. As I watched her leave, I realized I should have been feeling guilty for doing this to Eleanor... but I found that all my mind could focus on was the taste of Jetta's mouth, and the way she left my heart racing. I never realized it before, but I think I like girls that take control. The room was spinning as I quickly stripped off my clothes and proceeded to hop into the shower as well. 

***

As Jetta and I made our way back across the hall to Niall's room, we kept sneaking glances at each other and looking away. I felt sort of giddy like it was a crush I had on a girl at my school or something. After I took my shower, I'd explained to her that I think I was going to take a break with Eleanor. We'd spoken about it last night, but El and I couldn't finish our conversation because she was at a party and could hardly hear me. I did feel a little bad for letting things go too far with Jetta, so I planned to explain things to Eleanor when I got the chance.

**Harry's P.O.V**

I was talking to Laim and Zayn about nothing important when I noticed Louis and Jetta sneaking back into the room with sly smiles on their faces. As well as new clothes on their backs... I'm not sure why, but I felt a sudden pang of jealousy stab at my chest as I watched Jetta walk over toward Channing with a giddy smile on her face... what were they doing for so long?

Louis came over and plopped down on my lap "Hey boo," I said as I wiped my face clean of any traces of agitation. Zayn didn't want to let things go though, so he nudged Lou in the ribs with his elbow as he rose his eyebrows repeatedly in a suggestive manner, "Where ya been, mate?" he asked him with a knowing smile.

I glanced back over to Jetta and she seemed to be whispering excitedly with Channing as she dragged her away and they disappeared into Niall's hotel room. For some reason her excited behavior seemed to confirm my suspicions, and I found myself feeling rather put out because of it.

After we ate some pizza and messed around a little bit, we decided that we were going to do a twitcam, but first we'd take the girls back to Jetta's to get some of their things. Both Louis and I shot up, offering to go with Jetta, but after Louis saw my eagerness, he quickly sat back down and made some excuse that I should go, because he had to call Eleanor.

*** **[This is back when Jetta and Harry are waiting in the car for Channing & Niall]**

Jetta and I sat in an uncomfortable silence as we anxiously watched the front door, waiting for Chan and Niall's return. I cleared my throat, deciding I would try to lighten the mood, " What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?" I asked her with a goofy smile on my face.

She turned toward me with a smile as well, "Oh my gosh... am I one of the privileged few who gets to hear Harry Styles' cheesy jokes first hand?" she asked me with a wink.

I nodded my head excitedly, waiting for her answer; she thought for a moment and then met my eyes again as she whispered, "I don't know... what?"

"Frostbite!" I answered excitedly, she began laughing at my corny joke, and her laugh was making me smile as well. God when did I get so mushy?

"That was so dumb! Ok my turn..." she trailed off as she thought for a moment, "What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire?" she asked with a wicked smile. My ears perked up at the word 'lesbian' but aside from that I just shrugged my shoulders and asked, "What?"

She started laughing at her own joke before she even told me the answer, once she composed herself, she whispered, "I'll see you next month!" She began laughing at the look of horror that must have been etched on my face... I'll admit, that joke was sort of funny, but I'm not a fan of discussing... a woman's time of the month.

I chuckled for a few seconds, "That's disgusting!" I laughed even harder because she was cracking up at my reaction.

"What Harry, you can't handle period jokes?" she asked me as she took a moment to compose herself. I rolled my eyes and continued on with the next joke, "What do you do when the dishwasher stops working?" I questioned as she furrowed her brow at me.

After a moment she responded, "Do tell, Princess Kitty Paws," she whispered, rather seductively. I cleared my throat for a moment before responding with a big smile, "You slap her ass and tell her to get back to work!"

As expected Jetta gave me a slap upside my head and I laughed as she crossed her arms over her chest, "Not funny, Styles," she mumbled, but I could see a small smile trying to break free of her lips.

After a few seconds of silence, she spoke up again, "What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?" she asked trying to hold back a smile.

I was pretty impressed that she was able to throw cheesy jokes right back at me without missing a beat, it's rare for a girl to be able to do that. I looked at her for a second before I shrugged my shoulders and waited for the answer.

She looked me in the eye and smiled, "He wiped his ass," she stated simply, and I began laughing loudly at the vulgarity of her joke. This girl was certainly something unexpected. We laughed for a minute at her joke, I'll admit, I really like that one, "I'm going to have to remember that one," I said absentmindedly as I shook my hair out of my eyes.

I was about to throw out another joke when I saw the door open and a figure slowly sneak out and dash away from the porch. I was quite startled at first because I didn't know who this person was, but after a moment, Jetta sat up in her seat, opening her door, "Maxine!?" she called out to the approaching figure.

Jetta quickly opened the back door and helped Maxine climb in, once she got in, with the help of the dome light, I could see that her face was a little roughed up. She also held a strong resemblance to Channing, so I could only assume that this was her mother... what on earth is going on in there?

Without wasting time on introductions I gave her a worried look, "Where's Chan and Niall?" I asked her glancing back toward the front door.

"They're fine, Niall is helping her get some more of her things, they should only be a few more minutes... thank you guys for coming... I don't know what I would have done otherwise," she said in a thick voice as she began to cry. Jetta swiftly climbed into the back seat, and comforted the woman.

I released a breath I was unaware I had been holding and anxiously tapped my fingers on the steering wheel, keeping my eyes on the front door. After a few more agonizing moments, I noticed some figures emerge from around the back of the house. They were carrying bags and sprinting toward the car, I immediately turned the ignition in preparation for the hasty retreat we were sure to have to make. Niall really was a smart one.

Jetta used my shoulder as leverage as she jumped back over the center counsel landing in the front seat, while Maxine quickly threw open the door, ushering them into the car. Channing had tears streaming down her face as her mother took her into her arms and rocked them back and forth.

I wasn't quick enough on the uptake because I was startled when I heard Niall yelling at me, "Go! Go! Go!" I slammed down the gas pedal, flooring it and the car took off down the deserted street. I watched in the rear view mirror as Niall quickly hugged Channing and kissed her head before sitting up on his knees and watching out the back window. I could just make out a dark, bulky figure standing in the middle of the street, watching us speed away.

**Channing's P.O.V**

I felt an immense sense of relief flush through me as I felt the car jerk and speed away from the home where I spent so many years in my own personal hell. I was wrapped in my mother's arms and we cuddled together for a few minutes, just hugging each other and trying to get a grip on our emotions. I felt movement beside me and when I turned I saw that Jetta and Niall had switched places, so Jet was hugging me from behind. I looked toward the front, meeting Niall's eyes, giving him a grateful smile as a silent 'thank you.' He nodded his head  and turned around to give us some privacy as he began speaking with Harry in a hushed tone.

"Are you okay?" Jetta's shaky whisper sounded in my ears, so I pulled out of my mother's warm embrace and turned toward her, "Yeah... just freaked out. Niall had to like freaking jump out of my window," I said with a slight laugh.

Harry whistled from the front seat, "Whoa, Nialler... that's pretty bad ass," Jetta added. He let out a humorless chuckle... "Yeah well... I won't lie... I was scared shitless."

We rode for a little while in silence before my mother spoke up, "Can you drop me off at Aunt Tracie's?" she asked in a soft whisper.

I nodded and instructed Harry on what highway to take, after driving for another twenty minutes, we finally pulled up in front of my aunt's modest, one story home. My mother looked at me expectantly as she climbed out of the car, grasping her suitcase in her hand, "Will you be okay? Do you want to come with me?" she asked me as I got out of the car to hug her goodbye.

I glanced back toward the car, Niall had the window rolled down, "I'll watch out fer her," he volunteered. I smiled gratefully at him before turning back toward my mother and nodding, "I'll be fine mom," I whispered as I pulled her in for another hug.

"You've always been my strong girl," she whispered against my hair as she hugged me, "Please be careful, baby," she added, squeezing me tightly.

After embracing me for a few minutes, she released me and started up the pathway to Aunt Tracie's front porch.

I swiped a single tear that was trailing down my cheek, and felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. A quick look over my shoulder revealed Niall standing behind me with his chin resting on my shoulder, "Are yeh ready tah go?" he asked me softly. I gave a short nod as he opened the door for me and helped me climb into the backseat. Jetta had already jumped back into the front, sitting next to Harry.

We rode back to the hotel in a thoughtful silence, I was laying down, my head resting in Niall's lap as his gentle fingertips stroked the hair away from my face. For most of the ride, I found myself just staring up at him, as his eyes gleamed back at me. Keeping constant eye contact may seem awkward, but it surprisingly wasn't... I just felt so safe with him. I loved it, yet it terrified me... because if he was already affecting me this much... that gave him all the power. The power to love me and the power to break me; I only prayed that he would tread lightly because he clearly had my heart, and at this point, there was no getting it back.

**Zayn's P.O.V**

I'd just gotten off the phone with Perrie when I suddenly got a new text from Niall;

_**Nialler:** We've had a very eventful few hours... _

_**Zayn:** How's that, mate?_

_**Nialler:** Well... we had a slight run in with Chan's stepdad... nothing happened... we just took her mother to her Aunt's home... we're on our way back now._

_**Zayn:** Ok, should I tell the boys? Is Channing alright?_

_**Nialler:** She's ok now... I think she is anyway. She fell asleep._

_**Zayn:** I'm proud of ya mate... for taking care of her. You're a good lad._

_**Nialler:** Thanks man... I can't help it. Just something about her, you know? I mean you know the feeling with Perrie?_

I laughed a little, nodding my head at my phone screen; I absolutely knew the feeling with Perrie. We'd been together for quite some time now... and oddly enough, with our hectic schedules, we'd probably spent more time apart then we did together... but I loved that girl more than anything.

_**Zayn:** Yeah mate... when you know... you just know. Don't worry about what anyone says. If you feel strongly for her, then that's all that matters._

_**Nialler:** Speaking of strong feelings... I don't think I'm the only one. Harry's been chatting up Jet the entire car ride._

I rolled my eyes as I glanced over at Louis, he was sitting on the kitchen counter, talking animatedly on the phone, I'm assuming with Eleanor. I could tell Louis was feeling a little more than friendly toward Jetta as well... Hopefully they can work this out without anyone getting to hurt.

_**Zayn:** Yeah, I think we'll have a problem because Louis fancies her as well. He said while they were gone, he snogged Jetta in the bathroom. Right now, he's fighting on the phone with El._

_**Nialler:** He snogged her? No way! Well she's flirting back with Harry... hopefully she makes up her mind soon though, rather then stringing them both along._

**_Zayn:_ ** _Yeah, will you be here soon? Liam is just itchin to start this twitcam_

_**Niall:** Bout five minutes away, see ya in a bit_

I shoved my phone back into my pocket and proceeded to stand up and stretch, glancing at the clock I noticed it was half eight, "Li, they'll be here in five," I informed him as I started toward the kitchen to grab a drink.

Liam began setting up, placing his laptop on the coffee table so he could fit all of us on the screen; I stood next to Louis and watched him toss his phone to the side in anger and let out a frustrated sigh, "Ya alright, mate?" I asked him as I hopped up on the counter next to him.

"Yeah I guess... just issues with Eleanor. I'm thinkin of ending it... I just don't know, with Jetta here... I feel all confused," he complained as he rubbed his hands up and down his face.

"Well, I'd say not to end things with El just because you might have a crush on Jet. That could be a big mistake... you hardly know Jetta," I reminded him, taking a swig from the Pepsi can I held in my hand.

"I know... but we were talking about just taking a break... at least while I'm touring..." he trailed off, "But she claimed that I just wanted to do that so I could 'fuck slutty American girls'," he said putting his fingers in quotation marks.

I laughed loudly at Eleanor's wording, "Well... isn't that basically why you're wanting a break?" I taunted him. He immediately looked up at me with anger in his eyes, "No! Besides, Jetta's not a slut. She's the one who put a stop to what we were doing in the bathroom. She's rather considerate, actually," he insisted as he shoved some crisps in his mouth in an angry manner. That's right Lou... you show those crisps who's boss.

"Whatever you say..." I trailed off just as the front door opened, Harry and Jetta entered laughing about something, while Niall was holding a sleeping Channing in his arms.

I took a look at Louis and watched him as he looked on to Harry and Jetta, since they were having a rubber band fight. I felt bad that Louis was in this position, but he can't just drop his long term girlfriend because he wants some excitement in his life... Eleanor has been there through everything. As I watched my friend glance down at his hands, I only hoped that he would make the right decision for HIM. Not for his sexual frustrations.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

As we entered the hotel room I watched as Niall excused himself and headed back toward his bedroom, and during the distraction, Harry took it upon himself to snap my arm with a rubber band.

"Owww!" I cried out as I rubbed my arm, trying to wipe away the stinging sensation, "Harry! I'm going to fucking kill you!" I screamed as I ran toward him, jumping on his back... and biting down on his shoulder!

"Ow! What the hell? Did you just bite me?" he asked as he looked over his shoulder at me. I still had my teeth sinking into his hoodie... so obviously I was biting him. I added a little more pressure and he yelped again, putting his hands up in defeat. My chuckle was muffled due to the fact that I was still biting down on his shoulder, but I finally released him and jumped back down to land on my feet.

"You are truly evil," he accused as he rubbed his shoulder like a baby.

"Oh come off it! I didn't even break the skin," I teased with a wink. I walked toward the kitchen, meeting Louis' eye for a moment before he looked down at the counter. Well this bashful attitude of his just wasn't going to do.

I jumped up next to him and wrapped my arm over his shoulder, "Hey Lewis!"

"Hey punk," he replied with a little smirk.

"Ohh.. American terms, I love it. Please say it again?" I pleaded as I blinked my eyelashes quickly at him.

"Have you got an eye twitch?" he asked as he watched my rapid blinking.

I moved my face closer to his, blinking faster, "What ever are you talking about? What, is this not normal? Wow sorry, I can't be as perfect as you, Tommo," I said as I stuck my tongue out at him and jumped down. I ran into the living room, landing on Liam's lap. He was sitting there, waiting for everyone to settle down so that we could start the twitcam... such a patient little puppy!

"Come on you guys! Let's do this thingy!" I yelled in excitement! I slid off of Liam's lap so that I was sitting in between him and Harry. Zayn sat on the back of the couch, and good ol' Louis stretched out across mine and Harry's laps. I began petting his hair as if he were a lap dog. He turned and smiled up at me and then closed his eyes as I soothingly stroked his head. I watched a small smile spreading across his thin lips. My mind started wandering toward earlier in the bathroom so I quickly looked elsewhere; my eyes ended up on the computer where Liam said the twitcam was about to begin.

A rush of excitement blazed through me... I always wanted to be on the other end, seeing the questions people asked. I know directioners are dirty little perverts, so I couldn't wait to see all of the awkward things people said/asked.

Harry draped his arm loosely over my shoulder before leaning over to whisper in my ear, "Don't be offended if they say anything rude or vulgar, just ignore it," he advised.

I quickly turned my head to meet his gaze, "Are you kidding? Why would I be offended... I am sooo looking forward to this!" I said as I fist pumped.

Louis chuckled down from my lap so I flicked him in the nose right as I heard Liam exclaim, "We're on!"

I looked at the screen... suddenly feeling slightly awkward. I mean... thousands of directioners would be watching this. I watched the number as our audience grew, and I was quite astounded as the numbers went from 20k to 40k in a number of moments.

I sat there awkwardly, still absentmindedly stroking Lou's hair as Liam smiled into the webcam, "Thanks for tuning in guys! We love you and all of the support you give! Now I'd like to take a second to introduce everyone..." he pointed behind him, "Here we've got Zaynie," Zayn flashed a dazzling smile at the camera, "Here's Lou and Harry" he continued as he pointed to each boy. Then he came to me and patted my shoulder lightly, "And here is our new friend, Jetta! Now please be nice! She's a new friend we've made here in Saint Louis..." I began laughing because Liam had actually pronounced it as 'Saint Louie.'

"Li! I've told you... we call it Saint LEWIS... unless you're a hillbilly!" I chided him as I shook my head.

He chuckled for a moment, "Sorry Jet... my mistake... won't happen again," he promised as he saluted me.

I looked up at the screen to see all of the questions flashing by, when one caught my eye;

_lydia980194: Who the hell is that and why is she touching my husband? Hands off Louis!_

"Awee... look Lewis! Someone just yelled at me for gently stroking your luscious locks," I commented as I began running both of my hands through his hair. He laughed lightly before pointing at the screen, "Look at that one! She's certainly got a good point!"

I quickly searched the screen and found the one that he must have been referring to;

_Hazzaspussycatdoll: Why are you stroking Louis' hair anyway? If I were there I'd have my hands in Harry's!_

After reading it out loud, I immediately reached for Harry's head and ran my fingers through it... Oh my gosh... these girls are all going to hate my guts! Oh well, bring on the hate motherfuckers!

Liam rolled his eyes at my antics, "Alright, have you all got any questions?" he asked the camera. I watched as numerous boring and awkward questions scrolled by:

_YesHarryExclaimed: Harry, when are you and Louis going to admit your love to the world?_

_NiallersDonuthole: Where's Nialler at? Bring out my Irish snowflake!_

_Addictedto5ds: How do you like Saint Louis?_

_AustralianDirectioner4822: When will you come back to Australia????! We miss you!_

_LarrysShipWrecked: Jetta, you're so pretty! HOW DID YOU MEET THE BOYS?? PLEASE TELL US YOUR SECRETS!_

"Awwe!" I cooed as I pointed to the last one, "I actually met them through one of my other friends..." I trailed off, looking around at the boys. I wasn't sure if I should mention Channing. They all shrugged their shoulders, "You may remember the name, Channing?"

After those words left my lips, the feed blew up with questions about Channing and comments:

_Sh0wer0fcunts: OMG. ARE THEY TOGETHER? I LOVE CHIALLER SO SO SO MUCH!!_

_niamluversUNITE: I don't understand all of this "Channing" hysteria. Who is she and why is she important?_

_iNAILEDniall: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Please tell me it's not true. I'm going to die._

I began laughing at just how ridiculous some of the comments were! Oh my gosh, were Channing and I this pathetic before actually meeting the boys? I thought about it for a second before nodding my head to myself in confirmation. We definitely were.

As Liam began answering questions and saying "Hi" and "Happy Birthday" to every annoying fan that asked, I heard the bedroom door open up and saw Niall walking toward the couch!

I dramatically cut Liam off and flung my hands out toward Niall as he slowly approached us, "Ladies and... well Ladies... I present to you... the most sought after snowflake in the land.... NIALL JAMES WHHHHORAN!" I really stressed the "whore" in the beginning of his last name... you know, just for fun.

Niall blushed slightly as he came to sit on the back of the couch next to Zayn. Zayn had barely looked away from his phone the entire time. At the moment, Louis and Harry were talking about something or other that a fan asked them about. I climbed onto Liam's lap and patted my seat for Niall to sit down, "Niall, you better get over here... your fans are in desperate need of some answers," I smiled sheepishly.

"What did yah tell 'em?" he asked suspiciously as he slid over the back of the couch, landing between Louis and Harry. I was really amazed at how easily these grown boys managed to squeeze onto the smallest couches.

Niall looked at the screen, and I saw his jaw clench at a few of the rude comments about Channing, but he just ignored them, only answering the nice questions and comments, "Well... Chan and I are jus really good friends at tha moment... but she's very special so please treat 'er kindly..." he begged the little screen.

Our fandom was going to go into hysterics because of that comment, today would be a very sad day for Niall girls. I whipped out my phone and checked the trends, and I laughed at what I saw:

**#StayStrongNiallGirls**

**#WhyNiallWhy**

**#1DTwitcamOMG**

Liam peeked over my shoulder, taking a look at what I was laughing at. He grabbed his phone from his pocket, "Hey, that reminds me, what's your twitter? I'm not following you!"

Niall looked over at me, giving me a funny smile, because he knew my twitter name. What can I say? I was a big fan! Don't judge me!

Louis and Harry looked over at me as well, getting their phones out to follow me, I met Louis' eyes as I spoke, "@NoJettaProtested," I said simply, throwing Louis a wink.

He gave me a funny look as he searched for me and began following me.

Niall called my name to get my attention before asking me a question, "Hey Jet! One of tha fans would like tah know, which of us strappin' young lads is yer favorite?" he asked as he stuck his tongue out.

All the boys turned to look at me, well all except Zayn, he couldn't care less about what was going on outside of his phone. I felt a hot blush coat my cheeks, but I climbed off Liam's lap and crawled onto the floor so that I could kneel in front of the camera. "I'm a Louis girl..." I whispered as I pointed behind me toward Louis and fanned myself as if I were sweating from his hotness. Then I turned back to the camera and brought my finger to my lips and let out a short, "Shhh.." to the camera.

I wasn't embarrassed... I've always favored Louis. You know... how we all have a soft spot for one of them... well Louis held that spot for me. Harry was a close second though.

I chanced a look at Louis and saw a smug look on his face as well as a sour grimace on Harry's. I looked again at the screen and saw that more people were asking questions, most still regarding Channing and Niall.

A moment later, I heard the pop of a door and saw a sleepy looking Channing wander out of the room, "Hey guys..." she yawned and stretched.

"Have a nice power nap?" Harry asked her as she slowly walked toward the couch. Once she got close enough to the couch, she realized what we were doing, "Oh my gosh! I forgot you guys, why didn't you wake me up?" she turned and gave a playful glare to Niall before she sat down on the floor next to me.

I wrapped my arm over her shoulder and pulled her close to me, "And this everyone, is the lovely Channing!" I said loudly into the camera. Chan rolled her eyes as she read the comments that were whizzing past. Niall sat forward and draped his arm over Channing's shoulder, "Look at that one!" He laughed as he pointed to a specific comment:

_letsTACObout1D: Channing, you're soooo pretty. You and Niall are perfect! Please just get married and have babies already._

The fan gushed, causing Channing to blush, she cleared her throat before continuing, "Guys, Niall and I are just friends," she smiled kindly as she tucked her hair behind her ears, but turned around nonetheless to smile at the Irish snowflake.

***

We all spent some time answering questions and joking around with the fans, eventually though, a new comment came through that caught my attention, "Hey! You guys... this girl has a good idea!" I said with excitement, as I turned toward Niall and Channing. It was now only Harry, Me, Niall and Channing left on the twitcam. Liam left to speak with his sister about a problem she was having while Zayn and Louis went off to talk with their "girlfriends."

Niall smiled and Channing cringed as they read the fan's comment:

_lousvoicegotmePREGGO: Niall and Channing should sing together for us :) plz? x_

It took some convincing, but after a few minutes of both Niall and I begging her to try it, Channing finally agreed. As Niall left to retrieve their guitars, Channing turned toward the camera.

"Okay, everyone I'm going to share a secret with you. I've never played in front of anyone. I'm sorry if I suck, but please be nice!!!" she whispered to the camera.

Niall returned with the guitars and they got settled on the couch while I sat on the floor, leaning back on Harry so that I could look up at them.

They decided to sing Everything Has Changed, by Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran because they both knew it on guitar, and in my opinion... it represented their relationship perfectly.

**Niall's P.O.V**

We got settled on the couch, sitting across from one another as Channing began the song in a shaky voice, but she grew stronger with each note;

_"All I knew this morning when I woke_ _Is I know something now, know something now I didn't before_ _And all I've seen since eighteen hours ago_ _Is blue eyes and braces and your smile_ _In the back of my mind making me feel like..."_

I felt a big grin take over my face when she altered the lyrics so it sounded like she was actually singing it to me... and not Ed Sheeran. She smirked back and winked at me as she began the chorus;

_"I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now"_

I began strumming my guitar a little louder as I jumped into the song with her, after we got used to singing together for a moment, her raspy voice easily harmonized with mine;

_"I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you know you know you_

_'Cause all I know is we said "Hello"_ _And your eyes look like coming home_ _All I know is a simple name_ _Everything has changed_ _All I know is you held the door_ _You'll be mine and I'll be yours_ _All I know since yesterday is everything has changed"_

As Channing's voice fell away to leave mine, we were looking intensely at one another... in that moment, I forgot that I was singing for a twitcam... I forgot all about Harry and Jetta on the floor. All I focused on was Channing as I continued on to my solo;

_"And all my walls stood tall painted blue_ _And I'll take them down, take them down and open up the door for you"_

As Channing took over, for her solo, my eyes were fixed on her pink lips as she put her whole heart and soul into the beautiful lyrics flowing from her mouth;

_"And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies_ _The beautiful kind, making up for lost time,_ _Taking flight, making me feel like"_

Our voices intertwined once more as we sang the next lines together, our eyes locked on one another, both refusing to look away;

_"I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you know you know you_  
 _'Cause all I know is we said "Hello"_ _And your eyes look like coming home_ _All I know is a simple name_ _Everything has changed_ _All I know is you held the door_ _You'll be mine and I'll be yours_ _All I know since yesterday is everything has changed_  
 _Come back and tell me why_ _I'm feeling like I've missed you all this time, oh, oh, oh_ _And meet me there tonight_ _And let me know that it's not all in my mind"_

My eyes were locked on her as I watched her take in a deep breath to hit the high notes for her next solo. She sang lightly, making the notes sound incredibly breathy, I watched in awe as she squeezed her eyes shut and sang to me,

_"I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now_ _I just wanna know you know you know you"_

Her eyes opened again once more to meet mine and we smiled at one another as we finished the song... this simple song that seemed to sound eerily similar to our relationship, because it was true... ever since I met this girl, I knew that everything had changed.

_"Cause all I know is we said "Hello"_ _And your eyes look like coming home_ _All I know is a simple name_ _Everything has changed_ _All I know is you held the door_ _You'll be mine and I'll be yours_ _All I know since yesterday is everything has changed_  
 _All I know is we said "Hello"_ _So dust off your highest hopes_ _All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed_ _All I know is the new found grace_ _All my days I know your face_ _All I know since yesterday is everything has changed"_

We finished the last note together, the melody dripping from our lips and flooding the small living room. I was beaming as I looked at her. We had somehow scooted even closer together so that our knees were touching. I laughed because we were both breathing heavily, and as we tried to catch our breath, I heard whistling coming from the door way. I turned around to see Liam, Zayn and Louis clapping and cheering for us. Glancing toward the ground I saw that both Harry and Jetta were clapping for us as well.

In that moment, I had never felt more at home in my life. Sure I was thousands of miles away from my friends, my family, my home... but as I looked back at the girl with the strange grey eyes, flushed cheeks, and beautiful smile... I realized that this warm, fuzzy feeling in my chest... this feeling of being whole... this was what someone should consider home; and I was at home when I was with her.


	17. Forget About the World Tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oooh... there's finally some smut in this chapter... sorry it took so long.

**Harry's P.O.V**  
Jetta and I watched on as Niall and Channing continued singing... I'll admit, they sounded great together. I was still a little surprised at the fact that Jetta had chosen to sit in my lap, but I tried not to think about it. I don't know why, but when I was around her... I could never keep my cool and often came out looking awkward and weird. It was aggravating.  
Once they finished the song, Jetta and I began clapping, as did the rest of the boys who congregated near the entryway. Jetta jumped from my lap, praising and hugging Channing tightly, as I stared down at my empty lap I realized I already missed her presence.  
Glancing at the clock, I noticed it was going on 9pm, and once my eyes met Liam's gaze, I knew that we'd be wrapping this night up soon on account of we had an interview the next morning at 7am.  
We all climbed back on the couch to tell the fans goodbye and thank them for watching and then once Liam switched off the web cam, Jetta suggested we watch a movie.  
Zayn ordered more room service and while we waited, we went ahead and started watching 28 Weeks Later... which was one of my fave zombie flicks. I was pretty impressed that Jetta had in fact been the one to pick it out, I like a girl who isn't afraid of scary movies.  
Niall and Chan were cuddled together on the couch while Zayn sat on Niall's left. Liam was laying on the floor and for some reason both Jetta and Lou were getting cozy in one of the arm chairs. I sat there, leaning against the coffee table trying to watch the movie, however, I was constantly drawn back to Jetta and Lou. Since when did they start acting so cozy together? Why is he even behaving this way when he has Eleanor? I tried to shake off the irritation but then I'd hear them whispering or giggling and get irritated all over again.

By the time we got to the middle of the movie, I decided I couldn't take it anymore and stormed out of the hotel room. It was time for all of us to get to bed anyway.

I ran my hands through my hair as I trudged into my lonely hotel room and began stripping of my clothes. After freeing myself of any constraints, I slipped under the covers and attempted to force myself to sleep by keeping my eyes squeezed shut. Unfortunately though, it wasn't working out so well. I let my eyes slip open and I just stared at the alarm clock that sat on the night stand. The time read 10:37pm; I continued staring at the clock, watching the numbers change over and over again. I felt unable to shut my mind down... the funny thing though, was that I wasn't even thinking about anything in particular. It's as if I were just spacing out for an entire thirty minutes, because when I consciously focused my mind on the numbers again, it read 11:07pm.

My eyes felt heavy and dry so after blinking a few times, I released a deep sigh and rolled over. I'm not sure what time I finally drifted off, because I never turned back toward the alarm clock. I felt like a was in a far away place, but I don't think I was dreaming. I felt like I was just sitting in a black room in my mind; after a while though, I slowly felt an unwanted alertness trying to zap me back to a conscious state.

I felt her breath before I saw her face. A gentle jostling from behind me was the final push I needed before I pried my eyes open and peeked over my shoulder. After giving my eyes a few seconds to focus in the dark room, I realized that Jetta was huddled on the bed behind me.

Her sudden appearance startled me, so I jumped a little and was met with soft laughter over my shoulder. Her warm breath still danced across my skin and she cuddled closer into me as I rolled over to face her.

"What're you doin' here?" I slurred as I attempted to wipe the sleep from my eyes. After a few seconds I was finally able to focus on her smiling face, "I'm sorry that I woke you... but can I sleep with you again?" She whispered sheepishly, "Remember... you promised me four hours tonight," she trailed off with a smirk.

"Sure, Jet," I replied absentmindedly as I wrapped my arm over her shoulder and pulled her close to rest her head against my chest. My fingers played with a few strands of her hair as she relaxed into me. I felt my eyelids growing heavy until I heard her soft voice again, "Harry, why were you mad earlier?" she asked as she took her finger and traced the bird tattoos located below my collar bone.

I was currently in an off place at the moment, I felt like I was in a dreamland... and for a second, I wasn't even sure if she was real. Was Jetta seriously laying in my bed right now? When the hell did she get here?

"Oh... I dunno... " I replied vaguely as I continued rubbing my eyes; if she was going to want to have a conversation, I was going to have to try to wake up a bit more.

"Oh... well, you just seemed kinda upset when you left Liam and Nialler's room earlier... I just wanted to make sure you were okay," she said softly as I felt her forehead now resting against my chest. No one spoke for a few minutes and in that time, the fog was clearing and I could finally remember what happened earlier.

I wasn't even sure if she was still awake but I whispered my reply anyway, "You just seemed to be getting on with Louis really well, I guess I was being a bit of a baby about the whole thing."

As expected, she didn't respond so I figured I'd go ahead and get some things off my chest, "Jetta... I know we just met, but there's just something about you. You're different... and funny... and I just  really like that. I guess I was a little mad, because I think I'm really starting to like you," I sighed as I finished whispering my secrets to the sleeping girl in my arms.

I snuggled her closer to my chest and tangled my legs with her own as I let my eyes fall shut once more, however, they quickly snapped back open when I heard the soft murmur of her voice, "I'm nothing special, Harry. What could you possibly like about me?" She asked me, never opening her eyes.

I froze for a moment, slightly embarrassed that she heard everything I had said... but after letting it sink in, I was pretty happy that she heard me, since I'd probably never have the guts to say those things if I knew she was listening.

I cleared my throat before nudging her chin up with my thumb, causing her to open her eyes and meet my gaze, "I like the nights when you're wrapped around me and the way you look in the morning," I said softly, I brushed her hair off of her shoulder as she stared back at me.

"I like the way I can help you sleep, and the way you look when you're wearing my clothes... I like the way you care so much for Channing," I continued, never breaking eye contact. She absentmindedly bit her bottom lip, stirring something within me, " I like your quick wit and... and the way you're not afraid to be yourself," I finished gently, as I brought my hand up to cup the side of her face, boldly tracing her soft bottom lip with my thumb.

Her expression was unreadable as our eyes remained locked on one another; I trailed my hand slowly down her throat as our faces drew closer together. Our lips were a mere breath away as I whispered once more, "I like how I smile til it hurts when you're around... and I like how I can affect you... just as much as you affect me," I said as I trailed my fingertips down her arm, feeling the goosebumps rising.

She slowly closed her eyes as I caressed her arm, but I stopped as I took her chin in between my fingers again. My lips skimmed hers teasingly as I spoke, "... even if you don't want to admit it," I finished as she gently pressed her mouth to my aching lips.

As I deepened the kiss, my lips were still grazing against hers ever so softly. It was slow and sweet, but I held back my lust, testing her boundaries, not wanting to overstep her comfort level.

She surprised me when I felt her warm hand wrap around my neck, urging my lips to press harder against her own. My hands wandered to her body, sliding up and down her sides, begging for skin to skin contact. As my lips picked up a feverish momentum against her own, every intake of breath that I sucked into my lungs was a reminder that this was truly happening. She was here with me right now, she was mine right now... and that's all that mattered.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

For the record, I'm not a prude. I'm not a whore either; but I do believe that I have a very healthy sexual appetite. I've never been one to associate sex with love... I see it as purely physical... I guess that could mainly be because I've never been in love though.

Harry's nimble fingers gently began tugging on the bottom of my shirt as his tongue tangled with mine and I wrapped myself even more tightly around his body. We broke the kiss for a moment as Harry quickly ripped the striped shirt from my trembling body. A pang of guilt rang through me as the sight of the stripes brought Louis to the back of my mind; but I pushed it away... I pushed it deep down. Louis was with Eleanor, I couldn't expect him to end things with her just to be with me.

I was ripped from my guilty thoughts and my focus immediately shifted as I felt his hesitant finger trailing down the curve of my cleavage. My breathing hitched and I felt my body withering beneath him as his finger dipped in between my breasts for a moment before finding his way under the edge of my bra. I began to lose myself in the moment, as I demanded his experienced lips, urging him to push further as I nibbled gently on his lip.

I pulled away slightly to catch my breath, granting him the opportunity to leave a trail of passionate kisses from my neck down to my now exposed collar bone. I shivered as I allowed him to softly ravage my skin, causing my fingers to instinctively tangle in his hair for a moment before sliding back down to his shoulders, pulling him closer, needing to feel his skin against mine. My heart was racing as his feverish lips left a trail of fire down my body; he nipped and sucked on my flesh, only to soothe away the pain by gently licking the love bites.

His lips covered mine repeatedly as a soft moan escaped my lips; my fingers rose to trace the contours of his neck, across his strong jaw, to end up tangled in his hair again. As his lips brushed against my throat once more, I felt the vibration of his voice radiating off of my neck, "You taste so good," he mumbled against my tender skin as his steady hands made their way to my back.

His eyes met mine, and with one gentle tug, he expertly released the clasp and slowly removed a strap from each shoulder before teasingly pulling the bra away from my body and tossing it carelessly over his shoulder. He took a moment to appreciate my bare chest, and I felt my cheeks warming because of the pure lust I could feel radiating off of him. He took my face gently into his hands and my gaze slowly moved from his eyes to his swollen lips, and without missing a beat, those burning lips were once more against mine.

My bare breasts were pressed up against his smooth chest as he slowly climbed on top of me. His skin was scorching against my sensitive flesh; I trailed my nails gently down his naked back as his lips released mine and ventured lower. His sturdy body hovered over my own as he gently pinned me to the mattress.

My breathing grew rapid as he trailed his mouth down my chin... my jaw... my throat, all the way down to my chest. As his lips caressed  the swell of my breast, I felt my eyes slip closed and my body instinctively arch up to meet his. His hand made it's way up to cup my other breast, squeezing and massaging it gently, drawing a soft moan from my lips.

He crawled back up my body, leaving my breasts tender and smashed his lips against mine in a moment of lust and passion. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he lay on top of me, fitting perfectly into the contours of my body. My legs immediately wrapped around his waist as I felt his hard length pressing against my entrance, teasing me through my clothes. I quickly moved my hips up so that he could reach underneath me and pull the sweatpants down. Within a few seconds, he ripped the cloth barrier away from my legs, leaving me in my boyshorts.

His lips were working feverishly against mine again as I realized that I had never removed any of his clothing, yet he was naked. A smile lit my face, and he noticed as he pulled away to look at me, "What?" he whispered against my tender lips.

"Harry Styles, have you been naked this whole time," I asked him with a giggle as he repositioned himself over me and I tightly wound my legs around his naked waist once more. He let out a light chuckle as he buried his face into my neck and moaned with me as he slowly thrust against my core. Although I was still in my boyshorts, the electrifying sensations brought on by just feeling his body pushing up against mine were euphoric. My hips bucked up into him of their on violation as he brought his hands around to my backside, gripping tightly to my ass as he slowly pushed me against his length, again, testing my boundaries. His hands freely explored my bare body as his lips left bite marks and wet kisses down my neck and chest.

Our breathing grew sharp and ragged, reminding me again, that this was real... he was real. He wasn't some stuck up celebrity... he wasn't full of himself, he didn't think he was too good for me.. He was a teenage boy making me forget about the world tonight. I forgot about everything, and everyone; only focusing on the smell of his cologne, the warmth of  his skin, the way his hands pulled gently on my tangled hair as he his labored breathing sounded in my ear, engulfing my body in goosebumps. I wound myself tightly around him, still feeling the pressure he lay against my most sensitive parts.

Just as he dipped one finger under the waistband of my boyshort underwear, preparing to pull them down, my heart jumped into my throat as we heard a soft knocking against his unlocked door.

"Harry? Are you alright, mate? You seemed upset earlier?" the high pitched, silky voice asked. I felt my heart clench as I realized that voice belonged to Louis. Harry's worried eyes met mine for a split second before he quickly rolled over so that he was spooning me from behind. He wrapped the sheets tightly around the both of us in order to hide my naked skin.

"Pretend to be asleep," he whispered quickly as the door slowly opened and a figure crept closer to the bed. I complied and closed my eyes, still trying to regulate my breathing. I could feel my heartbeat pulsing in my ears, and I'm pretty sure that anyone within a mile radius could hear it pounding against my ribcage. Lou crept even closer to the bed, and I could feel him kneeling down right in front of my face. What the fuck is he trying to do? Get a front row seat to the peep show?

I bit my lip a little as I tried to hold in my laugh as Louis' voice cut through the silent room like a knife, "I know you're not asleep, Jet..." he trailed off as I felt him flick my nose. I slowly slid my eyes open only to be met with Louis' blue orbs staring right back at me. Although it was dim in the hotel room, the light spilling in from the window was enough to see his troubled eyes perfectly.

"What're you doing in here?" Louis asked me softly, spying Harry's arm, as it was strategically wrapped around my waist. "So you and Harry, yeah?" he asked with a slight edge in his voice, but he kept up his positive demeanor.

I shrugged my shoulders slightly, "It's not what it looks like, we were just messing around," I replied softly.

He held his hand up to stop me from speaking, "You don't have to explain yourself, Jetta," Louis said kindly. I nodded my head, but felt a surge of guilt course through me as I saw a cloud of sadness pollute his expression before he put his fake smile back on.

I could feel Harry's warm breath blowing against my bare shoulder, giving me chills as Louis excused himself from the room and gently shut the door as he left. Harry, finally came back to life and started chuckling softly at my awkward conversation with Lou. Apparently Harry was a better actor than I was because Louis had no problem believing he was asleep.

Harry pressed his lips to the nape of my neck and trailed kisses against my neck and across my shoulder. I slowly turned over to face him, his eyes were holding my gaze as he slowly swooped in, planting a gentle kiss against my lips.

"I do really like you, Jetta," his whispering lips tickled mine as he revealed his feelings. A small smile tugged at my lips as he pressed his forehead against mine, "What do you say we just go to sleep?" he asked as he stifled a yawn. I nodded my head, knowing that any moment we may have been sharing before was now lost.

I caught his contagious yawn, and buried my face into his chest. As we drifted off into oblivion  together, hand in hand,  I thought about these two boys in my life at the moment that were completely making a mess of my emotions. Although I knew that I cared about Lou, after spending the evening wrapped around and being explored by Harry, I'd have to say that he was definitely growing on me... in much more than a friendly fashion. Maybe in the long run it'd be better to just be friends with Louis. He would never choose me over Eleanor... and why should he? A shiver racked my body as Harry pulled me even more tightly into his arms, prying my mind from the deapths of self pity.

His hushed whisper sounded in my ear, "Let's leave the thinking for tomorrow, love.  Try to make your mind go blank. Don't think of anything. Just close your eyes," he suggested sweetly as his fingertips caressed my arm in a soothing fashion. I was still missing my bra and although I was only in my boy shorts, the heat radiating from Harry just made me feel like I was sitting in front of a furnace. As each breath he took fanned gently against my lips, I could feel my guilt over Louis lessening by the second... there was no use in getting attached to someone who was taken... especially when I had the attention of this beautiful, caring boy lying next to me.

As the darkness of the hotel room grew even darker due to my drooping eyelids, I slowly leaned forward, giving Harry a gentle peck against his warm lips. As I slipped into the world of dreams and nightmares, I saw a smile pass his lips, just as a similar smile stretched across my own. This could be a good thing; it was easy to forget about the rest of the world while I was with him.

_______________________________________________________________________________


	18. Friends Caught in A Few Loose Ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Larrietta Drama... and Channing has a violent flashback :/

**Louis' P.O.V**

After we finished the twitcam and I finally got Eleanor off the phone, the girls, the rest of the lads, and I decided to settle down with a movie before bed. We had to be up early for an interview tomorrow at 7am at a radio station called Z107.7 to discuss our concert for tomorrow night.

We'd been watching a movie for about half an hour when Harry randomly got up from his seat on the floor and stormed out of the hotel room. What the hell was going on with him? I shook it off and figured I'd talk to him about it later.

I was lounging in the armchair when I randomly felt overcome with exhaustion. I relaxed my head on the back of the chair, resting my eyes for just a moment... when I suddenly felt two hands snake around from behind me, covering my eyes.

"Guess who..." a hushed whisper sounded in my left ear. I shivered as her lips slightly brushed my skin.

I heard some shuffling around and some laughing as I leaned forward, her hands didn't leave my eyes though as she stumbled forward, her body landing against my back.

She spoke again in a cheesy Russian accent, her lips touching my ear even more this time, "I em Ivana Humpalot, how mey I be ov survice tue you?" she asked in the thick accent.

I chuckled softly at her as I shook my head before whispering, "Why don't I just show you...?" I trailed off in a teasing voice. Without giving her a second to respond, I immediately grabbed one of her hands with both of mine and tugged her over the back of the chair.

She had an adorably startled expression on her face as she tumbled lightly into my open lap. I was now holding her in my arms as she looked up at me, a slight blush steadily graced her cheeks as I leaned down to whisper in her ear, "My how the tables have turned..." I said creepily, laughing like an evil villain.

She put her hands over her mouth to muffle her laughter as she leaned back and began giggling uncontrollably while squeezing her eyes shut.

I just looked down at her, marveling at the brightness of her eyes and the flush of her cheeks. After a few moments she settled down and her eyes wandered back up my body to meet mine. She lay comfortably across my lap, while her legs dangled over the edge of the chair.

I smiled as our gazes locked and gently took my fingers to push a few stray strands of her blond hair off of her forehead. Jetta sighed softly as my fingers trailed down her cheek and along her jaw.

Someone cleared their throat from over my shoulder so I took back my hand and awkwardly scratched my neck as I turned to meet the eyes of Zayn. He was sporting a little smile as he looked down at Jetta and me, noticing my other hand was still draped around her waist.

Zayn lifted his brow at us and looked at Jetta; she slyly crawled out of my lap to lean over the back of the chair, however, by doing so she actually had to crawl up my lap. So basically she was straddling me with her legs on either side of my own, and she was up on her knees so she was now eye level with him, "Zayn, I'll be done with Lewis in just a minute, and then you can have your Zouis cuddle session, k?" she asked with a sweet voice. Did I mention that her current position left me sitting with her navel directly in my face? Yeah... I wasn't complaining though.

Zayn chuckled lightly at her statement and reached past her to pinch my cheek, "Ok, well... Louis let me know when you're ready to get your 'Zouis' on..." he said seductively with a wink. I snorted as I tried to hold in my laughter and Jetta placed her hands dramatically over her heart as she stared at our exchange endearingly, "Oh, be still my Zouis heart!" she exclaimed happily.

Zayn walked away, shaking his head, probably due to Jetta's obsession with her Zious ship. I've honestly never understood why our fans shipped us together. If they "loved and wanted" us as much as they said they did... why would they want us to be gay? It made absolutely no sense to me.

Jetta slumped back down, sliding off of my lap, so that she was still sitting next to me in the chair; I decided to voice my question, "Jet, why do directioners ship the boys together? Like... as in actual relationships?" I asked her seriously.

She was quiet for a moment as she thought about her answer, finally she met my eyes with a smile as she revealed the secret inner workings of a hardcore Larry shipper, or in her case a Zouis shipper.

She scratched her nose as she began talking, "Ok.. so I'm gonna be honest here... I genuinely ship you and Zayn together as hard as some Larry shipper ship you and Harold," she paused for a moment to make sure I was keeping up. I nodded for her to continue, "Now... I'm not sure about everyone else, but I'll try and explain it to you in my opinion..." she trailed off as she readjusted herself in the chair so that she was facing me, draping her legs across my lap and the edge of the chair once more.

"It's no secret that you're my favorite Lou... so I genuinely feel attachment issues to you. Now, as I see it... sure I'll admit that boys kissing boys is a turn on for me," she stated, I gave her a disgusted look, but she slapped my shoulder and continued her speech, "but I think it goes deeper than that for the hardcore shippers. I think that the reason most of us would prefer you to be gay is because, psychologically it makes us feel better. Think about it... consider all the fans that "love you" worldwide... now think about how many of them you will NEVER meet. If you are straight, then that makes our stupid brains think that if we ever happened to meet you, we may have a 0.0000000001% chance of snagging you... " she paused for a second to sneeze. Luckily, not all over my face, she's so considerate.

After sneezing two more times, I was laughing at her, "She always sneezes in fits of three," Channing said as she came to sit on the floor near my feet, of course Nialler was trailing close behind her. I laughed as he sprawled out in the middle of the floor. Channing relaxed on the floor as well, with her head laying on Niall's stomach. I watched as he absentmindedly played with the loose tendrils of her hair that were spilling out across his chest.

"What're yeh two talkin' about?" Niall asked in a tired voice as he watched the television upside down, I glanced up and noticed that 28 Weeks Later was still playing, however no one was paying it any mind.

"Oh! I'm explaining the psychology behind hard core shippers!" Jetta exclaimed excitedly. Channing nodded her heard, giving her a knowing smile. For some reason I had a feeling that these two had had this discussion before.

"Oh yay! I want in on this! Liam piped up as he walked in from the kitchen. It suddenly hit me that Harry was missing, and I glanced around the room, looking for the curly haired twat, only to remember his sudden hasty retreat; so I refocused my attention as Jetta continued speaking, "OK, so like I said earlier, if you guys are gay... then that makes all of us crazy fangirls feel better about never getting to be with you," she paused to look at us, I guess making sure we were paying attention. We all just blankly stared back at her... what she just said explained absolutely nothing.

Channing was chewing on some gummy bears as she picked up where Jetta left off, "Ok, guys its not that hard to understand," she said as Niall moved his arms behind his head to look down at her as she spoke.

"Your fans are obsessed with you... and I'm not quite sure in most cases if its love or actually just an infatuation... either way, they all dream of being with you," she glanced down at the ground for a second as her cheeks reddened, I'm assuming because she was once one of those fans. Niall rubbed her hand soothingly as she cleared her throat and continued, "So, for the fans, if you happened to be gay, and be in a relationship with say...  Liam, then we wouldn't feel as heartbroken about it... because if you're gay, then we truly would have never had a chance with you anyway..." she trailed off as she looked up, meeting my eyes.

I nodded my head as I let her words sink in... was that why some of our shippers were such extremists? Because they didn't want us to be with other females? After thinking about it for a second, I actually started to see where she was coming from. As all eyes turned to me, I broke the collective silence, "Well... when you put it that way, I reckon it does make a bit of sense..." I said as I played with a loose fray off of Jetta's sweatpants, "But, I still think it's a very twisted way of thinking," I finished.

The other boys were just sitting there in silence sort of nodding their heads, until Niall spoke up again, "Sorreh... but I still don' get it," he admitted with a sheepish grin, looking down at Channing. I watched their exchange as I felt Jetta's hand rest against my thigh. I swear, I could feel the embers from her touch soaking through my chinos, but I just tried to ignore it and focused on Chan as she tried to walk Niall through it one last time.

**Niall's P.O.V**

Channing lifted herself off of my stomach, spinning around to face me as I sat up as well. We were sitting Indian style with our knees lightly touching, as she began speaking, I reached for her hand and randomly began playing with her bracelets, " Ok... Niall, just imagine that you like...really, really like me," she began with a playful wink. I offered her a grimace as I responded in a stuck up American accent, "Ew... um no. I don't think so."

She started laughing as she gave me a small pout and slapped my leg, "Shut up! You're not funny," she whispered closely to my face. I leaned in toward her as well before we heard someone clear their throat. We turned around to see all eyes on us, "Ok guys... can you stop sucking face for like five minutes while we try to explain why your fans are so demented?!" Jetta asked in exasperation as she looked pointedly at me.

Channing blushed as she met my eyes again and an embarrassed giggle slipped from her lips, "Sorry..." she whispered. She stuck her little pink tongue out at me quickly before she continued, "Ok, like I was saying... Imagine that you really liked me... but I was like some famous girl who didn't even know you existed. Now think about how in your mind you'd really love to be with me... even though realistically you know that there would be a greater chance of being stuck by lightning than of me taking notice of you," she paused to pop a few more gummy bears in her mouth, "Now in the back of your mind, even though you know the chances are slim to NONE, you would still hold that little, tiny seed of hope that we could someday be together. However, now consider if another boy stole my heart... if you liked me as much as some of your directioners like you, it would be heartbreaking..." she trailed off as she looked down at her hands for a moment, "Now imagine that I actually turned out to be a lesbian. Wouldn't you feel a little less heartbroken about losing me? To know that since I liked women over men, that you honestly would have NEVER had a shot in the first place?" she asked softly as she looked around the room expectantly, her eyes locking on mine a little longer than everyone else's.

As she finished explaining, I felt like my brain had just solved a Rubik's Cube. It actually did make sense. If I liked a girl but couldn't be with her because she was taken, I'd be a lot more upset if she were with another guy, because then I think 'well what's he got that I don't got?' But if she were interested in women, I guess you'd get over the heartbreak a little sooner because when you ask 'well what's she got that I don't got?' Well... duh, it's obvious... boobs and a vagina. Never had a chance!

We all laughed a little at the breakthrough that these girls helped us make; maybe we'd even try being a little nicer to the Larry shippers. Maybe. Probably not.

We were all talking and having a good time when Liam voiced his concerns that it was getting late and we needed to get to bed. We rolled our eyes, yet complied because Daddy Direction can be a little scary when he's angry. I noticed Jetta sneak out of the room a little bit before everyone else, but thought nothing of it as I stood and reached my hand down to Channing, hoisting her up to her feet. I gave it a little too much power and as she sprang up, her chest came crashing against mine. We laughed awkwardly as she stumbled back a little and turned to make her way to my room.

I saluted the rest of the lads as I quickly hurried into the room after her. A smile made it's way to my face as I spied her in the corner, slipping my shirt off, and pulling a white band singlet for "Never Shout Never!" over her head. She was beginning to feel more comfortable with her body when she was around me, and the feeling that gave me alone was something brilliant.

She bent over and was about to slip her flannel pajama pants on, but I quickly walked up behind her, stopping her from doing so. She gave me a confused look over her shoulder as she stood there in just her knickers; I noticed she was holding the pajama's directly over the harsh memories marking her thighs. No matter what it took, I was going to get this girl to feel good about herself. She was perfect, scars and all.

I swept her long waves to her opposite shoulder as I leaned in toward her ear, "Can yeh leave 'em off, love? I want to feel yer skin against mine ta'night," I whispered as I let my lips just barely brush against her earlobe. She shuddered slightly at the contact as she slowly turned to meet my eyes. Her grey questioning orbs grew darker as she studied my face, and I offered her a small smile as I leaned forward to gently kiss her nose.

"Ughh!" she groaned as she tossed the pajama bottoms back onto her suitcase, "Why do you have to be so cute? You're lucky I like you," she said in false anger as she poked me in the chest. I gave her a cheeky smile as I grabbed her hand, pulling her roughly against my chest. She gasped softly at the sudden closeness, but didn't try to pull away from me.

I intertwined my fingers with hers as I placed her hand against my cheek and then took a hold of her face with my own fingertips, pulling her towards me. I drew our faces closer together and just before our lips touched, I smiled as I whispered, "Yes, I am the lucky one."

She smiled sweetly at me, our noses touching slightly as the vibrations of her voice tickled the tip of my nose, "Ooh... talk cheesy to me again baby, I love it," she teased, as she pretended to bite at my nose.

I moved my face out of the way of her attack, quickly bent down and nuzzled my nose against her neck, "Oh you asked fer it. You want cheese, yeh got cheese. Hold the macaroni," I said in a husky voice as I swooped my arm underneath her, causing her to fall into my arms. She let out a startled gasp as she wrapped her arms around my neck, and once she realized she wasn't going to land on her bum, she buried her face into my chest and began laughing. I carried her bridal style over toward the bed and lightly tossed her onto it. She was laughing so hard she began to hiccup, and I crawled over the top of her, hovering on my hands and knees as I looked down at her shining eyes. Every few seconds her chest would bounce and she's release a little "hic."

I laughed as she tried to take deep breaths in hopes of expelling the hiccups, but after a few moments, I rolled over so that I was lying next to her; she rolled over as well so that we were lying face to face.

"Pardon tha cheese, but yer honestly so beautiful, Chan," I said with a smile as I caressed her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned her face into my palm as the last few hiccups escaped her chest, and she released a sigh of relief once they were gone.

I quickly slipped my jeans off so I was left in just my black boxers, and after getting back on the bed and snuggling closer to her, I wrapped our legs together, as my fingers lightly stroked her arm, trailing down her hip and past her thighs. She stiffened slightly once I reached her thighs, and I held her gaze until she looked down at where my hand was caressing the back of her thigh.

"Niall, can you at least get me a long shirt or something? I don't want to have to see those marks... I don't want you to either," she whispered in a nervous tone. I immediately shook my head, insisting she not cover herself up, "No, Channing... they're who yeh are. Don' be ashamed around me, please?" I begged as I trailed my thumb over her plump bottom lip.

With a sigh, she conceded and wrapped her arms tightly around me, as she buried her face in my neck. I could feel her hot breath lapping against my throat as her muffled voice crept into the air, "... it's just hard. Even though most of my scars are mostly faded, I'll always be able to see them," she said in a thick voice as she pulled her face from my neck and lay down again so our noses were brushing.

I narrowed my eyes at her for a moment as I swiftly captured her lips with my own. I kissed her gently at first, but then felt the passion flowing through my body, dripping from my lips to hers. The kiss turned feverish as I pulled her sweet tongue into my mouth, sucking on it gently before setting it free to nibble on her lip.  She moaned softly into my mouth as I continued ravaging her lips, hoping she felt that burning in her chest just as much as I did. That same emptiness that I felt in the pit of my stomach that only filled when I was with her. That insatiable need and incessant hunger that was constantly present any time we were together. I felt like I could get drunk off her kisses and high off her gentle moans that never failed to leave me wanting more. It was a habit of hers that I'd picked up on, and I was quite fond of how vocal she seemed to be with every touch, kiss and whisper that we shared.

Our breathing was ragged as I pulled out of the kiss, my hands cradling her cheeks gently as I looked into her eyes, peeking into her soul, intertwining with her spirit, "I know I hav'nt known you fer long, Chan... but what I feel for yeh... it scares me," I admitted quietly, my eyes wandering back down to marvel at her swollen lips, getting lost in the moment.

She lightly brushed her fingertips across my cheek, zapping me back to reality as I met her curious eyes once more, "I-I think what I feel for yeh reaches deeper than a friendship... or a crush..." I trailed off as I wrapped my legs around her once more. I gently traced my finger along her scarred thighs, her breathing hitched as I took my time exploring every angry imperfection, " Channing, I don' wantah scare yeh away... but, I jus' want tah be honest," I paused with a slight hesitation.

I pulled her against me and wrapped my arms around her small frame, "I've ne'er been in love. I don't know how tah interpret these foreign emotions I've been feelin' since the day you came into meh life," her eyes grew watery as she smiled at me. That small smile was enough to push me over the edge; I felt like I was being pulled to her like a magnet as my lips furiously slammed against hers. My hands roamed her body, cradling her to me, screaming through our kiss that I'd always be here for her. Always.

I began kissing passionately down her neck, and once I hit her collar bone, I didn't stop. Rather I kept moving down her body, leaving gentle kisses along her shoulder, against her chest, across her stomach, and down to her thighs. She was laying completely still as my lips gently brushed the puckered flesh and discolored slashes that littered her thighs. I gently messaged her legs as I crawled back up her body so that I was hovering over her, touching my lips to hers once more.

As I pulled away, I took her head in my hands and spoke softly, allowing my whispered words to fall from my mouth, and into the broken pieces of her soul, "No matter what you think of yerself... no mattah what others may say... none of your scars could ever make me love you any less." 

After a moment, the shock slipped from her face, and she hugged me tightly as her lips covered mine, picking up where we previously left off.

**Louis' P.O.V**

Everyone was beginning to clear out of the living room, I wasn't sure where Jetta had gone off to; but she'd been gone for quite a while now, so I figured she'd crashed with Liam or something. After excusing myself from Zayn, since he was surprisingly the only one still awake, I crept from the room, heading for mine and Harry's. I'd decided that I was going to check up on him, since he did seem upset earlier... I swear sometimes he behaved like a toddler with all these little tantrums. Why have I gotten dubbed as the childish one? Just because he'll date women twice his age he automatically gets a ticket to matureville? Rubbish.

I made my way right up to Harry's door since it was on the way to mine; I was about to knock, but stopped as I suppressed a yawn. In that moment of hesitation, my ears picked up on some familiar sounding noises occurring behind his closed door. Since when did Harry rope a girl into coming over tonight? I pressed my ear to the door as I heard the ragged breathing and shuffling of two people on a bed. That boy never gives himself a break. I chuckled softly when I heard a breathy moan escape from under the closed door. She sounded really into it, that was for sure. 

I decided to check on him, regardless of his 'fun time.' Alright, maybe I was just doing it to piss him off but oh well. I rapped on the wooden door rather gently, but in the quiet hotel room, it echoed all through out. I patiently waited outside the door, laughing at the fact that Haz and this mystery girl were probably scrambling to cover themselves up, or pretending to be sleeping.

After giving them enough time to get situated, I slipped into the dark room, spying the dark figures who were spooning on the bed, unmoving. Oh that's right, they're "sleeping." I stifled a laugh as I drew nearer to the edge of the bed, hopefully I wouldn't freak this girl out too much. As I approached the girl Harry had his arms wrapped around, I suddenly felt uneasy when I saw the massive amounts of blond hair covering her shoulders, and spilling over the edge of the mattress. 

If the sinking feeling in my stomach was any indication, my subconscious mind must have realized who it was before my heart... or I suppose I just didn't want to believe it. The closer I got the more ripped to shreds I felt; I stood over her for a moment, analyzing her features... noticing the light sheen of sweat that covered her brow and shoulders. Watching as her chest rose and fell at quite a rapid pace as she was still trying to regulate her breathing.

I knelled down so that I was right in front of her face, I knew that she could feel my presence because she began biting her lip as she tried to hold in a laugh, I shook my head as my whisper pierced the silence of the dark room, "I know you're not asleep, Jet..." I trailed off, trying to portray that I was in a good mood as I lightly flicked her nose.

After a few more seconds, I watched on as the dark lashes that decorated her eyes fluttered slightly and she opened them, meeting mine. I held her gaze for a few moments as I tried to keep the look of disappointment off of my face that was desperately trying to break free. I awkwardly scratched the back of my neck as I asked a question that was rather self-explanatory, "What're you doing in here?"

The moonlight that was shining through the window curtains cascaded around her body, giving me a full view of all of her, in fact some of her that I didn't want to see. My eyes trailed down to her waist where Harry's arm was draped around her, over the sheet. Looking back to her face, my eyes crept down her blotched up neck; to my dismay, it was decorated in love bites. My eyes continued to slide down to her bare shoulders, confirming that she was without a top.

A I felt my heart sinking, I cleared my face of emotion before I spoke again, pasting on a happy smile, "So... you and Harry, yeah?" I asked uncertainly, with a little bit of bite in my voice. I cleared my throat to get some control over my emotions. I listened to Jetta as she tried to explain herself, but she sounded far away, and I found my mind unable to concentrate on much of anything. She was beginning to ramble on, so I held my hand up to silence her, "You don't have to explain yourself, Jetta," I said quietly as I stood up and reluctantly made my way to the door, without another word. I felt like the oxygen had been completely sucked from my lungs, and it burned a little. 

She really didn't owe me an explanation, she wasn't mine. We had a little mishap... that's all. I left the dark room and quickly shut the door as I scurried off to my room. I had no right to feel upset or hurt over this. Jetta specifically said we could be nothing as long as I was still with Eleanor... and I had chosen Eleanor. I made the right decision... didn't I?

I stripped off my clothes and climbed into my cool sheets. I tossed and turned repeatedly as I tried to get the vision of Jetta's damp brow, flushed cheeks and bare shoulders out of my mind. Her blue eyes that shimmered in the moon light were burned into my brain as well. Damn that girl. Why can't I get her off my mind? I hardly know her!

I rolled over to face the wall as I had this internal battle with myself in my mind. I closed my eyes as I tried to focus on Eleanor. El's laugh, her smile, her voice... I tried to remind myself of my girlfriend, but with each thing that came to my mind about Eleanor, I immediately compared her to Jetta. In the end I was just making myself more frustrated by the second. I rolled onto my back as I glared up at the boring, white ceiling. I just wanted out of this mess. I grabbed the extra pillow that I wasn't using and hugged it tightly to my chest as I rolled over.

I buried my face into the fluffy fabric, sighing deeply; this is the reason why I was so desperate right now. I am hugging a fucking pillow. It was strange, because I was usually in a good mood... but right now, I felt extremely lonely; I just wanted someone... anyone to wrap my arms around. As my eyes drooped and grew heavier my the moment, I realized that my last thoughts were focusing on Jetta, even as I tried to clear her from my mind. The thought of her being with Harry offered a new form of jealousy to clench at my chest... he was my best mate, I should be happy for him. Maybe he genuinely liked her... maybe they could be happy.

As my mind faded to black while I thought of Jetta being with Harry, I tried to be happy for them... but all I felt was deflated and used. Why was I so afraid to lose her when she wasn't even mine? I needed to move on... get over her... we were just friends caught in a few loose ends... nothing more.

**Channing's P.O.V**

The next morning, Niall and I woke up much like we did the morning before, wrapped around each other. I could never get sick of this. Niall had to hurry up and get ready for the interview though, so I lazed in the bed while he ran around trying to get ready. I had almost fallen asleep again as he climbed up on the bed, kissing me gently as he stroked his hands down my arms. Even though I knew he had to go, I stealthily stuck my tongue into his mouth, teasing him... daring him to comply, and as expected, he did. I smiled against his lips as we lay back on the bed, I hitched my leg up around his waist.

We were interrupted all too soon as Liam came barging into the room, chiding Niall for letting me distract him. I gave them both a sheepish grin as I rolled over onto Niall's side of the bed, hugging his pillow to my chest. He hurried over to me one last time, leaving a lingering kiss on my forehead, "I'll beh back in a couple' a hours, love," he assured me sweetly as I rolled over once again and he tucked the duvet tightly around my body.

"Have fun," I mumbled already half asleep as he left the room. The last thing I remember before fading into a world of black was his beautiful laugh ringing in my ears.

*****WARNING*** Dream/Flashback- sexual content**

_The night air I had slipping through my open window was refreshing to say the least considering Jeff was too cheap to ever turn the air conditioner on, it was sweltering in here. Missouri weather can be so weird... it's April, but almost 100 degrees outside. I wiped the sweat from my brow as I rolled onto my side, feeling all traces of conscious thought slowly leaving my mind as my eyes closed, welcoming a dreamless sleep._

_Visions of bright light and shrieks of loud noises filled my eyes and ears so suddenly, causing me to scramble out of my bed, only to be knocked back to the ground. I pried my eyes open as I saw the hulking figure of my step father hovering over me. His piercing eyes traveled my body as I hysterically turned to my bedroom door to see that I'd forgotten to prop my desk chair under the door handle._

_My breathing grew heavy and labored as I tried to figure out what was happening; Jeff was dragging me down the staircase, one hand squeezing tightly around my neck while the other was disgustingly draped around my chest. He was holding me in front of him as we made it to the bottom of the stairs. I glanced into the living room, feeling incredibly disoriented as he smacked me across the face. Before my vision was obscured with flashing lights and black spots, my eyes landed on the cocaine Jeff had spread all over the table. What the hell is going on? What does he need me for? I saw a man maybe five years older than myself sitting on the couch as he counted stacks of money._

_"Is it all there?" Jeff slurred, directing his question toward the man._

_"Yeah... good, only bout $800 short," the man replied in a rough voice, he sounded like he smoked._

_Jeff pulled me by my hair toward the door so that I was in plain view of this stranger, "Will she do for the rest of it? She's a virgin," he said nonchalantly as he threw me at the man and hurried toward his drugs that were scattered amongst the empty bottles of alcohol that littered the table._

_The man roughly grabbed a hold of my arms as he held me firmly in place to look me over. I was already way past panic mode, my body was trembling so violently that I felt I was going to be sick._

_His dirty brown eyes wandered up and down my body, bringing them back up to meet my wide eyes as he replied, "Yeah, she'll do. She's a hot little number," he said with a laugh, lust dripping from his words as he started pushing me toward the guest bedroom._

_I immediately began resisting, trying to get past this stranger, trying to get away... anything._

_"You got 20 minutes!" I heard Jeff holler from the living room, where he was probably snorting his coke up already._

_The man clamped his hand over my mouth as I began screeching at the top of my lungs; he backed me into the bedroom, backing me up until I was trapped against the wall as his filthy hands began touching my body. It felt like slimy snakes were crawling all over me as he scratched and clawed at my exposed flesh._

_"No! Please! Please?!" I begged pathetically as he ripped my shirt from my body, leaving me in my bra and pajama shorts. He trailed his hand down my cheek, before pulling it back and slapping me. Blackness fogged my vision for a few seconds as I held my head in my hands, trying to gain control of my senses once more._

_While I was caught off guard, his rough calloused hand closed around my throat as he held me against the wall. Gurgling and choking noises were fighting their way out of my mouth. I could feel my face turning red from the pressure and lack of oxygen as he brought his face down to mine and whispered in my ear, "Don't try and fight it," his breath smelled of liquor and tasted of ash as he released my throat, capturing my lips with his. Violent coughing raked through my body as I tried to suck enough oxygen into my mouth so that I wouldn't pass out._

_He grabbed me once again before I could entirely compose myself, and threw me onto the bed. The mattress groaned in protest under my surprise weight. I landed on my back, more screams leaving my mouth as the man hurriedly climbed on top of me, pinning me to the bed as he quickly ripped my shorts and underwear open from the front, without even bothering to take them off. I kept trying to kick and scream begging him to stop, begging for anyone to help... for anyone to rescue me. I was crying so hard that my throat was aching because of unshed tears and incessant screams._

_In one swift motion, he held my arms over my head, squeezing my wrists so tightly, I thought they were at the point of breaking.  With his free hand, through the permanent teardrops glued to my eyes, I was still able to see him free himself and slip on a condom, which startled me even more. How many girls had this man raped to get so good at putting on a condom one-handed? More tears slid down my cheeks as I kicked and begged for him to move._

_More screams trampled out of my damaged throat as he squeezed my breasts so tightly I could immediately feel them bruising. With no warning at all, no consideration whatsoever for the fact that I was indeed a virgin... without a fucking care in the world, he slammed himself into me, hard and fast. The pain was excruciating and unparalleled to anything I'd ever felt before. My screams and cries only seemed to egg him on further, he covered my mouth with his own in an attempt to shut me up, as he ravaged my face and tore my body apart. Upon kissing me, he bit down on my tongue, in a warning. He bit so hard that I immediately could taste the metallic tinge of blood flooding my mouth._

_After biting my tongue, I cried silently all throughout while staring up at the ceiling focusing on one spot, trying to wish myself away from here. Although it still hurt, at this point, my lower region just felt completely numb. I stared at my spot on the ceiling  when he was finally finished with me, leaving me bloody and battered on the bed._

_He left the room and after summoning every ounce of strength I could muster, I dragged my body from the ruins of my innocence and stumbled up the steps. The stranger was gone and Jeff was no where to be seen, and I was relieved at that because I had to stop on the staircase twice before I could pull myself together enough to make it up to me room._

_Once within the safe walls of my bedroom, I slammed the door shut, jamming the chair under the handle. I made it half way across my room before crumbling to the floor and releasing scream after scream of agony and defeat.  My breathing was so ragged, I was to a point where I literally felt like I could not get any oxygen to travel to my lungs. My raw throat ached and I could still taste blood in my mouth. I tried to stand again, but immediately fell back down. So gritting my teeth and clenching my jaw, I half crawled, half dragged myself to my bathroom._

_After all this happened what was the first thing I could think about? The only thing I could think about? That shiny razor blade taped under my sink._

_I crawled into the hot spray of the shower, wincing as it pelted down on my bruised and battered body. I clutched my razor so tightly that I could feel it slicing into my palm... but I didn't care about this pain. I welcomed this pain ANY DAY over what just happened downstairs. I opened my hand and watched as ribbons of blood slithered down my palm, making their way to the drain. I watched the water stain red as well as the grout in between the tiles being painted a pinkish hue._

_I dropped the razor to the floor as I opened my hand toward the shower so that I could feel the stinging of the hot water slapping against the cut. I brought the blade to my left thigh and dug deep as I dragged it in one clean stroke from left to right. I was so numb, I barely noticed the sting anymore...  I needed this. I could control this. I got to say when enough was enough... no one else had a say._

_I curled up into a ball, my face against the cold tile floor, as I waited for the water to turn cold, as I waited to die. All I wanted was to was die. All I deserved was death..._

***End Flashback/Dream***

I was wretched awake from my nightmare as a blood curdling scream ripped through my throat like a demon escaping the depths of Hell. My entire body was convulsing as I clutched at my heart, trying to calm myself down. I felt disoriented and didn't know where I was; feeling completely terrified as I looked around the unfamiliar room. Oh no, did Jeff bring me here? I scrambled out of the bed, only to fall to my knees as sobs racked my body and fogged my eyes. I glanced toward the night stand and spied a red snapback sitting near the lamp. As I studied it through my tears, I was overcome with relief as I remembered where I was and who I was with. Where was Niall? I needed him right now.

 I tried telling myself it wasn't real. That I was now safe... it was just a dream, but my eyes unleashed the torrents of painful tears, and the ache in my throat grew to new heights as I attempted to swallow back the pain. I coughed and sputtered as I tried to catch my breath, crawling to the nightstand to grab his hat then snatching his pillow off of the bed.

I was still crying, tears falling down my face like rain while I ran into the bathroom, hugging Niall's things to me as I frantically dug through my make up bag. A sense of peace and relief flooded through my veins as I closed my hand around the little black box that held my sharp, silver friends. My thighs and wrists were itching badly, as if all of my scars were fresh and bleeding. My scars were begging to be ripped open again and again and again. Remember, this pain makes you feel better!

I placed a hand over my mouth to muffle my cries as I gripped a blade in between my thumb and pointer finger. I dropped the box of razors and the other things I was holding as I hurried over toward my only safe haven.  I cranked the shower on, turning the sweltering water on full blast, as I climbed into the tub. I didn't bother removing my clothes, I just sat there, letting the hard pellets of liquid  spread more painful sensations across my body.  

I stopped sobbing at that point and just cried... it was a simple, quieter cry. I hugged my knees to my chest as I cried for my innocence. I cried for my loss of security... for my body. The only sexual experiences I've ever had were forced on me. It was nothing like it should have been... It should have been with someone I love, not my step fathers dealer. I cried for the scars that marred my skin, and I cried for this addiction to the blade I had. The damn addiction that I always thought would be easy to stop... but here I am, on the verge of an emotional breakdown; turning to the blade as my only form of comfort.

I sucked in a huge gasp of oxygen as I applied enough pressure to my left thigh to form a single angry red line clear across it. I dragged the blade again and again until I had six slash marks in a row. They weren't deep, but they were enough to keep my mind off of everything that is happening. I began sobbing again as I saw the trails of blood seeping into my white singlet.

I stared numbly at the wall as a dreadful voice sounded in my mind.

"You're used."

"You're trash."

"Who could ever love a whore?"

Jeff's demeaning, drunken slurs sounded into my mind, poisoning my already cloudy judgment as a last  angry scream ripped trough my lips, as well as a persistent pounding which was taking place against the door. Before I could think of what to do, I heard the door frame crack and the door flew open. I curled up into a ball as the water from the shower head rose up around my shivering body.

The frantic pounding footsteps sprinted to where I lay frozen, curled into myself, watching my trails of blood flow down the drain. At this moment, the hotel could be burning down, and I wouldn't be bothered to move. I would welcome the end with open arms.

A gasp sounded in my ears as the curtain was thrown open to reveal my broken and disgraceful state.

"Channing! Oh my God!" A familiar Irish accent said in a panic as I lay their motionless. My brain was trying to wake me up... Niall's here! He came back for you! But my tired mind just fought any form of reason.

"Oh my-- NONONO. Channing, come on!" Niall cried, as he climbed into the shower, fully clothed as well. He wrapped his arms around me and cradled me to his chest. I was still crying, although my actual tears had long sense run out. So now I was just having those painful sobs wretch out of my throat every few minutes.

"Olive!" he said louder as he tried to get a reaction out of me. He held my head in his hands as he shook me gently.

"Baby, please!" he yelled, his voice getting high and thick with emotion as he tried to fix me. My eyes wandered up to meet his blue ones... which were brimming with concern. Niall held me tightly in his arms, laying my head against his chest. My wet, tangled hair was sticking to my face as well as his arms. Upon meeting his gaze again, I took in his appearance, his hair was splayed and messy as he continued to stare directly into my soul with those beautiful blue eyes.

The walls I'd built up to numb my emotions cracked, and fell down with every kiss to my face, brush of his hand against my cheek, and whisper in my ear. I thought he would be angry with me, but he showed me nothing but patience and kindness. I stared back at him as I whispered, "It's ok... I didn't cut very deep I murmured.

"Why Channing? Why did you do this?" he asked in a tortured voice.

"I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry, Niall," I cried as I covered my face with my hands, "I'm so stupid!" I screamed out as my voice broke, and more tears tumbled down my cheeks.

Niall made me look at him, "What happened, baby?" he asked, his voice still distraught as he caressed my cheek.

I sniffed again before I spoke, "I just had a flashback... I haven't had one in months," I mumbled pathetically. The water was beginning to run cold, so Niall reached forward to flip the faucet off, we were immediately free of the relentless rain. We sat there, both of us soaking wet, hair dripping and teeth chattering, but he held me to him. He held me so close, as if someone would take me away from him. In that moment, I hated myself even more... for doing this to him. He shouldn't have to deal with this.

"I'm so sorry," I mumbled again hoarsely as I attempted to clear my scratchy throat, "I just panicked. I couldn't make myself see reason," I rambled on. My face was resting against his wet t-shirt, my ear was pressed right up against his heart. I smiled at the sound of his strong heartbeat flooding my body, making me want to sway back and forth to the sturdy rhythm as he held me close.

His warm lips pressed against my temple, and I felt a flash of hope churning deep in my bones, "Will you just hold me, Niall? Please?" I begged quietly as he cradled my face with his hand and covered my cold, shivering lips with his own.

"Yer goin' to get through this Chan. Yer stronger than this," he whispered against my mouth. I nodded my head in agreement that I could get better... as long as I had him.

He pulled out of our gentle embrace to study my face, "Channing, yer lips 're blue and you're shiverin,;" he said as his eyes softened when they roamed over the new markings on my thighs. 

Niall climbed from the tub, while still holding me,  and walked into the hotel room. He placed me on the bed as he instructed me to raise my arms over my head. I gave him a questioning gaze, but his eyes softened, convincing me to just trust him... he's never led me wrong before.

"We're goin' to remove our wet clothes... Do yeh trust me, Chan?" he asked seriously. I nodded instantly and leaned forward as he wrapped his arms around my back, unclasping my bra. He gently pulled it away and I saw a blush graze his cheeks as he tried to be a gentlemen and look away.

"It's ok if you look, Niall" I reassured him as he swiftly ripped his shirt over his head, and climbed onto the bed. He took the only pillow available since his was currently sitting on the bathroom floor, I turned to look at him and he grabbed a hold of me from behind. I shivered as his fingertips caressed my chest; once he got me placed on the pillow next to him, I turned toward him, so we were lying face to face.

"Channing, take off yer knickers, if ya want to warm up quickly, we'll be able tah warm each other with our body heat," he said gently as he removed his wet jeans, My teeth were still chattering as I shrugged my shoulders and complied. He pulled the thin sheet over our bodies so we weren't completely exposed. Once we were both free of our wet clothing, Niall turned me over so that he could spoon me from behind. I immediately felt warmth radiating off of his burning skin. My ass was pressed us against his crotch, and he wrapped his arms around me so that they were just under my breasts. He nuzzled his nose into the back of my neck and I immediately felt warmth flush through me as his hot breath danced across my icy skin.

We snuggled up into one another as Niall placed a trail of soft wet kisses down my neck and shoulder. I unintentionally  wiggled my butt against his crotch, and was met with an agonized groan against my ear. "Chan, don' do that. I'm beggin' yeh," he pleaded against my neck. I giggled and looked over my shoulder to give him a sheepish smile. His eyes looked dark with lust as I felt his hands caress my stomach gently as he ever so lightly rubbed his arms against the bottom  of my breasts. I smirked, his face was so adorable that I had to turn over. He seemed surprised as I freely rolled toward him, without attempting to cover myself. Normally, I'd never be this comfortable showing anyone my body... but with Niall is was different.

My chest was pressed flush against his and I wrapped my arms around his neck as we lay in comfortable silence. We exchanged simple smiles, and I was already feeling warm once again. After a few minutes, Niall got this serious look on his face as he gently took my chin in his hand, raising my face gently up to meet his eyes, "Channing? I need to say somthin'," he stated as his eyes softened while they searched my face.

"I'd like to ask yeh to do somethin' fer me... jus' make me a promise," he paused to look at me with such a raw intensity, I thought I might just melt into the mattress. I nibbled on my bottom lip as I waited for him to speak, "If you EVER feel like harming yerself, remember that I love you," he said gently as he kissed me under my right eye, "If you EVER feel like cuttin' yerself, remember that I love you," he added as he kissed me under my left eye, "And PLEASE... if you ever feel like killin' yerself, PLEASE... jus' remember that I love you," and with that, his soft lips met mine and I surrendered every last bit of my heart to the Irish boy from Mullingar.


	19. Music That Makes My Heart Ache

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chialler <3   
> caution: graphic scene ahead :)

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I remember a soft jostling taking place next to me, but rather than pry my eyes open and face the world, I just decided to shove my head under the pillow to block out all forms of outside life. To my satisfaction, it worked quite well; I found myself being lulled back to sleep by the soft ticking of the alarm clock on the night stand. I could have sworn I felt a soft lingering kiss pressed to my shoulder, as well as a faint whisper fluttering against my exposed cheek, "Go back to sleep, love." I cracked one eye open but they were already done, so I rolled over and tumbled back into a dreamless haze.

**Liam's P.O.V**

I spent the morning trying to round up the rest of the lads... I always hated mornings for this reason... the worst ones to wake were Zayn and Harry. I made my way past a sleeping Zayn who was sprawled out on the couch, and peeked my head into Niall's room. I was pleased to see that he was already standing at his dresser picking out his clothes. I smiled at  Channing who lay motionless in the middle of the bed before quietly closing the door and hurrying next door to check on Lou and Harry.

Thankfully the lads weren't being difficult at all this morning, but I did detect some tension between Harry and Louis; and I had quite a good idea what that tension was involving... or should I say who? 

Paul was standing in the hallway with the lot of us, all except Niall, who was taking a little too long for just grabbing a belt; I hurried into his room and spied him rolling around on the bed, wrapped up in Channing. For goodness sakes, he'll only be gone a couple of hours! After scolding him about the time, and dragging him from the room, we made our way through the hallways and out to the van which was waiting for us at the back exit. The front of the hotel was of course bombarded with fans, they just knew everything... there was no hiding from them!

Once we arrived at the radio station, luckily there weren't too many fans waiting for us. After a few pictures and autographs we were greeted kindly and introduced to the show host, who went by the name of Bobby Bones; he was a nice enough fellow. However, I just had this funny feeling that this interview just wasn't going to go as nicely planned as we hoped. After speaking a little more with the man and getting comfortable with him as well as his other co hosts, we were ON AIR.

"Hey everyone! This is the Bobby Bones morning show, and we've got some very special guests with us here today... One Direction!"

Each of the boys took turns saying hello and introducing themselves into the microphone. The woman interviewer, who went by the name of Jen, was sitting next to Harry and she spoke up next, "So boys, tell me! How are you enjoying yourselves in our great city of Saint Louis?" she asked kindly, dragging her eyes to meet each of ours for a second before refocsing on Niall who began speaking, "We really are lovin' it here... so many friendly people, we've felt very welcomed," he said into the mic with a smile.

Jen took this as an opportunity to dig a little deeper, "Yes, Niall! We've been getting loads of tweets about you and perhaps a special lady you may have met since being here?" she asked with a friendly wink. 

Niall's face reddened for a moment before he replied, "Err.. .yeah, I've made a few new friends since bein' here; we really do enjoy Saint Louis... even wen' up in the arch last weeken'!" he said with excitement.

All of us had gotten very good at steering questions away from our personal lives... it just came as second nature now. Any time someone tried to get answers about something personal, you just always want to lead the conversation to something else. Usually the interviewer didn't realize it was happening; but Jen wasn't deterred, she obviously was no rookie.

"Oh, come on Niall. Your fans are begging. BEGGING, to know what is up with this Channing... you can't give your lovely fans any details?" she asked, sounding innocent.

I clenched my fist as I saw Niall set his jaw in irritation; I hate when interviewers make us out to be the rude ones... as if by not sharing every personal detail of our lives, we're not being appreciative of our fans. That's complete nonsense... I just wish people would understand that we need some privacy too.

Louis stepped in before Niall could get too agitated, "Actually, we've all become quite fond of her as well as her friend, Jetta. They're really good mates and we're happy to have met them," he said simply, the way he spoke made it obvious that Jen needed to move on with another question. Maybe our fans have a point when they refer to him as the "sassmasta"...

Jen seemed let down by the answer, but placed a tight smile on her face and continued on with the interview; we answered a lot of questions about the tour, and also spoke of what our plans were after the tour ended in three weeks.

"So boys, your last stop for your Take Me Home tour will be in Tulsa, which is a mere 8 days from now. How do you feel knowing you'll have finished your second world tour?" she asked as she took a sip of her coffee.

We all looked around at one another for a moment; we had never actually discussed what would be happening after the tour, but Zayn went a head and took the mic, "Ehm... well, I suppose we'll get a few months off... be able to go home to spend time with family and friends, you know... just normal things really," he said with a shrug.

Bobby spoke up after that, "Right, so do you guys have girlfriends? How do they take these long periods of separation?" he asked curiously.

When this question was asked I always felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. I used to be able to say that the short breaks we got were enough, but the truth it... they weren't. The boys glanced my way for a moment, but I actually took it upon myself to answer the question, "Well, Louis and Zayn here," I said as I pointed to each boy, "have girlfriends back home. I had one also... but that ended last year. I just wanted to say that it's really hard. The hard part isn't always the distance though... sometimes it's the hate and attention that they get as well..." I trailed off as Zayn spoke up, "Yeah... they have to put up a lot in order to be with us, so truthfully, I think we're rather grateful," he said with a chuckle as he glanced at Louis. Lou had a guilty look wash over his face as he looked down awkwardly at his lap.

"Ok guys... level with me, you have so many girls following you, EVERYWHERE you go... you've never been sick of being tied down? I mean look at all the opportunities..." he said with a light chuckle.

Zayn spoke again, "Well, sure the temptation is there... but if you love someone, you should be able deny it. We do get loads of female attention, but in all honesty we don't have a lot of opportunities to speak personally with the fans... so I suppose that makes things easier," he finished as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Do you have groupies!?" Another co-host asked from across the room, I think his name was Matt. Harry began laughing as he answered, "Not that I'm aware of?" he questioned as he looked around at all of us.

When there was a moment of silence, Jen suddenly took  the opportunity to attack Niall once more, " I just received a tweet asking if you were going to sing more with Channing... so are you?" she asked as her eyes bored into his.

"Oh... well we jus' sang tagether fer the first time las' night... not sure if it'll ever be for anythin' regarding our album; but yeah I'd definitely like to sing with her again," he said with a shy smile.

"You don't think she could possibly be using you to get her own name out there, do you?" Jen asked bluntly. There was a palpable silence in the room... you could almost feel the anger pouring off of Niall. Channing never even wanted anyone to see her videos in the first place... the nerve of some people, I swear.

"Why would you even ask something like that?" Louis defended him instantly.

"Sorry, it's just a tweet we keep getting repeatedly. That seems to be what your fans think she's trying to do," she said in a low voice, unsure of how to proceed.

Niall cleared his throat and after closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment, he looked up and met her gaze, "That is complete rubbish. Please don' encourage rumors like that... she's a sweet girl with no ill intentions towards me or the other lads," he answered calmly. I saw a shadow cross his eyes after that... he knew that the hate was going to start setting in. It always does. Sooner or later, Channing will be under fire from rude accusations from directioners everywhere.

Everyone kind of sat there in an awkward silence as the radio hosts wrapped up the show; after the interview we excused ourselves and crammed back into the van; the atmosphere was slightly awkward on the way back to the hotel. Niall was giving off waves of heat, you could still tell he was upset from the questions and accusations regarding Channing. It's easy to say "don't let it get to you," but it's another thing to actually follow through with.

As we pulled up to the back entrance, all of the other boys flew out of the car to get back upstairs, but I put my hand on Niall's shoulder to make him stop, "It'll be ok, mate," I told him, trying to be reassuring. He looked down for a split second, then looked up to meet my eyes. I noticed him nervously biting the inside of his cheek as he spoke, "Do you ever regret bringing Dani into all of this?" he asked me seriously as he motioned toward the hotel where hundreds of fans were screaming, crying, and waiting hours in the heat just to get a glimpse of us entering or exiting the hotel.

I looked at him for a moment, but without hesitation I answered him, "Of course not. I regret nothing about Danielle. She was the best part of Xfactor for me, aside from you lads of course," I said as I tousled his hair, "but... sometimes they just can't take the hate... or the time apart. It just really depends on the person, Niall... but if you really care for that girl up there... don't think you're protecting her by keeping her out of the spotlight. She is strong. We all know exactly how strong she is... so don't be afraid to try," I said softly as I wrapped my arm around his shoulder and gave him a side hug. 

**Niall's P.O.V  *Graphic Love Scene***

I wasn't in the best mood as I trudged up the lobby staircase and headed for the elevator, but I knew that once I was back in bed, lying next to Channing I'd feel better again. She always managed to make me forget everything else. Zayn and Liam had gone off to breakfast, while Harry and Lou went back to their room. They had hardly said one word to each other all morning, which I found extremely odd. I wasn't entirely sure where Jetta was... but I had a feeling she was waiting in the room across the hall.

As I entered my room and opened the fridge for a drink, my ears were met with a piercing screech that sounded from the back bedroom. Without an ounce of hesitation, I dropped my soda and sprinted to my bedroom. I looked around frantically and could hear loud sobbing but didn't see her anywhere; suddenly I spied that the bathroom door was shut and felt my heart sink in realization. As I got closer to the door I heard the water running as well as hysterical sobbing creeping out from under the door.

I began pounding my fist against the unforgiving wood, followed by ramming my shoulder against the it. After my 5th push, I heard the door frame crack and splinter away so that I could push the now useless wood aside. I felt a nagging throbbing in my shoulder, but in that moment I didn't care.

As I quickly approached the shower, I was terrified of what I may see on the other side of the closed curtain; but there was no going back. My hand was shaking as I reached out and harshly pushed it aside. Looking down to the shower floor, I gasped as I saw her lying there. Channing... my Channing. Fully clothed, with streaks of red dripping from her thighs, crying hysterically as she tried to curl up into a ball. Without a second thought I jumped in behind her, pulling her so that I could see her face.

She refused to meet my eyes, she refused to even look at me, and I knew it was because she felt ashamed of herself. I'm not going to lie... I was extremely disappointed, but I couldn't show it, she needed that reassurance that I could handle her when she was at her lowest... that I would still love her even when she was at her worst.

***

**Niall's P.O.V (When they are lying on the bed... naked after the shower scene ;])**

I held her close to me, her face in my hands and our eyes locked. Her soft breath trembled from her lips and fell against my chin as I pulled her in for a kiss. I had just told her that I loved her, and it felt incredible to be able to say that to someone, and honestly mean it. I had never meant those words more in my life then I did right now. I didn't care if I hadn't known her long... when you know, you just _know_.

My heart ached a little as I kissed her lips, tasting the salt from those tears. The remnants of her pain that I was more than willing to take on as my own. If only I could take it all from her, I would in a heartbeat. Her grey eyes gazed into mine and I smiled as I felt the flutter of her long lashes againt my cheeks. After gently rubbing my nose teasingly against hers, I pulled away slightly to see a small smile curve her lips.

Her hair was still wet and it was splayed out all over the pillow; as I drew her close and demanded her lips against mine, I tangled my hands into the damp locks, tugging at them slightly as the lust within me rose. Sometimes I felt nervous on just how far I should take things with Chan; I knew her sexual history was rather traumatic and I didn't want to trigger any bad memories. As the passion increased between us, much to my own dismay, and hers alike, I pulled out of the kiss as we both took a few seconds to refill our burning lungs with air. I studied the little patch of freckles that were splashed across her cheeks, as well as the beauty mark she had beneath her left eye brow, before her voice pulled my eyes down to gaze at her pink lips.

Her eyes narrowed at me as an irritated huff left her lips, "Why do you always do that?" she asked in a soft voice as she looked anywhere but into my eyes. I took my hand to turn her head towards me, "What?" I asked, unsure of what she was getting at. I tangled our bare legs together, jumping slightly as her chilly feet pressed against my calf.

She giggled at my actions and  blushed slightly, "Anytime we're getting really into it... you always pull away," she confessed with a sad look on her face... "D--Do you not want to because of my past?" she asked me timidly. I immediately felt a tug in my chest at how deflated she looked, "'Course not... I jus' don't want tah  pressure yeh... what we have... it's not jus' about that... it was never about that," I said softly as I placed my lips against hers once more.

Chan eagerly accepted my kiss and instantly deepened it. She sucked on my tongue for a few seconds before I pulled her bottom lip into my mouth, sucking gently. A little moan slipped through her lips, right into my mouth, giving me a set of chills that spilled down my spine. After a few more seconds of kissing me passionately, she pulled away, but as she spoke her lips still barely grazed mine, "Can you make love to me already? You've serenaded me with your voice, you've captured me with your words, and you've trapped me with your kiss..." she trailed off softly as her eyes burned into mine. She trailed her lips down my jaw and neck before slowly returning to my to whisper against my lips, "Niall... I want you," she kissed my chest, "and I.... I love you. I want to make love to you too; I want to know what it feels like to make love..." she whispered against my lips.

I felt her fingertips trailing down my naked chest, she slid them all the way down until she could grasp my hip; I found my eyes wandering down to her exposed chest that was pressing freely against mine, and I pulled her closer, pressing her almost painfully against my body. Her touch was maddening, and I groaned as I felt her hesitant lips dancing across my collar bone, leaving a burning path of sweet kisses straight across my chest. My eyes closed for a moment before I heard her desperate whisper, "Niall... I know we've been moving fast... but I want this. I don't know if I'll ever see you again after you leave here," she said almost sadly, I was about to protest but she placed her hand gently against my mouth, "I know we will try to stay in contact, Niall... but sometimes these things don't work out. Regardless... I want to know that I've given myself to someone... that it was MY choice," she trailed off as she swept her hand against my cheek. I closed my eyes and leaned into her warm touch, brushing my fingers against her hip as well.

Her lips found their way back to the crook of my neck and she began sucking gently for a moment before she pulled away slightly, "All I have is all of me... and it's all that I can give," she whispered with so much emotion that it caused me to shiver as her hot breath swept across the wetness that her lips had just left tingling on my skin.

I lay there stunned, looking into her beautiful grey eyes, they brightened slightly as I placed my hand against her cheek, "Are yeh sure?" I mumbled in between more passionate kisses she rained down on my lips. She placed her forehead against mine, and as she locked her eyes with mine, I knew she was. I felt a new fire enter my body as I marveled at the warm glow of her cheeks, and the deep lust I could feel swimming through her thoughts... but it wasn't only lust. I could feel love too. Her heavy-lidded eyes closed slowly as I brought my lips to just below her earlobe, knowing that was her sweet spot.

"Channing... I don' know what tha future holds... but I promise yeh, I'm not goin' anywhere," I said forcefully as I cradled her head in between my hands. Touching my forehead to hers, "You'll never be put through tha' hell again. I won' let that happen," I said in a thick voice as I squeezed my eyes shut, as my unrelenting imagination punished me with images of Chan's terrified face.

I wrapped my arms tightly around her body, pulling her so close to me; as if I were trying to make us one. I crawled on top of her, hovering over her trembling body, taking all of her in. I knew she wasn't shaking because she was scared... she was shaking in anticipation. She was so beautiful my eyes trailed down her fully exposed body, and I had never felt more lucky in my life. Her passion bruised lips offered me a nervous smile as I left a trail of kisses from her jaw line to her collar bone. My hands caressed her chest; I sucked one of her breasts into my mouth as I messaged the other. The moans that fell from her lips were enough encouragement for me to forget any second thoughts I may have felt. I gently squeezed her breasts as I crawled back up her body, searching for her mouth.

**Channing's P.O.V**

As Niall passionately intertwined his tongue with mine, we fought for dominance before I let him take the lead. He released my mouth and left trails of fiery kisses all over my body, from my neck, to my breasts, to my stomach... even to my botched thighs. He was very careful as he kissed my newer cuts, and I felt a stab of guilt prick my heart. He climbed back up my body, cradling my face,

"Let me take care of yeh, let me show yeh what love is supposed tah feel like," he whispered against my lips. I nodded as he sucked gently on my neck while he kneaded my breast, rolling my nipple between his thumb and fingers. His touch was so gentle, so different than what my first time was like. This should have been my first time. As I thought these thoughts, I tried to push them away, but they leaked across my mind and I suddenly felt my eyes welling up with tears.

Niall brought his face back to mine and gave me a startled look, "Oh my God... I'm so sorry. We can stop, please don' cry," he begged as he swiped away the tears that began to slide down my cheeks.

I immediately shook my head as I gently touched my hand to his face, "No, please don't... I just wish you could have been my first," I whispered hoarsely as I bit my lip, trying to get control of my emotions.

Niall's worried expression melted away as his eyes softened; he kissed my lips tenderly before pulling away, cradling my face between his hands, "Channing... This is yer first time. Don't ever think otherwise... when yeh think of yer first time... think of me... think of us... think of this moment. No one else matters," he said gently, causing my heart, my lips, everything to ache... but in a good way. It was a good feeling, and it was then that I realized just how much he cared for me.

I drew him in, kissing him so passionately, that my lips felt sore as he released me, again trailing his hands down my body, followed by his lips. He found many of my sweet spots, taking time to suck on each one gently before continuing on to a new unexplored part of my body. As his hand trailed down, he lightly caressed my thighs before he painfully slowly inched his fingertips to my most sensitive parts.

As he slowly began rubbing me, sending shock waves throughout my body, I felt my body trembling underneath his gentle touch. I buried my face against his warm chest, sounds of pleasure slipping past my lips; and I found myself pressing wet kisses against his neck in an attempt to distract myself from the incredible sensations radiating through my body. Niall slowly inserted two fingers into me, it was uncomfortable at first, but after a few gentle thrusts from his nimble fingers, I felt a new tension building in my stomach.

I gently bit against his shoulder; trying to muffle the screams that were threatening to tear out of my throat. I could feel his length, long and firm, pressing against my outer thigh as he continued to work on me. I slipped my fingers around him, rubbing him up and down, squeezing gently. He released a strangled groan as he buried his own face into the crook of my neck, nibbling on my tender flesh. We lay there, our hands expertly manipulating the others most sensitive parts.

He crawled on top of me, his fingertips lightly tracing the curve of my hips as he hovered over my trembling body. Anticipation and excitement flooded through me and I reached up, tightly wrapping my arms around his neck, pressing my breasts to his toned chest, my flailing heartbeat against the steady beat of his own. He playfully pinned my hands back down to the bed, looking me in the eye as he slowly began removing my bracelets. At first, I felt nervous, trying to pull my arm out of his grasp, but he soothed me with a kiss to my nose.

I relaxed and watched as he straddled me, the sheet between our bodies still. He kept his weight on his knees so as not to place any pressure to my body. I watched as he carefully emptied all of the bracelets from my left wrist, making it immediately feel lighter and less cumbersome. After kissing the everlasting wounds, he placed my hand back on the bed and reached for the other one. His eyes never left mine as he emptied my other wrist, making it feel free, yet exposed and vulnerable. He took both of my wrists in his hands, gently peppering them with light kisses, as his eyes stared unblinking into my own. A warm feeling in my chest overpowered all of my senses and I smiled up at him as I closed my eyes.

"I want to see all of you... every part," he whispered as he climbed back down my body, slipping underneath the sheet, hovering over the top of me. He began moving my legs farther apart, giving himself more space to work with. Our eyes met as I felt his hard length brushing against my body, and I pressed my lips against his urgently.

He returned my fiery kiss as he gently adjusted my hips upward, making it easier for him to enter me. He teased at my entrance for a moment, but my breath caught in my throat as he slowly slid into my body. I squeezed my eyes shut as there was a slight twinge of pain, but it was almost instantly gone as he pulled out and thrust into me once more. After his third thrust, I opened my eyes to see him staring down at me in concern, he remained still in my body as he spoke, "Are you ok, love?" his whisper danced along my skin as I pulled his lips to mine, kissing him with every ounce of love I could muster.   

I watched his eyes close in understanding, and as he gently thrust in and out of me, his lips never left my body. Every bit of skin he could reach, he made sure to suck, stroke, and kiss. Our sighs and moans intertwined as they spread throughout the room, bouncing off the walls, returning the passionate music back to our ears. "Ughh," he groaned against my throat, "Channing, you're so tight," he whispered, sounding breathless as he continued moving in and out of my body; thrusting in deeply, holding our bodies together for a few intense moments before pulling out again. Droplets of sweat began forming along our  faces, and our chests began to shine because of the newly created moisture seeping from our bodies. 

He continued rocking gently in and out of me, and after some time I found myself whispering against his jaw, "Harder... harder, Niall... I'm close..." as I wrapped my arms tighter against his shoulders. My suggestion drew a moan from his lips, but he complied instantly as he held me tightly against him. I found that he was lifting us both up so that he was sitting up on his knees and I was now on his lap. He never pulled out of me, rather he just continued moving his hips against mine, as did I. My legs wrapped tightly around his strong waist and I hugged my body tightly against his as he helped me slide up and down his shaft, moving me up and down with his own arms. I watched his arms flexing, feeling an excited rush as I watched his face scrunch up in pleasure; knowing that is was because of me. Our bodies thrust against each other; at this new angle, he reached deeper, and I was able to reach new heights.

With each thrust, he drew a gasp from my lips; he quickly met my mouth, allowing my moans to release into his. His hands found my breasts once more, his touch was like a torch to my skin, and I began to come unraveled as every inch he touched set me aflame.

Niall gently brought us down to the bed again as both of our moans were growing louder; each of us trying to hold out for the other. I bit down on my lip to help keep my voice down, but he pried my mouth open with his tongue and after releasing my lips he whispered through his ragged breathing, "Let me... hear you... don't hold back," he groaned against my lips. Our bodies were moist and I watched as the sweat from his chest dripped on to my own; I shivered as his pace picked up a notch and I was moaning loudly, feeling my body clenching around his.

I closed my eyes as he pounded his body into mine, his thrusts growing sloppy; the tension in the pit of my stomach wrestled to break free of my body. I lightly scraped my nails down his spine as I stopped holding back my voice. Sounds I'd never created before were breaking free of my mouth while sensations I'd never felt before transformed my body into a trembling, withering mess.

His eyes met mine and in that instant I felt myself let go. My walls clenched uncontrollably around him as a feeling of pure bliss engulfed my body and mind. His own groans grew louder as I felt him twitch within me, instantly filling me with a warm feeling. As we fell together, crumbling into a mess upon each other... it was beautiful. His lips were pressed to my neck, and I felt the frantic beating of his heart as we fell together. We both felt vulnerable, yet neither of us weak. Together we were strong... because of him, I was strong.

Niall thrust slowly a few more times as the shimmering embers of our peaks faded away, leaving us in a state of perfect euphoria. He stopped, but didn't pull out of me as I opened my eyes to meet his gaze. The sensation I got when I felt his eyes penetrating mine made me pull his lips gently against my own; I tried putting everything I had into that kiss. Every ounce of love, passion and trust I felt for him. I felt him putting everything he had into it as well; sweat was covering us both as we tried to catch our breath and calm our frantically beating hearts.

"I love you, Channing... I love you so much," he whispered against my lips, causing goosebumps to swarm my body and butterflies to engulf my pounding heart. I smiled, "I love you too," I mumbled against his shoulder as I hugged him against me once more. His slick, moist skin feeling perfect against my own. I could feel him still inside me, growing slack as our harsh breathing began to even out. He slowly pulled out of my body, slipping out a small moan as I sighed at the loss of contact. I immediately missed the fullness he made me feel.

Although I knew I cared for Niall before now, I don't think I could say I truly loved him... because I don't think you can love without physical contact. When you love, you love with every single fiber of your being; you can't just love with your mind, you have to love with your body as well. You can certainly care for someone deeply... but until you've kissed, touched, felt, held, cried, and laughed with that person, it can never be love.

As he released me, and we lay next to each other, I felt exhaustion setting in as he wrapped his arms around my waist, "Go tah sleep, love," Niall's voice echoed throughout my mind as he kissed my temple. I had every intention of doing so, but I wanted something from him first... like that first night we spent together... I wanted to hear his voice, "Will you sing for me?" I asked him softly as I glanced at him over my shoulder. Resting his chin on my shoulder, he gave me a small nod, "What do'yeah want tah hear, Olive?" he asked sweetly, his cool breath tickling the nape of my neck as he moved my hair out of the way.

I felt him slowly slide back down to the mattress, after playfully nipping at my shoulder. His body fitting perfectly behind mine, he wrapped his arms tightly around my waist and I could feel the hum of his Adams apple as it vibrated against my skin, "Anything... I just want to hear your voice," I whispered as I interlocked our fingers together.

He chuckled as he tucked the sheet tightly around our bodies, and I waited in silence as he decided on what to sing for me. His steady breathing traipsed across my skin as it expelled softly from his open lips, and after another moment of silence, I heard his unique, beautiful voice radiating against my skin;

_"We're on an open bed truck on the highway_ _The rain is coming down and we're on the run_ _Think I can feel the breath in your body_ _We gotta keep on running 'til we see the sun_

_Oh you got a fire and it's burning in the rain_ _Thought that it went out, but it's burning just the same_ _And you don't look back, not for anything_ _'Cause if you love someone, you love them all the same_ _If you love someone, you love them all the same"_

The lovely trill of his voice gave me goose bumps as my head sank deeper into the pillow, listening to his melodic tone, God... I loved this boy. Everything about him made me weak. I pulled his arms that were wrapped around my waist so that they were now higher up my body, circling my chest as I clutched him tightly to me, like I would a teddy bear.

_"Oh, I feel your heartbeat_ _And you're coming around, coming around, coming around_ _If you can love somebody, love them all the same_ _You gotta love somebody, love them all the same_ _Singing, oh, I feel your heartbeat_  
 _I'm trying to put it all back together._ _I've got a story and I'm trying to tell it right._ _I got the kerosene and a desire._ _I'm trying to start a flame in the heart of the night_  
 _Oh you got a fire and it's burning in the rain_ _Thought that it went out, but it's burning just the same_ _And you don't look back, not for anything_ _'Cause if you love someone, you love them all the same_ _If you love someone, you love them all the same"_

His voice grew louder as he sang with emotion, and I could feel my eyes growing heavier. I extended his arms out so that our wrists were lying side by side. His clear beautiful skin, next to my marred and battered flesh. Although the comparison would normally make me feel ugly... I didn't. I felt strong. Niall caressed my painfully decorated wrist gently with his warm fingertips as he continued on;

_"Oh, I feel your heartbeat_ _And you're coming around, coming around, coming around_ _If you can love somebody, love them all the same_ _You gotta love somebody, love them all the same_ _Singing, oh, I feel your heartbeat"_

He slowly rolled me over so that we were facing each other once again; as The Fray's heartfelt lyrics tumbled from his lips, I felt a fuzzy feeling in the pit of my stomach begin to grow as he took my naked wrist to his lips, kissing them gently, just as he did when we first met, my breath caught in my throat as his eyes met mine;

_"Ooh, ooh_ _I know the memories are rushing into mind_ _I wanna kiss your scars tonight, baby_ _'Cause you gotta try_ _You gotta let me in_ _Let me in_

I paused the song as I dipped my head down, he was laying his cheek against my wrist as I began nudging his focus away from my body. I captured his lips with my own, and he surrendered to me as I explored his mouth one last time. The passion and lust swirled around my stomach, but most of all... I felt love.

"Do you know why I love you so much," I asked him as his lips released mine, our breaths coming out in quickened puffs. He slowly shook his head as he let his fingers travel from cupping my cheek to skimming down my shoulder, all the way down until he lovingly tickled his fingers across my lower back, giving me a cheeky smile.

I smiled at him before sucking in a deep breath, "I fell in love with you..." I trailed off as I stroked his exposed bicep, gently squeezing his muscle, before letting my hands rest against his face once more; I shut my eyes tightly as I continued, "Because you loved me... when I couldn't love myself," I said softly, brushing my lips against his as I spoke. My eyes were still closed and I waited a few moments, but he didn't respond. Curiously, I peeked my eyes open to see his beautiful blue orbs peering into mine, "You are the most lovely, prettiest, kindest, most caring woman I have ever met... and even that is an understatement, Chan," he whispered softly across my lips. I smiled, unable to hide my blush from his compliment.

As I leaned forward, I buried my face into his warm, pale chest; holding his hand tightly, I could feel the relentless arms of sleep trying to pull me under. I yawned softly and looked up to see that Niall was still watching me, "Go tah sleep now, love," he repeated, locking our legs together.

"Finish... singing for me...." I whispered softly, getting a thrill when I felt the vibration of his voice as my cheek lay gently against his chest; smiling as he kept gently caressing my wrists;

_"Oh, I feel your heartbeat_ _And you're coming around, coming around, coming around_ _You gotta love somebody_ _You got, you gotta love somebody_ _You got, you got_ _Oh, I feel your heartbeat"_  
I began to slip into a comfortable darkness as I felt his warmth and love surround me; the vibration of his voice through his chest lulling me to sleep as his fading words held my heart;

_"Oh yeah, oh yeah_ _Heartbeat..."_

**Niall's P.O.V**

She was lying here, next to me after I'd taken her to a place she'd never been before. Her bare body wrapped comfortably around mine under the soft covers as I watched her sleep. She got to feel love she'd never felt before... and so did I. Sure, I'd had sex in the past, but what just happened with Channing... that was so much more. That was the first time I've actually made love to someone... and it was an amazing feeling that still radiated through my veins. I watched her relaxed face as she smiled about something in her dreams, I kissed her head gently.

Her soft breathing blew against my chest, and I buried my face into her hair as I held her to me. I could still feel her pulse on my tongue... the way it felt when she was tightening and releasing against me as she came crashing down from oblivion. The taste of her kiss lingered on my lips as I remembered each whimper she released that caused her breath to catch in her throat as she willingly traded air for pleasure.

I closed my eyes and hugged her tighter against my chest, willing this moment in time to freeze... wishing things could stay like this forever. Just me and her... no matter what, I was going to make sure we worked something out. There was no way I could simply forget about her and go back to my old Channing-less life. Despite her doubts, I would never let that happen... I couldn't. 

I looked down at her peaceful face, watching in awe as her chest rose and fell under the white sheet. Her breathing was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard, and it's the only music that made my heart ache. As we lay there, our bodies intertwined... she slept next to me and I listened to her breathe.


	20. Olive and Nilla

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I'd been awake for quite some time now, I wasn't sure how much longer I was going to have to wait for Harry to get back, but I didn't want to risk venturing out into the living room... Louis could be out there. Call me a coward... but I really didn't want to see him face to face just yet. I didn't have any clothes in here unfortunately, so I had to dig around in Harry's suitcase to find a shirt and some boxers to cover myself with. I neatly folded the clothing Louis had let me borrow and placed them on the dresser. Why do I feel so guilty? Louis is happy with Eleanor... he probably doesn't even care about what he walked in on last night.

After glancing at the clock that was sitting on the nightstand, I saw that it was going on 10:00am and I really had to go to the bathroom, so despite my nervous stomach, I went ahead and slipped out into the living room. I went ahead and grabbed Louis' clothes and headed down the hall to where his bedroom was. The door was slightly ajar so I went ahead and nudged it open and stepped into the room. His room was kind of a mess, so my inner O.C.D took over and I began straightening up a little. I threw randomly strewn clothing that was left on the floor into a nearby laundry basket and went ahead and made the bed.

After smoothing out the covers, I was about to place the borrowed clothing at the foot of the bed, but I actually held them to me and just stood there for a few seconds as I let my mind wander. I don't know why, but I felt hesitant to leave his room. After a few more seconds, I was startled when all of a sudden, a frazzled looking Louis rushed into his room, slamming the door quickly. He had his palms placed against the door and he slowly lowered his head, smacking his forehead against the unforgiving wood a few times. Okay then Louis...

Louis still hadn't turned around, so he didn't know that I was in his room; I stood somewhat awkwardly next to his bed, still holding his clothes, waiting for him to turn around and spot me. Wow, I felt like such a freak... creeping around in his room.

After a few more seconds of him laying his head against the door, he finally let out an exasperated sigh and slowly turned toward the bed. A startled look flashed over his face as he saw me standing there, but he quickly composed himself, giving me a tight smile, "What're you doing in here, Jet?" he asked, not unkindly.

I didn't say anything at first, I just looked at him for a moment as he slowly approached me, "I--I was just returning your clothes..." I trailed off awkwardly. Louis gave me a funny look and then glanced around his room, noticing how clean it was. His eyes met mine once more as he raised his eyebrow at me. I smiled sheepishly, "Sorry... I just thought I'd pick up a little for you," I said softly as he got closer to me, reaching out for the clothes I still held tightly against my chest.

"Well... thanks I guess..." he said as he took the clothes and stood there, looking at me. He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, not meeting my eyes. Wow... this felt really uncomfortable.

"Louis... I don't like this... can we not do this? Can we just go back to before?" I asked hopefully as he took a step back, inspecting my clothing. Of course I was still wearing Harry's things, so that kind of added to the awkwardness, "You have a nice time last night?" he asked, acid clear in his voice.

As he asked that question, I felt anger surge through me, "What do you care?" I asked, my voice dripping hostility. He let out a little chuckle, as he stepped up so he was right in my face.

"I don't care!" he said through clenched teeth as he glared at me. This was bullshit. Who does he think he is? He knows that I would have gladly been with him had he not been with El.

"Then why are you acting like this towards me?!" I asked, somewhat loudly as I pushed his shoulder so that he took a step away from me. I don't like when my personal space is threatened. It'd do him well to back off because both of us know that I could probably beat his ass.

He sighed and ran his hands over his face for a moment before refocusing on me, "I'm sorry... I just didn't know you were going to try to get with everyone in the band... should I warn Channing? Maybe you'll fancy Niall next...?" he asked, bitterly. My eyes grew wide at his statement and I felt like I'd had the wind ripped from my lungs... how could he say something so cruel?

"How dare you!" I screamed at him as I stepped up so that I was now in his face, "You know very well that I liked you. YOU! YOU! are the one I wanted. But you don't want me... so why do you care who I'm with?" I spat angrily in his face. I watched his jaw clench at my words and he immediately walked towards me, causing me to back up so that I was up against the wall; he didn't speak, he just stared at me as my breathing quickened.

"You can't have it both ways," I whispered harshly, "You can't reject me, but still claim me as yours!" I yelled a little louder as his face drew even closer to mine.

The intense stare he was giving me caused my breathing to hitch and I awkwardly tried to side step him but he placed both of his hands on either side of me against the wall, trapping me in.

"What are you doing, Lewis?" I asked vehemently, not even realizing that I used his nickname. As he heard me say it, I immediately saw his eyes soften as he looked at me. He shook his head slightly and took his hands away from the wall, turning away from me. I stood there for a minute as I watched him walk away; I went ahead and took a step away from the wall when I heard him speak, "I'm so confused," he mumbled, still turned away from me, his head turned down toward the floor.

He turned slightly, sitting on the bed, rubbing his hands over his face. I remained standing, somewhat hovering over him, "What?" I asked softly. He looked up at me, his blue eyes clouded in confusion, as he offered me a small smile, "I like you, Jetta. I do," he said randomly.

"... But you love El," I stated glumly. I wasn't jealous... I felt happy for them; I was always an Elounor shipper. I guess in my demented mind I thought we had something... a spark, but I think I was just fooling myself.

I tried not to make it feel like a big deal but I felt the constant flap of butterflies in my stomach as I sat down next to him, "Can we just be friends again?" I asked gently as I nudged him with my shoulder. I hate how feelings always have to get in the way... why can't things just always stay friendly and happy between everyone? I looked back up to meet his questioning gaze.

**Louis' P.O.V**

She finally looked up to meet my eyes, "Of course... Jet, I'm always going to be your friend," I said as a little smile curved her lips, "Thanks Lou," she whispered as she buried her head against my neck, hugging me tightly. I held her to me, probably a little longer than was necessary, but she eventually pulled away, placing a soft kiss on my cheek.

"I'm sorry about what I said... I didn't mean that," I whispered sheepishly as I looked down at my hands. When did I turn into such an ass? I should have never said those things to her. It's none of my business who she wants to be with. I watched as she ran her fingers through her long hair, making it tumble down her back.

"It's ok, we all say things we don't mean," she said as she stuck out her tongue and hopped up from the bed; she took my hand in hers trying to drag me off of the bed. I remained frozen in place, "Let me change first," I mumbled as she nodded her head and swept past me, heading toward the door. As she left the room, I couldn't help thinking that maybe I shouldn't have let her go. Maybe I should have just kissed her... maybe I did need to break up with Eleanor. Either way, I felt like I was losing.

 

**Niall's P.O.V**

I woke slowly to the soft strumming of a guitar. I couldn't tell where it was coming from at first, but as I pried my eyes apart and rubbed the sleep away I reached over to where Channing had been laying, only to be met with a cold, empty sheet. I sat up slowly and looked around the room, grabbing my phone from the night stand I saw that it was nearing half two. Shit... we had a concert tonight. Memories from this morning flooded back into my mind and I smiled absentmindedly as I pulled myself from the comfortable bed and sluggishly began searching my bags for something to put on. We would have to leave soon to get ready for the concert, and I still felt extremely tired.

I wandered out into the living room, still wondering where Channing had gone off too; I heard the guitar strumming a little more loudly however, and I noticed Jetta, Louis and Zayn lazing around watching some film on the telly.

"Any of yeh seen, Chan?" I asked in a gravelly voice. I cleared my throat quickly and waited for an answer. Jetta was giving me a funny smile and motioned over toward the balcony door, which was slid slightly open. I heard Louis and Jet whispering as I walked away but immediately disregarded them as I stuck my head out into the warm Saint Louis air.

I heard the soft hum of Channing's voice as she continued to play a song I was unfamiliar with, I quietly walked up behind her and watched as she stopped playing to lean over and scratch something out on a piece of paper, only to write something else in it's place. She readjusted her fingers on the strings and picked up the unfamiliar tune again. Her soft voice swept through the air and surrounded me as the lyrics fell from her mouth into a perfect melody;

_"My bones are shattered._ _My pride is shattered._ _And in the midst of_ _This self-inflicting pain_ _I can see my beautiful rescue._

_I'm falling more in love._ _With every single word I withhold._ _I'm falling more in love._ _With every single word you say._ _I'm falling head over ---"_

She abruptly stopped strumming again to scratch something else out on the paper. I softly cleared my throat; she swiftly turned her head and spotted me standing there. She gave me a shy smile and placed her guitar down as she stood to come wrap her arms around me. As she approached I noticed she was wearing one of my longer shirts and a pair of my boxers; I laughed slightly at the fact that even though she now had her own clothes here, she still chose to wear mine. Nothing wrong with that though.

The wind was causing her hair to fly around us as she hugged me tightly, "What're yeh doin out here, love," I asked gently as I placed a soft kiss on her cheek.

She gave me a sheepish grin, "I was just finishing up a song," she pulled her hands away from my shoulders and ran over to retrieve the little piece of paper she was writing on.

"Can I hear it?" I asked her, genuinely interested in hearing the song, the parts that I did hear by accident sounded really good.

She blushed slightly as she shook her head, "It's not ready yet Nilla," she said meeting my eyes. I gave her a confused look as she laughed softly at my reaction, "Nilla?" I asked, confusion evident in my voice.

She shook her head and continued to laugh as she stood, grabbing her guitar and walking back into the living room. I shut the door and turned around to see that she was already sitting on the arm of the couch next to Jetta, "Hey, Jet?" she asked, still laughing lightly to herself.

"Yeah?" she asked, drawing her eyes away from the telly.

"Do you remember what I used to call Niall when you first told me about One Direction?" she inquired was wearing an overly amused expression.

I was taken aback as Jetta suddenly burst out laughing, startling Lou as well; she covered her mouth with her hands as she tried to calm herself down, she nodded her head without speaking.

After taking a moment to compose herself, Jetta replied, "Actually, I remember that entire conversation! I showed you my poster that was on my wall and I told you each of their names..." she trailed off, laughing at Chan as her cheeks reddened, "... and after making you listen to them, I asked you who your favorite was... and you pointed to Niall and said, "That one! Nilla's my favorite! Look at him, he's so cute!" she continued laughing as she pulled Channing over so that she was practically sitting on her, and hugged her tightly.

I felt a smile tug at my lips as I watched them laugh together at the memory... I laughed a little as well. Now I've had my name mispronounced as Neil plenty of times... but Nilla, yeah, that was the first. I glanced toward Zayn and Louis who  were chuckling as well, "Awe that's so cute! I want to call him Nilla too!" Louis exclaimed as he walked over to me and ruffled my already messy hair. I gently pushed him away as Jetta called out from the couch, "Oh shut up, Lewis!"

Channing stood and walked back over to stand next to me while Louis walked over to Jetta and sat down on top of her. I tuned out their playful bickering as I focused in on Channing's cute flush, she shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah... I used to call you Nilla," she laughed as she tucked her hair behind her ears again.

"She was a total directionator!" Jetta's voice screeched from underneath Louis. Channing met my eyes and nodded her head, "Sad but true," she whispered. I smiled down at her as I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her down so that we were sitting on the arm chair together, "What made yeh think of that?" I asked as she wiggled around against me, trying to get comfortable, "I was looking through my song book earlier and I found this page where I wrote it down," she said with a shrug as she pointed to the little piece of paper she was holding. Sure enough there was the word Nilla with a heart next to it, in her pretty handwriting. I tried to snatch the paper from her hands but she pulled it away and shoved it down her shirt, apparently into her bra.

I gave her a funny look as I shook my head, "You girls... yeh just love using yer bras as spare pockets, don'chya?" I commented as Channing giggled at my observation.

"I just figured I could give you a nickname too, you know?" she asked quietly as I hugged her tighter to my side. I nodded my head in agreement, "Olive an' Nilla... I think I like how tha' sounds," I whispered, touching my lips to her ear. She shivered slightly as her eyes met mine and delivered a small peck to my lips.

We sat together watching some random film for a bit before Liam hurried into the room making us all get up and get ready for the concert. Jetta and Channing went into my bathroom to get ready, when Jetta questioned about the broken door, my eyes flashed to Channing and she subtly shook her head so I stalled for a moment to think of an excuse, "Uh.... oh.... I locked myself out an' had tah get my wallet," I stuttered, rather unconvincingly. Jetta eyed me then looked at Channing before shrugging her shoulders and letting it go.

Channing flashed me a grateful smile as I left them to get ready, heading into the living room to wait with the rest of the lads.

**Harry's P.O.V**

Things were still feeling rather strained with Louis, so as I sat down on the couch next to him, waiting for the girls, I attempted to start up a conversation, "How's Eleanor doing, Louis?" I asked, genuinely curious. Something flashed over his eyes as he met mine and gave me a tight smile, "She's fine, mate... thanks for asking," he replied. I nodded my head trying to think of something else to talk about.

After a few seconds of uncomfortable silence, Louis turned to me, "Haz... I'm sorry. Can we just forget about all of this Jetta stuff?" he asked me quietly. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders and I quickly smiled, nodding my head in agreement.

"Thank God!" Zayn whined in exasperation.

"I agree," Liam voiced, "You two've been behaving as a bickering married couple, stuck in a sexless marriage," he said, causing Louis to begin laughing. I smirked at him as well as I looked over toward Niall who had his brow furrowed as he clicked away at his phone.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I reached over to pat his back, his eyes looked up, meeting mine, "Ugh... yeh know... it's jus' some stuff I'm seein' on twi'er 'bout Chan," he said, sounding slightly deflated.

I nodded my head in understanding, as did the rest of the boys, "What're they sayin', mate?" Zayn asked gently as he came over to sit on the other side of Niall.

Ni just shook his head, looking even more pissed off by the second, "This is bullshit! Why do people hav'tah do thins' like this?" he asked as he glared down at his phone, which he eventually surrendered to Zayn. Zayn's eyes widened slightly as they absorbed whatever was on the small mobile screen, and he shook his head as he handed the phone over to Liam, who was sitting on the coffee table. Li leaned over so that Louis and I could see as well, as my eyes adjusted to the brightness and small font, I felt a  rock fall into my gut. How could people be so cruel? Liam and Louis were shaking their heads in disgust as I took the phone over and examined it more closely.

Someone had tagged Niall in a tweet that had a picture of Channing from one of her videos, it was a close up of her wrists, where you could clearly see the scars because her bracelets were slid up around her forearms. The person had zoomed in even more and circled the markings, while on the picture they wrote, "How could you be with a cutter, Niall? What kind of role model is that for your fans to see? I'm so disappointed!"

I looked down at the responses to the photograph, and although some were sweet and reassuring, surprisingly more were negative and rude:

**@KeepCalmANDfangirl @NiallOfficial seriously, that's pathetic! are you trying to encourage your fans to be suicidal attention whores?**

**@WhatILikeAboutLou @NiallOfficial oh my gawd! those scars are disgusting! Niall, what is wrong with you? You could have anyone and you choose that!??**

**@eileendover4djmalik @NiallOfficial what kind of message are you trying to send your fans? hopefully you're just with her out of pity. someone who does that to themselves doesn't deserve you. #sorrynotsorry**

I had to make myself stop reading the hateful comments that were left on the photo; who were these people to judge anything regarding Channing's situation? Sure, she's had some self-harm issues in the past, but she's a better person  than most, that I am sure of. I completely understood how Niall was feeling at the moment, and for his sake as well as Channing's, I hope this picture doesn't start circulating. Knowing our fans, it probably will... but I can only hope this doesn't become some huge discussion within the fandom. I quickly erased the tweet and blocked the person who tweeted it to him before handing the phone back.

He offered me a glum smile as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands;  we waited in a tense silence for the girls to finish. Within five minutes, Channing came out, wearing skinny jeans and a long sleeved v-neck top. Of course Jetta was the girly one so we had to wait another twenty minutes for her to finally come out. However, when she finally did, I was not disappointed. She was wearing a tight bodice like top that tied up the back, with a plunging neckline, and tight, black skinny jeans that hugged her nicely, as well as her signature high heels. She really did clean up nicely. I saw Louis straighten up in his seat out of the corner of my eye when she stepped out; I knew he had a little crush on Jetta, I just hoped it wasn't anything too serious where it could effect our friendship.

We were all just kind of staring at Jet, well all except Niall because he had blinders on for anyone besides Channing, he just really liked that raw-natural look. Don't get me wrong, Channing was beautiful, but it was a simple beauty. While Jetta offered something a little different, especially when she prettied herself all up, she was just sexy as hell. I stood up and extended my arm to her, "Shall we?" I asked. She smiled and placed her arm through mine, "Of course, good sir," she teased as we walked toward the door.

We piled into the van and were headed to the arena once more. I sat in the back row with Jetta and Zayn while Louis and Liam sat in the middle and Channing and Niall were left alone in the front. No one wanted to sit by them because all they radiated was sexual tension; if you wouldn't have known the truth, you would assume they'd been together for a lot longer than a week.

I looked around at the people all around me, and glanced down as Jetta played around on her iPod. It was crazy how the last time we'd taken this drive to the arena, we'd been trying to keep Niall calm about possibly meeting Channing, and the rest of us didn't even care or even know about Jetta.

Things can change so quickly, but there's no use in trying to fight it, or even understand it. I guess that's where Zayn get's his "rollercoaster that is life" bullshit. I chuckled lightly to myself, causing a few pairs of eyes to look at me. I shook my head and wrapped my arm over Jetta's shoulder. She smiled up at me, offering me one of her ear buds and we sat back for the short drive, listening to Staplegunned by The Spill Canvas; I began singing softly, making Jetta smile up at me again;

_"Do I have to spell it out for you_ _or scream it in your face?_ _Oh, the chemistry between us could destroy this place_ _Do I have to spell it out for you_ _or whisper in your ear?_ _Oh, just stop right there_ _I think that we've got something here"_

For some reason as I sang, I really felt like the lyrics could relate to whatever we had going on, and to be honest it was a little unnerving. I continued singing softly, so that only Jetta could hear me;

_"We were all alone when I finally made a pass at you_ _It didn't work, and no it never does,_ _but you know how I do_ _We were on the phone when I made up my mind_ _I want you staple-gunned right to my side all of the time_ _Woah"_

I continued singing for a few more lines, but was immediately stopped when the van pulled up to the arena. Paul suddenly appeared at the door and ushered us into the back entrance. I hopped out of the van, grabbing Jetta's hand so that she wouldn't fall behind in her heels and we rushed toward the door. Luckily there were no fans waiting for us so we didn't have to worry about dodging any of them.

After discussing it with the girls, we all decided that they could sit out in the audience again, and then our body guards would help them get backstage to us once the show was over. After we finished our sound check and the stylists started swarming us, trying to make us look presentable, we watched as the girls left the dressing room to be escorted to the V.I.P seating. This time, they weren't going to be placed in the front row, they were actually going to be off more towards the side on a raised platform where there were actually body guards surrounding it. You know, for safety precautions... we didn't know what our fans would think of seeing them in the crowd.

It was finally show time and we were anxious as we stood to the side of the stage, well the other boys may not have felt it, but I definitely felt a little more off than I usually did. As the count down began and we prepared to run on stage, I closed my eyes, releasing a deep breath, before running into the blinding lights and deafening screams.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I turned and smiled at Channing as we got comfortable in our seats, waiting for the boys to come on once more, "Things were so different for us the last time we were here!" I squealed in excitement.

She gave me a knowing smile, "I know! Now look at Niall and I... as well as your Larry threesome..." she trailed off with a laugh. My smile dropped off of my face as she continued laughing at my expense, "Shut up!" I laughed as I smacked her arm, probably a little too hard.

"Ow! Jetta! What the hell?" she pouted as she rubbed her arm. I pulled her in for a hug as I whispered into her ear, "Sorry, I'm just stressed about those two idiots, I guess." I said with a shrug as I rested my head on her shoulder.

"Well what's got you all stressed? Louis is still with Eleanor, Harry obviously is into you... so why not just focus on him?" she asked as she popped a piece of gum in her mouth. I quickly reached out my hand, silently demanding a piece, "I don't know... I like Harry and everything... but I feel like I click so well with Louis. He just understands me... when I'm with Harry, all I feel the need to do is make out with him. I don't feel like we connect on any other level," I mumbled as I unwrapped my own piece of gum and felt the minty, refreshing feeling flood my senses.

After my speech, Chan was silent for a second as she thought, "Well... have you really given Harry a chance? I still feel like you're caught up on Louis... to be honest, I think you need to forget about him... he's been with Eleanor for so long, Jet... you can't expect him to throw away a three year relationship on a whim," she said gently as she wrapped her arm over my shoulder.

We were silent for a minute before Channing continued, "For me... it seems like if you keep trying to get closer to Louis, he's just going to break your heart," she whispered as the count down started for the show to begin. I nodded my head... she was right after all. Maybe if I gave my full attention to Harry, then I could get over Louis. Either way, I couldn't keep bouncing back and forth between the two of them.

The screaming of the fans brought me out of my frazzled mind and back to reality as I heard the catchy melody begin for their first song;

Louis' cute little voice rang out in the beginning as the guitar grew louder,

_"Yeah!"_

Followed by Harry's rough grunting, which always made me laugh,

_"Uh huh!"_

Then Louis picked up, singing out the little phrase that everyone was so excited about then we first heard this song;

_"One, two, three, flick!"_

Harry immediately picked up the melody with his solo;

_"She sneaks out in the middle of the night, yeah_ _Tight dress with the top cut low_ _She's addicted to the feeling of letting go, oh-woah, letting go"_

I loved how Harry and Louis kind of threw their lines back in forth in the beginning of the song... it was probably one of my favorites, just because there was so much Louis in it... he is hardly ever featured in their songs. I smiled as I watched him jump up to harry to pick up the next line;

_"She walks in and the room just lights up_ _But she don't want anyone to know_ _That I'm the only one that gets to take her home, oh-woah, take her home"_

Then Liam came in with his line;

_"But every time I tell her that I want more_ _She closes the door"_

They all began moving around the stage as Zayn picked up the chorus, leaning forward and touching the fans hands;

_"She's not afraid of all the attention_ _She's not afraid of running wild_ _How come she's so afraid of falling in love?_ _She's not afraid of scary movies_ _She likes the way we kiss in the dark_ _But she's so afraid of f-f-falling in love, love"_

Every time Zayn would sing "love", they'd all jump into the chorus and harmonize together. Both Channing and I were jumping around, screaming with the rest of the fangirls. At times like this, it was easy to forget that we actually knew these boys. Seeing them up on that stage, I felt like I was looking at my idols again... not a group of boys that had now become my good friends... not to mention two I had snogged. Wow, I love using that word, it makes me feel British. I was zapped from my British terminology thoughts as I heard Niall's solo ring out through the stadium, sending a little wink to Channing;

_"Maybe she's just trying to test me_ _Wanna see how hard I'm gonna work_ _Wanna see if I can really tell how much she's worth, what you're worth"_

Louis stood next to Niall as he sang his next solo, and I didn't miss the fact that he was looking right at me when he did;

_"Maybe all her friends have told her, "Don't get closer ‒_ _He'll just break your heart"_

At that point I tuned out the other boys and was just smiling down at Louis, as he kept his eyes locked on me. I looked over at Channing to see if she had noticed that and she gave me a side glance, confirming that she did. 

**Channing's P.O.V**

I looked over, nodding at Jetta... I did notice the way Louis looked right at her when he sang his solo. Either way, I still felt nervous for her if she continued to pursue him. I watched the boys finish the song, plus three more before they took a break to speak to the audience. I looked around the arena in amazement... just last week, I honestly thought I'd never be able to see them live. Now, I've been to two concerts and have become incredibly close to Niall. I smiled down at my little leprechaun as he jumped around the stage, goofing around with the rest of the boys. His laugh radiating off the arena walls as he laughed at something someone said. I sat back, enjoying the moment... enjoying my life as I watched these boys continue on with their concert... these beautiful boys who had changed my life.

***

After the concert was over, Jetta and I huddled together as the body guards ushered us backstage. It was actually really nice to have the escort service, since we didn't have to battle our way through the love-crazed fans. Jetta and I were walking down the back hallway, approaching the dressing room, and we were still laughing at the fact that during Louis' solo of "I Would", he pointedly at Jetta as he sang;

_"Cause I can’t compete with your boyfriend He’s got 27 tattoos"_

While giving her a wink at the end; even though Harry wasn't her boyfriend, and he had far more than 27 tattoos, it was still hilarious... and awkward at the same time.

We finally got into the dressing room and were met with a bunch of sweaty, smelly boys. Ok, so they weren't smelly... they actually smelled really good; nonetheless Jetta and I were not very pleased with the fact that they swarmed us into a big sweaty group hug.

I felt a familiar pair of arms around my waist and smiled up at Niall as he hugged me to him, "Sorreh... I know I'm sweaty and gross at tha moment," he whispered against my temple as he hugged me from behind.

I turned around to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck, I bit my lip seductively, "It's ok... it's actually kind of hot... reminds me of earlier," I whispered against his ear. I felt his breathing quicken as he looked down at me, a new found lust present in his crystal blue eyes.

He put his fingers under my chin, lifting my lips up to meet his as they captured me in a kiss. I wrapped my arms more tightly around him, pressing myself even harder against his body. If I wasn't mistaken, I think I even felt a bit of growing excitement on my thigh.

I pulled out of the kiss, locking my eyes with his, as we heard someone awkwardly clear their throat, "Ok... you two seriously. You're in public," Liam whispered in a disapproving tone. We broke apart, and I started giggling softly as he wrapped his arm tightly around my waist. We were met with a bunch of eyes staring at us, not only our friends, but also a group of girls that were waiting by the door, hopeful of getting autographs and such. Their mouths were agape as they saw Niall embracing me, in which I quickly stepped away from him, putting some much needed distance between us.

I also noticed most of them had cameras out as well as their phones, and they seemed to be recording the entire exchange. Oh shit. So much for keeping out relationship on the down low.

**Louis' P.O.V**

After we signed a few autographs, we quickly fled the arena, trying to get away from the prying eyes that had witnessed Chan and Niall's little exchange. It was slightly awkward to say the least; once we had all piled back into the van, Jetta ended up sitting next to me and she was searching her phone, trying to see if there was anything about Channing or Niall on twitter.

Seriously, when are people ever going to get over the fact that we are GOING to be in relationships? I'll always love the fans, but sometimes they just got me so angry. Jetta let out a small gasp as I saw her looking down intensely at her phone, "Oh... that's great..." she whispered.

As the rest of the van leaned toward her to see what she was talking about she showed me her phone, the picture I saw however, was not the picture I had been expecting to see; it was actually a picture of Harry and Jetta, holding hands and laughing as they were running, probably before the concert. I felt my stomach do a little flip as I saw some of the comments saying how cute of a couple they were. **#Jarry** was even trending at the moment. I let out a nervous laugh as I gave her phone back to her and sat forward to look out the windshield.

"Well, apparently we're dating Princess Kitty Paws!" she hollered back to the last row where Harry had gotten stuck sitting next to Niall and Channing. He immediately started shaking his head, "Ughh! I thought you'd forgotten that dreadful name!" he groaned back. I let out an awkward laugh as I fidgeted in my seat, "NEVER!" she yelled back with her hand over her heart. I watched Harry try to hide the smirk that was forming on his lips. He had it bad for that girl... it didn't matter what the hell she called him, he'd be okay with it.

The boys and I had brought clothes to change into, so we were in our sweats, ready to get back to the hotel so we could just be comfortable and lay around. My hair was a mess so I had a beanie on and was getting ready to get out of the car as we pulled up to the back entrance of the hotel, before I could even get out of the car, I felt the hat ripped from my head and a giggling Jetta passed me as she jumped out of the van, giving me a coy smile, "Beanie's are supposed to be for BAD hair days... you flawless bitch!" she yelled as she laughed and ran away toward the hotel. The rest of the lads and Channing began laughing as they saw the look on my face, I had to stifle a laugh as well. She was so ridiculous. Fine, if she wants a chase scene, then she shall get a chase scene.

**Niall's P.O.V**

I was slightly nervous as we got back to the hotel, more so about what awful things people could be saying about Channing on twitter than anything else. I watched as Jetta ran away with Louis' beanie and laughed as he jumped out of the car, chasing her into the hotel. Those two were always flirting, I looked over to see a sad smile on Harry's face as he looked down at the ground. I could tell he really liked her... but she didn't seem to be very serious about him. I clapped my hand over his shoulder before standing up and following Channing out of the van.

We all got into the lift, well everyone except Jet and Louis... Lord only knows where they went. I just hoped they'd come back to the room soon before they got into too much trouble. I wrapped my arm around Channing as we made our way into the room; I was about to head to the kitchen in order to grab something to eat, but I felt Channing pulling eagerly on my hand, dragging me away from the fridge. I felt sad for a second, because I was seriously starving, but as soon as I took a look at her, I saw the fire in her eyes and scooped her into my arms, kicking the door shut.

Food vs. Sex? That may have been a serious decision at one time, but when it came to Channing... food was just going to have to wait. I carried her to the bed, my lips sucking her neck gently as she wrapped her legs around my waist. My lips travelled up her throat and over her jaw before meeting her soft lips, which were eager to attack mine. I smiled into the kiss as I relaxed my forehead against hers; looking into her grey eyes I knew that I would never get enough of this... I would never get enough of her.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I sprinted into the hotel, pressing the beanie to my chest as a furious looking Louis followed closely behind me. How the hell did he catch up to me so fast? I let out a little squeal as Louis almost got a grip on my jacket, but I turned down a hallway, pulling out of his reach as he groaned and continued to chase me. I kept turning down different hallways trying to lose him, almost running over a few people in the process... Oh God, we are definitely going to cause some complaints. I was breathing heavily when I came to the end of a hallway that offered me the use of the elevator or the stair well, I didn't want to risk getting caught in an elevator with him, so I quickly ran for the stairs.

Lou caught on to where I was headed and picked up his pace as he saw me struggling to push the heavy door open; the time it took me to get that damn door open is what ultimately led to my downfall. I tried to sprint in my heels up the first set of stairs, but Louis was right behind me. I felt him get a hold of my waist and tug me backward, I let out a little screech as I felt us falling backwards. I gripped onto the cold, metal handrail and was met with thud against my back as Louis caught me before I could tumble down the stairs. Awe. How considerate of him.

"Are you trying to kill me?" I yelled indignantly as I wriggled out of his grasp and stood up so that I was out of reach, "'Course not..." he said in a husky voice as he backed me into the corner. I still had his hat in my hands, but being as I'm stubborn and didn't want to surrender, I shoved the beanie down the front of my shirt, giving him a smug grin.

He laughed as well, "You really think I won't go in there and get it myself?" he asked me seriously. I shrugged my shoulders, "Yep," I said shortly as I returned his intense gaze, daring him to test me.

Lou took a step closer to me, giving me a rough shove so that my back hit the wall, standing right in front of me so that I was literally trapped in the stairwell. His eyes darkened as he looked down at me and my breath quickened as his hands crept up the front of my shirt. I didn't make a move to stop him as his fingers crawled from button to button, unsnapping each one slowly before moving on to the next. His closeness was making my head swim and I released a small moan as his fingertips brushed against my collar bone.

My hair was falling down around my shoulders and Lou looked at me as his fingers took a piece, and gently tucked it behind my ear. His breath tickled against my lips as his face drew nearer; at this point, he had my shirt undone, fully exposing my bra and stomach. I still had the beanie clutched against my exposed chest and blushed while Lou leaned forward. His lips aimed for mine, and I felt my heart racing as I stared into his hungry eyes.


	21. The Slut That Everyone Used but Nobody Wanted

**Louis' P.O.V *WARNING GRAPHIC LOVE SCENE***

I stalked toward her, shoving her somewhat roughly against the cold cement wall. We were alone in the dim stairwell, only the frantic breaths leaving our lips could be heard echoing throughout the hollow space. I wasn't entirely sure what had come over me, all I knew for sure is that I didn't want to stop. This girl was adorable as Hell, and without a doubt she could have me begging on my knees.

She was still clutching my beanie tightly against her chest, her eyes looking around frantically; I could sense that she was not going to admit defeat quite that easily. As I hovered over her, getting even closer, testing her limits, she suddenly took the beanie out of my reach, shoving it down the front of her shirt... did she really think that would stop me?

"Do you seriously think I won't go in there and get that myself?" I asked her, my voice sounding rough, probably due to the lust which was quickly invading my body.

"Yep," she stated shortly, her blue eyes turning a playful hue, as if she were daring me to get the beanie myself. I smirked down at her, my eyes not straying from her gaze as my fingers swiftly worked their way up the front of her shirt, popping the buttons open at an alarming rate.

Her shirt was now open, exposing her toned stomach and prominent chest as my fingertips brushed lightly over her collar bone, trailing down in between her breasts. I moved my lips closer to hers, stopping so that I was just a breath away from her lips, teasing her. I leaned backwards slightly just to test her out, and sure enough, whether it was intentional or not, she was leaning forward, trying to close the gap between us.

With a coy smile on my face, I quickly snatched the beanie out of her grasp, putting it back on my head, and taking a step away from her. My body immediately yearned for the loss of body heat I had just felt radiating off of her; I attempted to turn away from her, adding more space between us. I knew doing this would piss her off, so at that moment, I couldn't tell if I was trying to step away in order to be faithful to El, or if I was just teasing Jetta... begging her to chase after me.

I had a feeling it was the latter, however. As expected,  a smug smile danced across my face as I felt her grasp onto my shoulder; my heartbeat picking up significantly as I felt my own back being shoved against the opposite wall of the small stairwell. Before I knew what was happening, her hot lips were covering mine and her taut body was pressing snugly up against my own.

For a split second, I felt a seed of guilt eating away at my heart as I cupped my hands around Jetta's cheeks, pressing my lips roughly to her, sucking her tongue into my mouth, fighting her for dominance. She was so feisty, I felt my breath catch in my throat as she slowly brought her knee up so that it was resting in between my legs, right below my crotch. An unintentional moan escaped my lips, and I could feel her smiling as her expert tongue continued to manipulate mine. She tasted sweet and minty as a faint vanilla scent flooded my senses, I ran my fingers though her long hair as I pulled her closer against me.

She stole the beanie from my head once more, and I opened my eyes long enough to watch her slip it onto her own head before one of her hands swept through my hair, pulling gently, as the other wrapped tightly around my waist, tugging my hips so that they slammed passionately against her own. I turned us around, so that I was once more pushing her against the cold wall, as I released her swollen lips, trailing my tongue and lustful lips down her throat. She threw her head back, releasing a moan, as I nibbled lightly at her exposed neck. I paused for a second as I saw a fading love bite, toward the bottom of her neck, nearing her chest.

My eyes met hers and without a second thought, I brought my lips to the fading bruise, sucking the healing skin harshly in between my lips and teeth, roughly maneuvering her scorching flesh, in an attempt to erase any traces of Harry from her body. I pulled away to peek at the new darkening hickey that was slowly forming at the base of her throat, feeling a bit of pride in the fact that I had put it there.

She hitched one of her legs up over my hip and my eyes rolled back slightly as I went to grab a hold of her, only to be met with the cool skin of her bare bum that was peeking out from under her short denim skirt. I trailed my lips back up to her jaw, kissing from one end to the other before discovering her lips once more.

The air was thick with lust and my eyes widened as she hurriedly reached for my sweats, pulling them down roughly. She gave me a wicked grin with her lips as well as an innocent look with her eyes as a ragged whisper fell from her lips, "I know we only met but let's pretend it's love," she taunted, causing me to start laughing. Of course Jetta would do something like quote Live While We're Young while we're in the heat of the moment... only Jetta. As I stood there smiling, I figured "screw it"... may as well take my own advice.

I shook my head, laughing lightly as I crashed my lips against her; I hoisted her body up between the wall and my hips as I shoved her skirt higher up her waist. She hurriedly freed me from the confines of my boxers as I slipped her bra up slightly, bending my head down to suck on her breasts. She groaned and shivered as I skimmed my teeth over her exposed nipple, as I readjusted her body so that I could easily enter her. I reached under her skirt, our hands frantically getting tangled up as she swiftly pulled her thong out of the way, while my mouth still sucked gently on her breasts. She was rather busty, and I found myself becoming a bit obsessed with her boobs. 

After I felt like I paid enough attention to her heaving chest that was rising and falling rapidly, my mouth crept back up her body to tug and pull at her lips once more. I rested my forehead against hers as I met her eyes, waiting for her signal that we were really going to go through with this. I wasn't sure where this was going to leave us, but neither of us felt strong enough to stop. We were caught in a moment, all excuses aside, I knew this was something we both wanted... we both needed.

She nodded her head urgently as she squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face into my neck, "Take me, Lewis," she whispered as she continued sucking on my neck. That was all the reassurance I nodded as I lifted her hips, pushing her higher up against the wall, only to bring her down at an angle where I was easily able to slide into her warm body. I entered her somewhat quickly, drawing a gasp from both of our lips at the new intimate contact; she felt so good. A warm feeling of bliss invaded my body and my nerve endings trembled as I began rocking into her, picking up the pace with each thrust of my hips; drawing beautiful sounds out of her mouth, tickling mine as I closed my aching lips around hers.

I held tightly to her, one arm around her shoulder, while the other gripped her around the waist as I took her to new heights, and she was biting onto my shoulder to muffle her screams. Normally I would encourage her voice, but in this situation, it was probably better that we didn't draw attention. I stared down at her face, in awe of her spunk. I took a second to remember this moment; I'm not one for public exhibitionism, but Jetta seemed to have no fear, so with her I felt capable of getting away with anything. Not to mention... there was just something really hot about having sex while keeping all of your clothes on.

In that moment, I probably should have been worried about someone walking into the stairwell... I probably should have felt regretful of being unfaithful to Eleanor... I probably should have been concerned about making a move on the girl my best mate fancied... but in that moment, all I could focus on was her ragged breathing as I buried my face into her tangled hair. All I could see was her face as she closed her eyes in pleasure in which I was providing. All I could hear were her soft moans repeating my name and the sound of my body thrusting passionately against hers. All I could feel was her body tightening around my own, her hot breath on my cheek, and her nails scraping along my spine, causing a confusing combination of pleasure and pain. In that moment, in which my mind was caught in a lust filled haze, I continued sucking on the sweet skin of her neck, feeling no regret whatsoever. This is what I wanted... she was what I wanted, and it was time I stopped trying to fight it.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I locked my eyes with Louis' as I felt myself unraveling; I tried to hold back my cries of pleasure as he thrust deeply, pushing me past the point of no return. He further punished my body as he ravaged my throat, and I buried my face into is neck as I felt my back scraping against the rough cement wall with each thrust. I didn't give a shit at the time though... nothing mattered to me besides the intimacy we were sharing at the moment.

I felt my toes starting to curl and my breathing grew harsh and unsteady as he pushed me over the edge. He once again picked me back up so that I was in his arms, pushing into me aggressively. I groaned as I felt him releasing moans against my throat as well, signaling that he couldn't hold back anymore, "I'm almost there, Jet," he whispered through his labored breathing, groaning even more as he tried to hold back his own orgasm while he let me finish riding mine out. As soon as my body went slack, he pulled out of me, kissing my lips feverishly as he finished on my exposed stomach.

Now I'm not going to lie... I hate dealing with the mess that men always leave behind, but in Lou's case it wasn't so bad. After he finished and saw my dilemma, he quickly pulled off his tee shirt as well as a white undershirt he was wearing underneath, gently wiping the mess off of my stomach while giving me a cheeky smile, "Sorry about that, love," he said as he finished wiping me off. I blushed slightly and watched him jump down the stairs to toss the shirt into the trash can that was at the bottom of the stairwell.

He gave me a cheeky grin as he ran back up the steps and pulled me against him once more, kissing my lips tenderly, before slipping his lips down my neck for a few seconds. As he pulled away, pulling his shirt back over his head, I readjusted my skirt and buttoned my top. We were both still breathing heavily as we continued to come back down to earth. We awkwardly took a seat on the steps and he smiled over at me, "Okay... that was probably the hottest thing I've ever done... you're just full of surprises, aren't you?" he asked as his eyes travelled up and down my body once more. 

I shrugged my shoulders and blushed, rolling my eyes, "Yeah... that's the most fun I've ever had in a stairwell," I joked lightly. After a few moments of silence, I cleared my throat, "Where... uhm... where does this leave us, Lou?" I asked quietly. I guess I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up; I couldn't expect him to break up with Eleanor just because I'd 'given it up.' In fact, now that I had given it up, he'd probably just lose interest. That's what everyone else did.

I looked down at my hands, as he took his fingers, placing them under my chin, pulling my face up to look at him, "I'm not sure yet... but we'll figure it out, ok?" he asked me sweetly. I smiled and nodded at his implications. I readjusted the beanie on my head, giving Louis a playful smile. However, rather than snatching the hat away again, he just smiled before kissing my cheek and whispering, "It looks better on you anyway, babe."

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and I watched his eyes widen at the screen, "We've been gone for over an hour. Haz, Niall, and Zayn have sent me eight texts..." he trailed off. He leaned his phone over so I could see, and my eyes crumbled in confusion at the apparent urgency of the texts;

_Hazza (10:03pm): Seriously where r you??_

_Nialler (10:20pm): Are u and Jet alright?_

_Nialler (10:32pm): Channing's getting worried... don't even get me started on Harry._

_Hazza (10:47pm): Lou, you need to get back up to the room, NOW._

_Zayn (10:56pm): I don't mean to bug you, mate... but you really should get back here._

_Hazza (11:05pm): U two have been gone for an hour... what's the deal._

_Nialler (11:15pm): Louis, u need to get bck. Someone is here to see u._

_Hazza (11:23pm): Where in the HELL ARE YOU!_

"Sheesh, what's that about?" I wondered out loud. Louis shrugged his shoulders, "I had six missed calls too," he said with a laugh, "I wonder who's here to see me?" he seemed to question himself as he furrowed his brow.

On shaky legs, I stood up, still trying to get control over my limbs; Louis placed an arm gently around my waist, helping me back down the first flight of stairs towards the door. As we made our way to the elevator, "Will you just carry me?" I whined, pleadingly as I leaned against his shoulder. He smirked down at me, nodding his head before he bent over slightly, signaling me to jump up on his back.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and he caught my thighs, holding them tightly from behind as he entered the elevator. We waited in silence as I relaxed my head against the back of his neck, almost feeling sleepy as we approached the room.

As he entered he immediately stiffened, noticing that he had frozen in place, I looked over his shoulder in the direction he was staring only to notice a tall girl with long beautiful brown hair, brown eyes, and an inviting smile jump up from the couch and run over to Louis. My eyes widened in recognition... Eleanor.

My heart jumped into my throat as I quickly slipped off of Louis' back, stepping a few paces away from him.

"Surprise!" she gushed as she ran into his open arms.

I watched a smile take over his face as he wrapped his arms around her in an excited hug, and I felt my stomach sink, realizing that any hopes I had of being with Louis were just empty, wasted fantasies.

I didn't even realize how much I cared for him until that moment, and in that moment, I felt my heart shredding into pieces as I watched him kiss her lips, and squeeze her tightly; I guess Channing was right. I looked into the living room, meeting my best friend's gaze, knowing that she immediately saw past the fake smile I was wearing as Louis introduced me to Eleanor. My eyes dropped to the floor as they excused themselves to spend some time together across the hall. I shook my head, trying to keep myself under composure; I felt everyone's eyes on me as I calmly made my way to the back bedroom, which I knew was used by Liam. I felt bad for stealing his room, but hopefully he wouldn't mind.

As I shut the door, I turned toward the mirror on the dresser, staring at my flushed cheeks, messy hair, and watery eyes. How could I let that happen with Louis? Why do I have to act like such a whore? It'd be a lot easier if Eleanor was a bitch or something, but she was so sweet, it just made me feel worse about helping Louis cheat on her. It was all my fault... she didn't deserve that.

 I helped myself to Liam's bathroom and after squirting a glob of toothpaste in my mouth and stepping into the hot spray, I stood there with my head down, begging for the water to wash all traces of Louis away. I was back to square one, just being the slut that everyone used, but nobody wanted.

**Harry's P.O.V**

Eleanor had shown up at our door over an hour ago, hoping to surprise Louis. We were all a little hesitant to say where he was, so we just kind of left it as he would be back up to the room soon. There was a bit of tension in the air, but Eleanor didn't seem at all bothered that he wasn't back yet, so I tried to just take her lead and relax about the situation. Lou and Jet were probably just horsing around down by the pool again or something.

Finally after texting him a billion times, I heard the front door unlock and smiled as I saw Louis and Jetta enter, but felt a frown take over as I saw that she was perched on his back. I glanced at Eleanor and she didn't seem deterred in the slightest about their slightly compromising position. Rather, she ran over toward him and I watched Jetta's sad eyes slide to the floor as Louis embraced El with a look of genuine happiness on his face.

I couldn't drag my eyes away from Jetta, especially as she watched them leave the room, hand in hand so that they could spend some time together next door, because Eleanor had to leave the next morning. Even though I know that she was looking at Louis the way that I looked at her... I still felt my heartstrings pull painfully. I knew what she was going through. Caring for someone... wanting someone, who clearly wanted someone else.

However, as I continued to watch her expression change, I felt even worse for her. She looked genuinely crushed, it was a complete 180 from how happy her face looked when they first entered the room. She was glowing and smiling, however now, she just looked down, pulling the beanie off of her head, and dropping it to the floor as she began walking down the hallway, trying to keep herself from falling apart. I glanced around the room, meeting the concerned eyes of the other lads, but especially those of Channing.

"I knew this would happen," she mumbled as Niall hugged her closely to his side. She shook her head angrily, "I told her not to get any closer to him," she whispered as her eyes found mine, offering me a sympathetic look. I felt my eyes drop down to the floor, unable to hold her gaze. How close had they gotten? As far as I knew, all they were doing was harmlessly flirting. What more was going on that I didn't know about?

"What do you mean? How close did they get?" I voiced my curiosity out to anyone who was willing to answer.

"Uh..." Channing trailed off, looking at the floor. Niall picked it up for her though so she wouldn't have to answer, "I think tha's sumthin' you should talk tah Jet an' Lou about, mate," Niall said gently.

I nodded my head in understanding and looked around the room. Things just felt awkward now. It was nearing midnight and we all just decided to head off to our rooms to get some rest. We now had a two day break before our next concert and were actually planning to go camping at a camp site that was about an hour away.

I got to my feet, making my way toward the door so that I could head back to my lonely room. I looked down the hallway where Liam was headed, slightly jealous that Jetta was back there at the moment; however, I just rolled my shoulders and slipped out of the room. Hopefully if she was up to it, I'd find her sneaking into my bed again tonight. I wouldn't make any moves on her this time... I only wanted her there... I just wanted to hold her, and help her sleep.

**Louis' P.O.V**

As I saw Eleanor's smiling face, for a second I forgot about the girl that was clinging to my back. Only for a second. Don't get me wrong, I was genuinely happy to see El... but considering what I'd just shared with Jetta, I felt incredibly guilty as I looked her in the eye, smiling back at her.

I noticed Jetta quickly removed herself from my hold and stepped away, as I took a second to glance at her, I felt my heart lurch at the look on her face. She only showed her sadness for a moment though, because it was quickly replaced with a friendly smile as I introduced her to Eleanor.

I knew that El wanted to surprise me, but I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed that I wouldn't be able to spend the night talking to Jetta. The thing is, I probably should have felt guilty about cheating on Eleanor, but in all honesty, most of the guilt that weighed on me came about from seeing Jetta's deflated expression as she watched El and I walk out the front door and across the hall. I think those sad, blue eyes and fake smile would be enough to haunt me for a lifetime.

Holding Eleanor's hand, we made our way next door, and of course she pulled me into the room and immediately wanted to fool around. It only made sense, we hadn't seen each other for two months; although I know I loved her, and I did want to be with her... at the moment it just felt wrong... on so many different levels.

As she reached for the waistband of my sweats, I immediately placed my hand over hers to stop her, "El... I don't really feel so well... can you just lay with me and let me hold you?" I asked, hoping she wouldn't see past my lie.

I suppose I could have been honest, and tried sharing my feelings with Eleanor... but I kept making excuses for myself. In the end, I knew I was just being a selfish ass, not ready to let either of them go.

I was pulled from my guilty thoughts as I heard Eleanor's high voice, "Awee, babe... sure!" she smiled as she pulled me over to the bed.

"What's gotten into you, Louis? You never make the bed!" She laughed as she reached for the comforter, pulling it back and my stomach dropped as I thought of Jetta, and how she had randomly made it for me this morning.

"Yeah... I know," I mumbled as I climbed into the bed after her. As she cuddled against me and I wrapped myself around her from behind, I felt exhaustion hovering over my tired body;  as I fell asleep, all I could see were those striped clothes Jetta had worn the night before as they sat on my suitcase staring back at me.


	22. Lyric Battles and Lap Dances

Chapter 22: Lyric Battles & Lap Dances

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After the awkwardness of the evening left everyone feeling exhausted and spent, Chan and I made our way back to my... or should I say our room. Who am I kidding? She's not going anywhere anytime soon. I'm not sure how I'm going to make all of this work yet... but all I know is that even when I leave here in five days, things won't be ending between the two of us.

I followed Channing into the room and watched her as she stripped off her jeans, pulled on one of my tee shirts, and crawled under the covers. I smiled at the fact that she didn't automatically try to hide her thighs from me anymore. I knew she wasn't doing it for herself, but for me. I wanted to see her, and feel her warm skin against mine... and it just made me feel good that she didn't fight me about it anymore. I stood there for a moment watching her wriggle around under the covers, trying to get comfortable. After a few moments, her stormy eyes turned toward me and she raised her brow, "You coming, Ni?" she asked with a smirk. I nodded quickly, feeling a blush warm my cheeks as I hurried over to the bed.

After stripping down to my boxers, I climbed into the sheets behind her, pulling her close and snuggling into her long hair. I knew we were both exhausted, me especially. Not only was I drained from the concert tonight, but I was also drained from Channing... quite literally. We made love this morning and then again when we got home... well until we were interrupted by Zayn. That was quite an awkward situation, but he was actually trying to help with the embarrassment factor considering everyone (including Eleanor) was sitting in the living and could apparently... hear us.

I muffled some of my laughter by kissing Chan on the back of the neck and she slowly rolled over to face me, "What's so funny?" she asked in a sleepy voice, as she lay her cheek against my chest.

"Jus' thinkn' 'bout earlier when Zayn... walked in on us," I mused. She pulled her cheek away from my chest and glared up at me, "Please... Nilla... tell me, what was so funny about that? I thought I was going to die from embarrassment," she whispered, squeezing her eyes closed, as if she were trying to forget it entirely. I trailed my fingertips lightly down her arm, trying to soothe her, before pulling her hand up to my face and kissing her palm.

"Babe, don' worreh about it... he didn't see anythin'," I said trying to reassure her. She opened her eyes wide, again, and I swear I could feel her cheeks burning as the warmth seeped into my exposed skin. I was now hiding my smile by covering my mouth with her hand, as I continued kissing it.

"Just stop talking," she said with a cute laugh as she slapped me on the forehead before retrieving her hand and pulling the covers over her head. I was laughing softly with her, because that was honestly not true, when he barged in... we were in quite a compromising position; as in I was laying down and she was on top... fully exposed. When he came in I quickly flipped us over and brought the blanket over us, but I mean really... he probably saw everything. Why the hell didn't we lock the door?

"Love, it's alright... they're yer friends as much as mine now... they won't bring tings like tha' up to embarrass yeh on purpose," I reassured her as I stroked her cheek gently, "Well... jus' thank yer lucky stars it was Zayn tha' came in and not Louis... then I couldn't make any promises," I added on as an afterthought. Louis had a bad habit of taking things a bit too far at times.

She sighed deeply, kissing me tenderly on the lips before rolling over and taking it upon herself to wrap my arms around her waist... not that I wouldn't have done that anyway. My hands wandered under the hem of her shirt and rested comfortably against her warm, soft stomach. I felt her involuntarily shiver as my fingertips lightly stroked the soft skin just below her belly button. I dipped my fingers down a little lower, teasing her slightly, as I pressed my lips to her sweet spot on the back of her neck. I sucked her skin between my lips, nibbling gently, before pulling away and blowing on the wet spot, giving her another set of chills.

Even though I could tell she was sleepy, my actions caused her to wriggle her backside, provoking thrilling sensations for me as she moved against my crotch. As one hand teased her by gently caressing between her thighs, my other hand slid up, cupping her breasts.

After a few seconds, I realized I was getting myself a little too excited... and I knew she wasn't up for another go, so I reluctantly slid my wandering hands back so that they were resting innocently around her waist. Trying to think of anything besides her naked, withering body in hopes of calming myself down.

"Why'd you stop?" she asked in a husky voice, although she sounded completely beat.

"It's ok baby... you're sleepy... we'll have plenty of time for that later," I whispered as my lips found their way to her cheek, leaving a soft, wet kiss. I entwined my fingers with hers and hugged her closely against my chest.

As we lay there, our breathing growing slow and steady a new thought came to my mind, which quite honestly scared away any idea of sex or sleep I may have been holding on to, "Hey Chan?" I asked suddenly, nudging her shoulder lightly with my chin. How could we be so stupid?

"Hmmm?" came her tired reply, I moved some of her hair out of the way to see that her eyes were still closed.

"Babe, we've had sex twice now without protection... aren't yeh worried?" I asked her seriously, trying not to freak out. I'd always used a condom in the past... but something about Channing made me not even want to bother with that... I wanted to feel her... all of her.

She shook her head slightly, "No... I get the shot... read my... letters," she mumbled, immediately her breathing evened out and I knew she was asleep again.

What is she talking about? What does that have to do with anything? I looked down at the sleeping girl in my arms, still confused over her reply. After a few seconds of lying there, unable to fall asleep, I kissed her temple before rolling out of the bed and knelling over next to the night stand. I retrieved the four remaining letters, glancing over them before grabbing the next one that was in line for me to read. I crept over to the little arm chair in the corner, using my phone as a flashlight, and sat down to read another of Chan's letters. I swallowed loudly, hoping I wouldn't have to read anymore like the last one;

_"May 5th, 2013_

_Dear Niall,_

_I'm so so sorry about my last letter... please don't hate me. I was in a really bad place at the time... I mean, I still am... but I think I feel slightly more capable of handling my emotions at the moment. When I wrote you last week... I was probably at the lowest point in my life that I've ever been, but now... I feel a little better, not good... but I do feel better._

_Jetta knows about everything... well not everything. I just let her think that was the first time. She didn't need to know about the other time, but I just feel better that someone knows... someone that cares about me. Even if I have no one else... at least I've got that girl in my life._

_I'm so sorry about what I did Niall. I thought I was stronger than that. I thought I was better than my father. Obviously, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. As I sit here I try to tell myself that I won't do it again... but the sick thing is, I want to cut right now. I'm so fucked up. Let's just say that I don't want to necessarily kill myself right now... but if I were to walk into traffic and get hit by a car, I would welcome death._

_Wow. I don't even know why I'm bothering with these letters anymore. All I do is whine and bitch and moan about everything. When Jetta found me, she took me to her mother to clean me up... we said that I cut myself when I dropped a vase. Yeah, I don't know how she bought it either. I rested at Jetta's house for two days before I had to come back home... well I won't call it home. Before I had to come back to Hell._

_While I was with Jetta, we went to the clinic and I got checked out. We'd told the receptionist that I'd recently become intimate with my boyfriend and I just wanted to get a check up. It was the hardest lie I've ever told. She also asked if I was interested in birth control; at first I almost immediately wrote her off, but after thinking about it for a moment, I decided that would probably be a safe thing for me to look into. After discussing all the options, I chose to go with something called Depo-Provera. It's a shot that I have to get into my arm every three months and it's like 99% effective. Here's a fun fact about me Niall... I don't mind needles. I really don't. I guess I'm just a weirdo._

_After talking with Jetta, we decided that would probably be best for me to get... you know, just in case. It costs about $40 per injection, so Jet has offered to help me scrounge up some money for the first shot. I have an appointment to get it next week. I guess I'm happy about it... because at least I know, if it happens again, I won't have to worry about pregnancy. I could never imagine creating a child with someone under those circumstances... it would be terrible._

_Jetta has helped me work out a system of code words with her... so any time I need help I just say a certain word and she knows what's going on at my house. The other day, Jeff tried to sell me to two new men, but I hid in my closet until Jetta came and helped me sneak out the window then took me to her place... I have a feeling that won't be the only time it happens either. Niall, please pray for me. I don't know if there's a God... but I need something in my life to keep me here... I need someone... anyone to prove that my life is important. I can't do this alone anymore._

_Love, Channing."_

I felt my shoulders relax and a sigh of relief escape my lips... thank God. I was incredibly happy that she was being responsible, even though it's horrible that she had to do that because she was terrified of getting pregnant from a rapist. I shook my head to clear the disgusting thoughts. I could actually feel my eyes growing weary... but as I was about to fold the letter up to put it away, something on the letter beneath it caught my eye. I went ahead and grabbed it from the drawer and hurried back over the chair in the corner, shaking my head slightly to wake myself up;

" _May 15th, 2013_

_Dear Niall,_

_I just want it all to end. I have had enough._

_I just want to be loved... is that too much to ask? I just want to have someone to hold my hand at night as I cry, and tell me that 'it's alright'... but most of all, I just want to lie in bed, and feel someone lying next to me... breathing next to me._

_I'll never be able to have that though... because I'm too afraid. Men now terrify me... today I took the elevator when I was at the hospital so that I could get my shot. I stepped on and a man in his mid twenties got on behind me. I about had a panic attack... he was looking at me like I was crazy... but I seriously couldn't even breathe. It was terrible. I knew he wasn't going to hurt me... but my mind just kept spazzing out, telling me that I needed to get away. I felt so trapped in that damn elevator... I think I'll just take the stairs from now on._

_I am just not normal anymore. My mind is warped and perverted. I'm afraid of my own fucking shadow. When did I get so weak? I thought I was strong but... how can I be strong when I literally can't even look a man in the eye._

_It's gotten to a point where I can barely make it a day without cutting. Jetta hates it... she yells at me every time she sees a new cut. I find that I'm desperately trying to hide the cuts from her... nothing feels worse than when she starts crying because I've cut myself again,"_

I stopped reading for a moment as I glanced over at the sleeping girl in my bed, tangled in my blankets... hogging my pillow. Is that why she gave me that terrified look when Jetta asked about the door earlier? Should I have mentioned her cutting to Jet? I stood and hesitantly wandered over toward the bed, staring down at Chan... watching her as she slept.

Her chest rose and fell evenly under the blankets, and I pushed a stray lock of hair away from her forehead. I leaned down, noticing her lips we formed into a perfect, adorable pout. I was just going to press a soft kiss to her cheek, but as I came closer to her face, marveling at her full lips, I couldn't help but to brush my own lips gently against hers. There was something oddly thrilling about kissing her when she was in this unknowing state; I didn't want to be creepy, so I after a few seconds of placing my mouth to hers, I pulled away, watching with amusement as she wiggled her nose because her skin obviously noticed the tickle of my lips. A gentle sigh escaped her lips, and she reached her arms out, seeking me out while she slept.

I smiled, making sure to stay silent, as to not wake her. As I pulled away, offering her the pillow to hug tightly against her chest. As I watched her roll into the pillow, I knew I'd made the right choice of keeping that little episode between the two of us. Channing trusts ME. I can't betray that trust she has in me. I can take care of her... I can be that person that she was hoping for in all of those letters... I want to be that person more than anything. I rubbed my eyes for a moment before holding my phone over the letter in hopes of finishing it so that I could crawl back into bed with that woman that made me weak;

" _Earlier this evening I was cooking dinner... and Jeff came in yelling about something or other. Well, as I was washing the dishes, quickly so that I could flee back to my room, he came up behind me, draping his hands on my waist he whispered, "When's it going to be my turn, Chan?" As if my body was some kind of fucking carnival ride. I shoved him off and tried to leave the kitchen, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me back. When I glared at him, I noticed he wasn't even looking at me, but at my wrists. I didn't have my bracelets on at the time so the scars were completely out in the open._

_I watched his face as he looked them over carefully for a minute... at first I could have sworn I saw shock flash across his face, but he quickly covered it up as he smirked at me, "Channy trying to get some attention?" he asked in a patronizing tone._

_I looked at him with disgust, "I hope it fucking haunts you until the day you die that YOU are the reason for the scars on my body,"  I whispered through clenched teeth as I ripped my arm free of him and hurried away, running to the staircase._ _As I glanced back, his face looked expressionless, and I really didn't know what to make of it. Did he feel bad because he knew I was cutting because of him? After I got up to my room and shoved the chair under my door, I cleared those thoughts from my mind... Jeff has no conscious._

_All I know is since that day, he's been drinking even more heavily and becoming even more violent. I'm not safe here... I know I'm not... but I've no where to go. I hope someone will just take me away someday. That'd be nice, wouldn't it? Too bad life isn't like a fairy tale... I have to constantly remind myself of that._

_It's so depressing that I've never had any intimate contact that wasn't forced on me... tonight I was watching The Notebook and the love scenes were making my heart ache but at the same time they were making me sick. I hope someday I'll find someone that I'm not afraid to let touch me. I'm tired Niall... off to bed now, where I can hopefully dream of you._

_Love, Channing"_

I smiled to myself as I finished the letter... knowing that Channing never acted afraid whenever I touched her... if anything she encouraged it. I looked at the last two letters that I had yet to read, and decided to pack them away for another day. I silently slipped the papers back into the drawer and crawled back under the blankets, wrapping my body around hers, surrounding myself in Channing. Her hair, her scent, her skin... surrounding myself in the girl that I loved.

I looked again at her peaceful face, brushing more of her wandering locks away. I brought my lips to carefully hover over her ear, "You've got me now. I'm going to take you away, sweetheart," I whispered, hugging her close, my breathing grew slow to match her steady pace. The last thing I remember before surrendering to the darkness was Channing's hand, interlocking with mine and squeezing it gently, as if she had heard my whispered promise.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Liam's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Hesitantly, I walked back to my room, unsure if Jetta was going to be welcoming of my company. If she wanted to be left alone, I was more than fine with sleeping in the living room; I just really wanted to check on her. I don't know what happened between her and Louis tonight,  but something must have because when he left with Eleanor, Jet looked absolutely gutted.

I knocked gently on the heavy oak door; after waiting a few moments with no response I hesitantly nudged the door open, slipping quietly into my room. I looked around, but it wasn't hard to guess where she was once I heard that the shower was on.

I sat on my bed, laying my arms behind my head as I waited for her to come out. My phone buzzed in my pocket and after sighing, I lazily grabbed my mobile, holding it up to my face as I tried focusing on the small screen. As I looked at it, I felt my heart stop. This... this couldn't be real. I opened the lock screen and checked my messages, and sure enough, I had a new unread text from a number I hadn't used in a while... from a name I hadn't seen flash across the screen in quite some time.

_**Dani:** hi. xx_

Two little letters... that's all she said. I wasn't sure if I should be jumping for joy, or be slightly offended that the first thing she said to me in nine months is "hi." I wasn't sure what to make of it. I didn't want to dwell on it too much longer or I'd end up sending her a text back that was probably three paragraphs long, so I settled for the subtle approach;

_**Liam:** hi :)x_

After sending the text, I laid there staring intently at my phone... begging for her to text me back. After about five minutes passed, I almost assumed she had sent it to me on accident. I ran my hands roughly over my face as I continued waiting on Jetta to come out. After another minute or so of watching the ceiling fan spin around in slow circles, my phone startled me as it buzzed again;

_**Dani:** Liam... I miss you... hope the tour is going well xx_

As I read the simple sentence that Danielle sent, I felt like my soul was slowly unwinding. Every time I'd tried to contact her over the past year, she'd shut down my advances. She kept saying the split would be easier if we just cut off all contact; to be honest, those first two months without her were absolute torture. Of course it did get easier over time... but only because my body produced this new sort of "numb" feeling... like I wasn't happy or sad... I was just numb.

I sat up in excitement as I pondered what I could possibly send back to her without sounding like a lovesick stalker. As I sat there trying to think of something witty or romantic to say, my mind ultimately drew a blank, and I just continued on the simple route;

_**Liam:** I miss u 2 Danielle x_

As soon as I'd hit the send button, the bathroom door flew open, exposing a red faced, puffy-eyed Jetta. I stared up at her as the steam created from the shower rolled out of the bathroom and danced around us. I took one look at her, and I could already see that her face looked tortured, and her eyes slowly welled up with tears as she began to sniffle.

"Liam...." she whispered in a broken voice, "what am I going to do?" she cried as she held the plush white towel up around her still wet body. My eyes softened as I noticed her teeth were chattering slightly, so I jumped up, ushering her over to her suitcase. She just stood there, staring at the luggage without making any move to pick out her clothing, so I took it upon myself, grabbing the necessary items, handing them to her, and urging her to get dressed.

I turned away, offering her privacy as she dressed; as soon as she was decent, she cleared her throat gently and I faced her once more as I patted the spot on the bed next to me, encouraging her to come sit.

"What happened, love?" I asked her gently, wrapping my arm around her shoulder in a friendly gesture.

She shook her head back and forth as she sat down, slumping her shoulders, "I'm so stupid. I'm such a bad person..." she whispered so quietly I thought I'd imagined it.

"Hey," I said urgently as I took her chin in between my fingers and forced her to look up at me, "don't say that. Tell me what happened, Jet, you can trust me," I assured her, rubbing my hand up and down her back.

"I slept with him, Liam," she said forcefully through clenched teeth, not meeting my eyes. I watched as a single tear fell down her cheek after her revelation, "I'm such a slut," she continued, her head slumping forward so that her hair covered her face. I'll admit... I was a little taken aback by the bluntness of her statement. When in the hell did they do that? Not to mention where?

I shook my head as I got down on my knees, resting my elbows across her thighs so that I could easily look up at her, since all she seemed to want to do was stare at the ground. My technique worked, because her eyes didn't leave mine as I spoke, "Jetta... it's going to be alright, sometimes we do things we regret---" I began saying, but she cut me off, "I don't regret it," she said simply, crossing her arms over her chest as she bit absentmindedly on her bottom lip.

"Then why are you upset?" I asked, curious of her answer. Resting my chin on my palm, I continued staring up into her misty blue eyes.

"I like him... but I wish I didn't," she said softly. As another tear slid down her cheek, quickly gliding off of her chin and disappearing into her hair that was loosely draped over her right shoulder. I stood up from my spot, pulling her into a hug; after embracing her for a few moments, I released her and helped her crawl onto the bed.

"Do you want to sleep here?" I asked her. "Do you mind if I stay?" I quickly added on at the end. She nodded her head and slipped under the blankets. We lay side by side, staring up at the ceiling before I felt her warm grasp on my hand. I looked over at her and smiled; what Jetta needed was a friend to hold her right now, and I was more than happy to do that. I knew she was torturing herself over the situation, so I cuddled her into my arms and let her sob softly against my shoulder. After a while she stopped crying and I felt my heavy lids closing, despite my protests.

**Jetta's P.O.V**

I'd been laying in Liam's bed for the past two hours, and I'd barely kept my eyes shut for more than five minutes. He'd fallen asleep ages ago, and I felt bad that I kept tossing and turning all over the place. I couldn't help but feel like I was disturbing him.

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand, seeing that it was 2:07 am, which caused me to quietly groan. I was so tired, but my mind wasn't letting me power down, it was the most frustrating thing in the world. I continued laying there staring at the wall, and after awhile, my eyes found the clock again, noticing it was 2:19am; I silently crept from the unfamiliar bed and made my way towards the door. Before leaving, I quickly turned and tiptoed back over to where Liam lay wrapped up in his duvet. I smiled down at him, leaning over to give him an innocent kiss on his cheek. He was so sweet and understanding when I just needed a friend.

I hurried back over toward the door; after taking a deep breath, I turned the knob and slipped out of the room. I'd been able to sleep next to Harry for the past two nights, so God help me, I was going to sleep there again tonight... if he would have me. I felt my stomach drop at the thought of him kicking me out of his room... would Lou have told him what we did? Just last night, Harry had been so sweet to me, telling me the reasons why he liked me... and I just threw it all out the window.

I grabbed the spare swipe card that Harry and Lou left over here, in case we needed into their room; found it quite convenient when I needed to sneak next door. God... I'm such a creep. After quietly trying to open the door, I stealthily made my way toward the room that I knew a sleeping Harry would be hiding within. I barely tapped my fingertips against the door, before turning the handle and sneaking into the warm room.

I spied his large figure, nestled in his pillows, sleeping soundly; my mind flashed back to images of Harry and I fooling around, tangled up in the sheets. A strange fluttering tickled within my chest as I slowly stepped closer to the bed. I felt so bad... he probably didn't want anything to do with me now.

As slowly as I possibly could, I crept under the blankets, scooting in close to his body, wrapping my arms around his naked torso. My heart was beating rapidly as I felt his hands grasp mine, leaving them resting against his toned abs. At first I thought it had just been an action he did absentmindedly in his sleep, but I felt a gentle squeeze, signifying he knew of my presence. I waited anxiously, seriously worried that he would push me away.

My eyes widened as he slowly rolled over, my heart was beating in my throat as his emerald eyes opened to look intensely into my own. I was a little perplexed as I saw his facial expression curve into a happy smile; releasing a sigh of relief, I smiled as I felt him tug me against him, burying his face in my hair. He slowly looked up, meeting my gaze, and resting his forehead against my own, "I was wondering when you were going to get here..." he trailed off in an extremely sexy, gravelly voice.

My breath caught in my throat as I felt him rest his cheek gently against my chest, hugging me tightly as he trailed his fingertips against my exposed back where my tee shirt had ridden up. He could obviously feel that I was tense, so he continued rubbing abstract shapes against my skin, slowly causing me to relax my shoulders and hug him back, "Thank you, Harry," I whispered, sincerity apparent in my trembling voice.

He looked up at me for a moment, studying my face before he spoke, "I've been the only one to help you get the sleep you need. Jet, no matter what... just know I'll be here," he mumbled against my chest as he continued looking up at me, "Just think of me as your ready and willing pillow," he added on with a cheeky grin. The sudden appearance of his dimples were making my inner fangirl hyperventilate.

I scoffed as I peered down at him, "Well... I think you're using me as the pillow right now..." I said with a laugh. He grinned up at me again, "Well, can you blame me? You've got a legit set of pillows..." he trailed off as he purposely rolled his head back and forth across my breasts. I rolled my eyes and smacked him on the head as he continued burrowing his face into my chest. I continued laughing silently for a few seconds, until we eventually lay in a comfortable silence.

I smiled as I ran my hand through his mop of curls, combing them back as they splayed across his forehead. He began humming as he adjusted our bodies so that I was lying against his chest, using him as a pillow once again. The humming reverberated in his chest, and the gentle sound soothed me, rapidly pulling me into the darkening depths of slumber. Thank God for Harry Styles.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Zayn's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The next morning was slightly awkward to say the least. After witnessing the situation that happened involving Louis and Jetta last night, it was safe to say that they were trying to steer clear of one another. We were hurrying around, running into each other as we made sure that we weren't forgetting anything. Liam decided that we should get an early start so that we wouldn't get caught in traffic, because honestly...  no one wants to be trapped in a car with a bored and stir-crazy Louis.

We were all heading toward the back entrance, Niall and Channing were dragging behind as usual; as everyone was climbing into the van, I watched in amusement as Liam looked around and huffed in frustration... we seemed to be missing two members of our party.

"What in the bloody hell is taking them so long? They were right behind us!" he exclaimed in exasperation.

I hopped out of my comfortable window seat, patting Liam on the shoulder, "Calm down mate, I'll get them," I assured him as I started jogging back into the building. I heard audible groans from all of the crabby, tired bodies waiting in the van.

I rushed down the hallway, headed toward the lobby steps, when some muffled giggling caught my attention, causing me to turn around and check my surroundings. I started shaking my head as I saw Chan and Niall standing up against the wall, partially hidden behind some decorative plants.  I slowly approached them, smirking as I heard Channing's raspy voice, "Niall stop... they're waiting on us," she giggled again.

As I got closer, I saw Niall trailing his mouth down Channing's throat; he dropped their bags to the ground and pulled her hips to him so that they slammed up against his own. I held in my laughter as I gently cleared my throat, however, they took no notice of me and Niall continued to push her up against the wall, his lips now attached to hers. I wanted to seriously get a video camera to capture this moment, because seriously, who the hell is this guy and what did he do with our Niall?

I cleared my throat a little more forcefully, finally gaining Channing's attention; I chuckled as her eyes grew wide when she spotted me standing there. She gently nudged Niall away from her, and I heard him mumbling obscenities as he turned to face me. Both of their cheeks grew a little rosy as I spoke, "Aye... you think you can wrap this up and maybe hold out until you two are in your tent tonight?" I hinted with a wink.

Niall rolled his eyes while Channing gave me an embarrassed smile; a new idea slipped into my head as I quickly approached Chan. She looked at me questionably as I came near and reached out for her waist, releasing a small squeal as I put her over my shoulder.

"What the hell?" Niall whisper-yelled as I spun on my heel and hurried away. It was too much fun messing with Niall...

"Better grab those bags mate, I figure if I take your toy you'll hurry your ass up," I called over my shoulder as I felt Channing giggling softly. I heard him let out an aggravated groan as I left him to pick up their numerous bags and suitcases.

It was only a few seconds when I heard him catching up to me, we were almost to the exit when I heard Channing's amused voice, "Ni! My purse!" she yelled out.

I turned as I nudged the door open with my foot, laughing as Niall groaned again and sped back down the hallway to retrieve the forgotten bag. Channing was still laughing as we reached the van, the door flying open as I lowered her back down to her feet. Everyone was giving us a confused look as Niall kicked the back door open and approached me with a pissed off look; he tossed the bags inside the vehicle as he wrapped his arms around Channing's waist and glared at me, "Mine! Don't touch my shit," he said, trying to sound menacing, causing everyone including Channing to burst out in laughter.

She turned to face him before climbing into the van, "You have such a way with words... I really feel the love, Niall!" she said mockingly. He cracked a smile as he helped her up and they sat down in the front row, completely snatching my window seat. After I jumped in, I slammed the door and grabbed the seat next to Channing. Liam spoke up from behind me as I buckled my seatbelt, "What was the hold up?" he questioned the three of us.

I could imagine Channing's reddening cheeks as I informed him, "Oh you know... just found these two snogging behind some decorative bushes," I said casually. The majority of the people in the van began snickering, all except Channing and Niall of course. I just watched with a small smirk as he wrapped his arm around her and she lay her head on his shoulder. Despite giving them a hard time, I was actually insanely happy for them. They fit so well together, and I'd never seen Niall so bold or confident... it was as if she brought out the best in him.

Louis, who was sitting behind the steering peeked back at us in the rearview mirror, "Ugh... it's 6:30 in the morning... much to early for that nonsense," he said as he clicked his tongue in disapproval. He caught my eye and I saw the playfulness behind the comment before he looked away. I glanced to my right to find Eleanor was sitting behin Niall, I had to do a double take before I realized I wasn't seeing things, "Hey, thought Louis was takin' you to the airport this morning?" I asked, trying to sound polite. I loved El, I was just curious as to why she was still with us.

"I was able to move some things around so I could go camping with you guys," she gushed excitedly. I nodded my head, smiling at her. Louis again caught my eye in the rearview mirror and I noticed some reluctance in his gaze before he focused again on the road. That's when I noticed that Jetta was sitting in the front passenger seat, crossing her arms over her chest and staring out her window... this was bound to be an exciting trip.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As Niall and I lagged behind the rest of the group, he kept being cheeky and squeezing my sides and poking me... inappropriately. Just as we were nearing the exit I playfully grabbed his ass and I was startled when he suddenly tugged me behind some plants near the drinking fountains. He gently pushed my body up against the wall, playfully burying his nose in my neck and trying to blow raspberries, while digging his fingers into my sides.

I tried muffling my laughter by biting down on his shoulder, which only caused him to emit a low moan as he pressed his lips to mine, offering me a soft, gentle kiss. I felt him pressing his body against mine as he ran his hands through my hair, tugging gently as he twirled some long locks around his fingers. Although I would have loved to continue on with this, I didn't want to keep everyone else waiting, "Niall, stop... they're waiting on us," I tried to object as he continued to suck gently on my neck. Okay, I'll admit I wasn't putting up much of a fight... but would you? Yeah... didn't think so.

I was startled when I heard someone clear their throat, instantly feeling a blush swarming my cheeks as I looked up to meet the amused eyes of Zayn. I awkwardly nudged Niall, trying to get him to turn around. After he made a comment making me blush even more, Zayn then swiftly threw me over his shoulder and hurried away from Niall, enticing him to hurry up by stealing me away.

I looked up to meet Niall's frustrated gaze as he was left to carry all of our bags to the car alone, laughing silently at his apparent jealousy and aggravation. That boy, I swear.

***** (Play the video to the right "Fuck U Over" by The Summer Set)**

Once we were all settled in the van, I leaned my head on Niall's shoulder, trying to ignore everyone that was trying to embarrass us; it didn't really bother me because I knew they were just playing, but I felt especially awkward when I met Zayn's eyes, considering he got an eyeful when he walked in on Niall and I last night. Zayn was so sweet though and didn't mention it to anyone... Zayn's my new favorite... aside from Niall of course.

As I snuggled against Niall's warm embrace, I notice that Louis kept sneaking glances at Jetta, who was ignoring him in the passenger seat. I still had yet to talk to my best friend about the previous night, so I grabbed Niall's phone, sending her a text. As I stealthily slid the phone from his grasp, he gave me an odd look, but just nodded and kissed me on the nose.

_**IrishMofo:** Hey it's Chan... what happened last night bby?_

I sent her the text and tried to remain inconspicuous as I waited for her reply. I saw Jet typing on her phone, turning slightly to offer me a small smile. I knew she was uncomfortable with having to sit next to him, but Jetta got really bad car sickness if she was in the car any longer than hour. The only way she doesn't get sick was if she sat in the front seat. The atmosphere was rather thick considering Eleanor was in the back seat... I wonder what she thought of Jetta; anyone could tell that Lou and her were acting strange toward one another.

I was pulled back from the midst of my wandering mind as I felt Niall's iPhone vibrating in my hand. I could tell he was trying to offer me privacy, because when I looked up, he was resting his chin on his palm as he looked away from me, watching the cars that passed by. I snuggled closer to him as I peered down at the message;

_**Jet:** Long story short... I took it 2 far with Louis last night. When I say 2 far... I mean all the way. He told me we would try to work something out... that maybe he'd talk to Eleanor about their relationship, then as soon as he sees her he just runs off into her arms? im so pissed off but mostly just at myself... u were right, I should have listened._

I looked up again sadly, but Jetta was just busy attaching her iPod to the dock that was plugged into the outlet of the stereo. I noticed Louis watching her curiously as she finished attaching it and sat back, her feet on the dashboard as she absentmindedly clicked through the songs on her iPod.

"Pick something good, Jetta!" Harry called to her from the backseat where he was having a conversation with Zayn and Eleanor. Liam was resting his head against the window with his eyes closed, not bothering to converse with anyone. Hmm... that's not usually like him. I shrugged my shoulders and looked back at Niall's phone, trying to decide what to say back to Jetta.

_**IrishMofo:** im sorry jetta :( don't blame yourself, he shouldn't have lead you on. I love Louis, but he's being selfish... hes trying to hold on to both you and El. this damn boyband is so dramatic... o.O we'll show him what he's missing ;)_

I sent the text with a smile, I had nothing against Louis, and I absolutely loved Eleanor... but he should have put a stop to the flirting long ago. If he's happy with Eleanor, he should have never been so into Jetta. I would never do that to Niall, and I pray he'd never do it to me. I put Niall's phone in my bra, considering I was wearing leggings and didn't have pockets; he noticed and gave me a cheeky grin as he shook his head at my actions, "Don't be jealous of the phone, babe," I teased as I snaked my arm around his waist, creeping under his shirt and gently scraping my nails up and down his back. He released a content sigh, winking at me as he subtly placed his hand on my upper thigh, squeezing it gently.

"Guys..." I heard Zayn sigh in exasperation, "I'm sitting right here... ," he whined as he shook  his head. Niall and I looked up at him, feigning innocence, "Oh hey mate, din't see yeh there," Niall replied nonchalantly. I held in my laughter as Zayn further turned away from us, pulling his hood over his head, resting his head on the back of the seat. As Niall and I continued to playfully terrorize Zayn, I heard a song blare on the stereo... apparently Jetta had made her choice.

_"You and me and this decision,_ _It's more than just a headache._ _Why ruin today? Don't bring it up._ _It's just something we've gotta deal with._ _We all saw it coming._ _For now let's just pretend_ _To be the best attempt at best friends."_

The van got unusually quiet as we listened to the song, Jetta again crossed her arms over her chest. She gave Louis a pointed look before turning her gaze out the window.

_"Follow the leader until they stray._ _The getaway,_ _The things that stick._ _If this is how you're gonna be,_ _Then I think you should go away._  
 _You're a rock star._ _Tune out then tune back in._ _If this is how you're gonna be,_ _Then you're not human,_ _You can't be human."_

You could almost taste the growing tension that was radiating from the two people in the front seat. I didn't miss the glare that Louis shot at Jetta, but she just continued to ignore him as she stared out the windshield. I could see a little smirk forming on her lips though, and I couldn't help but smile a little as well. Jetta was such a butthead sometimes... but that's why I loved her.

_"Isn't it a little late for a riddle,_ _'Cause you claim to be an open book?_ _Some might call you complex,_ _But I'm just hearing nonsense._  
 _It's nice to meet you, not nice to part;_ _Nice goes a long way in a forgiving heart._ _You used up your chances._ _Go find someone else to ruin._  
 _I think you're ugly on the inside."_

Harry started laughing loudly at the last line in the song, causing Louis to glance at him through the rearview mirror, and when I say glance... I mean glare. We'd been on the road for about thirty minutes, so everyone was awake by now, even Liam. He seemed to be smirking as well when I turned around to look at him. Awe... poor Louis. Everyone knew Jetta picked this song for a reason, well everyone besides Eleanor who was completely oblivious. Poor girl.

_"The getaway,_ _The things that stay._ _If this is how you're gonna be,_ _Then I think you should go away._ _You're the rockstar._ _Tuned out, come tune back in._ _If this is how you're gonna be,_ _Then you're not human,_ _You can't be human._ _You're just not human._ _Yeah, you're not human._  
 _Please getaway from the things that stick._ _If this is how you're gonna be,_ _Then I think you should go away._ _You're such a rockstar!_ _Tuned out? Well tune back in!_ _If this is how you're gonna be..."_

I could see Louis tightening his hands on the steering wheel, obviously trying to keep his calm. We listened on as the song came to a close, at least we did until we came to a red light and Louis snatched the iPod from Jetta's grasp, abruptly ending "The Getaway" ...  
 _"The getaway, yeah..._ _You're such a rockstar!_ _Tuned out? Come tune back in!_ _If this is how you're gon--"_

Jetta glared at him as she tried to reach over and steal the device back but he turned his back on her, quickly scrolling through the song choices. Welp... let's see what Louis' got to say about that! I heard Niall chuckle, "Ohh... fighting via song lyrics... I guess this is tah beh expected with these two, aye?'" he whispered, squeezing me even closer to his side. I muffled my laughter, holding my hand over my mouth. Louis and Jetta were so alike. They were immature, selfish, and obnoxious, and even when in a tense situation, they still managed to make it funny without even meaning to.

"Yes!" Louis whispered from the front seat, pressing play with a smug look on his face. Despite Jetta being my best friend, I burst out in laughter as I heard the intro music blasting through the speakers, oh my God, Louis... no you did not.

_"La la la lala lala la, la lala lala la la_ _Let me set it straight, I’ve done some shit,_ _And maybe I ain’t too proud of it_ _The monster in your bed_ _You were begging me “please don’t stop!_ _Said that I’m a douchebag, won’t call back_ _The worst hangover you ever had_ _Felt so good at first, you knew that it could never last_ _Wanna wash the dirt off my hands, wanna get this all off my chest_ _But I’m no good at saying sorry… woah oh!"_

Eleanor looked a little lost as she noticed we were all laughing about something, but it didn't seem to bother her. As Jetta stared at Louis, giving him an intense death glare, the rest of us were laughing or singing along. Okay, so I was the only one singing along but whatever. This is my JAM. Seriously, I did an acoustic cover of it.   
 _"I didn’t mean to fuck you over,_ _I just want to have some fun_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn’t have to be love_ _I didn’t want to hurt no body, I’ma throw my white flag up_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn’t have to be love_ _La la la la la, la la, la, la la, la la la la oh oh, oh, oh oh it doesn’t have to be love_  
 _Climbing out your window, gypsy fade, just another typical Saturday_ _Wrong name, my mistake, I didn't meant to break your heart_ _We were on a joy ride, Bonnie and Clyde, never ever been so satisfied_ _Heartbeats, blinding lights yeah you kept me up all night. Woah oh!_  
 _I didn’t mean to fuck you over, I just want to have some fun_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn’t have to be love_ _I didn’t want to hurt no body, I’ma throw my white flag up_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn’t have to be love_ _La la la la la, la la, la, la la, la la la la oh oh, oh, oh oh it doesn’t have to be love_ _La la la la la, la la, la, la la, la la la la oh oh, oh, oh oh it doesn’t have to be love"_

At this point everyone was singing along, Liam even had his phone out recording the chaos. I was playfully singing to Niall dramatically as he gave me a goofy grin. As my favorite part of the song came up, I grabbed the collar of his polo shirt, tugging him close to me as I playfully sang in his ear.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I was laughing like an idiot at the show Channing was putting on for me... and everyone else. Her raspy voice worked so well with this song, I couldn't do anything but keep my eyes trained on her, watching her pink lips as she belted out the lyrics. Although in our case, this song was the complete opposite of our relationship... it was still incredibly hot.

This playful side that she let out every once in a while was something I absolutely loved... when she just let go, not giving a shit what anyone thought. My breath hitched as she grabbed a hold of my shirt, roughly pulling me against her chest, singing in a hushed voice against my ear... and quite honestly making me feel like I needed to take a cold shower. The rasp in her seductive voice was making chills crawl painfully up my neck;

_"You may never wanna see me again,_ _go on and tell all your friends_ _That I’m no good, I’m no good_ _Don’t wanna put up a fight,_ _I’ve had the time of my life_ _And I’m no good at saying sorry… woah oh!_  
 _I didn’t mean to fuck you over,_ _I just want to have some fun_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn't have to be love_ _I didn’t want to hurt no body, I’ma throw my white flag up_ _We can rock the world tonight but know it doesn't have to be love_ _La la la la la, la la, la, la la, la la la la oh oh, oh, oh oh it doesn’t have to be love_ _La la la la la, la la, la, la la, la la la la oh oh, oh, oh oh it doesn’t have to be love_  
 _I didn’t mean to fuck you, I didn’t mean to fuck you over,_ _I didn’t mean to fuck you over (doesn't have to be love)_ _I didn’t mean to fuck you, I didn’t mean to fuck you over,_ _I didn’t mean to fuck you over (doesn’t have to be love)"_

As the song finished, Channing winked before kissing me roughly on the mouth; she released my shirt and pushed me back against the window. I felt my mouth gaping open slightly, and laughed after she placed her hand under my chin, closing it gently. She was breathing heavily, and glanced around to see everyone smirking at her. I smiled and pulled her toward me as her face began morphing to the shade of a tomato, apparently the fact that we were in the midst of company had slipped her mind.

"Oh my God... I'm sorry guys," she mumbled into my chest as I hugged her tightly. I chuckled at her unnecessary apology, based on everyone's amused facial expressions.

"Don't be sorry! That was hot!" Louis hollered from the drivers seat.

Channing turned to glare at him, "Eyes on the road," she said as she playfully narrowed her eyes at him. Her cheeks were still red, and the embarrassed flush made her grey eyes stand out even more, God she was beautiful.

"Yeah, Niall... I bet she'd give a good lap dance, mate!" Harry quipped with a very cheeky grin. I silently agreed with him, giving him a wink as Channing turned round to slap at his head. It's like I discovered a new side of Channing every day; not only was she beautiful and delicate... but she could let loose and be sexy and provocative.

As we continued driving, Jetta and Louis continued their lyrical battle, however now it felt more light-hearted... no where near as serious as before. They actually seemed to be back to acting like friends... truthfully I didn't know what to make of it.

 I encouraged Channing to rest her head in my lap, playing with her hair as she stared up at me. She stretched her legs across Zayn, and snuggled in closely, hugging my torso. I lay my head on the back of the seat, until I shot upright  when I felt an obviously intentional pressure on my crotch. I subtly peeked down to see her hand, resting somewhat innocently against me; at least I thought it was innocent until I felt her gently squeeze me through my jeans, causing a low hiss to escape between my teeth. Jesus Christ... this cheeky girl was going to be the death of me.


	23. I Punched That British Bitch Right in His Fucking Face

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Louis P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After we finally made it to the camp grounds, everyone was rather exhausted and just ready to get some space from being cooped up for so long. Eleanor was walking by my side as I looked ahead of us, watching Jetta and Harry joke around with one another. There was no point in lying about it... I was a little jealous.

"Harry! There's no way you can hold your breath longer than me... you are soooo on! I'm on the freakin swim team for Christ's sake!" I heard Jet say dramatically as she socked him in the arm.

Apparently we were going to go swimming in the lake. We made our way toward a small clearing where I spied Niall and Channing sitting together in the grass. Zayn was sitting on a fallen tree trunk while Liam was walking toward the dock that led to the lake.

"Is this someone's property or something?" I asked, directing my question to Jetta. This wasn't a typical camping site like I'd pictured... rather, it was just a heavily wooded area with a clearing in the middle and a long dock that led into the lake. Jet nodded her head before she pulled her tee shirt over her head, revealing her black bikini top and sculpted stomach. Thanks for the warning Jet...sheesh. Like I've said before, she's busty and it's rather hard not to stare.

"Yeah, a friend of mine owns this property... well his father does," she said as she looked at the ground. I detected a little distaste in her voice when she mentioned this "friend", but decided to just let it go. I looked around and noticed everyone was talking adamantly about getting in the water.

I plopped down next to Eleanor and she casually leaned her cheek against my shoulder. I'll admit, I really did enjoy having her here with me; for some reason though, I just felt like things were so strained and exhausted between the two of us. I turned so that I could look her in the eye, giving her a smile and a small kiss on the cheek.

Harry startled me when he quickly ran over to us, "You guys up for a swim?" he asked with a cheeky grin. El and I nodded our heads and I felt a frown grow on my face when I saw the wink Harry threw at Jetta, followed by the blush she sent back. Why can't I just be happy for them? Why do I still feel the constant need to stake my claim over her? As I continued watching I noticed when Jetta subtly looked my way, but she quickly diverted her gaze when her eyes met mine. And that right there is exactly why I can't let her go.

It was rather hot out already, even though it was barely 11 in the morning, so I definitely wouldn't mind cooling off in the water. I stood up, grabbing my trunks out of my bag; as I looked around though, I realized that everyone else had done the smart thing... in wearing their suits under their clothes. Well I didn't get that memo.

I looked over toward the sparkling water, watching awkwardly as Jetta and Harry played around on the dock. He picked her up over his shoulder and proceeded to throw her into the water, before quickly jumping in after her. Just a few days ago I was the one tossing Jetta into the pool... the unwanted memory made me scowl as Eleanor tapped me on the shoulder.

"Babe, you coming?" she asked with a smile as she started walking toward the dock. I couldn't help comparing her figure to Jetta's as she walked away. Sure, Eleanor was beautiful and fit. She was extremely thin though, and I couldn't stop myself from wishing she had a little extra meat on her bones... a little more muscle. El seemed so fragile and delicate, while Jet was strong and fierce.

I violently shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts; I saw Niall, Liam and Zayn racing toward the water as well, El started laughing as Zayn grabbed her hand, dragging her away.

"I'll be there in a bit!" I hollered to their retreating figures. I still had to change, so I was making my way back over toward the van since we had yet to assemble the tents. As I took a last look at my friends, I felt a massive amount of tension growing in my stomach as I saw Eleanor take a seat on the dock next to Jetta. They sat there together talking, with their feet in the water as Harry and the rest of the lads tried splashing them.

"Oh God..." I mumbled under my breath, draping my trunks over my shoulder, and rubbing my hands up and down my face.

I was startled when an unexpected voice sounded in my ear, "Don't worry Louis... Jetta won't say anything," she said from behind me, offering me a sad smile as I turned around to see her sitting on the fallen tree trunk. She was still wearing her Artist vs Poet tank top and her black leggings; I could see her bikini top underneath her shirt, but she was making no move to strip out of her clothes.

Turning around, I gave her an uneasy smile as I watched her put her head down, playing with her hands as they sat in her lap. I glanced at everyone else in the lake, meeting Niall's concerned gaze as his eyes darted to Channing as well, a frown clearly drawn on his face at her reluctance to get into the water.

Niall looked like he was about to get out of the water to come to Channing's side, but I motioned for him to wait as I went over, taking a seat on the trunk next to her. I was her friend too, after all.

"What's up, Louis?" she asked, in a somewhat deflated voice. She had yet to raise her eyes to meet mine, so I sat there in silence until she finally looked up at me.

"Aren't you getting in with us?" I asked softly. She smiled sadly and let out a nervous breath as she looked again down at her lap.

"You know why I can't, Louis..." she trailed off so quietly, I was straining my ears to hear her voice. I had a feeling I knew what she was referring to, but there was no way I was going to allow this beautiful girl to miss out on the fun because she felt self conscious about the marks on her body.

So I took the playful approach, trying to lighten her mood, "Why? Can't swim? No worries, I'm sure Zayn brought some extra floaties," I said with a thoughtful look at I tapped my finger to my chin.

She let out a little chuckle, shaking her head, "No, Louis I can swim," she mumbled as she rolled her eyes. She raised her arms, taking her long hair into her hands and tying it into a pony tail on the top of her head.

I sat there, acting like I was still thinking, "Hmm... Oh... Ohhh, is it that time of the month?" I asked, nudging her with my elbow.

Her face grew red as she laughed loudly, "NO! Omg, Louis shut up!" she replied in exasperation as she slapped my arm. "Ouch..." I whined meekly, causing her to laugh again.

I sat there for a moment, pretending to still be thinking, "Have you got Limnophobia, love? It's quite alright! We won't let anything happen to you!" I said dramatically as I clutched her hand in between both of mine. I glanced toward the lake once more to see Niall giving us a bewildered look, but he just shook his head and continued trying to dunk Zayn underwater.

She covered her mouth with her hand as she snorted lightly, "What the hell is Limnophobia?" she asked in amused confusion.

"It's the fear of lakes, but of course you knew that already, silly!" I insisted, pretending to sigh in exasperation.

She released a chorus of cute giggles as she took her hand out of mine, "No, Louis, you are so weird!" she replied, still laughing, "How do you even know what that's called anyway?" she asked as she wiped her brow. Like I said earlier, it was getting pretty hot, and I could feel sweat trickling down my back as well.

"You'd be amazed at the amount of knowledge this brain can hold," I said seriously as I pointed to my head, giving her a wink.

"You're really something else," she said softly, laughter no longer evident in her voice. She sighed again as she looked out at the water to watch our friends playing around and splashing one another. I followed her gaze as I whispered, "It won't be as much fun unless you're in there with us, Chan," she turned toward me, giving me a reluctant smile.

She looked back toward the water, "Louis, I can't. I'm too embarrassed," she said in a thick voice, "I'm fine with watching, go ahead!" she encouraged, trying to push me off the tree trunk.

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at her. She just shook her head at me, trying to hide her smile. As I sat back down, I wrapped my arm around her in a friendly gesture, "You know what? I don't think I'm going to get my trunks on. Swimming half naked is overrated. Wouldn't you say so?" I asked her seriously as I hugged her to me. She looked up at me shyly, quickly looking away again once my eyes met hers.

"You don't have to do that, Louis," she said hesitantly. I shook my head adamantly, "I haven't the slightest clue what you're going on about... but if you want to be cool like me, then don't bother getting into your suit. I say we just go fully clothed. We'll make a statement!" I said with excitement, as I looked at her expectantly.

She looked back at the water, Niall saw her watching him and waved wildly at her, hollering for her to join him. "Pwese?" I begged in a baby voice, "Do it for your snowflake!" I exclaimed as I waved back at Nialler as well.

She smiled as she looked away and then slightly nodded her head, "Ok, Lou," she laughed as she got to her feet, looking me intently in the eye, "Thank you," she said sincerely. She then surprised me by pulling me into a hug; I squeezed her back for a few seconds before releasing her, "Come on, let's go be rebels! They'll just be jealous of us," I said as I winked at her. I love throwing my own lyrics into casual everyday conversations. She rolled her eyes at my not so subtle lyric drop. I took her hand in mine, dragging her toward the water.

Her laughter rang out across the lake; I watched the happy smile cross her face when she jumped into the water, pretty much right onto Niall who was attempting to catch her, but he stumbled and they both went under. I knew sometimes it was hard for her to join into normal activities, but as I saw her completely let go and lose herself in the moment, I couldn't help but smile as I watched on. She felt like another of my little sisters... and I was incredibly proud of her.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I sat on the fallen tree trunk, in no hurry to get into the water. Niall had yet to notice that I stayed behind when he ran off with Zayn and Liam. Honestly, if he thinks I'm getting in my swimsuit in front of everyone, then he's crazy. In front of him I don't mind so much, but I'd rather not flaunt that my body looks like a botched science dissection in public.

I spied Louis as he stood in front of me, his shoulders seemed tense as he looked on to see Jetta and Eleanor talking on the dock.

"Oh God..." I heard him whisper to himself. As I watched him, he looked so nervous. I couldn't really relate to his current situation, but I had no doubt that he cared deeply for both of them, so I decided to offer him some reassurance.

"Don't worry Louis... Jetta won't say anything," I said, smiling as I saw him jump from my unexpected voice. He turned slowly giving me a nervous smile. I expected him to nod and then run off to change into his trunks, but he surprised me when he walked over and took a seat on the dead tree trunk. 

***

Louis wrapped his arm over my shoulder, "You know what? I don't think I'm going to get my trunks on. Swimming half naked is overrated. Wouldn't you say so?" he asked me seriously as he hugged me close. I looked up to meet his eyes for a moment before looking away shyly. I knew what he was doing... offering to leave his clothes on with me. He could tell I didn't want to be in my suit and I also didn't want to be the only freak in the water wearing clothes. I almost felt myself getting emotional over his sweet gesture.

After feeding me a few more lines about how he wanted us to be 'rebels who swam with their clothes on,' I finally gave in and let him pull me over to the water. Niall gave me a happy smile, and I of course felt a tug on my heart, happy to be next to him again, "Jump, I'll catch yeh," he promised as I slowly released Louis' hand.

I turned toward Lou, silently thanking him for his kindness. I hadn't really spent much time trying to get to know the other boys, mostly because Niall was pretty much hogging me, (not that I was complaining.) However, as I smiled at Louis, I felt a new connection to him. How could these boys even exist? They're just so sweet.

"Go on, love," Louis urged as he gave me a happy grin. I took his hand in mine once more, giving it a little squeeze. Once I released him I looked down at Niall as he waited patiently for me to jump; I took a few steps back, deciding to get a running start.

As I flew through the air, making my way down the small drop to the water, I felt the wind in my hair and the spray of water against my skin. Maybe Louis wasn't anywhere near as selfish as I thought... maybe I could try and help him with his dilemma.

My wandering thoughts were quickly scattered across my brain as I felt Niall's arms close around my waist, as well as the chilly touch of the lake as it swallowed us both into it's depths.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Channing's jump had caught me slightly off guard because I was distracted as I witnessed Louis and Chan having a moment together. I didn't feel any jealousy, rather I felt relief that my friend was willing to help me improve Channing's self esteem. The fact that he took it upon himself to convince her to swim made me feel incredibly thankful.

I noticed they were both clothed, but didn't make any mention of it; I knew that's how he got her in the lake. Knowing Louis, he probably made it seem like it was his idea to keep their clothes on. I was zapped back to reality as I felt Channing's hands grasping onto my shoulders, and while I quickly tried to grab her waist and steady us, being as I was in deeper water, I had nothing for my feet to stand on to keep us from going under. So inevitably, the momentum of her jump dragged us down to the bottom.

We began sinking and I could see that Channing was smiling as I opened my eyes under the water. Although it was somewhat murky underwater, the sun that was shining down made it easy for me to see her face. Still sinking, we spun around for few more feet and I watched in awe as her long hair spread out around us; I could tell there was something keeping it trapped, but I decided I wanted to see it completely untamed. As my feet touched the bottom, I felt her wrap her legs around my waist; smiling I brought my hand to the back of her head, gently pulling out the tie and freeing her dark locks.

She shook her head back and forth, giving me the full effect as I pushed off the bottom of the lake, speedily taking us back up the 10 or so feet to the top. As we broke the surface, her arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders, bringing her lips to mine. I smiled into the kiss as I awkwardly tried to tread water while holding both of us up. It was difficult to say the least. Channing started laughing too as she noticed my struggle and unwrapped her legs from my waist. She playfully placed her hands on top of my head and gave me an evil smirk as she dunked me under the water before quickly swimming away. Normally I'd put up more of a fight, but the deep water really seemed to be messing with my credibility, considering I just got owned by my girlfriend.

I quickly popped back up, coughing slightly as I heard a few people snickering and Channing laughing from the dock, where she was now climbing out to sit. I gave her a playful glare as I watched her climb the ladder and take a seat on the opposite side of Eleanor. I was relieved when no one else made mention of her choice to keep her clothes on, but my relief was quickly dunked out of me, quite literally as I felt another pair of stronger hands pushing me under once more. Once I was underwater I turned and noticed the culprit was wearing a white tee shirt and chinos... hmm... okay Lou. Two can play at this game.

I punched him in the gut before making my way back to the surface. I laughed for a moment as he groaned before noticing both Zayn and Harry quickly descending upon us. I left Louis to fend for himself as I sped away toward the dock. When I turned around to check out the damage, the three were playing around, dunking one another... showing no mercy. You know, the usual.

It wasn't as deep near the dock, so my feet clutched the sandy, debris ridden lake floor as I stood next to Liam; we laughed as we watched them wrestle and joke around. Liam and I usually tried to stay out of the fights... we were the calm ones. He causally slung his arm over my shoulder, "I saw that Chan manhandled you back there, mate," Liam teased as he decided to then give me a noogie. I pushed him away as I heard the girls laughing quietly at his comment, I turned and scowled at them, "Ya, well yeh caught meh off guard," I said defensively.

Chan giggled for a moment before motioning for me to come closer. She laid down on her stomach as she reached down to wrap her hands around my neck, "I'm sowwy," she said mockingly. I glared at her for a few more seconds before breaking out into a smile.

I tugged her off the dock so that she splashed into the water, back into my arms. She held a pretend pout to her face as we floated off to the side, away from the others. Her legs wrapped round my waist once more as her arms locked around my neck and her forehead came to rest against mine, "Will you ever forgive me?" she teased with that damn pout still on her face.

I just stood there, holding her close to me. The water was up to our shoulders, and I felt the trickle of water that dripped down my back as it left her fingertips. I placed my hands gently around her face as we drew closer; I stopped when our lips were barely touching, "Always," I whispered against her lips, before capturing them with my own.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o  **Jetta's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As the afternoon went on, I found myself getting along quite well with Eleanor. At first when I found out she was going to be coming with us on the trip, I wasn't exactly excited; however, as we kept talking and playing around with the boys, I realized that I was really starting to like her... which of course was making me feel guilty and awful, but I just tried to ignore those thoughts as we continued watching the boys play. We'd all been in the lake for hours now, so it was safe to say my fingers were so pruney I thought they were going to stay that way for the rest of my life.

"So how's it been living with these idiots the last couple of days?" Eleanor asked in her cute British accent. I looked away from my disturbingly wrinkly fingers to meet her curious brown eyes. Why does she have to be so cute? No wonder Louis doesn't want to break up with her.

"It's been a real headache, let me tell you," I whined in exasperation, "but in all honestly, they're really great to me and Channing. She really needs this, I'm thankful they've welcomed us into their 'inner circle'," I joked with finger quotes.

Eleanor laughed loudly, causing Louis to stop wrestling for a moment to look our way. He met my gaze, giving me a nervous stare. I subtly nodded my head at him, trying to tell him he needn't worry. I wasn't going to tell Eleanor. No, that was going to have to be his job. I find bliss in ignorance, and I was in no hurry to mess up the comfortable balance our little group had at the moment.

"Well, Louis speaks highly of you, says your funny and easy to get along with," she said with a smile. I felt myself blushing, so I coughed and turned my head, trying to distract myself from my own thoughts.

I turned back toward her after composing myself, "Yeah, he's great," I said softly, "You're really lucky," I laughed as she smiled bashfully.

"He's just a big kid, isn't he?" she voiced as she watched him playing with the others in the lake. I nodded my head as I asked a question that had been bugging me since the day I met Louis, "How do you two make this long distance thing work? Is it hard?" I asked, trying to go about the subject without sounding too nosy.

She cleared her throat slightly as she looked down and began nervously twisting her hair around her finger, "It's really hard sometimes. Things just get really strained when we go so long without seeing each other... I miss him and all, but this is how our relationship has ALWAYS been," she let out an exhausted sigh as she continued, "I feel bad because even though we've been together forever, I can't say that I miss him when he's gone. It's always been like this... sometimes I wonder if we would even be together if we had to be together for long periods of time," she wondered quietly to herself. I wasn't sure if she meant to say that out loud, so I just nodded my head once more.

A comfortable silence grew between us as we watched the boys trying to play a game of chicken with one another. I held my hand to my mouth as I watched Louis climb onto Harry's shoulders and Zayn climb onto Liam's.

I glanced to my left, noticing the couple who were lounging on the grass next to the water, about twenty feet away from us. Niall and Channing were lying on a blanket, drying in the sun. I smiled as I realized Chan had finally taken her clothing off, so that she was just in her swimming suit. It warmed my heart every time I saw how comfortable Niall seemed to make her feel with her own body. He was breaking down her walls at an alarming rate... I just prayed he would be careful with her.

Eleanor followed my gaze, releasing an "Awwe," when she spotted them together. We watched them creepily for a moment, laughing as I watched Channing turn red and she covered her face with her hands. Niall was laying on his side, smiling down at her as he kissed her lightly on the nose.

"They're really good together, aren't they?" Eleanor observed, turning back to meet my eyes, "I'm so happy he found her. Niall is so sweet, I always knew that when he found the right girl, he'd treat her like a Goddess," she mused as we turned back to watch the other boys, still playing chicken. I swear, they touch each other to a point of where their sexual orientation becomes questionable.

"Yeah they're good for each other," I agreed, somewhat distracted as I noticed Louis and Harry swimming toward us. Eleanor gave me an alarmed look as they came to the front of the dock, looking up at us expectantly.

"Can we help you boys?" Eleanor smirked as we stared down at them.

"Care for a game of chicken?" Louis asked us in a game show host voice. His eyes lingered on me a second too long as I dropped his gaze and looked over to meet Harry's.

"Come on! We'll crush em'!" Harry said with excitement as he turned and looked over his shoulder, enticing me to climb onto his shoulders. I laughed as I carefully wrapped my legs his neck, and blushed as his strong hands clutched onto my thighs, trying to steady me.

He walked a little ways away from the dock, but not too far so that he was still able to touch the bottom. As we turned around, we saw Louis and Eleanor making their way toward us. Hey I'm quite competitive, so even though I think I somewhat like Eleanor... bitch is going down!

Zayn and Liam swam close to us and named themselves as the 'referees.'

"1... 2... 3... GO!" Liam hollered out, causing Harry and Louis to step close to one another; I gave Eleanor a sheepish look as I grabbed a hold of her arms and began trying to push her off. The boys were cheering us on, but the fight was short-lived as I pushed her off, causing both her and Louis to go under in just a matter of seconds.

I was getting really into the game, and after I beat El for the third time, she gasped for breath as she pushed her hair out of her face. She looked up at me laughing, "Guys this has been fun, but I think Jetta is more suited to go up against one of you..." she trailed off as she continued to get her hair out of her face.

"Yesss! We are undefeated!" Harry yelled out in victory, as he took it upon himself to squeeze my ass. I gasped and smacked him on his curly head as the rest of the boys decided to rework their strategy. Eleanor swam over to the edge of the grass, where Niall and Channing were seated, watching the fight. Niall bent over, easily helping her out of the water and she proceeded to sit next to Channing; they looked up at the rest of us expectantly.

When I turned back to the other boys, I realized that Zayn was now on Louis' shoulders and they were giving me an evil smirk.

"Pfft... don't think you can distract me from crushing you fools by using my Zouis feels against me," I said, putting my hands on my hips. However, as I watched them look at one another and laugh, my inner fangirl went a little crazy.  She was screeching on the inside because... ZOUIS.

I made sure to keep my excitement off my face though as they slowly approached Harry and me. Harry squeezed my ass again as he offered me words of encouragement, "You got this Jet!" he cheered.

"Harold you better quit using this as an opportunity to grab my ass," I said in an accusing voice as I smacked him on the head again. I looked down to Louis' amused face, "Is this what he did to you too?" I asked him as he gave me a cheeky grin.

"Ehh... something like that..." he hinted, sending me a wink.

"Ew, Louis stop, you know I don't ship Larry!" I said in exasperation, throwing my hands into the air. As I was lost in my fangirl moment, I heard Louis yell out, "1,2,3 Flick!" and instantly felt Zayn's hands on me. One on my shoulder, and one on my waist. Those freakin cheaters think they can outsmart me? Hah, no.

As I felt Zayn pushing his weight against me, I struggled to push back. There was no doubt that he was stronger, but strength can also be a weakness if you don't know how to use it. As he leaned further trying to push me backwards, I was putting up a fight, but just as he thought he was going to win, I stopped resisting, releasing his hands and moving all the way over to the left, causing Harry to move as well to keep his balance. When I made this move out of Zayn's path, all of the weight he had been using against me suddenly had no where to go, so he immediately began falling forward.

I laughed loudly as Zayn fell forward, dragging Louis down with him, feeling a warm satisfaction spread throughout my body as their flailing bodies disappeared under the water.

After they reemerged, I crossed my arms over my chest, "Ouch, did that hurt?" I asked in an innocent voice as both boys looked up at me, shock apparent on their faces. I could feel my body shaking because Harry was still laughing and celebrating from our victory.

"Let me have a go!" Louis hollered as he climbed onto an unsuspecting Liam's back.

"Alright then, I reckon I'm playing this round then?" Liam asked, mostly to himself, since no one answered him. He walked over to Harry and I with Louis perched on his back. Louis was staring at me intently, trying to psych me out.

"Come at me bro!" I yelled at him as I smacked my hands against my chest like some sort of mocho man.

"I almost forgot how competitive you were, love," Louis mused, trying to distract me with sweet talk. He would have no such luck... I knew his plan. They approached slowly, no one even bothering to say "GO!" this time.

I raised my hands up to meet his as they came at me and we began straining against the weight of each other. My eyes locked on his as a smile played at his lips, "Don't get distracted by the size of my biceps, babe," Louis whispered as his face neared mine. I did allow my eyes the chance to glance down his arms for a split second, and I'll admit... I did enjoy the view. My enjoyment was short lived though as Louis chuckled because of my wandering eyes.

I refocused my eyes on his, smirking at him, "Do you not recall that every time we are in one of these situations... you are never the one to win?" I reminded him. I was of course referring to the skittle fight, as well as his attempt of throwing me in the pool.

He looked at me thoughtfully for a second, it looked like he was considering if he should say something or not. In the end, he seemed to decide to go ahead and risk it, "Well actually, I do recall I won the last time you stole my beanie," he whispered, winking at me before he continued and got closer to my face, "In fact... I think I got more than just my hat back..." he trailed off even more quietly, as his tone grew condescending.

I felt like someone had just punched me in the gut, this guy must have balls of fucking steel. How dare he throw that in my face? I felt my vision blurring as I tried desperately to keep myself composed. No one around us seemed to notice my distressed state. I saw Louis' eyes soften for a moment before they grew hard at the next set of words that left my mouth, "Fuck you!" I said through clenched teeth, a little more loudly.

Liam and Harry seemed to finally feel the tension and looked up at me with bewildered faces as I heard Louis' last attempt to break me, "Oh wait... I think you already did," he said slowly, with no emotion evident on his face.

My eyes grew wide and my breath came in harsh puffs as I felt my temper rising. Although he almost looked sad after his last statement, I was boiling inside, and I felt like I was going to erupt like a volcano. For some reason, my hands were still in his even though neither of us were putting up a fight. I needed him out of my face... I just needed him to get away from me.

He realized I was trying to hastily pull my arms from his grasp, "Jetta..." he said in a softer voice, as if he were going to retract his statement. Hah. Nice try. He was still refusing to let go of my arms as I began smacking at him. Liam and Harry were still watching us in confusion, and as my anger continued to rise and my temper flared, I did the only thing I could think of to get Louis away from me at that moment. I punched that little British bitch right in his fucking face. 

I pulled my fist back, hugging it against my chest as it began throbbing from the impact. I had an amazing sense of relief course through me as I watched Louis' fall back, smacking against the water. Hard.

"Shit!" Harry exclaimed as he watched Louis slowly reemerge from the lake, holding his face in his hands. Liam pulled his hands down to scope out the damage. Lou looked up for a moment, meeting my cold stare, and I almost smiled as I saw that his left eye was somewhat swollen and already turning a purplish red. The look on Louis' face was almost comical as he continued to clutch his eye and glare up at me.

As I was about to get off Harry's shoulders, I stopped and looked down at Louis, "I guess that means I win, you fucking dick!" I snarled at him before jumping off of Harry's shoulders and heading toward the dock. Luckily, Chan, Niall and Eleanor seemed to be over at the van at the time of my attack... so thank God for that. I was just going to leave Louis to do the explaining.

I swam away and climbed out of the water, leaving the three bewildered boys behind me. I just needed to get some air. Yes, I'm aware I was outside, but the air around the lake was suffocating me because it was tainted with Louis. I knew these woods like the back of my hand, so once I was on the dock, I took off in the direction of my favorite hiding place I used when I was a child. I didn't even bother looking back at the boys, not even when I heard Liam and Harry calling my name.

I was slightly surprised when I heard Louis calling after me as well, but if anything, as I heard his voice, it just caused me to run even faster.


	24. This Could Be a Forever Kinda Thing

Chapter 24: This Could Be A Forever Kinda Thing

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Eleanor's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After I was thrown off Louis' shoulders and felt my lungs filling up with water for the third time, I decided that I had had enough. After resurfacing and sputtering a few times to clear the fluid from my aching lungs, I politely excused myself from the game. Jetta was definitely competitive, and I just wasn't anywhere as athletic to keep up with her. I trudged through the chilly water to the edge of the grass where Niall and Channing were sitting together.

I offered Nialler a small smile as he reached his hand out and helped pull me out of the water. After I got settled on the blanket next to Channing, I watched Niall as he sat behind her, placing his legs on either side of her and tilting her body back so that she was leaning against him. I did notice the scars on Channing's thighs and felt sympathetic for whatever situation led her to that. Niall gently brushed his fingertips back and forth over the markings and I felt a smile tugging at my lips, he was just such a sweetheart. I could tell she was self conscious about the scars, but the fact that Niall was so accepting, really just showed his true colors.

I sat there subtly watching them interact, feeling a little knot in the pit of my stomach... God, sometimes I really missed that. That crazy in love kind of feeling; you can't get enough of each other and you prioritize your life around that person. Louis and I used to be that way... but for a while now, it seemed like our fire was burning out.

I turned back toward the water, watching and laughing as Jetta outsmarted Zayn, causing him to ungracefully fall head first into the murky water. I was pulled away from their game as I felt Niall tap me gently on the shoulder, "Hey El, do yeh want to help us try an' set up tha tents?" he asked as he helped Channing to her feet.

I nodded and hurried up the little hill behind them as we made our way toward the clearing. After a few more minutes, Zayn came following after us; Channing and I sat on some towels as we watched the boys work on the tents. We were really of no help, but I'm sure they didn't mind our company.

I was just letting my eyes wander, tuning in and out of the conversation as I absentmindedly peeked over my shoulder back toward the water. I saw Louis and Jetta now going head to head; I smiled because it looked as if Jetta was about to knock Louis off as well. After a few more seconds of watching, it seemed as if they were speaking, and they were no longer even trying to shove each other off.

I furrowed my brows in confusion as I slowly got to my feet, watching intently as I realized Jetta looked quite upset. What on earth was going on? My hands flew to my mouth, letting out a little startled squeal as I witnessed Jetta reel her fist back, slamming right into Louis' unsuspecting face. He immediately tumbled from Liam's shoulders and disappeared from view. By now, everyone else was standing behind or next to me, watching the confrontation that was happening in the water.

My hand was still covering my mouth as I watched Louis stand back up, holding his face in his hands. Liam and Harry shared matching expressions of shock and disbelief as I heard Jetta scream, "Oh... by the way, I win you fucking dick!" Jetta gave him a loathsome stare before she leapt from Harry's shoulders and hurried to the dock.

"Wha' did I miss?" Niall asked slowly, his eyes wide. Channing, Zayn, and Niall all looked to me for answers, I guess no one else saw Jetta's right hook.

I cleared my throat softly, "Um... Jetta just punched Louis in the face," I said slowly, my voice laced with confusion. Channing gave me an alarmed look as her eyes followed Jetta as she sprinted away from the water, away from the dock, away from all of us.

"Oh God, what did Louis do?" Channing asked out loud as she covered her face with her hands and shook her head.

"What do you mean?" I asked her curiously, my eyes still watching the boys in the water as they hurried toward the dock yelling after Jetta. Even Louis was screaming her name, trying to get her to stop. His eyes fell on me as he walked slowly up the hill; he froze, studying my reaction for a moment. I just offered him a bewildered look before he shook his head slightly at me, attempting to run in the direction that Jetta was headed.

Before he could take two steps, Harry grabbed his arm roughly, stopping him in his tracks, "Haven't you done enough?" he screamed in his face. My jaw dropped as I watched the way Harry spoke to him with disgust clear in his voice, "What the hell did you say to her?" he asked menacingly, getting up in Louis' face.

Louis stood his ground, pushing Harry away from him, "What's it to you?" he replied, with an equal amount of malice corrupting his words.

Liam quickly stepped in between them, placing a hand on each of their chests, pushing them apart and speaking calmly, "Boys... just take a step back, there's no need for that," he whispered in a strained voice.

By now, Niall and Zayn had also run down to get in between the battling best friends. I stayed planted in place, unable to move... unable to breath. I knew that look on Louis' face... I had a feeling I wasn't imagining things before. I could tell there was a little spark between Jetta and Lou, but I just tried to ignore it. As I felt Channing's hand close gently on my shoulder, I turned to meet her sympathetic eyes.

I was pulled away from Channing's stare as I heard Harry and Louis going at it once more, "What is your problem, Louis? What game are you playing at?" Harry taunted, as I noticed his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. When Harry was pissed, he was sure intimidating.

I turned around, seemingly unnoticed and quickly made my way toward the van... I could tell there was something going on between those two. I searched on my phone for the nearest cab company and made the call as I sat on the back of the van, waiting for Louis to come looking for me.

Maybe this was what was best for both of us; as I smiled down at the picture on my phone, I studied the boy who's arms were wrapped around me. He certainly wasn't Louis, but he was the chance at something new... a life not piled sky high with hate and threats. I'll always love Louis, but we had obviously been growing apart for a while... and I knew what I had to do. I knew that I had to let him go... and knowing he may not be as devastated as I thought he'd be, brought an enormous amount of relief to my conscience.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Harry's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I grabbed a hold of Louis arm before he could run off and make things even worse than they already were; I'm not even sure what the hell just happened, but I do know that Jetta was upset by something that he said to her.

"Haven't you done enough?" I yelled into his bruising face. A slight satisfaction came about from the damage Jetta caused to his face. That girl certainly packed a punch. Note to self... never piss Jetta off.

"What the hell did you say to her?" I asked loudly, feeling Liam's hand pressing against my chest to keep the two of us apart. I don't think I would have hit him... he was my best friend, but that didn't mean I wasn't getting sick of all of his bullshit!

Louis and I just continued to stand there, staring at one another. I honestly wanted to know what his deal with Jetta was. Were they friends, or were they more than that? I guess it wasn't really my business, but considering he had a girlfriend, I thought it'd only be fair if he'd back off.

It was hard to pull back my temper, I was trying so hard not to explode on him. Niall came to stand in front of me, he was facing me as he tried talking to me, a much needed distraction technique.

"Jus' calm down, mate... we all jus' need tah take a breath," Niall encouraged calmly. I rolled my eyes, but stepped back, spinning on my heal I turned quickly and started walking up toward the clearing where we were setting up camp, until I heard Louis call my name, "If you don't want me going after her, then you need to man up and do something about it," Louis said vehemently.

I quickly spun back around to meet his glare, quickly approaching him, "Maybe she needs a break from us, you ever think of that? Maybe she needs a break from all of these games you've been playing with her!" I yelled, Niall once again putting himself in front of me, trying to keep me from pummeling my best friend.

"Jus' relax, Chan an' I will go fin' her, yeah?" he asked as he looked behind me to where I assume Channing was standing.

"Actually, I know where she is," Channing said softly. Everyone quickly looked up to her; I noticed that Eleanor was no longer standing by her side when she started to approach us. Channing walked past both Niall and I as well as Zayn and Liam, she came to a stop in front of Louis. She took his hand, pulling him to the side and whispering into his ear.

**Channing's P.O.V (before Jetta's punched Lou in the face)**

I was lying on the beach towel next to Niall, he had his arm wrapped around me, pulling me against his side. I cuddled up against him, savoring his warm touch. The fact that my clothes were still on was making me feel especially cold since they were wet from the lake. I rest my chin on his stomach as I stared out into the water; I watched the other boys wrestling and also spotted Jetta and Eleanor sitting on the dock, laughing while dipping their toes in.

I slowly felt a sneaky set of fingers as they crept up my lower back, softly caressing my skin, "Babe?" I heard Niall ask, his voice sounding slightly rough from lack of use, considering we'd been relaxing in silence for almost an hour. What can I say? We're wild and crazy.

"Hmmm?" I asked, turning my face to look at him, now resting my cheek on his stomach. His cerulean eyes were shining in the sunlight as they stared into mine... they were so pretty I felt like I was to a point where I was almost drooling. Seriously, how does this boy even like me? He's so God damn beautiful.

"Can we take these off yet?" he asked sheepishly as he tugged on my wet shirt. I stiffened for a moment as I thought about his question, I dropped his gaze as I sat up for a second; I took off my tank top, revealing my colorful, striped bikini top. I didn't really have a reason to keep my shirt on, as much as I did my leggings.

I gave him a tight smile as he poked me in the belly button, "Happy now?" I asked him as I slapped his hand away from me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me over so that I was straddling him. I giggled as I looked around awkwardly, hoping no one was watching us. Niall seemed to have no problem whatsoever with PDA... but I always felt really awkward about it.

"No one is lookin'," he assured me in an amused voice. I felt his finger tips slip down my waist until they were resting lightly against my thighs. Way to be obvious, Niall. I knew what he wanted me to do, but I just didn't think I could do it.

I met his eyes as I quickly place my hands over his to stop him from caressing me, "I - I don't think can... we're in public. It's different when it's just me and you..." I trailed off at a loss for words as he gave me an understanding look.

"Can I tell ye somethin'?" he asked as he entwined our fingers, bringing my hand over to his mouth, kissing my knuckle as he gazed up at me, "Yeh know we're all yer friends, right? No one would ever say anythin'... Chan, you can trust them, they won't hurt yeh, jus' like I won't," he stated as his eyes bore into my own. I swear, was he like a sorcerer? How did he make me feel comfortable with doing things that I had absolutely refused to do for so long?

I didn't say anything as I dropped his gaze, staring down at our hands. I ran my fingers along the veins in his hands; I think I had a serious obsession... is it normal to get so turned on from fucking hand veins?

"Are these from playing the guitar?" I asked absentmindedly as I turned his hand over, inspecting his palm for a moment before losing interesting and going back to the veins.

He let out an amused chuckle, "I 'spose so," he quipped as he watched me play with his hands.

"Well why don't I have them?" I asked him, seriously afraid for a second that I was going to get hand veins. Sure, they were hot as hell on him, but I don't think they'd look very flattering on a woman.

He let out one of his signature laughs, bouncing me up in the air slightly since I was still sitting on his stomach, "I doubt it, love... I think it's got tah do with testosterone," he said with a wink as he trailed his fingers up, walking them past my belly button, stopping right under my bust line.

I shivered as he drew shapes against my stomach, smiling down at him, "But what if I end up getting them? Would you still love me?" I inquired, trying to hide my smile.

Niall rolled his eyes as he sat up so that we were sitting face to face, I was still on his lap, "We've been over this... Nothin' you could do or say could make me care about ye any less... " he trailed off before slowly pressing his lips against my own. This kiss was different than most of our other kisses, it wasn't desperate, or needy. It wasn't lustful or passionate... it was more like a promise, if that makes any sense? It was so slow and gentle, I could feel my heart literally growing larger by the second.

After pulling his lips away from mine, he slid his hands from my shoulders back up to cup me face, "This feels like it could be a ferever kinda thing," he said as he leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.

I closed mine as well as I wrapped my arms tightly around him. What the hell was happening? How did he sneak his way into my life so easily... so quickly? Of course, I've always loved Niall Horan from One Direction... but, I can honestly say that until a week ago when I finally met him, I didn't even know what love was. I never knew what this felt like. I never knew I could feel so happy... and it was all because of him.

*** o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** _[back to right before Jet punches Louis]_ o-o-o-o-o-o-o  After I watched Chan hug Louis before jogging back over to where I was standing, I took her hand in mine and we hurried away in the direction Jetta had fled. I grabbed my shirt that I'd left laying on our towel so that she could cover up, the sun was beginning to set and I knew it was going to start cooling down. She flashed me a smile as she slid it over her head and we continued on into the dense trees that surrounded the lake.

"So where you reckon she ran off tah?" I asked curiously as I helped her climb over fallen tree trunks and avoid the rocks and sticks that littered the ground.

"This property actually belongs to Blake's dad," she answered, as if I should know who Blake was. I gave her a bewildered expression as she smiled and continued on with her explanation, "Blake is sort of Jetta's on again off again boyfriend... they grew up together... used to be next door neighbors out here," Channing said as she looked up at the trees as if she were trying to figure out where she was. She seemed to spot a land mark she'd been looking for as she grabbed my arm, dragging me toward what looked to be a trail that began next to an enormous oak tree.

"Blake and Jetta used to have a tree house out in these woods... they were always playing in it. Jetta showed it to my last year when we came camping with Blake's family," she said, slightly out of breath as we came to stop in front of a huge, thick tree trunk that had wooden boards nailed to it, which I suppose people used as steps to climb to the top.

"Oh geeze," I mumbled as I looked up to the top to see and old tree house, nestled up in a thick bunch of branches.

Channing reached for the first wooden plank, beginning to climb effortlessly toward the top, "Are we goin' up there?" I asked, even though it was apparent that is what she intended.

She rolled her eyes at my obvious hesitation as I watched her scale the tree trunk, "Oh c'mon, Nilla! It's not that high," she said with a laugh as reached for the door, shoving it open while I just stared up at her from the bottom.

Reluctantly, I went ahead and placed my weight on the first two "steps" testing their resistance, making sure they wood indeed hold me; after standing still for a second and feeling satisfied of their sturdiness, I followed in Channing's foot steps, making my way to the top and hurriedly climbing through the opening of the tree house.

As I pulled myself up, I released a breath I was unaware I was holding as I spied Channing sitting over in the corner. She was looking sympathetically at Jetta, and as my eyes wandered farther to the right, that's where I noticed another presence in the tree house. I was a bit startled for a moment but as the boy looked up at me, he offered a friendly smile, quickly freeing my mind of any reservations.

"Ni, this is Blake," Jet said with a smile as she pointed to the stranger, whom I now knew to be Blake. He offered me his hand and I shook it quickly before sitting back down and taking a moment to scope out the inside of the tree house. There were a few boards missing from the floor and on the walls here and there, again adding slightly to my anxiety level, but I just tried to push my worry aside.

"This is pretty wicked," I voiced when no one else was saying anything. I wandered toward a built in bookshelf that seemed to be full of children's books as well as art supplies and other drawings that were also made by children. From the looks of it, these were probably made by Jetta and Blake themselves.

"So there's yet another person who now knows of our secret clubhouse," Blake joked with a disapproving tone. Jetta shrugged her shoulders sheepishly, "Hey blame Channing, she's the one who brought Nialler," she said in amusement.

I turned back toward them to see that Channing was now sitting next to Jet, hugging her tightly as she whispered something in her ear.

"I won' tell a soul," I promised as I saluted the tree of them. I went back to checking out the rest of the tree house, smiling at the random trinkets and momentos I spotted lying around that had probably been here for a decade or more.

"Blake, I didn't know you were going to be here...?" Channing mentioned kindly as I saw her brow furrow slightly, "Yeah well when Jet asked if she could use the lake I decided to bring out my own gang. May as well get good use of it before summer's over ya know?" he said as he typed on his phone.

"Well we're goin' tah have a bonfire, do yeh want tah come?" I asked, trying to be polite since the situation kept feeling awkward.

I was met with silence as Jetta smiled nodding her head and Blake grunted in agreement, "Sure, I'll just text the other guys, you don't mind do you?" He asked first looking at me then Jetta. I shrugged my shoulders as my eyes finally landed on Channing. She was staring at me with wide eyes, and her skin looked noticeably paler than it did a moment ago.

"Chan, ye alright? What's wrong?" I asked with concern as I scooted toward her, but she quickly waved her hand at me, shooing me away, "Ohh... er... nothing. I just thought I saw a spider... yeah... a spider," she trailed off randomly as she looked down at her hands.

I looked up at Jetta to see a perplexed expression clouding her face, Jet looked up meeting my eyes before she shrugged her shoulders. She turned back toward Blake as she cleared her throat, "So who's all here with you?" she asked, sounding excited to spend some time with her friends.

Blake still didn't look away from his phone as he began mumbling names, "Uhh... let's see... Joey, Levi, Tiff, Marc..." he trailed off as he looked up to think for a second, "Oh... and Kora, Natalie, Brett, Lynsi, Tyler and Tate..." Blake continued rambling off names, but I tuned him out and my eyes flew to Channing as hers grew wide meeting mine. I felt my fist clenching as I thought back to the letters that told me of the times Tate had tried coming on to her. She didn't freak out because she saw a spider... rather, she knew that Tate was probably here with him.

"What? Tate!?" I exclaimed, getting up on my knees; I glanced to Channing and she was giving me a pleading look, shaking her head subtly. Did they not know what that piece of shit did to her?

"Uh... yeah?" Blake said as more of a question, giving me an odd look before turning back to Jetta. I took a deep breath as I held my tongue back from decorating the air with some colorful language. I stared intensely at Channing before she had the nerve to look up and meet my eyes, I motioned toward the tree house door, "Err.. alright, well we're going to head back to camp... Jetta are you alright with walking back with Blake and everyone?" Channing asked softly, probably hoping she would say 'no' so she wouldn't have to walk back with me. Of course I was upset, how could she not tell her friends what that asshole did?

The air was tense so I went ahead and said my goodbyes quickly before practically jumping out of the tree house, quickly scaling the rigged wooden steps as I hurried to get to the bottom. I looked up to see Jetta slowly making her way back down to the bottom. Once her feet touched the ground, I quickly spun her around, "You never told them?" I asked her harshly. I took a second, closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose trying to calm myself down. I couldn't blame her for this.

She awkwardly shook her head as her eyes grew shiny, "N-No... he threatened me... said no one would believe my word over his," she said in a thick voice, trying not to let her emotions get the best of her.

"Channing, you should have told them... it's not fair that you still have to constantly be around him," I said as I pulled her into a tight hug, pushing her bangs out of her eyes to look at her.

"Please don't say anything? Please Niall? Just forget about him, I won't leave your side... I just don't want anymore drama going down today," she said softly as her eyes searched mine.

I shook my head as I let out an exasperated sigh, "If he comes near yeh, hell, if he even talks tah you, I'm goin' to kick his ass," I stated simply. I may not be much of a fighter, but that doesn't mean I can't sneak in a good sucker punch. Channing closed her eyes and smiled at my statement, before responding, "By the way, Tiff and Lynsi are total sluts... they are going to try to get all over you..." she warned with a nervous look on her face.

I laughed lightly, the tension broken as we slowly walked back the way we came, "Oh good... I jus' love me some sluts," I joked, rolling my eyes as she gave me a worried look. I nudged her chin with my fist, "Chan, I'm kidding. I'm not interested... don' worry about it, ok? I know how tah ignore unwanted attention, in fact I'm a pro," I said with a wink as I pulled her close and tickled her sides.

About half way back to the camp ground, I could tell she was growing tired, so I offered her a ride on my back and we continued back toward the clearing. I smiled as I saw the glowing embers of the fire reflecting off of the shimmering water, it was a beautiful sight. Her arms were wrapped snuggly around my neck and we stood there, admiring the view together for a few moments.

I gently released Channing to the ground as we got closer, smiling as she hurried over to Zayn who had a bag of marshmallows, offering to help him make smores. I still felt tense about the company we were soon to be in the midst of, but I pushed it to the back of my mind as I sat down on the log next to her, grinning at her as she offered me a bite of her burnt marshmallow.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Jetta's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I made my way to the tree house, rushing through the gnarling trees and hearing the twigs breaking under my feet. I should have grabbed my shoes before running off into the fucking woods. As I came to the ancient house, filled with my childhood memories, I grabbed my phone and sent a text to someone I hadn't spoken to aside form a text here and there for a while. We grew up together and used to be best friends... but after our relationship grew physical, things just got really awkward and weird between us. He wanted more... and I just didn't.

_Jetta: Hey loser. I'm about to check on our secret place. When's the last time you were here?_

I sent the text quickly before shoving my phone into my bra and climbing up the rough tree trunk. Once I got toward the top, I winced as I slid my hand over a particularly rough piece of wood, pulling it back to see the huge splinter that was now digging into the middle of my palm, "Well, shit," I mumbled to myself as I held my hand in front of my face, inspecting the damage.

I was startled as I heard some chuckling coming from the opposite side of the tree house. I about toppled back out of the open door as I noticed the figure lurking toward the back, hidden in the shadows. I was about to start screaming before they crawled forward and I immediately saw a familiar eyebrow ring and dark, coiffed hair.

"Oh my God, Blake... you scared the shit out of me!" I whisper-yelled across the small distance between us. I still had my hand clutched against my chest and I felt the excessive pounding of my heart which had been brought on by fright, "the hell are you doing up here?" I demanded after I took a moment to compose myself.

He laughed again softly, "Well after you asked to use the property, I got some friends together too. I figured I may as well use it while the weather's still nice," he reasoned as he winked at me. I smiled at him, looking down toward the ground.

Although just moments ago, I'd felt like crying because of Louis, I now felt like laughing because... Blake just always did that to me. I knew I didn't love him like that... I knew we would never reach that level of intimacy... but I still did love him as a friend. He shot me a crooked grin as his eyes appraised the wall next to the bookshelf that held a lot of our old drawings we did as children.

"When's the last time you were here?" I asked, scooting closer to him.

"It's been a few years," he responded lightly as he picked up a particularly terrible drawing I'd made of the two of us in the third grade. I rolled my eyes as he began laughing at my expense, "Shut up!" I whined, punching his arm lightly, wincing again though as my knuckles felt sore from Louis' hard, stupid face.

"Aren't you supposed to be hanging out with that boy band?" he teased as he poked me in the ribs. I turned to him with a confused look, "How do you know about that?" I asked, confused as to how he knew what was happening in my life. I didn't exactly share it with anyone.

"You've been on gossip sites... in photos with them and stuff," he reasoned as he shrugged his shoulders. His light blue eyes, which seriously about matched mine studied mine. When we were younger, people often thought us siblings because of our rare, matching eye color.

"Oh..." was all I said simply, "yeah... well one of them was being a dickhead, so I bailed," I finished my sentence with a bitter taste in my mouth.

"Welp, guess you haven't changed much..." he hinted, causing me to punch him again in the shoulder, a little harder this time.

He laughed at my actions, "Nope exactly the same... still violent, and always running from your problems," he said seriously, no longer showing amusement in regard to our conversation. I dropped my gaze, looking down at my hands, "Blake... don't... don't start with that again," I begged him as I watched his jaw clench.

A small smile wriggled onto his lips as he spoke, "I won't Jet... but you have a real problem with commitment. Hopefully, you'll find someone who you won't want to run from," he mumbled, not meeting my eyes.

"Blake... I'm sorry. Ok? You can find better than me. I'm not good for you... I'm not good for anyone," I said softly, still staring down at my hands. He gave me a sympathetic look and was about to say something, however, we were interrupted as I heard soft laughter from down below. I gave Blake an apologetic look as I saw Channing emerge from the door.

***

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Harry's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Once Jetta got back to camp, with her "new friends," she didn't seem upset any longer. I wanted to talk to her about it, but I figured that could wait for another time. It didn't seem to be bothering her any longer, and I didn't want to drag her back down.

I still hadn't spoken with Louis, but I did smile to myself when I saw him approach Jet numerous times, and each time she ignored him.

Upon introductions, we were introduced to five new girls and six guys. For the most part, they all seemed pretty friendly, all except one guy who I got a bad vibe from, Tate. Something about him made me feel on edge, and I just had something nagging me in the back of my mind... why did he seem so familiar? All I knew is that Niall hadn't left Channing's side the entire night. Every move she made, he was like a damn shadow. I mean, I know they're usually joined at the hip anyways... but tonight, they seemed to take it to a whole new level.

Liam took a seat next to me by the fire, and I noticed him glance in the direction I was looking, "What's up with Ni and Chan?" I asked him as I watched her laughing as she sat on his lap.

"You don't know?" He asked me confusion written across his face.

"Uh... no. That's why I asked..." I said with a laugh.

Liam shook his head, not finding much humor in the situation, "That Tate fellow..." he said as he subtly motioned to the right of me.

"Yeah..." I persisted, "What about him?" I asked. I noticed that he was sitting in a lawn chair staring in the direction of Niall and Chan. Niall had an annoyed look on his face, but he had Channing turned around in the chair, straddling him so that she couldn't see behind her. The creepy smile on Tate's face was really weird, and after I saw him send a wink to Niall, I felt like a light bulb went off in my brain, "Oi, is that the twat from Channing's band? The one that kept harassing her?" I asked incredulously, quickly getting to my feet. A few people turned to look at me because of my outburst, but no one seemed to hear what I'd said.

Liam wrapped his arm over my shoulder, "Shh... easy, mate. Niall sent me a text... he doesn't want us to confront him--," I rudely cut him off mid sentence, "Why the fuck not?" I whispered harshly as we turned away from the fire.

"Channing doesn't want any trouble. She never mentioned it to Jetta... no one else knows what he did besides us," he whispered as he patted my shoulder, attempting to calm me down.

I rolled my eyes as I peeked over my shoulder, giving him a once over. He looked like a total douche.

"Just relax, Niall has it under control," Liam continued, softly.

I nodded my head, "Fine, but if he does anything or says anything to Chan OR Jetta, I can't promise I won't take things into my own hands," I mumbled back, turning around to take a seat on the log once more. This was fucking ridiculous.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Although I was sitting on Niall's lap, turned away from Tate. I could feel his beady eyes crawling all over my body. I also knew he was watching us because Niall seemed to keep clenching and unclenching his jaw.

I was distracted from my thoughts when I heard Tiffany's annoying voice over my shoulder, "Niall, can I please get a picture?! I love your music so much," she blabbered on. I could smell the alcohol on her breath and cringed as she leaned in closer toward Niall, "Please?" she begged in her annoyingly high voice.

I nodded my head, slipping off his lap so that he could get up to take a picture with her. She held up her phone, outstretching her arms so she could be sure to get them both in the frame. Niall was about to return over to me, but Tiffany pulled on his arm because Lynsi had also spotted him, and she begged for a picture as well. I was sitting peacefully, just staring into the fire, when all of a sudden, I felt chills crawling up my spine. Someone was gripping my shoulder tightly and when I looked up I saw the face of someone I could go the rest of my life without seeing again.

He gave me a cruel smirk as he trailed his fingers across my collar bones; I glanced to where Niall was, but he was still being distracted by the sluts, "Your little boyfriend won't always be here, you know... he can't stay here to protect you forever... must be hard dating a pop star," Tate taunted cryptically as he moved my hair so that it was behind my shoulder, giving him access to my right ear, "Just let me know when he's gone in a few days and we'll pick up where we left off," he whispered harshly, his disgusting breath, finally waking me up, encouraging me to pull away from him.

"You need to step the fuck back. They know what you've done... all of them. Sure you're strong Tate, but can you win in a fight where it's five against one?" I asked him seriously, quirking my eyebrow.

After he didn't answer for a few seconds, I continued on, "Didn't think so," I said harshly, finality ringing in my voice. Although I was trying to keep a brave face, I was shaking like a leaf on the inside. This guy seriously scared the shit out of me... but I was done letting him walk all over me.

He scoffed at my warning, trailing his fingers down my shoulder one last time, "You won't be so brave when they're not here to back you up... see you around, Channy," he said, my nickname dripping from his lips like poison. Although I felt another shiver rack my body, I left my face expressionless, pretending his threats didn't phase me. After a few moments I sighed in relief when I realized Niall was walking back over to where I was sitting; my smile grew even larger as I heard the crunching of leaves and snapping of twigs under Tate's feet as he stomped away.

Although I was happy that Niall was back within arms length, a sense of dread flooded my mind. What would happen when Niall had to leave? Where would I go?

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After taking a picture with the bleach blonde girl, I tried escaping back over to Channing, only to feel her pulling my arm, trying to get my attention. I turned, coming face to face to a dark haired girl with green eyes and almost disturbingly tanned skin. It almost reminded me of leather. I kept control of my facial expressions so as not to show my disgust as I leaned in to take a picture with the girl. The things I do for my fans... Jesus Christ.

They both then stood there, trying to chat me up: asking me about tour, asking for an autograph, commenting on how much they loved our album. I tried to just grin and bare it, but after a few minutes of torture, they finally said something that caught my interest.

"You're not really dating her, right?" the one I learned was called Tiff asked, amusement clear in her voice.

"Um.. yeah, actually I am. She's great," I replied, sticking up for Channing. These girls didn't know her, I wouldn't let them belittle her.

The brunette, Lynsi, scoffed at my answer as she rolled her eyes, "Why are you with that charity case? She's cut up like fucking Frankenstein," she said, laughing loudly at her lame attempt at insulting Channing.

"Excuse me?" I asked with clear edginess in my voice. Don't even tell me these girls were going to stand here, spouting off their opinions of Channing right to my face, because if so... then this isn't going to end well.

Tiff spoke up, "It's just... you're Niall Horan, singer of One Direction," she said dramatically, pushing her hair behind her ear before continuing, "... and she's Channing Darly; freaky, suicidal, cutter with daddy issues," she quipped, shrugging her shoulders and laughing as if it were okay to say that about somebody. What the fuck is wrong with people? Why in the hell do they think they have any right to tell me who I can and can't love?

I clenched my fists to my sides, trying to reign in my temper as it desperately tried to lash out at these trailer trash barbies, "Actually, she's quite amazin'," I said trying to be polite and turn away from them, but again, my arm was grabbed, "Oh please... you'll forget about her by the time you get to the next city," Tiff reasoned, offering me a wink. Lynsi giggled at her remark, nodding her head in agreement.

I ripped my arm out of her grip harshly, glaring at her excessive amounts of eye shadow and fake, spideresqe eye lashes. With my teeth clenched, I stepped closely to them so that I was in their faces, "You have no right tah say anythin' about my life. She's the strongest person I've ever met, and who are you? What have you done with yer lives that has ever helped another human being? The next time yeh feel like sittin' in front of the mirror, colorin' yer faces with all  that gaudy shit, jus' stop wastin' yer time. No matter how much yeh try, you'll never be as beautiful as that girl over there," I said pointing over my shoulder, "and ye know it,"  I whispered harshly. Their mouths were gaping wide open, and I tried to hold in my laugh as I headed back to Channing.

I wasn't going to take bullshit like that, maybe Liam and Louis may have... but that's probably why their relationships failed. Sure, I love my fans, but NOT the fans who act like that. I don't care if they come to every concert, or buy every damn poster, shirt, and album; if they can't respect me or the people I love... then the hell with 'em. I've waited all my life for a chance like this, and I wasn't about to give it up just so "fans" would continue to buy our music. Fuck it. I'm grateful for all that we've accomplished, but there comes a point in life when you have to decide what's  more important: friends and family or fame and money? Isn't the answer obvious?

I walked toward Channing, realizing she had sort of a worried look on her face; it quickly faded to relief as she noticed me approaching.

"Hey, you," she smiled as I picked her up from the chair, repositioning her so that she was sitting comfortably on my lap once more. I pressed a kiss to her cheek as I relaxed against the wobbly chair. My days here with her were beginning to dwindle down at an alarming rate... I had three days left before we had to leave.

What would happen to Channing when I left? She'd been staying at the hotel with us... but she wouldn't go back to her step father's would she? I wasn't even sure if it was safe for her to return to Jetta's house, especially if Jeff knew where she lived. A new tension was growing in my stomach as I worried about all of the possibilities.

After sitting in silence for a little longer, I noticed the lads sitting together near the fire; Liam was waving at me, holding out my guitar, "What's goin' on?" I called out to them, gaining the attention of most of the other people sitting around the fire.

Harry smiled, "Kora asked if we'd sing something," he smirked as he pointed toward a girl I had yet to actually meet. She had light blonde hair, and was rather tall... probably taller than me. She smiled shyly at me as I waved. Channing hopped up, apparently anxious to hear us play. I laughed silently as she huddled next to Jetta and another girl who's name I didn't know on the ground... gotta love my directioner girlfriend. I noticed Tiff and Lynsi were sitting in chairs off to the side of the fire, glaring at me, shrugging my shoulders, I took a seat on the log next to Harry.

"Any r'quests?" I asked as the chattering began to die down and more people noticed we were about to sing for them. Most of the guys looked like they could care less, but the girls looked as if they were bursting with excitement, even the pissed off trolls whom I was trying to avoid eye contact with.

"Truly, Madly, Deeply?" Kora asked timidly, "it's my favorite," she said with a big smile. I nodded my head at her and began gently strumming the guitar frets, carefully focusing on my finger placement as I listened to Liam begin the song.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Jetta's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 I smiled up at the boys as they sat in a line in front of the fire, my ears perked up as I heard the gentle strumming of Niall's guitar. The beautiful melody trickled out into the smoky night air, hushing the soft murmur of crickets playing their own music in the woods. My eyes were drawn to Liam as his strong voice demanded my attention;

_"Am I asleep, am I awake, or somewhere in between?_ _I can’t believe that you are here and lying next to me_ _Or did I dream that we were perfectly entwined?_ _Like branches on a tree, or twigs caught on a vine?"_

I noticed he specifically made eye contact with each of the girls as he sang, Liam was always so good at connecting with his audience, he really did love every single one of his fans. I noticed Channing fiddling with her hands in her lap as Niall's little solo approached, and I looked up to see what I had already expected. Niall, was looking right at her as his voice radiated out, drowning out the sound of his own guitar. I loved it when Niall would play guitar as well as sing... it was just incredibly hot... shhh... don't tell Chan I said that;

_"Like all those days and weeks and months I tried to steal a kiss_ _And all those sleepless nights and daydreams where I pictured this,_ _I’m just the underdog who finally got the girl_ _And I am not ashamed to tell it to the world"_

My ears were in heaven as they all joined in to sing the chorus, harmonizing perfectly,

_"Truly, madly, deeply, I am_ _Foolishly, completely falling_ _And somehow you kicked all my walls in_ _So baby, say you’ll always keep me_ _Truly, madly, crazy, deeply in love with you_ _In love with you"_

No matter how much I tried to not look at him, my eyes kept wandering over to Louis; anytime he would catch me looking at him, I'd immediately divert my gaze. Luckily, Liam's voice was able to distract me once more as I noticed him smiling, specifically at Natalie. I realized he'd kept looking at her even when they were all singing the chorus together as well. I tried to hide my grin, obviously Liam was digging Nat a little... maybe I should work on playing Miss Matchmaker... Hmmm. I was so focused on trying to find out a way to get them together that I totally missed Zayn's solo. 

I was immediately pulled from my jumbled thoughts as I heard a beautifully raw voice start his own solo. This solo of his always gave me chills... ugh, Louis, can you not? Of course I couldn't keep my eyes from drifting toward him, and as soon as my eyes met his, it was as if I couldn't look away;

_"I hope I’m not a casualty,_ _I hope you won’t get up and leave_ _May not mean that much to you_ _But to me it’s everything... everything"_

As they all joined together to sing the chorus one last time, I felt obligated to keep my eyes locked on Louis'. As he turned his head slightly, the light from the fire illuminated the dark bruises around his eye, planting a seed of guilt in my mind. Maybe I shouldn't have hit him... what's wrong with me? This is Louis effing Tomlinson... and I punched him in the fucking face? The more I thought about it... the faster that little seed of guilt blossomed into a full grown tree. I shook my head a little as the song ended, finally breaking me out of my trance.

After a few moments, I looked up to notice that Louis was still staring intently at me, and in that moment I realized something... or someone was missing; where the hell was Eleanor?


	25. This Isn't Twilight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _In the exchange, I had noticed Channing had a few trails of wetness down her cheeks as she watched on. Her eyes grew wide and horrified as she looked over my shoulder, and as I quickly turned around to see what had gotten her so worked up, I was met with fist as it connected with my mouth, instantly sending me to the ground. Loud screams broke out as I quickly tried to roll over and cover my face and head. So that's how he likes to play... giving out cheap shots. Should have figured that._

Chapter 25: This Isn't Twilight

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Louis' P.O.V** _[right after the punch]_ o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I noticed Channing was quickly approaching me as she declared she knew where Jetta would have gone. A wave of relief washed over me, even though there was seriously a strain on our... relationship at the moment, I didn't want anything to happen to her.

As Channing took my hand, she pulled me out of the squabble between me and Harry; I gave her a curious look as we continued walking up the hill, she dragged me along like a five year old. Once we were out of ear shot of the others, Channing began speaking in a hushed tone, "Louis, I don't know what is going on in your head, but you need to figure out what you want. Eleanor is back at the van and you need to talk to her... get on the same page. Don't string both of those girls along... you have to make a decision and stick with it," she said adamantly.

I nodded my head solemnly and I continued walking toward the van as she stopped to go back down the hill, I turned quickly though, calling her name, "Chan?" I asked softly.

She turned around quickly, offering me a polite smile, "Yeah, Lou?" Her hair was still damp and fell down her back and shoulders in pretty waves. Her skin looked slightly sun kissed, and for the first time I realized that she was no longer wearing her clothes, but just her bathing suit. Although her scars were definitely noticeable, it was nothing that made her look hideous or strange.

"You look lovely," I said sincerely, motioning to her suit, "Love the strips," I smiled as her cheeks grew hot and she looked down at the ground. After a second she looked up and held my gaze, she hurried over toward me once more, throwing her arms around me, "Thanks, Lou," she whispered, "Make the right decision for YOU," she insisted before releasing me and walking back down the hill to stand next to Niall. She sent me one last wave before taking Niall's hand and leading him away toward the woods, in which Jetta had disappeared into.

With a lump in my throat, I continued up the hill, searching for Eleanor. After a moment, I noticed that the back door to the van was open, nervously I walked over, taking a seat next to her. We sat in silence for a few moments, nothing could be heard besides my obnoxiously loud heartbeat. After what felt like an eternity, she finally spoke up, drawing my attention away from my yellow swim trunks, which I had been staring at for the last five minutes.

"You like her," she said, phrasing it more as a fact rather than a question. My shoulders grew tense as I tried to figure out the best way to answer her question; after a few more seconds of my silence, I felt her warm hand close around mine, I looked down at our hands curiously before looking up to meet her gaze.

"But I love you..." I stated, without a doubt in my mind. It was true, I did love her... she had been there for me through everything. I searched her eyes, trying to figure out where this was going. Shouldn't she be yelling at me? Crying? Threatening my life? Kicking me in the balls? All of these thoughts were racing through my mind, but she did something that I wasn't expecting. She pulled me into a hug, laughing softly.

After embracing her for a few seconds, I pulled back, giving her a confused look, "What's funny?" I asked, noticing she had yet to let go of my hand.

"Louis, what are we doing? We both know that something has changed in our relationship, we both can feel it. Maybe it would be best if we just went our separate ways for a while... gave each other some space... and some freedom," she added on softly as her eyes left mine and focused on her lap.

After a moment of staring at her, she kept refusing to meet my eyes, "Have you met someone, El?" I asked her slowly, finally putting two and two together. Her cheeks grew slightly rosy, and a little smile slipped onto her face as she nodded sheepishly. She became a little nervous as she met my eyes once more, "I'm so sorry... I don't know what happened... but, yeah... I think I have," she voiced softly, "But I couldn't just leave you like that... without knowing you'd be okay," she whispered as she shrugged her shoulders.

Although I did feel a little sting in my gut from the fact that she had been seeing someone else, I mostly felt like a burden had been lifted from my shoulders. Not that El was a burden... but I just mean I felt less guilty over the feelings I was possessing toward Jetta.

"How long?" I asked curiously, as she turned around pulling her legs up to her chest, and wrapping her arms around them as she looked at me, "About two months," she replied with a silly smile across her face.

"Name? Age? Profession? Criminal history?" I began rambling off a list of questions, causing Eleanor to giggle and roll her eyes. "Shut up, Louis... I'm still trying to get to know him myself. I've kept him at arms length because I couldn't just abandon you," she whispered, her eyes holding on to mine, filling with a spark I hadn't seen in such a long time.

"Love, don't worry about me. It's not your job to make sure I'm happy... you need to do what makes you happy," I assured her, scooting over slightly so that I could wrap my arm around her shoulder.

"I still love you, Louis... I think I always will," she whispered as she leaned her cheek against my shoulder. I nodded my head, understanding exactly how she felt. As cliché as it seemed, we loved each other, we just weren't in love any longer. Growing up, I always thought that was a massive cop out to end a relationship... but I can now attest from first hand experience, it is something that can truly happen.

"When I come back home can I meet him?" I asked her seriously, feeling her laughing against my shoulder.

"You're not going to act like an embarrassing older brother and try to scare him away, are you?" she asked me hesitantly, her brown eyes searching mine nervously. I chuckled lightheartedly at her question, "El, if anything, I'll be the obnoxious little brother that you try to avoid..." I replied with a wink.

She relaxed immediately as she gave me a sweet smile, "For some reason, I don't think you're kidding," she said with a laugh, shaking her head.

"His name is Jack, by the way," she mumbled softly, meeting my eyes.

I nodded my head, "Well... make sure you let Jack know... that he better watch himself," I advised, sounding menacing. Eleanor merely rolled her eyes at my threat before breaking out into a smile once again.

"I'm going to miss you, Louis," she whispered, giving me a tight hug. Pulling away, I could see a few unshed tears gleaming in her eyes, just waiting to break free. Seeing her like that made me get a thick feeling in my throat as I tried reassuring her that I'd always be there for her, if she needed me.

I was distracted as I heard the rumble of an engine and the sound of rubber tires crackling up the gravel ridden road. After a moment, a yellow cab emerged from around the corner, instantly drawing my eyes to meet Eleanor's.

"You're leaving?" I asked her, completely baffled, "You don't have to leave, El!" I said urgently, grabbing her arm as she jumped off of the back of the van.

"Louis, it's okay... you need to figure what you've got going on with Jetta; I've seen the way you look at her... it's the same way you used to look at me," she said with a sad smile, tucking her hair behind her ear. Okay, I'll admit that comment hurt a little bit.

"Are you sure? I really don't want you to go..." I trailed off as I followed her over to the car. She gave me a bemused smile, "Louis, tell everyone I said, bye...Ok?" she asked me as she wrapped her arms around me in a hug. I felt her hiccup against my shoulder, and a few drops of wetness dripped off of her chin as we said our goodbyes. Although we both needed to let go and move on... it still hurt like hell.

This moment just felt so surreal... I was speechless. On one hand I felt incredibly relieved that I wasn't hurting her... but on the other hand, Eleanor had been a big part of my life for such a long time... it felt like I was just letting her walk right out of my life. I pulled her even more tightly against me, "We're still going to stay friends, right?" I asked, catching her eyes as they crinkled into a silly grin.

"Louis, I'm just booting you out of my love life... not my entire life completely," she teased as she flicked me on the nose. I smirked at her as I hugged her again. Reluctantly, I pulled away, taking a deep breath, watching one last time as she sent me the smile that had once made me weak at the knees. It felt physically painful as I released her hand which I'd been holding, she spun on her heel and her brown hair fluttered out around her shoulders as she slid into the waiting cab.

I came to the window, leaning my arms on it as she rolled it down, "Thank you for everything, El. You have been my rock throughout these past two years..." I trailed off as she leaned in and placed one last, innocent kiss on my lips. She pulled away, patting my cheek gently; after looking at her for a few more seconds, I backed away from the vehicle, watching as it began to pull away.

Love is such a funny thing. When exactly does there come a point in a relationship when realization hits us and we decide we are ready to move on? I don't remember waking up one morning and just deciding that Eleanor and I were slowly drifting apart. The worst part is, even though we see it happening... there's really nothing we can do to stop it. We just need to move on, I guess. It would be nice to always know that the person you love today will still be there for you tomorrow... but the truth is... we just don't know that for sure. No matter the promises, sometimes people change... things change... and when they do, we need to change with them.

As I watched the cab turn around and head back down the deserted gravel road it came, I spied Eleanor's brown eyes once more as she turned in her seat, watching me as the distance grew between us. It hurt to just let her go like that... it killed me, but I saw a new light in her eyes. A light that I had apparently been dulling by trying to drag our relationship along. A long sigh left my lips as the car turned around the bend, vanishing from my sight; I was just left alone, staring off into nothing as the scorching sun continued beating down on my back. Although a part of my heart felt broken, I couldn't help but smile... where could this leave me with Jetta?

As soon as the thought entered my mind however, the smile fell from my lips; she fucking hates me now. There's no way she'll even talk to me after what I said to her. The little bit of hope that had been bubbling within my nervous stomach was suddenly extinguished, leaving me feeling cold and abandoned. Why did I always have to screw everything up?

  ***** (After the boys sing Truly, Madly, Deeply- Still Louis' P.O.V *****

As we finished the song, my eyes were glued to Jetta; I thought she would have broken eye contact with me by now, yet there she was, still giving me a look mixed with confusion and something else I couldn't decipher. I noticed after a moment she broke out of her trance and was slowly looking around the fire, as if she were searching for someone. Her sky blue eyes fell back on me once more and my eyebrows rose as she mouthed, "Eleanor?"

Oh... right. She wasn't aware of El's... departure. I shook my head gently before motioning over toward the edge of the clearing, near the woods. She looked hesitant for a moment to meet me, but after a few seconds, she gave me a subtle nod before getting to her feet and making her way in the direction I had signaled.

I cleared my throat before leaning over toward Zayn, "I'll be right back," I whispered, jumping up and running off before he got a chance to reply.

Jetta was leaning against a thick oak tree, facing away from me with her arms crossed over her chest. She was still wearing her bikini top but now had pulled on some blue jean cut-off shorts. As I approached, it became apparent that she was tense as she kept tightening and relaxing her shoulders blades. I was trying to be sneaky as I came closer, but after the damn snapping of a twig gave me away, Jet turned around slowly to face me, her arms still crossed over her chest and her expression revealed a hint of trepidation.

No one said anything for a few minutes as we stood there, staring as well as somewhat glaring at one another. I cleared my throat to break the tension and Jetta dropped her gaze to look down at my feet before she spoke, "Where's Eleanor?" she asked, a slight edge in her voice.

I pursed my lips as I figured out the best way to go about this, "Jet-- I'm sorry," I began, but was immediately cut off as her voice overcame my own, "Lewis... I don't wanna hear it," she said flatly as she rolled her eyes and took a step closer to me. I smiled slightly at the nickname; I'd noticed that when she was mad, she would call me Louis... but any other time she called me 'Lewis.'

I let out an exasperated sigh, "El left," I said in a soft voice, "she called a cab and left this afternoon," I added as her brow furrowed and her eyes grew round.

"Why?" she asked, sounding somewhat worried. I gave her a strange look as I answered, "we decided that we were holding on to something that just wasn't working any more," I said with a shrug, meeting her gaze again.

Her eyes softened, "She wasn't upset?" Jet asked as she ran her fingers through her blonde hair, removing it from her face.

"Actually, she seemed rather relieved... that she wasn't going to hurt me by moving on; apparently she has met someone else back home," I whispered as I stepped closer to her.

She gave me a hard stare, "Why wouldn't you be hurt that she's moving on?" she inquired, biting her bottom lip.

I took a last step toward her so that there was no longer a gap separating us, "Isn't it obvious?" I asked, reaching my hand up to cup her chin, tilting her head up so that she'd look me in the eye.

I gave her a small smile as she returned a wary look, our faces began moving closer together and I felt my eyes slipping closed as my lips zeroed in on hers, however, at the last possible moment, she turned her head, so that my lips merely touched her cheek.

I pulled back, giving her a bewildered look, "Jetta?" I asked, my confusion quite obvious. I thought she'd be happy Eleanor had left... I thought she'd want to be with me. Jetta let out a small sigh before taking a step away from me, "You can't just think that because your girlfriend broke up with you, that I'm going to jump at the chance...?" she said, sadness in her voice.

"What do you mean?" I asked, feeling a hint of irritation sneaking up my spine, "I said I chose you," I whispered in a heated voice.

"Louis... you didn't choose me. I won by default. It seems to me that Eleanor knew what she wanted... who she wanted... but you were too scared... you only decided you wanted me after she said she was ready to move on" Jetta trailed off, breaking eye contact once more.

My eyes widened because of her accusation, "That's complete bullshit!" I said harshly as I stepped up to her, once more bridging the gap. She held her ground as I spoke through clenched teeth, "I jeopardized my entire relationship for you!" I said in a furious whisper.

She cocked an eyebrow before shaking her head, "Well, that seems to be something you're good at doing... jeopardizing relationships with people, I mean" she reiterated, crossing her arms again, hinting toward the things I had previously said to her, earning me this black eye.

I relaxed my shoulders, trying to keep my temper under control, "I don't know why... but you make me feel too many things. I feel excited, angry, anxious, overwhelmed... all at the same time, almost every time I'm with you," I commented randomly, leaning against the tree, "It's like my mind gets all clouded and I can't think straight..."

"Lou, I think we had some fun... but let's get real, you're leaving in a few days. Although we may have had some feelings... I don't think it's strong enough to last when you... leave," she said honestly. I had a feeling that there would be no changing her mind, she seemed reluctant to admit that she had any feelings at all for me. Maybe she really was afraid of falling in love... she'd mentioned that she didn't really believe in it before. Not saying I was in love with her... just saying... she was shutting me out without even giving me a chance.

"Can we stay friends, though?" I asked hopefully, not willing to just write her out of my life. Maybe she was right... maybe we could just cool off and get to know each other better.

A bashful smile formed on her lips, "You still want to be my friend?" she asked, sounding shocked.

I shrugged my shoulders, "Of course... why wouldn't I?"

She gave me a serious look, coming closer to me as she reached out, lightly tracing her hand across the side of my face that was bruising, "I'm really sorry I did that..." she voiced sheepishly, her nervous eyes studying mine.

I put my hand over hers, leaving it there as I stared back at her, "No... it's okay. I'm an idiot. I should have never said what I said. Don't ever think you were just some 'chick I bagged as an easy lay,'" I said, making finger quotes as I repeated the words she'd said on that first night we met; that night she labeled herself the 'pimp' while I was considered a 'hoe'.

She giggled slightly, "It meant something to me, you know?" I said softly, not waiting for a response, "You mean something to me..." I trailed off, still holding her hand against my cheek and watching in amusement as her cheeks slowly grew rosy.

Jetta nodded her head, dropping her hand from my face before speaking, "I just need time. We got in too heavy way too fast," she reasoned, looking back at the broken twigs and fading leaves under our feet.

"I understand... I messed things up. Just don't give up on me, okay? I'm happy I met you... and I wouldn't change anything," I said seriously, drawing her eyes to mine once more.

She nodded her head softly, stepping toward me and wrapping her arms tightly around my shoulders. I hugged her back, my fingertips skimming her bare waist, caressing her gently.

"I like it... because you don't just take my shit. You call me out when I'm being an ass... hell you punch me in the face when I'm being a prick," I whispered into her hair, feeling her giggling against my chest.

I pulled out of the hug, placing my hands on her shoulders, "Friends? We'll just see where things go...?" I questioned as I looked deeply into her eyes, admiring the fact I could see the reflection of the fire burning within them.

She nodded her head again, "Friends," she smiled, before kissing me on my bruising cheek. I let out a breath I'd been holding as she hugged me one last time; feeling her scorching skin once more under my roaming fingertips, I knew this was going to be a lot harder on me than it was going to be on her. No wonder she's afraid of falling in love... no one's ever been there to catch her.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Louis and Jetta finally came back from the edge of the clearing after twenty minutes or so, they seemed to be in good spirits, so I was just hoping that they worked out all of their issues. There had been more than enough drama unfolding this evening.

I noticed that Liam had been chatting up a pretty girl who I'd learned was called Natalie. She had shoulder length caramel colored hair and bright blue eyes that resembled Jetta's. She dressed comfortable in jeans and a tee shirt rather than heels and a mini skirt, very much reminding me of Channing's laid back style. Channing seemed to be rather fond of her, and she was speaking with the two of them as they stood together near the coolers; Chan had left me about five minutes ago to get us some drinks, but it seemed that she'd gotten sucked into a conversation.

Natalie was laughing as well as blushing at something Liam had whispered to her; she kept running her hands through her hair, and I could tell it was something of a nervous habit. She was cute and seemed sincere, so hopefully Liam could get her number or something... anything to help him get over his 'Dani' rut.

My mind continued to wander as I sat there quietly by myself, until something caught my eye, immediately causing me to jump up from my chair. It seemed that while I was being distracted by my own thoughts, Tate had inched his way even closer to Channing. He was standing with a group of his friends, but I could tell that he was watching her; she still had her back turned to him, so she was unaware of his presence. Liam noticed him though, and I could see him clenching his fist trying to keep himself composed. Natalie seemed to noticed his tension and lightly touched his arm, immediately drawing his eyes to her and a warm smile across his face.

Channing was about to bend over to retrieve the drinks when I saw Tate take another step closer so that he was almost behind her, I thunderously approached him, no longer caring who knew of this prick's shady history with Chan. I came up behind him, laying my hand on his beefy shoulder and roughly pulled him back, "Are yeh fuckin' mental?" I asked vehemently, giving him another rough shove so that he was no longer hidden in the shadows. He stumbled back slightly, quickly correcting his footing so he wouldn't lose his balance... unfortunately.

We'd drawn the attention of most of the people around us, but I didn't care anymore, "I tried tah let it go, mate. I tried to ignore yeh... but yeh know what? Fuck it. You need tah get the hell outta here. NOW," I said loudly, actually causing him to startle a little by the deep tone of my voice. He quickly composed himself, giving me a sinister smile.

"Hey man, c'mon," he said with his hands up, slowly walking back up to me. I stood my ground, with my shoulders straight and my fists clenched.

I could now feel the presence of Channing behind me, and I gently tried to nudge her away, I met Liam's eyes and he gave me a warning look; I motioned for him to pull Channing back, he nodded his head and proceeded to wrap his arm around her softly.

"Niall, don't... I don't want him to hurt you," she begged in a thick voice. I knew that's why she didn't want him to fight me; lucky for her, I'm one who's more equipped to fight with words. Let's face it... this dick would beat the shit out of me.

I matched his steps so that we were standing right in front of one another, "Who do you think you are?" he asked in an amused voice, "You're in a fucking boy band," he said with a laugh as if it were the funniest thing in the world.

He quickly stopped laughing once he realized no one was laughing with him, "You think you're better than me, Irish?" he taunted, putting his face uncomfortably close to my own, "because you have an accent and a lot of money?" he continued in a harsh tone.

"I don' think it... I know it," I said through clenched teeth, "I don' have tah hit women in order tah get them to touch me," I added on, not breaking eye contact. His eyes narrowed at me as I continued, "Do yer friends know how much of a man yeh are, Tate?" I asked sarcastically, "Do they know how you force yerself on women?" I continued.

His eyes left mine and they immediately darted around to all of the nearby faces as I continued speaking, "Because if not... well then I guess they do now," I said with a shrug of my shoulders.

He laughed uneasily, "Like anyone is going to believe anything that you say, or that lying bitch," he said accusingly, pointing in Channing's direction.

The air was deadly silent as everyone seemed to be processing what was going on, trying to wrap their minds around the idea that their friend was actually a disgusting monster.

"What the hell is he talking about, Tate?" Jetta asked as she stepped up next to me, "Did you fucking touch her?" Jetta asked sounding equally pissed and horrified.

I watched Jetta as she looked over to Channing, they locked eyes and Chan gave a small nod as she looked at the ground, as if she were embarrassed.

Jet was about to pull her arm back, every intention of laying out another punch, but I immediately grabbed her, holding her arms down and pulling her back as she littered the air with enough profanities to make a sailor uncomfortable. She spat in his face as I pushed her away, looking around frantically for help.

"I think yeh just need tah leave," I said strongly, still trying to hold Jetta back. Harry came up to my side, and I handed Jetta over to him. She was like an angry Chihuahua when she was pissed... and it was hard to hold her back.

"Shhh," I could hear him trying to soothe her as he overpowered her, walking away toward the lake to calm her down. In the exchange, I had noticed Channing had a few trails of wetness down her cheeks as she watched on. Her eyes grew wide and horrified as she looked over my shoulder, and as I quickly turned around to see what had gotten her so worked up, I was met with fist as it connected with my mouth, instantly sending me to the ground. Loud screams broke out as I quickly tried to roll over and cover my face and head. So that's how he likes to play... giving out cheap shots. Should have figured that.

I felt like one of those cartoon characters, in the fact that I could see stars as I tried to pull myself up, out of the dirt. I crawled onto my hands and knees as I tried to shake my head to clear my vision.

"Liam, let me go!" I heard Channing's frantic voice over all of the commotion; I could tell that someone was trying to pull Tate back, but he still had enough time to lay a well placed kick right into my stomach, immediately causing me to fall back to the ground. I swear, the earth was spinning way too quickly as I tried to stand back up, however, my legs gave out and I fell back down to my knees. A white searing pain spread throughout my body, leaving no part untouched.

I felt someone swoop in on top of me, at first I feared it was Tate, but then I noticed the delicate hands and soft touch of Channing. She was covering me with her body as she hugged me around my neck. I started to panic because I wasn't sure if Tate was yet contained and I didn't want him to hurt her, "Channing... go!" I said in a rough voice, trying to push her back toward Liam. I glanced to my left to see both Zayn and Louis trying to push Tate away from us.

"NO!" she screamed defiantly. After that, I felt her leave my side and I was relieved at first because I thought that she had listened, but that was until I heard her voice screaming at someone in the direction I didn't want her going in.

I managed to roll over so that I was sitting up and looked to see Channing steadily approaching Tate, who was standing just a few feet away from me. Zayn and Louis were holding Tate back still as he tried to approach Channing; I also realized that Jetta's friend, Blake, was on the ground holding his face in his hands; apparently he had been the one to try to help and gotten a left hook to the jaw as well.

Everyone was just sort of sitting there in shock as they watched Channing march up to Tate, and without taking a second to think about her actions, she slapped him clear across the face. His shocked face flew to the left from the impact and he slowly brought his hulking frame to stand menacingly over Channing.

"Are you fucking serious, Channy? Oh you shouldn't have done that..." he whispered with a disgusting smile. He elbowed Louis in the gut and shoved Zayn off of him as he looked down angrily at Channing. I quickly got up and tried to hobble over to where they were standing, my stomach felt like it was being ripped apart with each step, and I could feel blood trickling, down my chin, confirming my suspicion that I had a busted lip.

Before I could even reach her, I was surprised to hear Channing's strong voice speaking out, completely disregarding his threats, "No... you know what Tate? You are the one that shouldn't have done that!" she screamed, pointing to me as I wrapped my arms around her, trying to get her to take a step back.

She remained planted in place, so I just stood somewhat in front of her, trying to shield her from anything Tate might try to do. Before he could get a word in edgewise, Channing was speaking again, "You are a pathetic, sorry, excuse for a man. Do you know I was going to protect your secret? I was going to let you just have that little victory if it meant you would leave me alone... but you couldn't do that, could you?" she screamed, and before I could stop her she reached up and slapped him across the face once more so that his face swung in the other direction from the impact.

As he turned his head back to her, his eyes morphed to black and I could see an unstoppable rage bubbling within him. I gulped loudly at the fact that I was probably going to get the shit kicked out of me, but as I was about to take another step in front of her to shield her entirely, she placed her hand on my chest pushing me back so I would stay in place. I gave her an incredulous look, "What are yeh doin'?!" I whispered urgently, still trying to move in front of her.

Her eyes softened as she looked at me, almost as if she were pleading for me to trust her; reluctantly, I took a step back so that I was standing to the side of her. She looked back at Tate who was just glowering down at her with complete confusion, "Go ahead... hit me. Back me into the wall and smack me across the face. Put your hand over my mouth to muffle the screams while you help yourself to touching my body..." she taunted, her voice shaking slightly, not from fear, but from anger.

I was no longer looking at Tate, my eyes were drawn to Channing and the fierce look she possessed as she belittled him and revealed a past that he wasn't wanting anyone else to know about. He took a step away from her before rethinking his decision and getting even closer up to her face, raising his hand up in the air as if he was deciding whether or not to strike her.

"Go ahead, Tate, " she whispered again, making him look down at her, his greasy black hair sliding into his eyes.

As he was pulling his hand back, I looked behind me to see that mostly everyone had their phones out, and were videotaping the ordeal, I smirked and cleared my throat slightly to gain his attention, "Looks like yeh got quite tha audience, mate," my words falling from my lips in a harsh, condescending manner.

He looked up, his eyes growing wide as he realized he wasn't going to win this time. He gave Channing one last look before stepping even farther away; turning his back on us as he stalked out into the night, without another word.

I let out a sigh of relief as I felt Channing relax under my arms, "What were yeh thinkin'?" I asked as I gave her an amazed look. She shook her head and looked up at me shyly, "To be honest I was just praying he would notice the cameras and back off," she whispered back, looking again into the darkness where he disappeared. I just stared at her, hugging her against my side, and she turned toward me, I noticed a few tears slipping down her cheeks, "What's tha matter, love?" I asked worriedly, not quite sure of why she was crying.

She brought her hand to under my lip, wiping what I was assuming was my blood off of my face, "I'm so sorry that he hit you, I shouldn't have tried to keep it a secret," she said with a trembling voice, her eyes roaming over my face, searching for any extra damage she may have missed.

I took her hand in mine as I lifted her chin up so she'd meet my eyes, "Channing, you are so much stronger than even I was givin' yeh credit for, yeh know that?" I asked her, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her against me. She leaned in gently, placing a kiss on my injured lips, causing me to wince slightly. She immediately pulled away, offering me an apologetic smile before I swooped in and kissed her again, ignoring the sharp pain as I brushed my lips against hers.

After a few seconds, she pulled away, giving me an amused grin, "If it hurts you don't have to kiss me," she said softly studying the gash in my lip.

"It doesn't," I lied as I tried kissing her again, what can I say... this pissed off, bad ass Channing was incredibly sexy. Before my lips could touch hers again though, she pulled back, laughing even more, "Okay... right. Well, regardless... you are bleeding, Nilla. As in... I can taste your blood," she said hesitating slightly, "I love you, but, this isn't _Twilight_ and I don't want to  _sook yer blahd_ ," she giggled in a terrible Count Dracula accent as she began pulling me over toward the coolers, offering to clean me up.

I looked at her sheepishly as we sat down on the ground, "Sorry 'bout that," I said with a blush as she took a towel, dipped it in cold water and began dabbing at the cut on my lip. She brought her backpack to her lap, pulling out a first aid kit, "Where tha hell did yeh get that?" I asked, surprised that she brought one; I never noticed her packing one before.

She laughed a little as she dug around for the antiseptic cream and a cotton ball to apply it, "The last gas station we stopped at, I saw it at the counter and figured it'd be a good idea," she said with a smirk, "Looks like I was right..." she sang as she applied a few drops of hand sanitizer, rubbing her hands thoroughly.

"Aren't you always?" I quipped as she prepared to wipe the cleanser across my mouth. She nodded while laughing, "You're such a suck up!" she exclaimed as she flicked me in the nose. I pouted as she rolled her eyes, "Ok... this might hurt for a second," she warned as she brought her hand up to my bottom lip, causing me to roll my eyes.

She shrugged her shoulders before gingerly apply the cold cotton ball to my mouth. I immediately felt the sting; my eyes began to water as I took a harsh breath in through my teeth, "Shit," I muttered quietly as she watched my reaction in an amused fashion. I began laughing with her for a moment, but immediately stopped, clutching at my stomach, "Ouch," I said flatly.

"Let me see," she demanded, reaching for my shirt, raising it slightly to view the nasty bruise that was forming across my ribs. She pushed on the skin gently, causing me to pull away from her. She gave me a sad look before reaching for my hand and pulling me to my feet, "Can we go lay down?" she asked as we neared one of the empty tents; she pulled me into the tent, quickly pulling the zipper up, Channing crawled back over to me, cuddling up to my side.

We laughed as we heard a few wolf whistles, mostly from Louis, at our hasty retreat into the tent. I began laughing especially hard as I heard Louis' obnoxious voice, "Oooh... if the tent's a rockin', don't come a knockin'!!"

Channing rolled her eyes after she heard everyone laughing at his remark, "He's so stupid," she mumbled, burying her face into my chest. The events from the evening were allowing the exhaustion to set in; I rolled over onto my side, entangling my legs with Chan's as I leaned my head down, resting my cheek on top of her head.

"Where's your favorite place to be? Like... out of all of your traveling?" she asked randomly; I watched her lips moving as she spoke, further distracting me from answering the question.

I subtly brought my hand up so that it was resting on her chest. She gave me an amused look, probably thinking that I was trying to be cheeky, but I just shook my head; I left my hand in the place where I had intended it to go... directly over her heart. The gentle thumping that vibrated off of my fingertips made me smile as I let my eyes close and began humming.

"Right here is my favorite place tah be," I whispered, "Anywhere that I can still feel this..." I paused as we listened to the beating of her heart, "Anywhere that you are... is my favorite place tah be, love," I said honestly as her grey eyes locked onto mine.

I moved my head down so that I was resting my ear against her chest, the thumping being significantly magnified because of my close proximity. Before I knew it, my eyes were slipping shut; all I could remember feeling were her gentle fingers as they traced up and down my spine and the beat of her heart lulling me to sleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Harry's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As soon as I realized a confrontation was taking place I dropped my beer I'd been holding and ran over to check out the scuffle. I was a little shocked when I saw Jetta screaming loudly at that bastard, Tate. Niall looked like he was holding her back as she tried to break free; I stepped forward, meeting his frantic gaze and grabbing Jet around the waist.

I pulled her against me, turning her away from the scene as I layed her head against my chest, "Shhh..." I whispered soothingly, stroking her hair. She released an exasperated groan as I continued pulling her down toward the lake. Although angry Jetta was extremely sexy, I didn't want her as pissed off as she was earlier.

"C'mon love, let's go sit on the dock," I whispered, pretty much dragging her in the direction I wanted her to go. She stopped resisting after a few seconds, making my life tremendously easier.

Jet had yet to utter a word since I dragged her away to the lake, "Are you okay?" I asked with slight hesitation.

We sat at the edge of the dock, I cringed as I watched her place her feet into the hauntingly dark water, whereas, I decided to just sit Indian style. Call me a pussy, but I don't like the idea of dangling my feet over a scary, dark abyss. Who knows what could be lurking down there.

I stared wearily down at the dark water, hearing a small giggle slip from Jetta's lips as I continued to look uneasily into the darkness, "Something funny?" I asked, with a small smile.

"Princess Kitty Paws... are you afraid to put your feet in the water?" I winced at the mention of my "nickname," turning my head to give her a tight smile, "Kinda," I whispered, feeling embarrassed.

She laughed lightly, kicking her feet in the water, making it splash me, "Come on Harry... it's sooo refreshing.... just give it a try," she encouraged rather condescendingly. I looked up, meeting her eyes; although it was pitch black outside, the moonlight shining down on the lake was enough to illuminate her bright eyes.

I sighed in exasperation as I reluctantly stuck one foot into the scary chilly water, followed by another. I looked back toward the fire to see that Tate was now gone and Channing and Niall were sitting on the coolers laughing. Thank God nothing too bad came out of that fight.

I was pulled back to reality as I heard Jetta's teasing voice, "Hey Harrrry....?" she asked, looking up at me with big eyes and a devious smile.

"Yeah?" I asked, slightly afraid of her behavior.

"I know the best way to help with your fear of the dark, scary lake water..." she trailed off.

"Ok....?" I replied, waiting for her to explain herself. Suddenly, all thought scattered out of my brain as I felt a rough shove against my shoulder and my unsuspecting body hurdled down to the cryptic darkness below. The cool water swallowed me up and I was overrun with goose bumps, not because of the temperature, but because I was terrified something was going to grab a hold of my ankle and drag me down to hell.

As fast as I could, I kicked back up to top, breaking the surface as I frantically looked around, trying to figure out my surroundings. I heard her light, tinkling laughter as Jetta sat on the dock, completely laughing her ass off at my expense.

"The hell, Jetta!?" I yelled up at her, glaring angrily. She sobered up quickly, cutting off her laughter almost instantly as she stood up and slowly removed her shorts. I stopped my complaining as I watched her stand up and without a word, she dove right in, the water parting beautifully to let her pass into it's midst. I expected for her to resurface immediately, but of course she decided to play a game with me instead.

It'd been about thirty seconds and Jetta had yet to pop her head up for air. I frantically swam toward the area where she'd hit the water, moving my hands blindly under the water, trying to feel for her.

"Jet? This is stupid, c'mon," I complained as I turned around in a circle, trying to see if she was above the water anywhere, having a laugh at me.

Worry began to sink in and I started to seriously think she was floating unconscious somewhere in the black water; I was about to swim toward the dock to yell for help, when I suddenly felt a tight grip on my ankle. I spazzed out completely, kicking and yelling, trying to get back to the safety of land.

After just a few seconds, the hand released me and I was met with a hysterical Jetta as she slipped above the surface. She was laughing so hard, she choked on some water and began coughing violently. I smacked her on the back a few times to help her out, but never removed the glare from my face as I stared at her, shaking my head.

"That was not funny. At all," I said, seriously.

"Says you!" she giggled some more as she floated even closer to me. We were out rather deep into the water now, so we could no longer touch the lake floor. We were treading water together as she continued to swim closer, surprising me when she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Hey, remember, you said you wanted to see who can hold their breath longer..." she trailed off as she gave me a little smirk. I narrowed my eyes at her as I absentmindedly wrapped my arms around her waist, "Oh, you are so on," I replied as we floated a little closer to the dock so we could touch the bottom.

Our faces were still very close together as we stood face to face with one another, "Care to make this interesting?" I asked, staring at her intently.

"What did you have in mind," she asked as she wrapped her arms around my neck once more, as well as her legs around my waist. Jesus Christ... if she was using this as a distraction technique... then it was definitely working.

I cleared my throat as I tried to not focus on the fact that our special places were pretty much grinding together, "We'll play a few times, who ever loses has to remove an item of clothing," I smiled as I sent her a wink.

She narrowed her eyes at me, before quickly agreeing, "You're on! Get ready to get naked, Hazzy," she teased as she backed away from me, trying to give herself space.

On the count of three we both took in a deep breath of air and slipped under the dark blanket of water. Surprisingly, I wasn't nervous about being in the water any longer... Jetta seemed to suck all that fear right out of me.

Although I couldn't see her because of the darkness, I reached my hand out so that it was closed around hers, I didn't want to go floating off into oblivion. We remained under the water, it may have been nearing a minute when I felt her kick her feet frantically, swimming back to the surface.

"Is that seriously all you've got," I asked in a bored tone, pushing my curls off of my forehead.

"Pfft... did you ever think that maybe I just wanted to get naked?" she asked indignantly. I laughed at her slight attitude, "Sure, sure," I said, waving my hand at her dismissively.

She then gave me an evil smirk as she swam closer to me, "Harry, can you help me with my top?" she asked innocently, as she wrapped her arms around my neck, "Just untie it for me," she whispered, laying her cheek against my shoulder. My fingers slowly slid down her back, until I met the knot of her bikini top. With one quick tug, I released the thin straps so that they fell and began floating aimlessly.

She was still pressing her body against me, even after the bikini top was no longer present. With the flick of her hand, she easily discarded the top, throwing it on the deck so it landed with a "plop."

"Care to go again," Jet asked me while I watched her lips move but refused to hear anything she was saying.

I watched her pink lips as they curved into a smirk; I held her even more tightly against me, "Not really," I mumbled, as I quickly ducked my head down, meeting my lips with hers. She didn't resist as I thought she would, rather, she trailed her fingers against the back of my head, tugging lightly on my hair. We continued to drift in the water, as my lips nibbled and bit at hers tenderly.

I moved her head to the side as I brought my lips down her neck and back up again. She tasted of mint and Dr. Pepper, which caused me to smile as her lips latched onto mine.

Our heavy breathing intensified as we continued to get even more lost in the moment. Although I felt like the biggest pussy in the world, I reluctantly released her lips and urged her to meet my eyes.

"Jet... what's going on between you and Louis?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Jetta's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As soon as the question left his mouth, I immediately felt dirty. What the hell was I doing? Sure I liked Harry... but why was I throwing myself at him?

I quickly pushed away from him, trying to swim back toward the dock. He looked perplexed as I turned around to see him swimming behind me. I grabbed my top and quickly tied it around myself once more so that I was properly covered.

"Jetta--?" he started to call my name as he climbed out of the water behind me, but I quickly turned around and cut him off.

"Harry, I'm sorry. Just... I don't know what's wrong with me, ok? I'm sorry," I stared into his eyes for a moment before spinning around and running off toward the tents. I noticed that Louis was sharing with Liam and Zayn was in the other one. Honestly, I didn't feel like being bothered so I just kept walking until I got to the van. After prying the door open, I climbed into the backseat, pulling my knees up to my chest, curling into a little ball.

In my haste to get to the van, I hadn't stopped to get clothes or even a blanket, so I was laying there, just shivering in my wet bathing suit. I wasn't about to walk back out there and face Harry so I just wrapped my arms tighter around myself, trying to fall sleep. I felt like I was teetering on the edge of sleep when I heard the soft 'pop' of a door opening. Rather than open my eyes to investigate, I just allowed sleep to consume me, feeling slightly warmer as a light pressure was draped across my body.

***

The sun was shining through the windows, prying me out of my blissful darkness. Although it was rather chilly in here last night, now that it was morning and the sun was beating down, it was getting uncomfortably warm inside the van. As I began wiping the sleep from my eyes, I was about to pull my hand up, only to realize that something was closed around it; curiously, I peeked over the edge of the seat to see a mop of curly hair, cuddled up on the van floor.

I realized the weight I felt on my arm was in fact, his fingers entwined with my own. I smiled at his thoughtful actions, kicking off the blanket he must have covered me with last night. I tried to carefully pull my hand out of his grasp, considering I had a slight cramp in my shoulder, but as I tried to pull away, I must have startled Harry because he violently tugged on my arm, making me slide off the seat and right on top of him.

His green eyes shot open instantly at the unexpected added weight as I grinned at him sheepishly, "Sorry..." I mumbled, trying to pull my body off of his. My attempts were futile however, because he wrapped his arms around me, holding me in place. I didn't say anything as my eyes captured the adorableness of his morning features: his sleepy but bright eyes, his crazy mop of curls, his crooked smile.

The smile slowly slid from his face as he studied mine, as if remembering last night, "Why'd you run off like that?" he asked, his voice rough from sleep. The sound was orgasmic, I'm telling you.

"I don't know... I'm sorry... you didn't have to come in and sleep on the floor..." I trailed off, not meeting your eyes.

He chuckled as he pushed some of my tangled hair behind my ear, "Jet... I wanted to. Hmm... sleep with Zayn or sleep with Jetta," he pondered as he pretended to be thinking, "Yeah not really a hard decision to make," he finished, offering me a cheeky smile.

I rolled my eyes, laying my head on his bare chest. I found my fingertips slowly exploring him, tracing the contours and defined lines of his torso. I subtly glanced up to his face, watching as his eyes closed, apparently giving me free reign over his body.

As we laid together in silence, I couldn't help but to compare Harry with Louis. When I was with Lou, I felt so many things... and he always managed to piss me off, but he also made me laugh like no one else could. It was a strange relationship, but no matter what, I found it hard for me to keep my hands off of him; when I was with Harry... things felt different. I felt safe for one thing. Overall, the moments I shared with Harry were just a lot sweeter than they seemed to be with Lou. On paper, Harry seemed perfect for me; he was affectionate, caring, considerate, and respectful. Whereas, Louis was domineering, assertive, and at times, rude as fuck... he honestly is a sassy little drama queen.

They were so different and brought out such different parts of my own personality; however, the one I constantly found my mind flitting back to was always Louis. There was just something I could see in him, something passionate that I wanted to explore.

"Jet?" Harry's voice pulled me out of my thorough self-analysis, "Hmm?" I mumbled back, looking up at him as I continued to trace my fingers along his chest.

He paused for a moment, as if considering what to say, "I know I'm leaving soon... but I really like you. Would it be alright if I... I don't know... took you out?" he asked bashfully, not meeting my eyes.

I felt a giddy smile crossing my face, any thoughts of Louis long forgotten, "Are you asking me... out on a date?" I replied, biting my lip as his eyes met mine.

"Seems that way," he mused, as he cupped my cheek with his hand, rubbing his thumb soothingly against my skin. He looked a little concerned, but I just gave him a flat look, "As if I could reject Harry Styles," I giggled, rolling my eyes dramatically.

His smile fell, "No, Jet... I want you to go out with me because I'm Harry, from Holmes Chapel, not Harry Styles from 'One Direction'," he said, a slight bitterness in his voice. I was taken aback by the vulnerability I felt radiating out of him as I met his eyes.

He looked away, turning his head to the side, sighing deeply. I felt my heart ache for him, "No... Harry... I was teasing," I immediately whispered, gently grabbing his chin and turning his head to look at me. I absentmindedly stroked his cheek as I buried my face into his neck, hugging him tightly, "I like you for you... not for your Hollywood image," I said softly, trying to sound sincere; because after all, I was being honest. I really did like him, but I also liked a certain cheeky, striped-shirt loving, sassmasta. 

His bright smile made me smirk in return and I leaned forward, touching my lips lightly to his. However, Harry gently wrapped his fingers around the back of my neck, deepening the kiss. After a few seconds, we pulled away to catch our breath and although his playful eyes were sparkling at me, I was still caught up on that kiss. It was sweet and lovely... but it was the urgency of it that slightly worried me.

Hell, for all I knew, maybe neither of them actually liked me. Maybe I was just a pawn in their game... maybe they were just trying to see who could come out on top.


	26. Oh, Sweet Perfection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall plays a song he _"wrote"_ for Channing at the concert... but don't worry about the cliché serenading bc SHOWER SEX happens... hollllller.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song _Sweet Perfection_ in which Niall apparently _writes_ and then sings for Channing is actually by **nevershoutnever!**
> 
> i own nothing... duhhh c:
> 
> **p.s, this is a mature chapter... beware of shower sex**

Chapter 26: Oh Sweet Perfection

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o  
As Niall fell asleep with his ear against my heart, I smiled down at him, stroking his back lightly. I studied the gash in his lip and immediately felt horrible that he got hurt, I should have just been honest rather than tried to hide what really happened.  
When Niall took that punch in the face I about went postal on Tate for taking such a cheap shot. Ni is strong, I know he is and could probably have held his own a little bit in a fight, but when the guy takes a shot at you when you're not even looking... that's just complete bullshit.   
I'm not even sure what came over me as I slapped Tate across the face, all I could think about was how he punched Niall and kicked him while he was down. I was terrified of the damage Tate could have inflicted on him, therefore my mind had no say in the actions that my body enacted.

At first, I thought Niall would be upset with me for trying to stand up for him... but he surprised me in the fact that he treated me like an equal. Just as he tried to protect me, he also let me try to protect him... and that just warmed my heart a little. Most men held too much pride to let a women stand up for them; I was just happy to find out that Niall wasn't like that. He seriously was a carefree mofo... my carefree mofo.

I continued running my fingers through his hair, drawing a few unconscious groans from his lips, apparently, he liked the sensation. I smiled, giving him one last hug before relaxing my head back on the pillow. A smile remained on my face as I drifted away; it still scared me that he was leaving in two days... but I couldn't let myself worry about it. All I could think about was his warm breath blowing against my chest; for the first time, I felt like I had a beautiful life, all because of this beautiful boy... and I would do everything I possibly could to keep him in my life.

***

The next morning, I was ripped out of my comfortable slumber by a violent shake against my shoulder; my eyes flew open to see an apologetic looking Zayn as he continued trying to jostle me awake. Niall was still on my chest, and I cracked an eye open to see that Zayn was trying to shake him awake as well. A few unintelligible curses left Niall's lips as he hugged me tightly against him like a teddy bear, and rolled us further away from Zayn.

I giggled as he pulled the blanket over our heads, "Shh... don' make any sudden movements... maybe he'll go 'way," Niall whispered sleepily into my hair. I cuddled my face into his naked chest... good Lord, I wish I could wake up to this every morning.

"You both need to get your asses up! We're leaving!" Zayn hollered as he ripped the blanket away and chucked it out of the tent. That little wanker...

Niall let out an annoyed groan, still hugging me tightly, trying to keep his eyes squeezed shut, however, I was sad to say that I could no longer fall asleep after Zayn's little hissy fit. I began trying to wriggle out from under Ni's grasp, but immediately stopped as I heard him protest, "No... don't leave me... Please stay," he mumbled adorably. I decided to just relax against him, soaking up his warmth, what can I say? He's quite convincing.

After a few minutes of glaring, Zayn was still leaning over us, creepily, before I saw an evil smirk cross his face. He crawled over to Niall's bag that was left abandoned in the corner of the tent. I heard the familiar zip of the bag and the ruffling of papers; Niall's eyes shot open just as I heard Zayn reading from the paper in his hands;

_"I've been lookin' for a heart that's so complete,_ _So satisfied with the little things._ _I got you and that's enough for me,_ _So girl, can't ya see_ _That you and me Could be so free_ _And live happy?_ _So take my ha-"_

Niall shot up and in the blink of an eye was on top of Zayn, prying the paper from his fingertips. Zayn was laughing hysterically as Niall punched him in the arm, before shoving the wrinkled paper back into the bag. Slowly, he turned around giving me a sheepish look. I rose an eyebrow at the pair as Zayn continued laughing and Niall looked at him angrily, "Fuckin' cunt," Niall mumbled under his breath, causing me to laugh as well.

"Well, maybe next time you'll get up the first time I ask..." Zayn shot back, standing up to exit the tent. Was he taking sass lessons from Louis?

"Yeah, yeah... see if I tell yeh anythin' anymore," Niall replied harshly, but I could sense that he was somewhat joking.

I cleared my throat as I continued looking at Niall, however he kept adverting his gaze, "What was that about?" I asked curiously.

"Nuthin'... t'was nuthin'," he replied quickly, turning away from me as his cheeks grew redder by the second.

I bit my lip gently, "Were those... uhm... lyrics?" I questioned, smiling giddily at him.

His eyes met mine, and he quickly looked away, very subtly nodding his head.

"Awe... Nilla," I cooed, quickly making my way over to him and crawling into his lap, "I want to hear it!" I said with excitement, trying to give him my best set of puppy dog eyes.

He immediately shook his head, "Don' gimme tha' look, it's not finished yet... yeh can't hear it 'til I've finished it," he replied, shaking his head adamantly. I pouted for a second, but then decided I wasn't going to push him on it.

"'sides... when will I get tah hear yer song?" he asked, giving me a pointed look. I shrugged my shoulders before quickly kissing him on the nose, "NEVER..." I whispered before jumping up from his lap and running out of the tent.

I looked around, realizing Zayn wasn't kidding when he said we were leaving; everything was pretty much packed up. I looked around in confusion, spotting Jetta standing by the van, I hurried over to ask her what was going on; we were supposed leave this afternoon, not 6 o'clock in the damn morning.

"The boys have a last minute interview that they have to get back for," she said rolling her eyes as she stuck her tongue out at Louis. I was a little miffed when I saw Harry standing behind her, with his arm around her waist. Jetta noticed my eyes scoping out the intimate gesture, and she shook her head, letting me know she'd fill me in later. I also noticed Louis' sour look as he watched Harry whispering something into Jet's ear. Oh good lord... not this again.

I shrugged my shoulders and ran back over to the tent to make sure that Niall and I weren't forgetting anything, only to see Niall cuddled back under the thin blanket, fast asleep. I crept over to him, looking down for a few moments at his peaceful face; I got down on my knees, and pushed my lips against his. At first he didn't seem to notice, but as I added more pressure, his eyes slowly cracked open.

I placed my hands gently around his face as I put more into the kiss, trying to get him to really wake up. After a few seconds, things became extremely heated, and I found myself pulling away to catch my breath.

I propped myself up on my elbow as I laid next to him; watching as he smiled, "Now, that's the perfect way to wake up," he said with a laugh as he swooped in for one more kiss.

We heard someone clear their throat from the tent opening, and turned to see an amused looking Zayn staring back at us, "Don't expect me to wake you up like that, mate," Zayn quipped before disappearing once again. Niall rolled his eyes, turning back towards me; we cuddled for a few more minutes before reluctantly gathering our things and meeting everyone at the van.

Before we left, we placed Jetta's camera on the hood of the van and set it on timer mode so we could all get in the picture. As we all tried to figure out what pose we were going to do, the stupid thing went off when no one was ready. After another five tries, we finally got a decent picture, Niall was giving me a piggy back as I smiled at the camera and he had his head turned, smiling at me, Jetta was in the middle of Harry and Louis, each of them giving her a kiss on the cheek, and Liam was holding Zayn bridal style. Awww... Ziam. Pretty much... it was a perfect way to end this mini camping trip.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o  **Louis' P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

We were all piled into the cramped van once more, and I was lucky enough to have Jetta sitting next to me once more in the passenger seat... note sarcasm. We hadn't spoken much since our conversation last night, however, I could tell that things were tense between us once more when I saw Harry's arm around her waist this morning as we were waiting for Niall and Channing to get their asses moving. Needless to say, I'd been somewhat ignoring her since I noticed Harry holding her hand and stealing kisses from her openly. Is that what's up Jetta? Is that why you want to be "just friends"? I rolled my eyes as I analyzed the situation in the privacy of my mind.

I shook my head to clear my thoughts, my eyes catching Jetta's iPod which was sitting on the docking station. It was playing some song I didn't recognize. I subtly picked it up, looking out of the corner of my eye to see Jetta was staring out the window, chewing on her bottom lip. I smirked as I clicked around her iPod... until I found the perfect song. I found it easier to talk to her through song lyrics... is that weird? I clicked on a song called "Fool for You" before turning it up significantly and clearing my throat so that she'd look my way;

_"She floats like a butterfly, stings like a bee,_ _Notorious just like B.I.G._ _She's got me looking over my shoulder,_ _Short red dress with thin white tights._ _Bubblegum lips and starry blue eyes,_ _She's building me up an American dream."_

Jetta slowly turned away from her window, meeting my eyes; I could tell she was trying to hide a little smile as she hardened her gaze and began shaking her head. I took a peek in the rearview mirror, everyone seemed too busy in their own conversations to even notice what we were doing. Good, I liked it better this way, without an audience.

_"She flirts with all my best friends,_ _Screams out and never listens._ _Tell me what's a, what's a fool to do? (fool to do)_ _She'll go down for no reason,_ _Steal from me when I'm sleeping..._ _Holding back her 'I love yous' (I love you)_

_So tell me why, tell me why,_ _You're always building up, just to bring me down._ _Look at you, look at you baby,_ _Callin my King, just to steal my crown._ _Didn't you, didn't you make me,_ _Fall for the games that you played with my head, girl."_

"How do you even know about South Jordan? They're not very well known in the US... let alone overseas..." she inquired, raising her brow as she spoke over the music.

"Honestly? I stole your iPod that first night you spent the night. You have good taste in music," I mumbled, gritting my teeth at the fact that I had just given her a compliment. Why was it impossible for me to stay mad at her? I sighed as I listened to the end of the song;

_"I let you get away with murder,_ _I guess I'm just a fool for you._  
 _No matter what we hear,_ _We'll turn the world away._ _Cause honestly, it's you and me, and nothing's gonna chage._ _What I'm trying to say, is it's enough for me,_ _Oohhh, it's enough for me._ _But you're building me up, building me up!_  
 _Oh, I guess I'm just a fool for you,_ _I'm a fool for you."_

She smiled as the song ended, turning toward me and reaching for her iPod; I focused my eyes on the road as I waited to hear what she was planning to unleash. She was humming softly under her breath as I looked over my shoulder to move into the next lane; after a few more seconds, I recognized the song that was slipping through the speakers;

_"We started off incredible_ _Connection undeniable_ _I swear I thought you were the one forever_ _But your love was like a loaded gun_ _You shot me down like everyone_ _'Cause everyone's replaceable_ _When you're just so incapable_ _Of getting past skin deep_  
 _Guess what, another game over_ _I got burned, but you're the real loser_ _I don't know why I've wasted my time with you_ _You're bad news, a history repeater_ _You can't trust a serial cheater_ _You're good at hooking up but you suck at love_  
 _You played me like an amateur_ _Then stabbed me like a murderer_ _I'm left for dead, another one of your victims_ _It's not like you're unpredictable_ _But your act is so believable_ _I know it's nothing personal, it's just business as usual_ _You're good at what you do"_

I found myself laughing at how ridiculous we seriously were; anytime we had a disagreement it either escalated into a fistfight or we would sit huddled together in the van, flinging songs back and forth at each other. Despite the fact that it sounded incredibly stupid, I found myself having fun with her regardless; even though I was irritated with her this morning, I knew by the time we got back to the hotel, things would be alright between us again.

That's what I really liked about Jetta... she wasn't someone that held onto grudges for too long. Even though I knew she seemed to be having something weird with Harry going on, I couldn't help but wish that she was mine. Maybe in time, we could work something out... maybe in time, she could learn to actually trust me. I zoned back in on the Simple Plan song that was blaring;  
 _"Now I kinda feel bad for you_ _You're never gonna know_ _what it's like to have someone to turn to_ _Another day, another bed_ _It's just a game inside your head_

_Guess what, another game over I got burned, but you're the real loser_ _I don't know why I've wasted my time with you_ _You're bad news, a history repeater_ _You can't trust a serial cheater_ _You're good at hooking up but you suck at love_  
 _You've messed this whole thing up_ _Well you were such an awesome fuck_ _But you suck at love, you suck at love"_

Now, I suppose that song was meant to bruise my ego, but as it ended, I merely found myself smiling and laughing like a hyena, specifically at the second to last line- Hey, what guy wouldn't be proud of that? We spent the remainder of the trip doing the same thing we did on the way there, playing songs that reminded us of the other. It was fun, and carefree; as I watched Jetta giggling particularly hard to "Troublemaker" by Olly Murs, I couldn't help but smile at her scrunched up nose and red cheeks. By now everyone in the van was annoyed with our constant laughing and song changing.

"Just leave it on one damn song!" Harry hollered grumpily from the backseat.

"Oh, shut it, Princess Kitty Paws," I responded, meeting his glare he sent me in the rearview mirror with a wink.

Harry rolled his eyes and slipped his hood over his head as I took the last exit to get off the highway. When I turned back to look at Jetta, I found her smiling at me, although when she noticed I'd caught her, she quickly averted her eyes to stare out the window once more. In that moment, I knew things weren't hopeless. I still had a chance with her... I just needed to go about things the right way this time.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o  **  
(Graphic Love Scene ;])** As we all made our way back into the hotel, we were quite a grumpy lot... some of us more so than others (ahem... Harry...) I took Channing's hand in mine as we squeezed into the elevator. Paul and the rest of the body guards were now with us once more, although it was nice to get a break from them for a few days, it was a relief to have them around again.

Paul was busy scolding Louis and I on our slightly roughed up appearances; Lou's eye was still bruised but healing and my lip was red and swollen. I nodded my head adamantly just praying that'd he'd shut up about it. Come on Paul... make up should cover it right?

"... and don't think that I need to just shut up because make up will cover it; you lads need to be careful, otherwise we won't be letting you out of our sights at all anymore," I rolled my eyes at his crazy mind reading skills as I dragged Channing over to our room. Jetta and Louis were messing around as they went into his room with a sour Harry walking in behind them. I shook my head at their crazy love triangle. Hopefully when they got some time away from Jetta, they would stop having this little... fighting thing they had going on... when Larry Stylinson was fighting... it just threw the world out of whack.

We had an interview in three hours, and there was something I really wanted to take Channing to do before we ran out of time. I still wasn't sure what was going to happen once we left... but I sure as hell wasn't leaving until I had a direct link of communication with her.

"Hey Chan, go get ready, we need to go to the mall," I said, urging her toward the bathroom so she could shower. She put her arms out, stopping herself by holding onto what was left of the door frame, "Wait, why?" she asked, looking over her shoulder and narrowing her eyes at me.

I shrugged my shoulders, "I just wanted to get you something... but it's a surprise," I insisted, giving her a wink.

She sighed, her eyes fluttering as she turned around, draping her arms around my neck, "But... Niall... I wanted your help with something..." she teased, whispering softly in my ear, instantly giving me chills down my back and arousing me in other... places.

I met her eyes... ugh... damn this girl. I knew what she was doing, and I was more than happy to oblige. I scooped her up into my arms, rushing her over to the sink. I sat her down quickly, and was about to brush my lips against hers, but instead I pulled away quickly. She shot me a frustrated glare as she watched me run out of the bathroom; I hurried toward the bedroom door and locked it before rushing back to her.

Channing rose her eyebrows as I ran back in, watching me as I hastily undid my belt; she placed her hand over mine to stop my movements, drawing my eyes up to meet hers, "What were you doing?" she asked, referring to when I left the bathroom.

"I didn't think you'd want a repeat of Zayn walking in on us..." I trailed off as I leaned her head back and began sucking gently on her neck; after leaving a small love bite, I pulled away, meeting her eyes once more, "... so I locked the door," I finished my sentence I'd started prior to latching onto her neck.

She gave me a small smile as she gripped the bottom of my tee shirt with both of her hands, quickly yanking it up over my head. Once it was off, she pulled me violently so that I was standing in between her legs, leaning against the sink. I pressed my lips against hers, feeling an urgency that I couldn't help but let flow through me as I laid my hand against her jaw, while the other slid up her back, quickly unclasping her bra.  

I pulled the bra off from under her tank top, tossing it over my shoulder. She giggled as her warm lips encased mine and her tongue massaged my own. My eyes closed of their own accord as I felt her fingertips slide up my torso, groaning softly as she scraped her fingernails lightly down my chest.

She fidgeted slightly to remove her bottoms, totally unconcerned with exposing her thighs or any other intimate parts. I couldn't help smiling at her willingness to be with me. Considering the hell she used to be subjected to, I felt truly thankful that she let me touch her... kiss her... love her.

She shoved my pants down and I swiftly stepped out of them as I pulled her off of the sink and into my arms; she wrapped her legs around my waist and rose her arms, requesting for the removal of her top. I immediately accepted the offer, gently tugging the little shirt over her head, dropping it carelessly to the floor; lust was pounding against my skull as I took in her beautiful face, her beautiful body, her beautiful... everything.

With her in my arms, I walked over to the shower, quickly turning the handle so that the hot spray could fill the bathroom with steam. My tongue traced feather light circles along her lips as I held her up against me, squeezing her bum gently; she would occasionally grind her body against mine, provoking me further and making my arousal very apparent.

"Someone's excited..." she teased me playfully, grinding her body on me once more, causing me to close my eyes and groan loudly.

"I can't help it..." I mumbled as I traced my tongue down her throat, nipping gently as I made my way to her collar bone.

"Why's that?" She asked, her breath hitching in her throat as I held her up with one arm, massaging her breast with my free hand.

"Yer jus' so..." I was unable to assemble an intelligible sentence as I felt her reach below, grasping my length firmly in her hand.

"So what?" she urged on, squeezing me gently, torturing me in the best way a person can be tortured.

"So... perfect," I whispered as I locked my eyes with hers. I could see a sense of wonder deep inside her eyes as we stood completely still, caught in a moment of perfect understanding. Her lips swooped in, capturing mine in a bout of passion.

"Wanna play a game?" she asked, huskily as I took a step into the shower; we shivered as the water covered our bodies in its welcomed warmth. I smirked at her question before nodding my head.

She grinned wickedly before wriggling out of my grasp and stepping back slightly, "Okay... here are the rules," she whispered as she let her fingers trace down my spine. As I looked down at her, I could see her chest pressing against me, and her teeth slightly biting her bottom lip; I had to look up for a moment so as not to lose control, pick her up and fuck her into the wall.

"Rules?" I parroted her, trying to place my hands against her delicate shoulders, but she pushed me away. She held up her finger and "tsked" like a parent would scold a misbehaving child. When I tried to step forward and wrap my arms around her waist, she pushed me away once more, causing me to groan in aggravation.

"The rules are..." she looked at me, those grey eyes locking me into a trance, "I can touch you, but you can't touch me," as the words left her lips she stepped toward me, immediately making me moan as she took me into her hands. My eyes quickly refocused on her, watching as the water droplets cascaded down her body, leaving wet trails which I was just dying to lick off of her.

As she stroked me gently, her lips moved all over my body, she stood on her tip toes as she slipped her tongue down my neck and left small kisses against my shoulders. My eyes widened as her lips trailed down my chest and stomach, ultimately leading her to get down on her knees.

She looked up at me one last time as she positioned her self in front of me, "Now... remember, I've never done this before..." she said playfully; before I even had enough time to comprehend what she had just said, I felt her warm mouth encasing my length, before sucking gently and licking the tip.

I finally managed to find my voice, "Chan... y-yeh  don' have tah do that..." I stutterd in a rather unconvincing voice.

I looked down just as she pulled her mouth away from me with an audible "pop," making both of us laugh, of course.

"You don't want me to?" she asked me off-handedly as she wrapped her lips around my shaft once more and began sucking. She had picked up her speed, once again making me incapable of speech. She obviously took my silence for her queue to continue, because she steadily began to pick up the pace. She wrapped her hands around my hips in order to steady herself, and as I tried to reach down to place my hand over hers, she playfully slapped me away.

I released a hiss between my teeth as I felt her slightly skim her own teeth against me, "Hey, no teeth," I chided playfully.

She gave me an embarrassed smile, "Sorry... but no touching me... remember?" she whispered before going down on me once more. I squeezed my eyes shut as she continued working faster and faster before slowing it down and teasing me by swirling her tongue around the tip. I groaned as she expertly used both her hand and her mouth to please me, and I couldn't help but gently moan out her name. I could feel the warm tension building  in the pit of my stomach, and I grunted as I tried to focus on hanging on as long as possible.

"Chan... I'm goin- I'm gonna come," I warned her, sounding breathless, as she continued vigorously pumping me in and out of her mouth. I looked down at her again, her eyes were aimed up at as she subtly nodded her head.  I looked down in awe as I again placed my hand on hers that was resting along my hip. This time, however, she didn't push me away; she even entwined our fingers, squeezing my hand tightly as she continued working me with her mouth, pushing me over the edge as I felt myself hit the back of her throat one last time. I squeezed my eyes closed, as my body shuttered violently, releasing into her mouth.

She let me slip out of her mouth before slowly standing up to wrap her arms around my neck once more; her eyes widened as I hoisted her up so that she was leaning between the wall and my hips. I wasn't about to be done with her just yet...

Her wide eyes looked at me curiously, "You can still keep going?" she asked as I feverishly attacked her lips. It was a little odd considering I could somewhat taste myself on her mouth, but I wasn't about to complain about it. I'm just not gonna think about it...

I chuckled at her question, "Yeah, we're not through yet, love," I whispered as I easily thrust myself inside of her. She moaned loudly, stiffening before immediately relaxing against my body. I gripped her bum tightly as I watched her face; the facial expressions she made when we were in the heat of the moment were extremely sexy, and overall just drove me insane.

I kissed her mouth gently as I rocked into her body, alternating between fast and slow thrusts. I tangled my fingers into her wet locks, tugging softly as she ran her fingertips along my back. I buried my face into the crook of her neck as I continued holding her trembling body against mine. I silenced her moaning as I captured her lips, shivering slightly as I felt the vibration of her moans as they danced across my tongue, "Yeh didn' have tah do that, yeh know?" I mumbled against her chin as I rested my cheek against hers; I slowed down my thrusts as I tried to talk to her.

"I w-wanted to..." she whispered back, obviously trying to get control of her voice. I smirked as I picked up the pace once more, thrusting deeply inside of her before pulling out and doing it all over again. I didn't expect her to speak again, so it surprised me when she did, "I-I want to experience everything with you, Niall. Anything and every- th-thing out there... I want to have it all with y-you," she spoke, trying to catch her breath in between every few words.

My eyes met hers once more and I leaned my forehead against hers; I watched her face contort into a state of euphoria as she gripped my shoulders tightly and began breathing harshly against my lips. I looked on in fascination as she came undone right in front of me.

She tightened her legs around my waist and wrapped her arms around my neck before leaning her head back and yelling out, sounding breathless, "Niall!" I began panting loudly under the strain as I thrust deeply into her withering body. As she came free falling over the edge of satisfaction, I could feel her body tightening and clenching around me, the sensation pushing me over the edge as well.

I embraced her tightly as we road out our orgasms together; I kissed her forehead as I delivered one final thrust before stopping all movement and holding completely still. Channing was still breathing heavily as I rested inside of her; I pressed my swollen lips to hers, kissing her tenderly as she cupped my face in her hands. The water was still beating down my back, and I figured she might be cold, so with out pulling out of her, I turned around and held her up so that she was the one in the warmth of the shower.

Her body relaxed and she lowered her face to rest between my neck and shoulder, her lips ever so lightly kissing my skin, "I love you, Niall," she whispered, her lips still pressed to my neck.

I slowly pulled out, immediately hating the loss of contact, but she continued to keep her legs wrapped around me, clinging to me adorably, "Chan... I fall more in love with yeh ev'ry damn second," I mumbled before pressing my lips fiercely to hers, savoring the taste of her tongue, and the beat of her frantic heartbeat.

I guess I would just have to ask Jetta to help me get Channing to the mall while we were at our interview...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After Niall and I finished... showering... we got ready because it was almost time to head out for the boys interview. We got to the studio, and the guys went out to talk to the host while Jetta and I hung out in the back room, stuffing our faces with all the food that was sitting out on the table. Hey... finders keepers.

Jet and I spent some time discussing her Harry/Louis dilemma; ultimately we decided that for now she just needed to work on getting to know them, because apparently they were both into her. I could tell she cared about both of them but in different ways... we just weren't sure which she held more "friendly" feelings towards.

"Are you nervous about their last concert?" Jetta asked absentmindedly as I shuffled through a few random magazines.

"I'm not nervous... actually, it's more like I'm dreading it," I said honestly. I was dreading it because that meant the boys were leaving for Tulsa the next morning. I almost felt my throat aching at the thought of him actually being gone. I cleared my throat as tried to remind myself that Niall promised to be there for me... he promised not to leave. Call me a fool in love, but I believed in him whole-heartedly.

As my thoughts drifted toward the darker corners of my mind, I suddenly felt cold as I realized I couldn't go back home tomorrow, "Jet, is it going to be okay if I stay with you for awhile?" I asked worriedly, almost terrified that I was going to be sent back home.

Jetta got up from the chair she was lounging on and hurried over to plop down my lap; I grunted at the unexpected weight. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder and looked at me seriously, "Channing, if you even try to go back home to live with that son of a bitch... I will punch you in the ovaries," she said, surprisingly keeping a straight face, when all I wanted to do was start laughing.

I giggled as I saw her smirk and shrugged my shoulders, "Well... lucky me... on account of I don't even have ovaries anymore, considering One Direction destroyed them long ago..." I trailed off, looking out into the distance dramatically.

We were about to start laughing, however, we heard loud snickering coming from the door, which I could now see was propped open and five mischievous boys were trying to spy on us.

"Actually..." I heard Louis' smooth voice call out, "I'm pretty sure it was Nialler that destroyed your ovaries, I will accept no responsibility for that..." he teased as he sent me a wink.

I rolled my eyes as I felt my face heat up, "You're so dumb..." I mumbled as everyone piled into the room. Of course I saw Niall wander over toward the snack table, he glanced up with an incredulous look on his face, "Aye, who ate ev'rythin'?" he asked, giving me an accusing glare.

I shrugged my shoulders and pointed over to Jetta as she rubbed her stomach, not the least bit bashful, "Yep... Channing and I are now carrying food babies," she announced.

Niall shook his head as he tried to sift through the remains of the sandwiches that used to be displayed nicely on the platter... that is until Jetta and I got a hold of them.

"Are you buttheads almost finished answering boring questions that everyone already knows the answers to?" Jetta whined.

Niall laughed as he shook his head and walked over to Jetta, he subtly handed her something and whispered in her ear. I gave them a curious look and they both turned, grinning at me like weirdos. Niall came over to me, kissing me on the cheek, "See yeh in a bit, babe," he whispered against my lips before giving me a soft peck. As the boys left the room, heading back to finish the interview, Jetta skipped toward me, locking her arm around mine, "Come on, let's go shopping!" she squealed, dragging me out of the room.

***

One of the body guards drove us to the mall that was just a few streets over, Jetta was bursting at the seams as we pulled into a parking spot. The guard, Randy, agreed to wait for us and we had his phone number in case we would need him for any reason. Sometimes it still felt surreal to think that I might need a body guard at times; to be honest, it actually freaked me out a little. I didn't know how the boys managed to keep their sanity.

We slipped into the entrance that lead to the food court; after grabbing a few pretzels to snack on we made our way through the masses, easily blending into the crowd. I really didn't like it when people would recognize me, so being invisible was more than fine with me. I awkwardly shuffled my feet as Jetta spotted somewhere that she wanted to go, so I was once again being dragged behind her.

She finally came to stand in front of the T-Mobil cell phone stand that was placed in the mall. I rose my eyebrow at her, unsure as to what we were doing here. She gave me a silly grin as the salesman approached us with a friendly smile, "What can I do for you ladies today?" he asked kindly. He was probably in his forties so I was thankful for that, I couldn't stand when young guys would try to get you to buy things by attempting flattery.

Jetta winked at me as she turned toward the man who had the name 'Christofer' on his nametag, "Um... can I add a phone line to my plan?" she asked sweetly, laying on the charm she always seemed to do when dealing with strangers.

"Sure thing, what's your phone number?" he asked, turning toward the computer to pull up her account.

"636-555-5555," she recited as she continued to ignore my curious glare. Why was she adding a new line to her plan?

"Alright, were you planning on purchasing a new phone?" he asked, looking hopeful. I couldn't blame him, since I'm sure he got paid on commission.

Jet nodded her head as she turned toward me, "Chan... do you see anything you like?" she asked me, trying to hold in her smirk.

"What?" I asked, softly as I turned toward the display phones, immediately spotting a white Blackberry that I thought was rather cute.

I was about to touch it, however, I pulled my hand back, still looking at Jetta, expecting her to give me answers, "You're not buying me a phone..." I insisted, my eyes still drifting toward the white blackberry.

"Pfft... I'm not buying you diddly-squat... Niall asked me to put you on my plan," she said with a smirk, raising her eyebrows up and down as she continued, "He gave me his card and told me to get you to pick out a phone and to just shut up about it... he said he's not leaving without having a direct link to you," she teased, pinching my cheek as she noticed by blush.

I couldn't stop my mouth as it began to pull up at the corners, revealing what I'm assuming was a pretty obnoxious smile, "What?" I repeated, at a loss for words. I reached for the Blackberry, clicking around on it as I tried to process what Jetta had just revealed.

"Girl, I know you heard me. Now shut up and just pick out a phone... Nilly Willy loves you forever and ever and wants you to have a phone so you can sext him regularly and send him nakey pics," she said loudly, breaking out into a fit of giggles.

I shot my eyes wide open, being as we were still in the presence of this middle aged man, "Jetta!" I whined as I pushed her away, but she just kept laughing at my expression. I glanced at Christofer and he looked just as uncomfortable. I'm right there with ya buddy.

After my embarrassment died down, my smile returned as I reached for the Blackberry I knew I already had my heart set on, "Can I get this one?" I asked shyly as the man cleared his throat. He nodded before reaching under the counter looking for the phone.

After finding it, Christofer began explaining to me the features and after a bit I was starting to get the hang of it. I mean, I wasn't completely cell phone retarded... but still, I'd never had one of my own, so I never used them besides texting on Jetta's occasionally.

I clicked around on my phone and was signing into my social networking sites like Jetta instructed, when a new thought surfaced, "Hey Jet? How am I supposed to pay a monthly bill?" I asked worriedly.

She rolled her eyes as she was handing the man a black credit card, I smiled as I saw Niall's name etched in the golden letters, "He's paying for the phone service 6 months in advance," she said, offering me another wink.

I instantly felt the weight fall off my shoulders... I couldn't believe him... that boy was so good to me. I immediately got Niall's number from Jetta and sent him a text,

_Olive: You'll never guess what Jetta just bought me! I can't believe she was saving for the past three months to get me a phone <3>_

I sent the text, giggling as I waited for the reply, luckily I didn't have to wait long;

_Nilla: Seriously! Jetta said she bought that! The girl is impossible. x_

I laughed out loud as I showed Jetta his reply, rolling her eyes she went back to her phone, apparently she was checking in with her mother, letting her know we'd be back home tomorrow.

_Olive: What's wrong? Are you Angrrryyyyyy! Aagggghhh! Like a dodgy pipe?_

_Nilla: Hahahaha As a matter of fact, yes I am. x_

_Olive: I was teasing silly... I know you got it for me... thank you. Why are you so good to me?_

_Nilla: Someone has to be <3>_

I smiled at his last reply, and was about to text back, but was distracted as Jetta whisked me away so we could find outfits for the concert; I was pumped to head to my third One Direction concert... I was seriously living every direcioner's dream... and there was no way I was going to take that for granted.

 o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** _[Half way through the concert]_ o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I was somewhat nervous as the show went on and it was almost the time that we would each take turns covering our chosen songs; everyone had a song that they usually went with, but today, I was going to be doing a different song, one that no one had heard yet. I'd only had a few days to work on it, so it was still a bit rough, however, I really just wanted to sing it since this was our last show, so everyone could hear it... especially Channing.

As we finished up the end of "Irresistible", the lads and I gathered in the middle of the stage. Channing and Jetta were again located in the audience, with plenty of body guards near them. I felt a lump forming in my throat as I tried to shake the nerves off. Zayn noticed my nervous state and wrapped his arm around my shoulder in a comforting gesture, "You'll do great, mate," he whispered, as I looked down near the front row to see Channing and Jetta laughing and smiling up at us.

I nodded my head at him and smiled as a crew member handed me my guitar, we sat around in a half circle, kicking off our covers session with Zayn singing, "Payphone", followed by Louis' version of "Valerie." Finally after Liam and Harry sang our classic rendition of "Torn," I really left the nerves take over. My throat was extremely dry, but as I took one last look at each of the lads, they all nodded, offering me reassuring smiles.

I got to my feet and walked to center stage, smiling as the fans began screaming loudly, probably expecting me to begin singing, "Stereo Hearts," however, that wasn't what I was about to sing tonight. My eyes searched the crowd, spotting Channing instantly; the look in her eyes just did something to me. I couldn't help but smile and look away; I always knew I'd end up with a directioner, and every time I looked out into the crowd  to see her cheering us on, it reminded me just how much I not only loved her... but just our fans in general.

I cleared my throat as the screaming began to dissipate and readjusted the strap of my guitar, as well as the mic that was attached to it, "How's ev'ryone doin' tahnight?" I asked the excited crowd, smiling hugely as I heard an elegant chorus of screams thrown back into my face.

Shaking my head lightly in amusement, I paced slowly back and forth across the stage as I spoke to the crowd, "As sum of yeh may know... I met someone new since we've been in St. Louis," I said slowly, finding Channing's eyes and winking at her. The buzz of the crowd got louder as I hinted toward a certain someone and I couldn't keep the stupid grin off of my face. I puffed out my cheeks and tried to bite my lip in an attempt to hide my embarrassment, but I could definitely feel my cheeks growing hot.

She looked startled as I gazed into her widening eyes, "Well... I jus' wanted tah think her... fer jus' bein' herself," I said somewhat softly as I looked back into the crowd, "...And, well... I've written her a song... an' I was jus' wonderin' if you lot would wanta hear it?" I asked hopefully, as I shrugged my shoulders slightly. My heart was beating a million miles a minute as I peered out into the overzealous crowd, dreading their rejection.

The response I got was immediate, the screaming louder than it had been all night. I looked over my shoulder so that Josh would start up the drums; I also nodded at Jake, he was a newer guy on our crew who was wicked with the harmonica. The two of them had helped me with the music to go along with the lyrics. I grinned as I placed my fingers on the chords of my guitar and began strumming to the somewhat upbeat song I'd written for Channing over the last three days;

_"Last night was a thriller, was a killer, was a damn good time._ _I met a pretty girl and I wanted to make her mine._ _So I took her for a walk and damn, that girl could talk._ _But talked about all the pretty things and all the shitty things_ _and all the little things that fall between._  
 _And oh, pretty girl,_ _I know that I just met you,_ _But I might just dare to say_ _That I love you."_

The arena was rather quiet, although there were a few screams here and there, for the most part, everyone just looked to be straining their ears to hear my lyrics as they tumbled out of my mouth. I was still pacing the stage somewhat, attempting to distribute my attention to everyone, trying to make my voice strong as it echoed throughout the hollow space;  
 _"And oh, sweet perfection,_ _Won't you hear my one confession?_ _I've been lost, but dear, I'm found._  
 _I've been lookin' for a girl just like you:_ _You got words to say, but no point to prove._ _You got me and that's enough for you,_ _And girl, I got you._  
 _I've been lookin' for a heart that's so complete,_ _So satisfied with the little things._ _I got you and that's enough for me,_ _So girl, can't ya see_ _That you and me_ _Could be so free_ _And live happy?_ _So take my hand and let's run."_

I stopped pacing the stage, feeling the words flowing through me freely as I met Channing's gaze. She looked up at me, I couldn't even understand the emotion I could see clouding her grey eyes, just looking at me as if she were awestruck; I smiled down at her, serenading her as I finished the song;   
 _"And oh, pretty girl,_ _I know that I just met you,_ _But I might just dare to say_ _That I love you._  
 _And oh, sweet perfection,_ _Won't you hear my one confession?_ _I've been lost, but dear, I'm found._ _But Dear, I'm found."_

As I finished the song, I still had my eyes locked with Channing, both of us jumping a little as the applause blasted through the arena, shattering our intimate moment. As we both began laughing, I caught her eye once more; she blew me a kiss and I winked, pretending to catch it. I turned around to smile at the boys, all of them returning my excitement, grinning at me proudly.

As the lads surrounded me in a group hug, I looked out again at the crowd. I skimmed over all of the faces, seriously thankful for every single one of them, but as I found those grey eyes once more, I felt my heartbeat pick up as the memories we'd shared over only the past few days flooded my mind.

It was the strangest feeling when I would look at her... just saying that I loved her didn't seem like enough. Those three little words didn't feel competent in expressing my feelings. I'd never felt like more of a cheesy romantic in my life, but I wasn't ashamed of how strongly I felt for her, despite what anyone else had to say about it. Every time I looked at her, I felt like my heart was breaking, but it was breaking in the right way. It felt like it was splitting in two so that I could easily trade a piece of mine for hers... and it was a feeling I would do anything to keep.


	27. Dear Channing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall writes a goodbye letter for Channing... it's so sweet you'll get cavities tbh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter of **AKOTW** but never fear, because now you just need to go to my profile to find the next book in the trilogy... _A Kiss on the Cheek_

**Chapter 27: Dear Channing**

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Liam's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The rest of the lads and I couldn't help the huge grins that covered our faces as Nialler sang his heart out to Channing in front of everyone. Although they had never made an official statement to the press, I really didn't think it was necessary. Anyone could tell that he was completely smitten with her, and her with him.

As Niall finished his song, I watched him as he winked at Channing and she blew him a kiss. He turned around to smile at us, but we were already rushing over toward him to have one of our well known group hugs. After we took turns patting him on the head, he turned back toward the crowd, a blush still apparent on his rosy cheeks, "Um... I call tha' song 'Sweet Perfection,' and I wrote it fer Channing..." he trailed off, looking bashful as the crowd exploded with clapping, screaming, crying, and laughing.

I held my mic up to my lips, "Wasn't that amazing everyone? Let's hear it one more time for Niall!" I yelled out, riling up the crowd even more. I smiled over at Niall as we basked in the deafening screams.

***

 After another hour and a half, we'd finally finished our set and were piling into our dressing room, chugging down bottles of water. It was safe to say that we were all quite sweaty and uncomfortable, but you could feel the relief that radiated through each of us after finishing another great show.

We stood around, chatting and giving out a bit of banter when the dressing room door flew open, revealing an adorably crazed looking Channing as she ran into the room and jumped into Niall's arms.

We began laughing as they tumbled to the ground due to the fact that Channing had completely jumped him. Neither of them seemed to notice though as Niall hit the ground and Chan straddled him as she hovered over his body, smiling down at him.

"Did you like it?" Niall asked, returning her excited smile.

"Did I like it? Are you serious?" she asked with wide eyes. Without missing a beat, we watched on as Channing pressed her lips against his, kissing him fully, not at all worried about her current audience in the room.

Niall's eyes were closed as he ran his fingers through her hair, pushing it back so that it was out of her face; their lips remained locked as their kiss grew more heated. I'd finally had enough of feeling like a peeping tom so I turned back toward the door to see an amused looking Jetta leaning on the doorframe. She grinned down at them for another moment before feeling my gaze on her and looking up to meet my eyes.

She walked over slowly, wrapping her arms around my neck, "Great show tonight, you guys did amazing," she said in complete sincerity. I grinned down at her, before tousling her hair and wrapping my arm around her shoulder; I saw her making eyes at Louis from across the room, and he was sure enough returning the look. I looked back and forth between the two of them, raising my eyebrow slightly as Harry cleared his throat from over on the couch where he was sprawled out.

He motioned for Jetta to come closer, causing Louis to drop his gaze; he looked away and made his way over toward the refreshment table. I chuckled as he awkwardly stepped over Chan and Niall who were still laying on the floor making out, becoming quite PG-13 about the situation. I nudged Niall with my foot, "You guys wanta get a room, yeah?" I teased, smirking down at them.

I laughed again as he waved his hand at me shooing me away, but nonetheless, he scooped Channing up and carried her over toward the other side of the room, away from everyone else. I rolled my eyes as they sat down on an armchair... shamelessly continuing on with their public displays of affection.

I was watching on as Harry and Jetta laughed about something he was showing her on his phone, and even started smiling as he poked her in the ribs. They looked like they had become such good friends, in fact all of us had. I was a little saddened to think this was the last night that we'd be spending with the girls. Things would be weird once we left tomorrow... it's odd how these girls just came into our lives about ten days ago, and they already felt like part of the One Direction family.

I was drawn from my thoughts as I felt a buzzing in my pocket, as I peered down at the small screen, I smiled as I saw who it was, Natalie, the girl I met yesterday. I'd only just met her, but she seemed incredibly sweet and genuine. Apparently, Jet and Channing were friends with her from school, and they'd given me the green light, saying she was a good girl to get to know.

I opened the text, rolling my eyes at the name she'd put herself under in my phone, she informed me that it would be our 'ship' name, apparently she was a rather enthusiastic directioner. I admit, maybe it was slightly creepy... but the way she embraced her creepiness was actually quite endearing;

_Nataliam: Hey Li, how was the show? I would have sooo been there if I could have gotten off work :(_

_Leeyum: It was sick, I'm still buzzin.. how r u? Maybe you can come to another show someday! no sad faces =)_

_Nataliam: not so good tbh, I just made a grilled cheese sandwhich... but my dog ate it when I wasn't looking... so now i'm sad.. and hungry_

I smirked at her response, she was quite adorable;

_Leeyum: what's your Twitter?_

_Nataliam: natsjax121_

_Leeyum: Don't worry, I got you covered_

I sent the text and smiled as as I googled the pic I was looking for; after finding it, I opened Twitter.

**@Real_Liam_Payne @natsjax121 here love, I made this just 4u. make sure your dog doesn't get a hold of it this time :)**

I attached a picture of a delicious looking grilled cheese sandwich that I'd quickly looked up on google, before sending out the tweet with a smirk.

Of course, the response was immediate; many fans asking me to "make them" various foods. After following a few fans, as well as Natalie, I went to my texts after feeling my phone buzz;

_Nataliam: that was the most delicious grilled cheese my tastebuds have ever had the pleasure to experience. thank u kind sir._

I checked Twitter again and laughed out loud whenever I noticed two of the trends;

**#ChiallerFeelsOMGWhatIsAir**

**#LiamYUNoMakeMeGrilledCheeseSamich**

I was still laughing, drawing the attention of the others, "What's funny, mate?" Louis asked as he made his way toward me.

I shared the trends with them and we had a good laugh before making our way back out to the van. I had to literally pinch Niall on the arm so that he'd get his arse moving.

Once in the van, I kept texting Natalie on the ride home, and even Danielle a few times. Recently she and I had been talking... nothing serious, but talking nonetheless. Occasionally, I'd peek out from my phone's screen and check out what was going on around me. I frowned when I took a look at the couple in the back row. Iit was quite a sad sight; although most of us were joking and having a laugh together, I noticed Channing was on Niall's lap, straddling him and they were embracing one another tightly.

They weren't talking... just holding each other and I could hear Chan sniffling, occasionally. It was really going to hit the two of them hard when we had to leave, I really was feeling for them. I was worried about them both, but mostly, I was worried about Channing. Niall had all of us to keep his spirits up, but there's no telling what could happen to Channing while we're away.

I turned away from the couple, trying not to intrude on their last remaining time together.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Harry's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jetta was sitting next to me on the ride back to the hotel, and I subtly took her hand in mine, entwining our fingers. she looked up at me, her big blue eyes giving me a questioning gaze. I just winked and leaned over, laying my head on her lap. I knew she didn't want anything serious... she'd informed me of that this afternoon, but still... that didn't mean I couldn't hold her hand, right?

Rather than push me away, she started caressing her fingers though my hair... the sensations her soft fingertips left behind were almost making me sleepy.

I turned my body so that I was facing her, and I slowly pushed my face against her, nuzzling my nose into her stomach.

Jet glanced down at me, a small smirk threatening to break across her lips; after staring at me for a moment, she bit her bottom lip before looking away once again, continuing her conversation with Louis. Even if we couldn't be exclusive, I'd like to get to know her better, and I think she understood that. As I subtly listened to Lou and Jetta's conversation, I could feel myself drifting in and out of alertness;

"So what are you two planning to do when we leave?" Louis asked quietly, I could feel him slightly fidgeting in his seat, considering he was nervously bouncing his leg against my head. Whether this was on purpose or accident, I wasn't sure.

"Well... what else can we do? We're just going back to my house. Don't worry, I'd never let her go back home," Jetta replied, still stroking her fingers gently through my hair. I began tracing abstract shapes with my own fingertips along her thigh. She stiffened for a moment, but quickly relaxed and let me continue.

"Does her stepfather know where you live, though?" Louis asked, worry evident in his voice.

"Well... yeah... I mean he's been to my house before, but it was almost two years ago. I doubt he even remembers where it's at," she said with conviction.

"You two need to keep in contact with us, we may be leaving to finish the tour, but afterwards we're off for eight weeks. Maybe you could come stay with us," Louis suggested, clearning his throat slightly afterwards.

"Are you serious?" Jetta asked incredulously, to my dismay, she stopped rubbing her hands against my scalp as she waited for his reply.

"Of course, if you'd want to. I don't know when we'd be able to come back to the states. I'm not sure what Niall's planning to do, but I know there is no way he's going to last that long without Channing," Louis said somewhat sadly, "I feel bad. He's just found her and now he's got to leave again," he continued softly.

"Well... what would we do about school?" Jetta wondered out loud to herself.

Louis chuckled, "Jet... I'm not sure if you're aware of this... but there is such a thing as 'school' in England," he teased in a mocking voice.

I felt the motion as Jetta slapped his shoulder playfully, "Don't be an ass," she mumbled, sounding far away.

Eventually, Jet continued on with the head massage and I drifted off, no longer able to hear anything they were talking about.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Jetta's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I could tell when Harry had finally fallen asleep in my lap because he'd stopped tracing his fingers along my thigh. I still kept my hands in his hair though, I think it helped him fall asleep in the first place.

I looked down at him and his face looked peaceful, making me smile. I felt my heart drop at the thought of them leaving... he'd helped me sleep for almost the past two weeks, what the hell was I going to do when he left?

I could hear Louis subtly humming to himself, I'd given him my iPod to play around on and he was apparently checking out my music. I caually looked over at him, "Louis, I'm going to really miss you," I said rather randomly.

He immediately stopped humming as he looked up, meeting my eyes, "I'm going to miss ya too, Jet," he smiled as he slung his arm over my shoulder, hugging me tightly against him.

"Let's make the most of tonight, yeah?" he asked, sounding hopeful. I looked at him intensley, not sure if he had a double meaning hidden in that sentence. Before I could ponder it any further, the van stopped moving and everyone began emptying out of it.

Harry was still asleep in my lap, so I gently began to shake him, "P.K.P... come on... rise and shine!" I exclaimed, tugging a little harder on his curls than was necessary. His eyes shot open and narrowed at me before he glanced around, taking in his surroundings. He sluggishly crawled out of my lap and we made our way toward the back entrance of the hotel.

It felt a little surreal... knowing that this was going to be our last night with the boys. I was actually quite sad about it; we made our way toward the elevator and I was walking with Louis to my left while Harry was walking behind us. Zayn and Liam were probably already up in the room with Niall and Channing.

The elevator ride to the 13th floor was awkward to say the least; I could feel enough tension in the tiny space to choke an elephant. I subtly noticed Harry and Louis kept eyeing each other up, so after a few seconds of the awkwardness, I looked over my shoulder, "Hey did you guys want to be alone or something?" I asked the two of them.

They looked at each other than back at me with a dumbfounded expression, causing me to start laughing. As I turned back around because the door was about to open, Louis wrapped his arms around me and pulled me back away from the door. I was about to protest but then I realized that Harry was pressing the button for the door to close.

"Harry, I think I need your assistance with something..." Louis trailed off, giving me an evil smirk. I glared over my shoulder at him as he yelled out for Harry to hit the Lobby floor button. I was no longer resisting, yet Louis still had his arms wrapped around my waist, holding me against him... not that I was complaining.

It was already after 11pm so the hotel was rather empty; Louis lead me from the elevator, "Where are we going?" I asked suspiciously. However, I immediately stopped in my tracks whenever I noticed that Lou was leading me toward the pool. Awe fuck no.

Without further explanation, I quickly tried to wriggle out of Louis' grip, and I almost got away, in fact I DID get away... until I crashed into a wall of solid muscle, almost falling on my ass, "Damnit Harry!" I yelled as Louis captured me again, wrapping his arms around my torso, "Haz, grab her feet!" Louis instructed with a twinkle in his eye.

My eyes widened as I realized exactly what he was doing, and EXACLTY why he requested Harry's help. Without questioning him further, Harry grabbed a hold of my ankles, gripping them tightly so I couldn't kick him away.

They approached the pool slowly, smirking at the fact that the life guard was no longer on duty, "LEWIS... I AM NOT KIDDING. PUT ME DOWN, NOW!" I demanded, my shrill voice echoing off the walls and sailing over the smooth chlorine poisoned waters.

"Well, alright... if you insist!" Louis called out casually, causing Harry to start laughing like a little girl.

Although I tried to fight them off, I knew there was nothing I could do, so I just resorted to screaming vulgar obscenities at them as they swung me three times before tossing me into the calm water. As I plummeted to the bottom, I could already hear their loud but muffled laughter above my head. I immediately pushed my feet off the bottom, shooting myself to the top. I was obviously going to beat the shit out of them... just watch me.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Harry's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Louis and I were in hysterics as we tossed Jetta into the pool fully clothed; she never had a chance. It felt good to laugh with them... this was the first time we seemed to be getting along in the past week. After only a few seconds of Jet being submerged, we watched in horror as she immediately resurfaced; staring at us with an insane look in her eye.

We were still standing near the edge of the pool, and I looked over my shoulder to see that Louis had already taken many steps away, backing up to the door. I glanced at his face and he met my eyes with a worried look, "RUN!" he shouted as he spun on his heel and sprinted out of the muggy pool area.

I glanced over my shoulder for just a second to see Jetta hoisting herself up and out of the edge of the pool with ease. She was dripping and her clothes were sticking to her skin quite nicely. I didn't even get much of a chance to admire her white, now see-through shirt before I was forced to run... for my own safety and the safety of my future children.

"I'm going to kill you," Jet said quite calmly before springing into action and chasing after me. She was sure a quick one, although Louis got a head start, I was quickly catching up to him, and Jetta was hot on our trail.

"Holy shit, she's fast!" I exclaimed through my labored breathing as we turned a corner, heading for the stairwell. There was no time for the elevator, so we dashed toward the heavy door, quickly flinging it open and hastily making our way up the concrete steps.

"You can run but you can't hide," she yelled out cryptically as she tried to snatch the back of my hoodie, she got a hold of it but I shot forward with a burst of adrenaline and was almost in front of Louis now. Let me just say, running up 13 flights of stairs after a three hours concert... is the worst thing I've ever experienced. Both Louis and I were gasping for breath as we finally made it to our floor and threw ourselves into the hallway.

I turned to look at Jet who didn't seem to be even breaking a sweat, "How are you not tired?" I complained in exasperation as we reluctantly began slowing down... since we had to open the door to the room, after all.

"Cross-country and swim team, baby!" she said with a smile as she jumped onto my back, immediately making me fall to the ground. Louis was banging frantically on the door, while I was being unmercifully pummeled by Jetta's not so gentle fists. She was also pinching me on my arms and along my waist, "OW!" I whined as Liam finally opened the door, giving the three of us a startled look.

Louis was just standing there, totally unscathed from Jetta's wrath, while I was still being tortured by the angry Chihuahua. After a moment of staring at us, Liam finally leapt forward, grabbing ahold of Jet and pulling her from on top of me. He wrapped his arms around her, keeping them trapped so she couldn't smack him. I began laughing as I saw her angry face as Liam threw her over his shoulder and carried her away.

Louis leaned over, offering an outstretched hand to help me up, "Thanks for taking one for the team, mate," he said with a chuckle. I scowled and rubbed my arms where she'd been punching me like a damn crawdad . After a moment though I smiled back at him, relieved that the tension seemed to be broken between us, at least for the time being. Maybe the three of us could just be friends... maybe that's all that we were meant to be.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Zayn's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As we all crowded into the living room, I had been instructed to keep a hold of Jetta, since she was apparently on a rampage, attempting to murder both Harry and Louis. I could only image what they did to piss her off... oh right I don't have to imagine because she was currently sitting her soaking wet arse on my lap, getting my clothes all wet as I wrapped my arms around her trying to calm her down.

"Shhh... they'll get what's coming to them, no worries," I whispered, in hopes of taming the wild beast. Reluctantly, she stopped fighting my hold and everyone kind of looked over at us.

"Um, I'm kind of freezing, can you let me go so I can get changed?" she asked, sounding oddly calm.

I looked over a Liam and he shrugged his shoulders before nodding his head. Jetta was still keeping her things in Liam's room, and as she walked past Harry, I laughed when he tensed up as she passed.

"God, that girl is scary when she's mad," he commented as she slammed the door shut.

"Well, why did you throw her in the pool? Idiots..." Channing trailed off, shaking her head.

"Hey... it was all in good fun!" Louis reasoned, crossing his arms over his chest and plopping down on the seat next to me.

"Fun for you maybe..." I laughed as I pointed down at my pants, "Not really fun for anyone else though," I continued, giving them both a hard stare.

"I'd jus' be werried about her retaliation... I can imagine tha' she's one who seeks revenge," Niall teased, giving Harry a wink from across the room. I glanced over to see that he was sitting on the couch, Channing laying across him with her head in his lap.

"What are you two going to do when you can't be touching every second of the day?" Louis asked before I could find the words, because I was honestly curious as well.

He looked down and smiled as she looked up to meet his eyes, "We'll figure somethin' out, right?" he asked, flicking her lightly on the nose. She smiled before wrapping her hand around his, entwining their fingers. I watched as Niall soothingly brushed his thumb across her knuckle.

"That reminds me... " Louis stated, waiting for everyone to look over at him, "I was talking with Jetta and was asking her what her plans were. So you two are going back to her house?" he asked, directing his question at Channing.

Chan looked around for a second before answering, "Yes, I'm going to stay with her... I'm not going back home," she confirmed. I'll admit, that gave me a bit of relief knowing that she wasn't going to be subjected to her stepfather's cruelty when we were gone. 

"But... Jet says that Jeff knows were she lives?" Louis asked, sounding unsure. That actually was quite a dilemma. If he knew where to find her, it probably wouldn't be as safe as I originally thought. I watched Niall's reaction and he tensed up for a moment as Channing answered, "Yeah... he.... uh, he knows... but the last time he was there was almost two years ago. I'm sure he's forgotten by now," she insisted, trying to make us feel better, Niall especially.

"I don't like this," he mumbled, looking down to meet her eyes once more. Channing sat up so that she was facing him, "I'll be careful, okay? I promise," she said, trying to give a reassuring smile.

"Well, Jet and I were talking in the van... and what do you guys say about having them come stay with us for a little while? After the tour ends of course... we'll have almost two months off," Louis suggested. Liam and Harry immediately smiled, agreeing that they'd love to have them stay.

Niall looked at Channing with an ecstatic expression on his face; I knew he's been stressing over when he was going to get to see her again. I didn't mind the girls being around, not at all. They were fun and down to earth.

"I have one condition though," Liam stated, looking between Harry and Louis, "You two need to stop fighting like children, she's not a toy. You both need to cut off your romantic feelings for her... especially if you're not serious. I've had a few heart to hearts with her," he said, looking directly at Louis, "... And she's not as indestructible as she appears. So no more of this Larry drama... capiche?" Liam asked, looking between the two of them.

There was a moment of silence before they both burst out in laughter, "Did you just say 'capiche'?" Louis asked, as he tried to catch his breath. Everyone let out a few laughs at Liam's mobster terminology, and as soon as Jetta reentered the room, we took a seat around the telly, deciding to watch a film. I spent most of it though texting Perrie;

_PerBear: What r u doing sweetie? x_

_ZayneyPoo: Watching some film called "Mama"... it's actually scary as hell so im tryin not to pay attention ha x_

_PerBear: aww poor baby, hey we're almost finished recording and I might be able to come out to one of your concerts at the next city, where r u goin again? x_

_ZayneyPoo: We'll be in Tulsa, OK and really?! Per that'd be amazing if u could come babe x_

I looked at the time on my phone and realized that it was barely 6am back at home, what on earth was she doing up so already?

_PerBear: Well, I'll let u know for sure, I've got to get ready for an interview tho, i'll talk to u soon love you xx_

_ZayneyPoo: I was wondering why u were up so early... im going to go to bed soon anyways... goodnight babe, or I guess in your case good morning! :) love u too xx_

I was about to head off to my room whenever I noticed Jetta and Louis sneaking out of the front door, and running across the hall to his room. When I looked back toward the couch I noticed that Liam and Harry had fallen asleep. Channing and Niall were still whispering to each other though as they watched the movie. I looked at the now closed front door one more time and shook my head... Liam's gotta be on drugs if he thinks that they're going to behave... because I'm assuming they didn't just run out of here to go play scrabble.

I continued back to my own room, thankful for the fact that I had Perrie back at home to keep me sane.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Niall's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Channing had started to fall asleep on my shoulder just as Mama ended, so I carefully picked her up and made my way back toward our room. I was suddenly a little sad at the thought that after tonight, this would no longer be "our room."

She startled as I lay her on the pillow, her eyes shooting open to meet mine, "Shh, shh... you're tired, go to sleep, baby," I tried to soothe her, but her stubborn eyes remained opened and focused on me.

"No... I don't want to go to sleep, this is our last night... I want to spend it with you," she whispered sleepily, but I could tell she was becoming more alert. I moved some of her hair from her face and placed a kiss on her cheek before laying next to her and wrapping my arms around her waist.

I suddenly got my phone out and held it up over us, snapping a picture as we looked at each other, she turned her head when she saw the flash, "Aw, I wasn't ready," she pouted, looking back at me.

I smiled, "That's ok, let's take more," I whispered as she faced the camera and I pressed my lips to her cheek once again for a picture.

After taking maybe ten different shots, including smiling, funny faces and kissing pictures, I let her look thru them all, to pick out her favorite. After taking some time to look them over carefully she decided on the one of her kissing my cheek while I looked at the camera.

"Why do yeh like tha' one most? Yeh can barely see yer face," I commented, as she sent it to her own phone.

"Cus look at your eyes Niall... they're so damn pretty and blue because there's not a shadow over them like the other pictures," she explained as she smiled down at the picture.

I looked at her, "How about we leave it up to the fans?" I asked, giving her a wink. She shrugged her shoulders and watched as I tweeted three of my favorite pictures, as well as hers;

**@OfficialNiall guys, can you help me choose my new twitter icon? channing and I can't seem to come to an agreement! :) x #chiallerprobs**

I uploaded the picture Channing liked, as well as the one of us smiling at the camera, the one of us kissing, and the one of us making a funny face. After waiting about ten minutes, we took a peek at the tweets to see that I'd gotten plenty of replies, "God... I'll never get over how many times you get retweeted... 45k retweets... Jesus Christ," she rambled off adorably.

After looking through my mentions, we came to the conclusion that most of the fans liked the one of us smiling at the camera as well as the one she chose as her favorite. She rose her eyebrow up at me, "Told ya...." she teased, but I ignored her as I decided on the twitter icon myself, the one of us kissing.

I put my phone away as I suddenly pounced on top of her, kissing her lips enthusiastically, and I smiled as she wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me closer, "We can make this last Channing, if you can wait for me... we can get through this," I whispered against her lips, watching her eyes as they softened, and she pulled me into a gentle kiss.

"Niall, I'll always be waiting," she replied, as we relaxed back onto the bed, tangled up in each other's arms. We tried to stay awake, we did for a little while, talking about everything we could think of... but eventually, I watched as Channing began to drift off. I kissed her cheek gently and got up carefully from the bed... there was one more thing I had to do before I left tomorrow. 

***

Although I was extremely exhausted from the previous night, I found myself wide awake as we hurried into the airport, making sure to avoid any hidden papparzi. Channing was gripping my hand tightly as we walked at a slow pace, lagging slowly behind everyone. There was one body guard behind us that kept muttering for us to speed it up, but we paid him no mind.

I felt like I was on a death march or something, call me dramatic, but this awful feeling of dread was just gripping my heart to a point where it was almost painful. Too many scenerios kept running through my mind: What if Channing decides to go back home? What is she decides to cut? What if no one is there to help her next time? What if Jeff finds her? What if Tate finds her? What if she finds someone else?

I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't even realize that she was calling my name until she bumped her shoulder against mine, causing me to look over at her, "Niall, this is going to be okay. We're going to be okay, right?" she asked, begging for my reassurance.

I immediately began nodding my head, "Of course, I'm probably gonna end up callin' yeh so much yer gonna get sick of meh," I joked, although in the back of my mind, I was being entirely serious.

A small smile slipped across her face as she ran her fingers through her long hair, releasing a sigh, "God this is so shitty," she groaned, laying her head against my shoudler as we contined toward the terminal.

I could see up ahead where everyone was sitting in the chairs, waiting for our plane to board. After what seemed like forever, we finally caught up to them. I noticed that Jetta was sitting next to Harry, and they seemed to be in a deep discussion, whereas, I hadn't seen her talk to Louis at all this morning... God only knows what happened last night... there's no telling when it came to those two.

Chan turned toward me and I could see her eyes brimming over with tears. Her breath hitched in her throat, and she looked up at me as I immediately crashed her body against mine, pulling her close, I wrapped my arms tightly around her and buried my face in her hair.

I could hear a few camera flashes, but honestly, I was beyond the point of caring at the moment. If people was to obsess over pictures of us saying goodbye, then so be it. I wasn't going to make this a short goodbye just to stay out of the camera's eye.

The soft murmuring of everyone standing around us eventually began fading out, and it was just me and Channing. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that, but I do know when we finally pulled away, I looked toward everyone else to see that they were standing by the door, getting ready to show the attendent their boarding passes. My heart dropped, irritated that our time was already almost out. Why couldn't my damn plane be delayed today?

I could feel that Channing was sniffling and trembling slightly as she continued to bury her face into my chest, cluthing my shirt in her fingertips tightly.

I know how much she hated crying in public, so I tried to calm her down before she had to pull away, "Shhhh.... Olive, it's okay. I'm going to see you again so soon. We'll be togther again before you know it," I whispered against her ear as I could feel my own voice growing thick. My vision grew somewhat blurry as my eyes began swimming with moisture. I closed my eyes quickly, trying to will the tears away. She didn't need to see that, it would only make it worse for her.

I subtly swiped the back of my hand across my eyes, trying to erase any evidence of the treacherous tears that were refusing to leave. I cleared my throat lightly, trying to get control of my emotions as I felt Channing pull away from my chest. She looked up at me, both of our eyes shining as I noticed her bottom lip trembling even more.

I took the opportunity to firmly press my lips against her, not giving a care to anything else that was going on in the world around us. I needed her to know how much this was going to affect me just as much as it was going to affect her.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o **Channing's P.O.V** o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Niall's voice sounded gravelly as he tried whispering sweet reassurances into my ear; I could hear the constant flash of cameras but paid them no attention. If they wanted pictures of a girl falling apart for their own entertainment, well then good for them. Sick fucking bastards.

When I finally got the strength to pull my face away from his chest, I looked up at Niall, peering intensely into his crystal blue eyes, which were also swimming in unshed tears. Although it was nice to know that he was going to miss me too, the sight of his eyes holding such sadness almost made me breakout into hysterics.

After clearing his throat again in attempts to fight off the thickness, he took my face in his hands and looked seriously at me, "Chan, I want yeh to have somethin' a mine. Yeh can keep it safe fer me until I come back fer yeh, alright?" he asked softly, still holding my face firmly in his hands.

I nodded, not trusting the vulnerability of my own voice; he reached into his pocket, pulling out two things. First he took a slight step back to wrap somthing around my neck. After he had it iin place, I looked down and almost gasped once I saw the his shamrock necklace. It's something he used to wear constantly, although not as much anymore, I still knew it meant a lot to him.

I picked it up with my fingertips, studying it carefully before laying it back against my collar bone so that it was resting right next to my locket. Niall looked down at it as it lay against my chest, wearing a proud smile before his eyes wandered back up my face to meet mine.

"Thank you," I said softly, hugging him once more, burying my face into his neck. We embraced for a few more moments before we heard the flight attendent making an announcement that sounded like "Last call for flight 386 to Tulsa."

I gulped loudly as Niall reached into his other pocket, pulling out something that sort of surprised me. He held it in front of me, my eyes studying it intently. After a moment of looking at it in astonishment, I finally glanced up to meet his eyes. He was smiling down at me, watching my reaction to what he was now trying to give me.

I slowly reached my hand up to take the little white envelope, "Y-you wrote me... a letter?" I asked, stumbling over my words slightly as I tried to comprehend his actions. I pulled on the envelope, watching as it slid easily from his fingertips, right into my hands. I traced my thumb across the "Dear Channing," that was written across the front in his adorable handwriting.

I immediately felt my eyes growing misty once again as I slowly looked up to meet his. He gently placed his hand against my cheek, swiping away the few tears that were trickling from the corner of my eye. He leaned in close, his fingers still caressing my cheek, "Shh... baby, don' cry... I jus' wanted tah give yeh somethings tah remember me by," he whispered softly, bringing my wrist up to his lips just as he did that first time we met. He kissed my scars gently, his eyes never leaving mine as he peppered gentle kisses along both of my wrists. After he pulled his lips away from my wrists, he took both of my hands in his, holding them tightly within his own.

"I love you," he whispered as I heard the flight attendent announcing it was the last call for his flight once more, "I'll call you as soon as we land," he added on, pulling me against him for one more hug as one of his body guards grabbed him by his elbow, motioning for him to get to the plane.

He released my hand and began walking with the guard, occasionally looking over his shoulder to smile at me. Right before he got to the door to enter the plance, he ducked from under the guards arm, rushing back over toward me. He completely ignored them as they yelled after him; he came back to stand in front of me. Without a moment of hesitation, he swiped the snapback that was on his head and placed it onto mine, "Hold on to this for me too, babe," he said with a wink.

He hugged me tightly and kissed my lips one last time before letting the guard drag him away once more; I looked on sadly as he walked into the tunnel that conects to the plane, he looked back at me one last time, waving at me as they shut the door, immediately hiding him from view.

As I stood there alone, I looked down at my hands to see that I was squeezing my fists, crumbling Niall's letter in the process. I immediately relaxed my hands, flattening the envelope as I walked over to one of the seats by the window. I sat down, so that I was facing away from the paprazzi that were still snapping photos. I looked out at the plane that I knew had Niall safely within it.

I held the letter to my chest as I watched the plane begin rolling slowly toward the runway. I'd never been on a plane, so they always made me nervous when I'd watch them take off. I felt the presense of a new body as Jet sat in the seat next to me, swinging her arm over my shoulder. I hadn't realized it, but I had streams of tears running down my face as we watched the plane continue to roll further away from us.

I felt a buzz in my pocket, immediately checking my phone because it was a habit I had developed since having one. I smiled down at the screen as I read the message I'd just received;

_Nilla: Chan, we have to turn our phones off. But I just wanted to tell you again that I love you and I will see you soon, I PROMISE. Stay safe, and call me anytime you need me. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Ok, I have to go because this flight attendant is about to rip off my head... I love you_

I smiled down at my phone, still feeling the constant flow of tears as they left my eyes. As soon as the boys had gotten on the plane, the paparazzi had disappeared, thank God. So I was free to cry and look a straight up mess.

"It'll be okay, Channing," I heard Jetta whisper soothingly as she hugged me against her. I kept staring out the window, watching as the plane began rolling faster and faster. Eventually it picked up enough speed and the little wheels were pulled back up within the plane and I watched on in awe as the airplane took flight and immediately began to climb higher in altitude.

"Bye Nialler," I whispered out loud to myself, like a lunatic.

I kept watching as the plane grew smaller and smaller as it got farther away, and I even kept staring when the plane was obviously gone. Channing let me sit there for a while, eventually though, she began shaking my arm gently, trying to pry me up from the seat.

"C'mon, let's go home," she said softly, taking my hand in hers and leading me away. We made our way to the parking lot, where a cab was still waiting for us. After sliding inside, trying to get comfortable on the annoying leather seats, I realized I still had the envelope from Niall in my hands. I looked down at it in excitement, slowly trying to open it as to not mess it up.

After unfolding it, I flattened it out in my lap for a moment before taking a deep breath and reading Niall's letter;

_June 30th, 2013_

_Dear Channing,_

_Hello Olive :) I'm writing this letter now while you're sleeping next to me, and it's killing me as I watch you since I'm leaving tomorrow. I don't think you could even comprehend how much I'm going to miss you, Chan. You stormed in and pretty much became the main focus of my life... I find myself worrying most about how my decisions will affect you now. I've never really cared about another person as much as I care about you, and it does scare me... but please believe me when I say I'm not going anywhere._

_In this business, I need you to make sure you never believe anything you see in the tabloids or on gossip sites... please talk to me first. You wouldn't believe how many things I'm accused of doing because of rumors and photoshopped pictures, so please just always talk to me about anything you hear. You can't trust the media. ALSO, as I'm sure you know... our fans can be mean... so please, please, please never listen to the hurtful things they may say. You are absolutely beautiful and painfully perfect, so just remember that._

_While I'm sitting here, writing on the nightstand, you're sleeping soundly in the bed, all tangled up in the blankets... it's the cutest sight. Jetta once told me that you were a bed hog, and I'm going to have to agree with her; but I wouldn't have it any other way._

_I know we've joked before that I'm quite cheesy, and I'd just like to live up to that title :) So I've been thinking... it really is all about the little things when it comes to me and you; here are some "Little Things" of yours that I've noticed I absolutely adore about you:_  
 _\- the way you clean crumbs off my face with a napkin as if I'm a child :P_ _\- the way you bite your lip when you're lost in thought_ _\- when you're nervous you constantly run your fingers through your hair_ _\- every time we fall asleep you scratch my back, I don't know if you even realize it_ _\- the way you lose yourself in the music, and completely forget who's around (ahem, in the van... remember we'll have to try out that lap dance theory)_ _\- I don't mean to go all "Nobody Compares" on you... but honestly, you are so pretty when you cry... as well as when you don't_ _\- you do this thing where you tear the edge of the ketchup packet and dip one chip in at a time, it's quite cute_ _\- you try to protect everyone... even those who do not deserve it._ _\- you wear my clothes rather than your own every chance you get_ _\- you blush so easily_ _\- the way you constantly tell Zayn that "cigarette's will kill him some day"_ _\- you let me touch you... you've never turned me away... even with your past & I'm so happy you trust me enough to be that close to me_ _\- you brush your teeth like 4 times a day (fresh breath is always a plus)_ _\- the way you always thought so highly of me... even before you knew me... it makes me want to be a better man._  
 _Overall, you're honest, sincere, and true. You're my love and you're my best friend. Things could never go back to how they used to be... I need you in my life, and I'll do whatever it takes to make sure that happens. Just because I'm leaving, Channing... that means nothing. I will be back and we will be together... we will figure something out._  
 _This world has a lot to offer, but there is always something out there making it seem dark and lonely. I feel like, as long as I have you, no matter how bad of a day I'm having, no matter how irritated I'm feeling... as long as you're there... then I'll be okay. There are nearly 7 billion people on this planet, Chan... and out of all of them, I choose YOU._

_The best part... and maybe the simplest part of our relationship? Sitting next to you, doing absolutely nothing... means absolutely everything to me. Just being in your presence is enough... it will always be enough. Two weeks... two weeks was all it took for me to fall for you. I thank God every day that you came to that signing, Channing... that you were strong enough to put yourself out there. You were what I was missing from my life all this time, and I didn't even know it. I can't promise to fix all of your problems... but I can promise that you won't ever have to face them alone._

_Love, Nilla_  
 _P.S OLIVE YOU ;)_

As I finished Niall's letter, I realized the cab had stopped moving and Jetta was looking at me sympathetically. I wanted to hug her for letting me finish reading it before interrupting me.

"Are you okay, boo?" she asked, taking her fingers and swiping away some of the stray tears that were sneaking down my cheeks. I nodded my head and after embracing her for a moment, we climbed out of the cab; we grabbed all of our bags from the trunk and made our way silently into Jetta's quiet home. Her mother was at work, so it was just the two of us.

"Are you sure that your mother is fine with me staying here?" I asked hesitantly, combing my fingers through my hair.

"Of course Channing... you know you are always welcomed here," she said, placing her hands on my shoulders and hugging me tightly once more.

"Thanks Jet," I whispered against her shoulder, as I hugged her around the waist.

"I can't believe what's happened these past two weeks," she said randomly as we entered her room, throwing our bags into the corner. I nodded my head in agreement, as I glanced toward her bed, "I'm going to lay down for a little bit, ok?" I mumbled as I made my way toward the squishy mattress.

Jetta left the room, saying she was going to go make us something to eat; as I lay in the bed, I pulled my phone out and opened up my twitter application. Since Niall had tweeted me last night, tagging me in our picture, I've had more and more followers, not to mention, quite a lot of haters. I just ignored most of my mentions as I went to check out the trends. My eyes widened as I saw one that had to do with me:

**#ChiallerSaysGoodbyeOMGICant**

I smiled at the trend, clicking on it to see what people were saying, feeling a bit nervous as the tweets loaded. I cringed when I saw some pictures that were being posted of us; many of me crying, Niall and I hugging, and even a few of Niall subtly swiping his hand across his red rimmed eyes. The sight of those pictures alone were breaking my heart. As I glanced around a few different tweets, I noticed that another trend seemed to be in connection with the other one;

**#SheIsEverything**

Once I clicked on it, I felt my smile stretch across my face as I saw what all the fuss was about; Niall had replied to one of his fans who was asking about our goodbye;

**@niallsbabypotatoeee @OfficialNiall Niall, you've only been together... for not even 2 weeks. No need to be so dramatic. She can't mean that much 2 u chill bro**

As I looked down at Niall's reply, I felt relief wash over me and I smiled at the simple reply;

**@OfficialNiall @niallsbabypotatoeee you know nothing, she is everything**

I drifted off to into a comfortable darkness hugging my phone to my chest, pretending that I was still lying in his arms. I wrapped my fingers around both my locket and Niall's clover necklace... and even though I was alone, I didn't feel lonely. I felt loved by the two most important men in my life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Just so u know...**  
>  If you have a _wattpad_ account, please feel free to read this story (as well as the others in the trilogy) on there!   
>  Here are the search codes to add the stories to your library:  
>  **AKOTW- 8650401  
>  AKOTC- 11642890   
> AKOTL- 33093821**
> 
> C: <3 mandy

**Author's Note:**

> **can some one please teach me how to add a picture to the top of my fic? like seriously what do i do? help me bc stupid.**


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